Kenya's Infant Scoundrels

Some ridiculous things can only take place in Kenya. Seeing Bishop Muiru’s pastors expediently denouncing their Boss at smacks off tactlessness without parallel. The men of God chose to join the politicians in peddling cheap lies at the alter of poltical expediency.

It makes you wonder where these pastors have been all these months since Muiru announced his presidential candidature. Maybe they know a thing we don't and they are simply escaping from a sinking sheep. Who knows whether the maximum miracles have dwindled with resources exhausted in campaign? Expect Kenyans to smell opportunities (plastic or others) miles away.

Now that they don't find Muiru qualified to lead why not denounce their faith all together. Religion is really opium of the people and as Luke wont to say Kenyans are its loyal consumers.

Legislating science
Add these developments to Henry Obwocha's directive to KEBS to legislate science and Kenya becomes a fertile ground for breeding infant scoundrels with no element of shame in mouthing ridiculous directives. How I wish they would even pretend to give these litany of goofs some resemblance of tact. But that is just a wish and no horse to ride.

You can only imagine what others in the wide world think of our leaders when they read Obwocha demanding a specific number of samples for opinion polls. Conducting a mini census defeats the premise of sampling. But this Kenya where pigs grow wings.

Kenyan Pigs Grow Wings on Dec 27

As the day of political reckoning beckons on December 27, the Kenyan political landscape is souring with heat as never seen before. Swearing and sweating have taken new dimensions. Add the WAVERING opinion polls to the mix and you get a hotbed steaming with both passion and hatred.

With less than three weeks to go it is ALL SYSTEMS GO and nothing from the profane and ridiculous is spared. The ‘three’ presidential contestants have all their sight singularly fixed on the ultimate prize. The incumbent has rediscovered an aspect of his energetic self that must have hibernated only to come at the opportune time in his sunset days as he brawls in a political duel of his life.

Across the political road, the stakes has never been HIGHER for his ODM challenger. According to Raila he may be having a chance of a lifetime to prove a point and banish stereotypes. In addition he has what is kin to a political guillotine’ around his neck and he has three weeks to free himself and his pentagon or perish collectively.

Enacting miracles in hell
Meanwhile Brother Stephen Kalonzo Musyoka angles his candidacy as the middle ground paved with miracles. And there lies both his strength and Armageddon. You only resign to heavenly intervention for earthly pursuit at the risk of being called an ego rider at best or a joker at worst.

Reading the former LSK boss Ahmednasir declaring Kalonzo’s candidature as fundamentally undermined by two huge blanks in his resume: lack of a proud history identifiable with Kenya and fascination with pedestrian ideas in everything 24-hour.

But give it to Steve he has shown rear political guts espoused by few albeit betrayed by his past. The ODM-K presidential candidate is only doing what every Kenyan politician is good at and that is prey into electorate’s insecurity with a religious dose.

Granted, Ahmednasir’s is a brilliant Cornell graduate who dared take on the mighty like Justice Kwach during his LSK tenure. But his jibe that Kalonzo’s candidature is bereft of belief nor principle that only amounts to a naked attempt to catapult an average candidature to the political elite of presidential candidacy based on nothing other than the token numbers of his ethnic group definitely salts many raw wounds even here at Kumekucha.

Whipping his ethnic community’s for his presidential bid yes and why not when everybody does it? Moreover that may be our Kenyan version in the wisdom of charity beginning at home. Retreating to the shell of ethno-nationalism remains the forte of all our politicians that aptly earns them the SCOUNDRELS tag.

So will pigs fly in Kenya after December 26? Well I dare not comment lest I fall prey to cheap swearing on behalf of scoundrels who will not contribute anything to my persona. May the best candidate win, na bado

The Expedient Loving Political Face

Kenyan politicians must be the undisputed masters of plastic smiles. Seeing them plant those fake smiles on their faces while soliciting for votes pretending to show concern with the real evil intentions running deal in their hearts leaves one's intestines turning.

