Early Bird PORK Bid

In the past few months there has been alot of unwarranted and thinly veiled ill intentioned dismissing of vice president Kalonzo Musyoka in several blog posts on this forum. The VP has been written off from featuring anywhere in the line up to the 2012 general elections, much less as a serious contender for the presidential vote (the first of many to be held under a new constitution). Questions have been asked such as what does the MP for Mwingi North have to offer, and what would he bring to the table if he couldn't even influence and sway voting patterns in his constituency as was seen during the recent referendum

In an apparent answer to both his online and long time critics the Vice president has this week launched his early bird no holds barred special campaign bid for the presidency. And why not? The Vice President's attempt to become the 4th president of the republic of Kenya will not be treated with the seriousness they deserve only by unperceptive cynics. The facts speak for themselves because here is a politician who just recently celebrated his silver jubilee in politics with exemplary record service representing his constituency from 1993 till date. This is not a man stuck in old ways of doing things

The vice president clearly is a man who is cut from presidential material cloth. Until now his diplomatic political skills have been temperately used in warding off childish political opponents friendly fire from their followers who are manipulated to harrass and intimidate public figures speaking at official functions. Kalonzo may have cut his teeth as a KANU politician but its clear for all to see he was only in the mama na baba party and not of it.

It makes alot of sense now for the VP to run for the presidency when at the dawn of a brand new beginning for the nation because as the 2nd in command he has been limited time and again by external circumstances that have prevented him from showing his true colours as a servant leader who would bring the much needed positive changes while remaining focussed on what he was elected to do. Here at Kumekucha we welcome the Vice President's early bird presidential bid

The March of Folly of a Vanquished and a Deluded Nation

By Mwarang'ethe

In the recent past, we have seen news by the DN focusing on the potential of so called new counties under our new wonderful constitution. For instance, see Turkana wonder tree here , Jua Kali in Kiambu here. Not to be left out, the elders and professionals have been gathering to strategise how develop their counties as we see in Mbeere, Narok and in Kiambu. All this noise stems from the failure to distinguish between availability of resources and the ability to create wealth from the same. In any case, we can dismiss all these meetings by asking, what is the material difference between these counties and existing municipalities? However, this is not the main issue.

To add flavour to all these, we are now training youthful leadership as we see here. Furthermore, in line with our “welfare state,” the poor Kenyans are demanding “free health care” led by professor Anyang Ny’ongo as we see here. Not to be left out, are our old men and women are asking the state to use violence so as to give effect to their right to pensions as we see here.

Meanwhile, few seem to realise that we are already raising taxes for the poor people so as to fund their “welfare” as we are reading: “Oil sector to break Sh100 mark over refinery's new fees”. In an earlier article on energy question, we wrote this: “The best way to understand how a society functions and therefore, malfunctions is to understand the energy question.” Please refresh your memory here.

As we read all of the above, we are also reading this: “KPLC pretax profit hit Sh5.6 bn" Inter alia, we are told that this “... was due to revenue growth and relatively lower increase in overall expenditure.” To the initiated, this simple statement tells the whole story. But, we shall return to this later. At the same time, we hear our Minister Mwakere lament that, the cost of energy is the major hindrance to our economic growth as we hear here. In this last video, we also we hear the C.E.O of EPZA saying how these zones create jobs, bring in foreign exchange and facilitate technology skills transfers. This is all monkey language, but, that’s a story for another day.

What these videos illustrate is nothing, but, a vanquished, but, also, a very deluded nation whose elite are unable to grasp that, we are a RENTIER ECONOMY or DEBT PEONAGE ECONOMY. And, the bitter truth is this. A rentier economy can only increase poverty for the majority, while enriching a few beyond imagination no matter what we do. But, what is a rentier economy? A rentier economy refers to an economic arrangement whereby, certain persons earn profit without production. Such profits like the KPLC’s, if they can be so called, are rents, which constitute a parasitic extraction of wealth from the REAL ECONOMY, i.e. labour and industrial economy. This economy is tilted to favour property owners (land owners), monopolists and creditors at the expense of those who produce goods and services. A widening share of national income must go to the landlords, creditors and other rentiers at the top of the income and wealth pyramid increasingly free of taxes. The wealth that produces these rentier incomes is not real capital investment, nor is it technological. It is created by law and politics, often by stealth and insider dealing.

