How To Fund The Ocampo 6 in 2011

Revive your wet "seemingly dead" cell phone or make new all your scratched CDs DVDs

Noble causes are many, and even the best ones come and go leaving no trace behind except the feeling of snugness on the inside for having contributed to such a clear cut and straightforward demonstration of human will.

The campaigns are here with us, and indeed have started in earnest and are well underway on how to raise some extra cash to fund the trial of the Ocampo 6. Never mind that the implementation of some key reform programmes under the new Constitution may be delayed due to a shortage of money; there is always a surplus when the right people's lives are at stake for without key irreplaceable people to govern it what is a country?

These are rather hard times(see yesterday's blogpost) and the Ocampo 6 list of suspects already face the cold contempt of the public in daring them to touch public taxes to raise this aid money yet the internally displaced persons are still living in make shift homes 4 years after, and the average working mwananichi is already burdened with overtax. Therefore some inspiration is required on how to fund the list of suspects:

1)CDF

The soft underbelly of the NARC government was never intended to be used to serve partisan interests but instead was strictly earmarked to provide equal oppportunities for all constituencies to construction of roads, markets and schools; however its also true that the only specificic measurement of its effectiveness is how well it cushions Wanjiku from suffering, and MPs and other constitutional office holders also fall into that bracket. Rather than letting the chips fall where they may, let each county use their resources compassionately to determine the outcome of the fate of their leading stakeholders last passage of rites (read MP)

2)Wealthy local businessmen

Campaign funds can be financed through local sources such as shrewd businessmen who can see in which direction the wind is blowing and supply cash to the trial of the list of suspects in hopes of obtaining favours from them through their counties in the form of lucrative government contracts to provide services to such regions whose MPs are busy appearing in court and galantly fighting false accusations of crimes against humanity. This will in no doubt improve the suspects image in leaps and bounds and further boost their post prison presidential bids in a grand way

3)Political party sponsors

Every political party in Kenya has its backers, and sometimes they have even been foreigners. These sponsors know how the bread of political parties is buttered, and using their political skills and past experience can pour their bottomless funds into the trial of the Ocampo 6. The favour will be returned by having their name etched in the halls of government which they can then use to open doors for them in future to gain government backing for awards of tenders

4)The Church

These include the church network which has a well known reputation for sponsoring community projects that benefit the country and this is no exception. Kenyans are a religiously church going people, and clearly the church in Kenya has bottomless bags of money as seen from the recent constitution referendum, they can successfully fund causes they believe in to be just

Withdrawing from the Hague will not stop the ICC process, and tackling the bull by the horns and head on is the only way to ease panic among the political class. no matter public opinion everyone deserves a fair trial before being found guilty in the eyes of the one and only law, and funding the Ocampo 6 will give them a chance to go down fighting. God bless Kenya

Doing Brisk Business With Carcass Kenya

Kenya’s ruling class is taking our legendary entrepreneurial skills to new levels as the Kenyan population prove to be the handiest goods of trade. You can browse the preface to this FRAUD thriller as the IDPs are turned into a lucrative cash cow by industrious minds.

But the ultimate prize goes to those with unadulterated DNA aboard MV Triton Petroleum Company destined to ECONOMIC NIRVANA. Poor ex KPL and KTB bosses! They were so mesmerized with the amount landing on their laps oblivious of the MEGA deals transacted over their heads. The energy ministry is headed by an experienced hand steeled by the Anglo Leasing fame.

Why chase shadows when the kingpin at the heart of the whole scandal has DNA traceable to State House? Creating smokescreens to buy time and mask challenges are our national pastimes. The Kenyan-like elaborate conspiracy by KPC, Triton and Ministry of Energy top officials makes laughable the so-called plastic search for Triton chief Yagnesh Devani and KPC ex-Operations Manager Peter Mecha.

If you thought the era of genocide in disguise where chalk was shamelessly sold as chlorine belonged to last millennium think again. The kings and princesses of FRAUD have the exclusive access to the national till and they will RAPE cow Kenya till the last drop of blood.

Martha Karua’s noise at the thieves will only leave her face splashed with vomit from the gluttons. Her thin-veiled political tantrums amounts to too little too late efforts redeem her face after being the public and intellectual face of the same scoundrels early last year. The Swahili saying malipo ni hapa hapa has been materialized so speedily.

Kenyans must be the most resilient and tolerant people this side of the planet. How else would you explain being led by a ZOMBIE whose modus operandi is total contempt and sickening insensitivity? Make no mistake. These vultures will circle prey Kenya secure in the knowledge that their educated tribesmen and accomplishes will rush to their defence spewing exotic village vitriol.

Our national mantra must be anchored on the premise that if carpenters live on making coffins why not expand the business to kill the living. Well, the small and average-mined Kenyans can continue complaining about scarce unga, oblivious of the truth that they can as well survive on cake which their political masters stock in plenty for their dogs.

Exotic vitriol
No amount of brinkmanship and grandstanding can purchase moral authority. Everybody is in greedily exploiting any available opportunity/position feathering their nests with the mindset of security in numbers. The boss is nude and will never dare point a finger lest he is paraded in his birthday suit.

The feeling is mutual when a president trivializes national challenges with unforgivable remarks that taunts his voters to fight if they so wish. That version of contempt manifests itself here aplenty when schooled villagers abroad deride other Kenyans' concerns as whining instead of seizing the opportunity to join the looters.

Well, the time of reckoning is nigh and no DNA will be safe from the wrath of marauding Kenyans when the shit hits the fan fuelled by food riots. The upper echelon of the shameless looters may escape but the reprieve will be temporary as proved by Mobutu’s fate. Nothing lasts forever and very soon the scoundrels will dutifully earn their collective wages of national sin against fellow Kenyans.