Looking at Minister Gabriel Muskari Kombo smiling gleefully in this picture while leaving a shack for a house aptly captures this hypocrisy. These scoundrels must be the most heartless of homo sapiens alive. Otherwise how do you stay sane and blameless leading people is such a state of poverty?

But make no mistake. Our politicians are just playing smart alecs taking advantage of our state of mind as Kenyans. They rope us in their evil schemes only to damp the same ladders as toilet tissue once used. Swearing and sweating on their behalf comes in all shades, the elite here on Kumekucha and the 'crude' version out there.

Until we stop our politicians dead on their tracks by holding them accountable, they will continue ridding on our backs as they serve their selfish interests in our name. We must reclaim our lives and country now and not tomorrow. Anybody out there to join me for the long haul?

Revealed: PNU Rigging in Progress

To those who have been following the story regarding the printing of fake ballot papers for the 2007 general elections, here is the latest information.

Aggrey Muiruri is in Brussels he was seen at Wetstraat near Lex building. He is booked in the Parc d'Evere hotel opposite Brussels main cemetery. Muiruri is an employee of FastPrint which printed Rift Valley leaflets depicting Raila hanging Mr Moi. Kihara Mutu ECK commissioner met Nigerian forger in Portmouth in UK. The Nigerian is a well known fake dollar and euro printer.INK removal substance a compound of methy has been procured by Mr Lennie (read 1m dinner plate guests).

The cargo is destined for Eldoret international airport from Dubai aboard DAS cargo flight.The substance is part of the rigging material.

It is a pity that ECK Chairman(Samuel Kivuitu) is relying on Kenya Police to investigate what is obviously serious crime even after being provided with evidence of samples of pre-marked ballot papers. Which makes us ask, is he repaying the appointing authority for renweing his term in office or is he going to be serious this time round, because he certainly was a toothless bulldog in the by-elections that took place in the recent past!

Will Kenyans allow the rip-off to continue?

Jimmy Kibaki Tosha

All political guns are out blazing. And who said Jimmy Kibaki was politically timid? The next Othaya MP is out and about selling his father's re-election bid. Seeing him addressing the crowd in Narok leaves no doubt that his sight is not limited to his dad's shadows.

The Kibaki family is out campaigning full blast for the first time. With Lucy pitching camp in Western, Judy running the logistics at the secretariat and Emilio himself showing a reserve of energy combing Rift Valley like never before.

Add to that the network of steely ambassador and activist at large Mary Wambui and the ODMs must be sleeping with both eyes wide open. It is all systems go and the political heat in the next three weeks will rival the inner sanctums of the sun. To spice this will be heightened dirty and hate campaigns. Na bado.

Rat Race to State House 2007

The leading presidential candidates conveniently put last week's party nomination fiasco behind them by puling no stops in launching their final dash in the state House race. But the political terrain is so bumpy leaving them to cling to hope and Kenya's good manners of forgetting fast and doing their bidding.

President Kibaki must have seen it coming by snubbing a bonding session with PNU nominees at KICC leaving his ever loyal deputy Uncle Moody to soothe the hostile moods of PNU aspirants and losers. And as good leader he only appeared at the right time with the right stuff in hosting a sumptuous lunch at Intercontinental hotel.

Careful not to reopen gaping political wounds, Kibaki steered clear of controversy and even toned down on his earlier directive for a three-piece PNU voting. That is vantage Kenyan politician for you, ready to sup with the devil with eyes singularly trained on the ultimate trophy.

But PNU is not out of the political woods yet. The many fringe parties supporting Kibaki are meeting tomorrow to 'brainstorm' on the impact of Emilio's weekend directive to recognize only PNU nominees. Reading in between the line where no words is printed this amounts to clever blackmail. They are daring the Kibaki to ignore them at his own political peril. Knowing what is at stake your guess on the heat
ahead is as good as mine.

Pawns in the political game
Across the city at Bomas, the juice from hitherto sweet orange proved too bitter for nomination losers. They came to claim glory in loss and alive to the titanic battle with the incumbent ahead, the Pentagon has never been more soft and reconciliatory.