When the West was industrializing (they have now foolishly de –industrialised), the guiding principle was public regulation of areas where competition cannot bring costs down such as transport, mineral bearing land, electric power, communications, radio spectrum etc. It is for this reason these nations kept natural monopolies like power in the public domain. In the USA, they organised them as regulated public utilities. All this was meant to limit the economic rent by bringing market prices into line with actual costs of production.

According to the economists who industrialised America (forget about useful idiots and deluded economists like Jeffrey Sachs who favour colonial welfare to be provided by bankrupt Western nations to Africa in the name of MDG’s), the success of public infrastructure investment in natural monopolies like the KPLC is its ability to lower the economy’s cost structure. For instance, the Erie Canal brought grain from the Western States to upstate New York minimising the cost of doing business. Thus, to seek the highest profit as the market would bear is to make rent – burdened economy uncompetitive which reduces industrial profits for the economy at large. This is the exact role the KPLC and other privatized monopolies are playing in our economy.

It was for this reason in the USA; the Interstate Commerce Commission put an end to the watered financial charges imposed by the RAILROAD BARONS (remember Kenya Railways saga?). Also, for the same reason, the Sherman Anti Trist Act of 1890 was used to break up the Standard Oil of the Rockefeller. These measures enabled the USA out compete others who did not enact progressive fiscal and financial policy.

In simple words, we have an economy full of toll booths installed at the most critical access points. To remove these toll booths, we must appreciate the financial debt dynamic which undercuts the INDUSTRIAL CAPITALISM in Kenya as well as in the USA and all over the world today. But, how does this come about?

Firstly, a nation is ordered by the IMF and WB to make sure its central bank (this is the FOURTH BRANCH of government, and an oligarchy) does not do what central banks were created to do. In our case, this happened in 1996 as we “struggled” with Moi with the assistance of our “friends.” Once this has happened (make the central bank “independent” and therefore, a lobbyist for commercial banks), our ability to create credit for public investments is cut. Once that is accomplished, we are instructed to privatise the natural monopolies which we cannot fund anymore.

This is where it gets interesting. The new owners of these monopolies do not spend any money they have earned. No, since they are connected to the money printing central banks of the West, Japan etc, they print dollars, pounds, yen etc which are WORTHILESS PAPERS and use them to “buy” our hard assets. At the same time, they ensure in our tax laws we treat debt interest payments as tax deductible expenses. In other words, the interest payments to the bankers are guaranteed by our tax laws. This is actual fiscal subsidy as compared to tangible industrial investment and operating profit. In other words, bank credit has been decoupled from CAPITAL FORMATION taking the form of mortgage credit and loans secured by corporate stocks.

Once these arrangements are in place, a number of things happen. For instance, in the case of the KPLC, they increase the cost of electricity connection and the electricity itself. This increment is not done to reflect the cost of connection, but, as a method of wealth extraction method from the labour and industrial capitalists, i.e. tribute. Secondly, once a monopoly such as the KPLC is in the hands of the rentier class, they issue bonds with its income stream and old assets as the collateral. This is in addition to the original debt used to acquire the assets. As a result, when income streams come in, instead of putting the same into expansion of KPLC, in research and development and improvement of services to the labour and industrial sector, the entire surplus is used to pay the creditors who created their money out of thin air. This leaves only the labour and industrial sector to bear the taxation burden.