Beneath all this mad race to rule and not lead us lies the true colour of our leaders. They lie with straight face and will stop at nothing to cheat their way into our hearts and power.

Desperate times calls for desperate measures. Now madam Ngilu can afford to let the cat roam out of the political bag by broadcasting to all and sundry that she kept Narc party in her bag to wade off Kibaki and ''save Kenya'. That is EXPEDIENCY per excellence.

But wait a minute. Who is fooling who here? Picture this. Kibaki wins the presidency and Kanu wins most seats, who becomes the Official opposition? Or worse still, Raila wins and a Ngilu also coasts with a sizable number of Narc MPs out of the 78 who sought political solace in her outfit after losing the nominations.

Scoundrels per excellence
The tenth parliamentary may be just as chaotic if not more selfish than their discredited and shameless ninth counterparts. The only constant in all this political dynamics is that we as Kenyans have accepted to remain pawns in the political games played out by these scoundrels for politicians.

In a nutshell we are inevitably staring in the face another 5 years of whining and more political motions with no commensurate movement. Welcome to Kenyans brand of politics. Na bado.

890 Begin Mad Race to (Mis)lead Kenya

With almost 1000 Kenyans queueing to join the club of waheshimiwa, the big battle and race to next month's elections being in earnest. With only 210 seats vacant, the next 30+ days will witness political heat like never seen before in Kenya's history.

The galaxy of contestants all have their eyes singularly trained on the trophy of goods besides the hefty pay cheque. And this is the time our collective conscience and efforts are auctioned at the altar of sectarianism and pettiness.

The obscene number of aspirants with a poor province like Coast having well over 200 only goes ahead to betray the predictable poor quality winners. The price surely negates the high stakes. True, a part from religion only politics flourishes in Kenya with no correlation to economic depression. So let enterprising Kenyans cash in.

Moreover you cannot blame Kenyans either because they can only afford to make hay when it is still shinning because the sun will disappear only to reappear with same lies in 2012. In the process the highest bidder takes our national soul in his/her pocket and either chose to resuscitate it or kill it within 5 years.

Different acts, same script
Painfully the few faces that embody our hopes have no chance in hell to make it anywhere near the podium come December 27. The KJ's of this world cannot stand the tide that sweeps anybody with shallow pockets and no tribal goons nor mouths for hire.

The shameful 9th parliament selfishly and unwittingly placed political noose around their necks by coating their seats with honey which political bees have found irresistible. In the face all aspirants it amounts to acting differently but the script and objective is the same.

If only wishes were horses, how I pray these madness came and passed as fast a bad dream. Well, this a true necessary and legal devil we have to entertain. Na bado.

One Vote for Ksh 1 Million

Finally the 1 million a plate lunch came to pass at Safari Park Hotel this afternoon. While it is a practice the world over to raise campaign funds, one is left wondering who is fooling whom when Isaiah Kabira categorically denies the same.

According to Bw Kabira you need to pay Ksh. 1 million upfront to attend the launch of President Kibaki's campaign website. Even the goof-prone Mutua can spin better than that.

Meanwhile Kenyans continues to threaten Brazil for the number one global trophy for the most unequal country.

Kenyan Mouths for Rent to the Highest Bidders

Trust ingenious Kenyans to smell monetary opportunities miles away. In attempt to beat politicians in their own game creative Kenyans have formed organized heckling clubs for hire.

The mouths for hire couldn't have come at an appropriate time given the soaring political temperatures. After the preamble in the fiasco that was nominations, trust our scoundrels to take the game a notch higher by perfecting dirty tricks. At the coast the hecklers are ready with drums and trumpets at the right fee.

Before you dismiss them just take an honest look at most Kenyans and see the negligible difference between their form of clothed (elite) political scare mongering and these rag tag goons. It takes no nuclear physicist to see what these goons will graduate to when need arises as December 27 beckons. Brace yourself for interesting and trying moments these coming 4 weeks.