So, what should be done? We have been told that to increase the efficiency of the KPLC and other monopolies we must privatise them. This is pure fiction. The best way of ensuring competition in natural monopolies would have been to leave KPLC in the public domain and then take bids on its operations. This would preserve it as a common; while through the bid process retain the benefits of competition. Instead of this common sense approach, Africans have been brainwashed to fully give up their rights for local control of land, resources, water and other basic services. The problem is that, once you do this, you must pay monopoly price which makes your economy uncompetitive in the global economy. The question is, with such an economy, how do you create jobs for the unemployed army in your wonderful counties?

Dear reader, you may find this startling, but, it is true. We are in the midst of the greatest commons enclosure which is worse and widespread than those of the land enclosure 18th – 19th Century in England and Scotland. In other words, we are now witnessing the most savage class war fare in the long bloody human history. It is not warfare between industrial capitalism and labour as Atwoli of COTU imagines. No, it is a war against labour and industrial capitalism by financial capitalism and land monopoly. In other words, we are witnessing the reconstruction of FEUDAL SOCIETY like that of the old Europe. However, instead of old military conquest, this time, the super elite are using financial system as the weapon. This makes this weapon even more dangerous because it is so hidden from the masses.

The original liberals, who championed the idea of democracy in the 18th and 19th century or even in the classical Greece, wanted to have popular governments that could stand up to the rentier class, i.e. the land lords and financiers (aristocrats). In the same manner, the classical thinkers like Adam Smith called for free trade to mean an economy bereft of free lunch, i.e. economic rent and financial interest. However, in an ironic twist of fate, the rentier class has captured governments all over the world and turned the meaning of free trade upside down. By so doing, they have effectively nullified democracy. As a result, no matter who you elect, he or she, must implement the on – going neo – feudal policies. It is for this reason we have asserted that, voting is the modern opium of the masses here.

Now, instead of reforming our rentier economy so as to allow labour and industrial capitalism to prosper, and therefore, end the depression, it seems all nations (the oligarchy) including the USA, China, France, and Brazil Kenya (128 KES is equal to £ 1 on 8th Oct. 2010) etc have decided to devalue their currencies. In other words, you devalue your currency, I devalue mine and on and on. This is meant to help the exporters. However, the consequence for the masses will be dire for they are destroying the masses buying power. Dear reader, keep this in mind. “Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value – zero,” so taught us Voltaire. You can calculate the loss of purchasing power of these useless papers here.

And, when this shit hits the pan, money being the glue that holds civilised society together, prepare for chaos. This chaos will give an excuse for fascism like that of Hitler and Mussolini. When all fails, there will be a major and we may add catastrophic war. By the way, we add that, today’s fiat currency laws (legal tender laws meant to force you to accept money which is losing value) were enacted in 1909 so as to help fight the 1 World War. So, we are celebrating 100 years of fiat money regime and the bloodshed it has funded.

Finally, we have been accused of writing complex things that many may find difficult to understand. We reply this way. Industrializing a nation requires very complex thinking and not peasant simplistic thinking as we witness in the above videos. But, let us clarify that, we have a lot of respect for peasants. We just note that, they are simple minded people, but, this kind of thinking is awfully inadequate in strategising how to develop a nation.

By this we mean that, we are a nation that seems comfortable in arriving at convictions without any inquiry and, or study. The result of this is that, we are a vanquished nation that is unable to understand the rules of ECONOMIC and FINANCIAL WARFARE. Those who develop economic warfare strategies are first class thinkers. To counter them, we must also deploy first class thinkers. Since we seem unable understand this and therefore, formulate appropriate defence strategies, we say that, in our convictions we are a very deluded nation which is on the march of folly.

ICC: Of Judge Rawal and The Hague Express

You cannot fault the Chief Justice Evan Gicheru for being alive to Kenya's morbid and rabid tribal realities. Granted, Lady Justice Rawal is more than qualified to help with ICC investigations on PCs and PPOs. But you don't have to be a neurologist or a NASA scientist to see why she was a safe bet among the LOCAL legal brood. No wonder the tribal Diaspora are already crying wolf that the good Judge is not Kenyan enough.