The selfish opening between the chin and the nose has never been put to a better use. No wonder all other part of the body belongs to the mouth. "Don't step on my toes", as if the lower limbs belong to the mouth! Na bado.

Fiasco, Chaos and Blood Bath in Polls

All the pretence to Kenya's political maturity was unmasked in today's party nominations. The hot and charged contests in almost every polling station let trails of blood that make previous election violence look like Sunday school chorus singers.

The scenes stretched from the absurd to the most comical. Sample this: an ex-MP emerges from the blues with stuffed ballot boxes and shamelessly proceeds to demand counting. On his protest from his opponent a brawl ensures with his guards drawing guns on the ready. Other places reported abduction of return officers so the scoundrels ended up declaring themselves winners.

The sad sad tale from the long-awaited primaries was simply a FIASCO for lack of a stronger term. To say it was chaotic is an understatement. And no political party was spared the nasty tag, they were all in the mix of bloodletting.

No weapon nor trick was spared as most aspirants engaged in all the known and unknown dirty tricks to win. And the POOR organization from respective party offices didn't help matters either. In some places voting material had not arrived by night fall and your guess is as good as mine what the scenario was and will continue to be.

Political Armageddon
The dearth of any trace of civility only goes a notch higher to explain the high premium attached to elective politics in Kenya. And why not fight tooth and nail to jump from rags to millionaire in less than a year?

If we thought our politicians were scoundrels then we better brace ourselves for the absolute political theatre of the unrivalled absurd. Next parliament promises to be populated by people who know why they are there: EXPEDIENCY per excellence. The next 40+ days will surely see Kenyans drowning in their own blood. God save Kenya.

Party With Pattni

Jovial looking KENDA chairman Kamlesh Pattni yesterday launched his party manifesto with gusto. Brimming with confidence, he assured would be parliamentary aspirants vying for a seat on his party ticket that if they so wished they did not need to abandon support for their preferred presidential candidate even as they gunned for victory in up-coming elections on a KENDA platform
Welcome to the advent of out-sourcing in politics made in Ken(da)ya-here we see KENDA as a unique second-to-none example of a multi-party open source platform-its shareware, and its free-for-all; indeed one sizes does fit all. The party (read political) has become a real party (read funfare)-all are invited and no one (person) is truly running the show . Whoever said a house divided against itself cannot stand had obviously never come across the type of parties found (thrown) in Kenyan politics-enjoy yourself thoroughly and without restraint because whoever wins you win also-sio kwa ubaya lakini hawa wakenya ndiye wapumbavu sisi ndiye werevu
Multi-party open source politics announces but never produces any real leader(s) with whom the buck stops. Is this similar to Judas ready for his 30 pieces of silver? Indeed movement generating alot of heat without light. Still, there are other good enough reason to jivunia kuwa mkenya

Teaching Moisim

Former President Moi has appealed to Kenyans to absolve President Kibaki from blame for the mistakes committed during his five year term, saying responsibility had been assigned to people serving in his Government and they should take the blame for the wrongs
Poor Moi, here we see him finally being forced to publicly reveal one of the dark secrets to his 24 years of being the unwanted yet unbeatable professor of politics- simply pass the buck along to somebody else, let them carry a big cross, but never claim responsibility for what people don't know you did
The past 5 years have left us in no doubt that the incumbent President Kibaki was once one of the Professor's best students; he also excelled in hands off, eyes off and ears off style of leadership in the passive running of his Government
In looking ahead to 2012 and the future leaders of Kenya at that time, they must not allow themselves to falsely believe that they also can avoid the consequences of dodging their responsibilities. Former President Moi's example shows that he failed to realize even to this day that as head of state he was not only responsible for what he said or did, but also for what he didn't say or do-His irresponsibility could well be the reason why Kenya lagged behind in development the way it did during his long stint as Commander-in-Chief
During his time in power, the incumbent President Kibaki sought to make his Government take more responsibility for the improving the lives and welfare of Kenyans, assuming that those he gave responsibility to would be responsible and he would not need to crack the whip over their heads. How wrong he was-for many of his lieutenants, and indeed for all his 209 colleagues, the responsibility of governing a country justly was harder to bear than the self-inflated feeling of importance that came from many of their overnight rags to riches stories. I only hope this president has finally learnt that you can delegate authority but not responsibility. Should President Kibaki win the upcoming December general elections, he must of necessity consider cabinet portfolios as privileges not gifts to be dished out as rewards to his cronies for their loyalty to him. MPs who accept ministerial dockets should consider themselves as having an opportunity to give something back to the country they owe so much to, and instead of vice versa. Come January 2008, no alibi will be good enough for Kenyans to excuse a sitting public servant from absconding his official public duties and responsibility of uniting this country and moving the nation forward prosperously