The adage the guilty are afraid and get exhausted chasing their own shadows could not have been more true. On one hand ICC wants official State minutes detailing (mis)handling of PEV and on the other Rift Valley MPs are asking the Hague-based court to investigate mass action planned at the ODM headquarters that produced the resulting chaos and destruction.

Well, as Chinua Achebe aptly summed it, a frog never leaps across the road if something is not after its life. ICC's singular determination to prove her case of crimes against humanity has foamed into a life of its own. Forget the tribal posturing, no amount of gerrymandering will cloud ICC's vision to met justice.

Fact, the genocide suspects are individuals and not tribes. They better get used to the truth that the dragon of of impunity has individual souls and no trace of collective ethnic loyalty. What is more, crime against humanity is often traceable to government turning its monopoly of violence against her own people. And lest we forget Kenya has never had a parallel government at any given point in time.

That our sickening tribal loyalty has acutely infected even the so-called exported bigots answering to the tag of Diaspora is shameful to say the least. And the politicians know it that is why they are drumming tribal emotions with the aim of sucking ICC into that primitive dark tunnel. Well, with all its warts notwithstanding, ICC has her sight singularly trained on the key suspects.

Outside the facade of sovereignty (if only that would stop us from self-destruction), the government has nothing to fear in providing those minutes. Similarly, the RV MPs are giving themselves away by shadowboxing and pointing fingers about mass action. They are fooling nobody but themselves with the hollow and cheap security in numbers mindset.

We failed ourselves and we have no moral grounds to shout otherwise under the cover of new constitution. The truth be said, ICC is rattling all suspects. And you know what, they are VERY AFRAID because they have no recourse to buy or delay justice. Let the suspects carry their own crosses no matter the wait. The tribal security in numbers is a cheap shot that won't wash.

ICC is only stepping in to fill the void left by our failed judicial system. Protesting that using the new constitution is typical deceptive Kenyan ways of living a national/tribal lies. Questioning PCs, PPOs and those who bankrolled the violence and murder must not be tribalized. Justice can only be frustrated but never defeated.

ICC: Ocampo Sucked in Kenya's Tribal Murk

Refrain 1: The ICC does not care whether you are a Kikuyu, Kalenjin, Luo or Mijikenda.

Refrain 2: ICC is not a tool to settle political (tribal) scores.

First, ICC's chief prosecutor is operating on an ILLEGALITY and Kenya has no blank sheet/vacuum to offer him for his destructive experiment. Our own Justice Minister Mutula Kilonzo told him the very basic that the new constitution has overtaken all his theatrics. What is more, Ocampo's desire to question PCs and PPOs is an obsession with offices that no longer exist in our laws.

Lius Moreno-Ocampo may have been hitherto a top notch law don in an Ivy League University prior to taking the ICC job, but as he will soon realise to his eternal embarrassment nobody can intellectually tackle Kenya's ETHNIC-based problems. ICC lost her case immediately the suspects successfully sold the dummy of OUR TRIBE is targeted. Game over and thinking otherwise is to entertain a mirage as an oasis. Period.

Lest Moreno forgets, there is no honour among hyenas. The adage of security in numbers works best when suspects with everything to loose gang up together to protect their interests. And you cannot blame them for celebrating on the graves of PEV victims because the living have a life to live and protect. Add that to the willing tribesmen and Diaspora who have seen the dark forces aiming to nub their tribal lord and Ocampo's goose if surely roasted and digested.

Forget all that scare about ex-Mungiki leaders secured abroad with dossier on Naivasha massacres. PEV targeted only one community and all others are pretenders to murder. Ocampo will meet his Waterloo in our own superlative legal minds led by ex-LSK boss Ahmednasir. Moreno may have succeeded in convincing some two out of three judges in the Hague but he is better advised to save his face from legal eggs by going slow and avoiding Kenya's TRIBAL minefield.