Our False Prophets and Fake Miracles

Watch out which miracle you believe in. A UK court has ordered the extradiction of Kenyan born INFAMOUS miracle baby bishop Gilbert Deya. The court found the self-proclaimed bishop of Gilbert Deya Ministries has a case to answer in Kenya on five counts of child stealing between 1999 and 2004.

But true to the Kenyan spirit of the rich playing games with the law, lawyers for Deya have already indicated they were going to appeal against the extradition order arguing that he was unfairly targeted and will appeal. Money can truly buy freedom and Kenyan government's attempt to have Mr Deya returned to face trial will definitely continue in British courts for months to come.

Preys of the souls
One lesson from this Deya circus though: WATCH THE MIRACLE YOU BELIEVE IN. And even more poignant this election season is WATCH who you associate with or who finances any of your itinerary. Afterall there exists what is referred to as GUILT BY ASSOCIATION.

Any shameless defenders out there can mouth whatever they fancy but scoundrels whether in church or politics must be NAMED and SHAMED. Deya can run but he cannot hide. His claim to siring so many kids who were DNA disapproved cannot fool any dimwit unless he officially owns up to practicing PLURAL marriages aka polygamy. But can (will) he? No need to belabour that question and your guess is as good as mine.

Church is many thing to different people with the common thread being PREYING INTO INDIVIDUAL INSECURITIES. Any other argument only amounts to engaging in self deception.

Things We Do For Votes

Sell your soul or S(H)AVE your face?

Taking The Battle To Heaven

As Mwalimu is wont to often remind us, there are no morals in politics just EXPEDIENCE. every scoundrel UNmasked has his/her use, after-all aren't we all children of the most high?we know the almighty does not gamble or play dice and as the all-knowing One surely He has already forseen the future and by now knows who is going to win elections doesn't He? Nonetheless even the almighty God's wisdom cannot deter our politicians who from both sides of the divide seek to curry His favour in hope that He changes His mind-both sides will continue to seek prayers for divine intervention, asking to be granted courage not to give up even when the cause seems hopeless. Eh mwenyezi Mungu hebu tusaidie. God bless Kenya

The Law is a Coloured Ass

With Samuel Kivuitu's tenure coming to an end 25 days before this year's general elections slated for December 27, the political stakes are threatening to hit the roof. Raila and Kalonzo may have shown their unity in desperation but Kibaki has already shown who is in charge by sending home Kivuitu's deputy Mukele and five others this week.

Among all the present ECK commissioners, only Kuvuitu, Kihara Muttu and Jack Tuma have handled elections before. Well the President has done nothing unlawful and all his apologists will shout 'it is his prerogative'. But come to think of it. Political maturity, sanity and tranquility is nurtured more on perception of fairness than on mere lawful deeds.

Every constitutional office comes with commensurate responsibilities most of which are extra-legal. Loss of trust is the price you pay for sacrificing goodwill at the alter of playing plastic fidelity with the law.

Law or the box?
But just a minute. The Kenyan law stipulates 5 years for tenure of ECK commissioners. So reappointing Kivuitu would takes him to the next election year 2012 when political tension will be predictably back with us. Speak of being trapped in a perfect vicious cycle.

True, Kivuitu's present position makes him vulnerable to forces he is meant to serve independently. And yes he is an epitome of a rich institutional memory on elections. Removing him at this hour would definitely undermine public confidence in the ECK as the ultimate arbiter in the forth coming polls especially if Kibaki predictably elevates his lawyer Mutttu to ECK chair. What to do?

We cannot afford any productive lives with the present Kenyan constitution which is not only expensive but a fossilized Lancaster document. Any useful change in governance must start with a new constitution. To be honest the root of all tribal and political tension can be raced to selective application of our laws.

We are collectively victims of political expediency when leaders violate the law or apply it selectively. A new constitution will guarantee prosperity to all Kenyans regardless of who is the occupant of State House.

Israel, Italy and Japan change governments virtually every year but remain very stable thanks to established institutions. We need a new constitution now and not tomorrow. But who will deliver us to Canaan? Or put differently who will BELL these cats (scoundrels)? Any takers out there? God have mercy on us, God save bless Kenya.

Uprooting the Mugumo Three

By Wanjiru Kinuthia-Hussein

Watching the events unfold as the countdown to this year’s general election calls to mind scenes from the last 44 years of independence, struggle for liberation, bad governance and prosperity for the few After Kenyans unanimously kicked the Kanu government out of office in 2002, it may be surprising to witness the elected officials who were mandated to ensure Kanu was kept out, inviting the same group to form part of our government.

But let’s delve deeper to try and understand why this happened, on whose mandate did the elected officials act? Was the ballot loud enough in the last polls as to who Kenyans wanted in their government ..... the most pressing question is ......Of what does this new Kibaki-Moi-Uhuru axis represent?

May be someone was right when he said "Removing Kanu from power is like cutting the mugumo tree with a razor blade." And yes Kenyans in the last liberation may just have cut the mugumo tree with "not a razor blade" but with a power saw. So now what is being witnessed is the mugumo tree shooting and trying to rise once again.

So the time has come to not cut it once more but to UPROOT it from its foundation "roots" and all that it stands for. In My opinion the "mugumo tree" now represents the three richest families in Kenya. It is also the families who have ruled us for the last 44 years and yes the families who own the most land in Kenya.

In his Book, "The Elusive Quest for Growth" William Easterly describes his World Bank visit to Cairo in Egypt in a conference to study the wealth and poverty of nations; he says that Cairo throws back the same question at his team. "Why is Egypt so poor four millennia after the pharaohs built the pyramids?" And He responds "a quick back of the envelope answer is INCOME DISTRIBUTION".

The Pharaohs had everything and the masses had nothing. The Pharaohs enriched themselves with the labor of the masses. Rich elites do a fine job of erecting monuments for themselves and selecting polices that ensure the status quo is maintained at the expense of the larger masses. So prosperity for the few in Egypt has lasted four millennia but the majority prosperity remains elusive.

So the time is NOW for Kenyans to choose prosperity, to choose to destroy the status quo and to choose polices that equitably distribute income. We need to choose leaders that will break this vicious cycle of rich few and put us on path to prosperity for all. Is it a wonder the poorest areas of our nations (Nyanza, Coast, North Eastern) have remained so each successive government? There is only need do one thing this December "UPROOT THE MUGUMO TREE" once for all.

Final word of caution to the voters. Most ambitious people have realized being in parliament is a career in and of itself and a sure way to enrich themselves given the perks earned by MPs. Be wary of wolves in sheep’s clothing, who purport to represent you but are only preying on your vote for what it can do for them .... You know who these are .....

Reducing Our National Heroes to Zero

Events from this year’s Kenyatta day celebrations paints a very scenario for Kenya. One question that comes to mind is the need and rationale of holding public meetings that besides nostalgia add no meaningful value to our national stature. Wasting economic man hours in the scorching sun listening to political rants and showdowns is nothing to be proud of in the 21st Century.

We need clearly defined holidays meant to celebrate Kenya’s liberation and freedom that is bereft of personalities. An honest look into our past reveals naming of these holidays as the genesis of cult building and worshipping among our leaders. A change to Mashujaa Day would make more sense in honouring all heroes while taking the focus away from an individual.