Ocampo has been warned. Woe unto him and his reputation (if he has any) should he dare venture into our EXPLOSIVE ethno-government.

ICC Curse: Trapped Between Devil, Deep Sea

The elephant that is ICC is refusing to burg. The Kenyan government is refusing to play ball too. In between Kenyan voter and IDP find themselves sandwiched between the devil and the dark blue sea.

We have been reliably informed by bloggers here at Kumekucha that behind ICC's enthusiasm to met justice to PEV victims and perpetrators lurks the evil schemes by some politicians to eliminate their potential rivals prior to 2012 elections. The wisdom from that logic implies that it is alright to leave the IDPs and those who were prematurely and mercilessly sent six feet under during the 2007/8 near-meltdown to their own devices.

When Justice Minister Mutula Kilonzo talks from both ends of his mouth on matters ICC, some support him for his bravery and patriotism. Well, if the new constitution is the panacea to all our problems then one is left wondering what the IDPs are still trapped in squalor. But that a concern for the politically naive because big things come at a prize and it seems none is too big to pay even with more than 1300 lives lost.

It is true the US and China are not signatories to the Rome statute but do we have to employ cheap security in numbers and reverse logic (hata wewe pia) after failing to protect the same voters? Kenyans are superlative spinners capable of shamelessly reading malice from an angel's lips. Behind all the plastic patriotism lies ethnic bravado and loyalty. But dare tell a Kenyan blogger that and you become an e-meal cooked in tribal vitriol.

ICC just like the international community came to save us from ourselves. Were it not for them, there would be no Kenya to speak of in the first place. Waxing patriotic to hide our primitive ethnic loyalties is to live a coloured lie. Well, the five-course tribal meal never constipates. We often wash it down with champagne made from ground conspiracy theories and served as intellectual discourse.

ICC must have seen it coming and Prof. Luis Moreno-Ocampo is better advised to brace himself for more roadblocks. He has not seen the last of Kenya's superlative schemers yet. Meanwhile the living Diaspora and Kenyan leaders continue to urinate on the graves of PEV victim, both burnt and sliced.

City By-election Results Rattles Political Parties

The recent by-election results is sending shock waves among hitherto united political parties. Having lost two seats, PNU as we knew it is tottering in the brink of disintegration. With Kanu, Ford People, Ford Kenya, New Ford Kenya and ODM-K deserting the coalition, we may as well be staring a new political dispensation all together.

But wait a minute, are these mere political tantrums founded on nothing but hot air or signs of a sober reality check? Well, you guess is as good as mine given the original shaky grounds on which the coalition was founded in the first place. Just like Nark before it, PNU appear far past its sell-by date. But don't tell that to its supplicants lest you become a ready e-meal.

While political spin doctors will shamelessly peddle the lie that the new constitution has no place for pre-poll pacts, the reality lies elsewhere and they know it. No party formed singularly for convenience can stand the occasional political heat like the one brought about by the Kabogo-Sonko axis.

May be we have to witness all the present phase of amorphous grouping as a process of political maturing. But again, it is only in Kenya where the so-called leaders lie through their teeth and the voter including the Diaspora and bloggers buy the deceit line, hook and sinker. The journey to political maturity will surely be both torturous and painful.

Or may be the stillborn political baby christened Progressive Democratic Movement (PDM) will save the day and orphaned political faces. But you only bet on any Kenyan political sloganeering at you eternal peril. Talk is cheap. What is more, Kenyans never disappoint when it comes to waxing patriotic and intellectual albeit of the plastic genre.

Here comes the theatrics premiere of 2012 Kenya style now showing at a microphone and a camera near you. Enjoy, NA BADO.

Iron Lady Martha Karua Floors Giants in Polls

Her Nark-Kenya party has bagged two more parliamentary seats and in the process floored PM in Makadara, VP in Juja and DPM in both Makadara and Juja. She may not be ruling but Martha Karua reigns supreme, at least for these by-elections.