By extension if the truth be don’t some section of Kenyan have this misconception that they have LARGER stake in Kenya than the other 41+ communities. Yes that is rain that feeds our tribal superiority complex. Tribal tensions have never been higher in Kenya’s 40+ years of independence.

Give a Kenyan politician a handshake and he will surely extend it past the elbow. Using public forum meant to foster national unity and cohesion to advance sectarian politic is to belittle the collective intelligence of Kenyans. We must think outside the box and reclaim our country from these scoundrels.

Perils of Personality Politics
The three leading presidential aspirants can be aptly characterized as: perfectionist of old school of thinking, handsome cowards and charismatic potential bullies. You are at liberty to attach names to each of these descriptions and I guarantee you won’t go wrong.

The unpleasant truth is that all the presidential aspirants are peddling lies which is amplified by their foot soldiers. While others are simply stroking fears among Kenyans. Part of this gang instead of fighting for political office, they are cleverly marshaling their supporters into a collective fright. The others are taking advantage of our gullibility to shepherd Kenyans into collective hatred for others.

Our politicians must be alive to the truism that you don't add any value to your campaign by bashing your opponent of supping with the critic to your enemy. But alas that is alien reality to our political shores. Engaging in reverse logic by attempting to punish what you cannot conquer is naivety at its best and destructive at worst.

Continuing with Moi’s ruinous legacy of trivializing national issues to cheap propaganda must be condemned. We are all slaves to that error which perfected grandiose ego trips at the expense of the national good. Kenya is bigger than any of these pretenders and belongs to all of us. We must stop being apologists to delusions minted by these scoundrels. The real Kenyans must stand up and do it now and not tomorrow for that will be too late. But will we? Your guess is as good as mine. And we haven't seen anything yet.

Vijana na Kibaki

Vijana wazee! Who is fooling whom here?

1. VIJANA NA KIBAKI
Moi - 1924
Awori - 1927
Karume - 1929
Michuki - 1930
Kibaki - 1931
Nyachae - 1932
Muhoho - 1938
Muthaura - 1940
Kombo - 1944
Makwere -1945

Mean age = 73

2. ODM Pentagon
Raila - 1945
Nyaga - 1950
Musalia - 1960
Ruto - 1966
Balala - 1967

Mean age=49

3. REST OF AFRICA
South Africa : Mbeki - 1942
Uganda: Museveni - 1945
Tanzania: Kikwete - 1950
Nigeria: YarAdua - 1951
Ethiopia: Zenawi - 1955
Rwanda: Kagame - 1957
Burundi: Nkurunziza - 1963
DRC: Kabila - 1971

Mean age=53

Coming Slow, But is he Sure?

Many theories and explanations have been coined to explain Kalonzo's colourful launch of his presidential bid. One thing that stands out from all the analysis is that the Mwingi North MP is building political momentum that is threatening to upset the hitherto two-horse race.

Either the donkey has undergone a transplant and acquired a horse legs or the horses' legs have gone jelly and soon transforming themselves into an ass. Give it to Steve the confidence he exudes betrays any sense of losing. And in the even that he fails to make it, his attitude makes for a very respectable loser.

The change in Kalonzo's political fortune can be attributed to many things. One either his composure is an indication he knows something the opinion polls are not telling us or he has a watertight fallback plan B. Being an astute politician, Pauline's sweetheart cannot be naive and he knows the benefits of foolproof fall back when the chips are down.

Three-party Kenya
Behind every political dark clouds may just lie some national silver lining. May be, and just may be, the present division and tension would help herald a three-party Kenyan state. What a blessing in disguise that would see the tribal outfits die a natural death? That would be a marvelous wishful thinking which is realizable if only the parties would have their foundations premised on distinct ideologies unlike the present Kanu clones they shamelessly are.

Kalonzo’s bid to State House may be the unconscious button that would elevate Kenya to another level of political maturity. Staying the cause would certainly see his respectable regardless of the outcome. Were he to lose, he would definitely be in a class of his own not comparable to one Mr Simeon Nyachae in 2002. Go Steve go.