You have to give it to the iron lady from Gichugu and her bare knuckles political fights. Thanks to her resilience, William Kabogo and Gideon/Mike Mbuvi Kioko have acquired the honourable titles before their names.

With an average turnout of 40%, the three by-elections epitomizes the curse and cost of democracy. Well, people get the leaders they deserve but having such a low turnout flips the argument on its head. While the electorates may be blamed for failing in their collective and individual civic duty, it is difficult for the emerging MPs to claim to be comprehensive representative of the people.

The latest by-elections also exposed the folly of Kenyans expecting different politics from the same old brood. The campaigns took the predictable and partisan path that read like any script from the years of yore. And the voters have themselves to blame because they cannot turn around and demand any better after going to bed with the same scoundrels.

Just like exams being the worst form of evaluation but for lack of a functional alternative, democracy is surely a curse and damn expensive. It may be tempting to wax intellectual with a think-outside-the-box prescription but viability and practicality will dissuade such pretense.

We have laid our bed and must sleep on it with all the moulds underneath. In the meantime congratulations to William Kabogo, Sonko Mbuvi and Bishop Dr Margaret Wanjiru. All the three winners owe their success to no king-pin with Mbuvi drawing the thickest of political blood while Kabogo has whipped the UK-Wiper alliance.

What is more, Bishop single-handedly upset the bookmakers even with ODM's lukewarm support. Well, I guess the cast will be complete when Maina Njenga becomes the Governor of Nairobi in 2012.

Shocking inside stories and the Bashir puzzle

What were the political objectives behind the Bashir visit to Kenya during the recent promulgation of the new constitution?

What analysts and insiders have to say is so fascinating that it almost borders on the bizarre.

President Al Bashir of Sudan in Nairobi for the promulgation of the new constitution

But first some shocking inside information. President Al Bashir left Kenya very hurriedly after the ceremony at Uhuru Park and although he came in through Wilson Airport, he left via the Moi Air base using the presidential jet. His own jet was left idling on the runaway at Wilson airport where unconfirmed reports indicate that a trap to attempt to arrest him had been set. It is not clear who may have been behind this gallant move to arrest Bashir but there are claims that the Americans were heavily involved (unofficially because they never signed the Rome statute). But this raises more questions than answers including the big one. Would it be possible to “unofficially” arrest a visiting head of state who has been invited by the host nation?

Anyway nagging questions aside, all this happened after the military were instructed to cut down dramatically on their rehearsed parade so that the function would be speeded up and completed much earlier. It is believed the main reason was to ensure Al Bashir’s safe exit out of Kenya. Some insiders go as far as saying that Kibaki was advised by NSIS chief Michael Gichangi that there were plans under way to attempt to arrest Al Bashir. The panic from this news is what is said to have caused the military parade and the ceremony to be cut short. Bashir was then smuggled out of Uhuru Park to State House and on to Moi Air Base Eastleigh for a quick flight back to Khartoum. He skipping the state luncheon and abandoned his own plane at Wilson Airport.

Not forgetting that Wilson airport was shut down for the first time in the history of the country solely for the use of President Al Bashir.

Skeptics who dispel the whole story about the behind the scenes drama over the basher story are hard pressed to explain why he entered and exited the country at different points.

Now the big question here is why would somebody take all this trouble caused by the invitation of a single guest to Nairobi? What would make all this trouble worth it? What was the main political objective?

There is mounting evidence that the Bashir visit was aimed at discrediting the ICC and its’ efforts to get to the bottom of the 2007 post-election violence that left so many Kenyans maimed raped and dead. Some of the chief perpetuators of the crimes against humanity committed mainly in January 2008 after the stolen election of late December are senior people in government who are very close to the president and he is keen that they are let off the hook. Hence all the Bashir acrobatics to score pints against the ICC and create an impression of how toothless they are. It is interesting to note that ICC special prosecutor Luis Moreno Ocampo revealed during one of his visits into the country that the ICC’s intervention had blocked Bashir from a planned visit to Uganda at the request of President Yoweri Museveni. Bashir’s toothy constant grin to the cameras in Nairobi was no doubt mainly for the benefit of the ICC. Bashir was telling them, “catch me if you can.”

More interestingly most political analysts agree that the plan worked and that indeed a lot of thunder has been stolen from the tempo created by ICC more so recently when they fully set up shop in the country to prepare for the impending prosecutions. These analysts insist that this master political stroke by Kibaki will be difficult to reverse and will have an impact on the planned prosecutions in Kenya. For instance the whole issue has attracted attention and given more credence to the cowardly ruling by the African Union to ask the ICC to withdraw the arrest warrant against Al Bashir.

See also:

Open letter to Ocampo from concerned Kenyans

Kumekucha's controversial Kalamari talks about the AU's decision on Bashir

Beware!!! Do you hate young Kenyans because they play their music too loudly?

There was this restaurant in Nairobi being run by a man in his fifties. He had been operating it for over 20 years and KNEW all the right things to do. Only that business gradually went downhill over the years. Finally, with the debts mounting he decided to call in a business consultant with the intention of selling off the restaurant for the best price possible.

It did not take long for the “young” executive from a well know accounting firm in Nairobi to figure out what the problem was.

Then Senator Barack Obama addressing a crowd of mostly young Kenyans

What had happened over the years is that the owner grew older and lost touch with his target clientele. He was busy doing things that would attract people his own age into his restaurant, sadly most of those guys are in semi-retirement and few of those still in Nairobi would go into a fast food joint in a prime location in the CBD.

The restaurant owner hated young folks. He did not like the way they dressed, they played their music too loudly and talked too loudly. He really hated their morals and their guts. And it showed in his restaurant. But sadly those were the guys he was supposed to be targeting.

This is the reason why many corporate companies these days change their marketing department teams pretty frequently never allowing them to grow too old. The result is that they easily stay in touch with their target market.

The way Kenyan politicians are behaving at the moment reminds me of that short-sighted restaurant owner, running a fast food joint for pensioners. It is business as usual for many of our politicians and they are busy playing the usual game of tribal arithmetic.

Today the Sunday Nation published a fascinating article based on the recently released Census figures that reveals that there will be an additional almost 6 million young people who will be eligible to vote for the first time in 2012. That is in addition to the high number of youngsters who unanimously gave a nod to the proposed constitution in the August referendum. According to my contacts on the ground older people voted against the draft constitution for various reasons and what made the difference is the huge percentage of young voters. Now picture the impact considering that another 6 million youngsters will be eligible to register as voters by 2012. And judging by the increased awareness amongst the young about how critical politics is to their daily lives, chances are that a sizeable percentage of these youngsters will register as voters.

Many politicians and even readers of this blog KNOW that Kenyans ALWAYS vote along tribal lines. They KNOW that the way to win a presidential election is to organize some powerful tribal alliances. They KNOW that elections in Kenya have never been issue-based. Well, they will know a little different in 2012.

Incidentally targeting the young is NOT giving exciting speeches and telling jokes that young folks can identify with.

Issues are very important for the brand new young voters of Kenya who will decide the next occupant of State house. Corruption is something else that has been brought to the forefront in recent times. Good looks too are important. And then these guys easily get bored and so very few presidential candidates if any will be able to successfully make long speeches and still hold the attention of their audiences. And as the Matuga constituency by-election a few months ago clearly illustrated the young people of Kenya are pretty unpredictable and can easily change their minds at the very last minute.

Revisiting long boring speeches, if you are Kalonzo Musyoka you will bore your audience who are already upset with your water melon ways and then blame your political rival for taking the trouble to organize a jeering crowd just for you from Kibera. The point is that such politicians stuck in their old ways of doing things will find it extremely tough going in 2012.

By the way the restaurant I started this post with was saved and retains the same owner to this day, only that he has employed some young mangers and listens to their suggestions. He hates young people less these days. Or shall we say that he is a lot more tolerant?

See also:
Breakthrough For Young Kenyan Presidential Candidate: Winds Of Change Blowing From Congo

Kenya youth are not idiots

Al Shabab terrorist attack was diverted from Kenya at last minute

Kumekucha exclusive

Somali terrorists deliberately chose a Ugandan target when a Kenyan one would have been more effective in sending their message home because they wanted to protect their vast interests in Kenya. This country has clearly become their centre of operating and the hub of the economy that keeps many Somali activities, legal or otherwise going.

This is after months of activities that suggested that Kenya was being set up for a terrorist attack. Last year several explosive devices linked to terrorist activities were found in the country. Which suggests that there was a change of heart at the last minute in deciding to target Uganda a landlocked country that is of little or no use to the Somali community.

In shocking information made available to Kumekucha it emerges that Kenya is such an important centre of activity for Somalis based all over the world that if they were to be shut down in Kenya everything would ground to a halt for them. Financial activities ranging from piracy earnings transfers to the financing of the same activities to financial activities to keep the Al Shabab going are all transacted through Kenya.

Indeed most of these activities suffered a massive temporary blow last January shortly after the riots over Muslims demanding the release of the radical Jamaican cleric, Abdullah al-Faisal, broke out in Nairobi. Faisal is on a global terror watch list and served four years in a British jail for inciting racial hatred. He secretly entered Kenya through Tanzania only to become a hot brick nobody wanted to touch and no airline wanted to fly out. In a major blunder Somali youths mainly believed to be from neighbouring Somalia caused mayhem especially around the Jamia mosque area which led to a massive crack down by the government to eject illegal Somali immigrants from the country. The crack down was more effective in lining the pockets of some officials with plenty of hard currency from Somalis rather than in solving any immigration problems facing the country. Still Somali power brokers learnt a lot from the mishap and the word on the street now is NOT to upset the apple cart in Nairobi in any way because it will jeopardize a lot of other “important things.”

In other words the shocking truth is that Kenya was saved from a terrorist attack only because of her generosity and welcoming hands to illegally immigrants from Somalia and allowing Somalis to set up shop for all kinds of illegal activities right here in Kenya no questions asked.

My informants tell me that in this kind of scenario it is extremely unlikely that Kenya will ever be a target for any Al Shabab attack. At least for now. But even more interesting is that this information suggests a clear link between terrorism and big Somali money in Kenya which is rather scary.

Predictions of a coming Kamba president?

Contrary to what most folks here think, I DO NOT enjoy putting down my community. I want only what is best for the Kamba and a much better future than what the past has brought. It saddens me at the dawn of one of the biggest breakthroughs Kenya has ever had, namely a new constitution, the same old diseases are holding the Akamba people back and threatening to push them from receiving any benefits like the rest of the country. That alarms me very much and is what inspired this series.

President inspects guard of honour during promulgation of constitution.

But let me tell you a fascinating tale first so that you understand my thinking in writing this no-holds barred ruthless analysis of the tribe that gave birth to me.

My story is about these two brothers who never finished high school. However it seems that they had grasped some key lessons in life when one is looking for a breakthrough. Namely start where you are and start by analyzing the failures. Failures are extremely valuable if you know how to handle them. I am of course talking about the Wright brothers (Orville and Wilbur). For years I have studied the methods they used in discovering mechanized flight with a fascination that will just not go away. The two started by gathering all the information they could find on previous attempts at flying. They studied them in great detail and then started their work with the failure they thought was closest to success. One of the really important things they did was to develop the most accurate wind tunnel of the time. This is for experimentation and gives you an idea in exact scientific terms of the lift of your wings and aircraft considering its’ weight and shape. And so when the two exhausted but excited brothers gathered at Kitty Hawk, North Carolina; December 17, 1903 they were not hoping for a miracle, they already knew from their calculations that the dammed thing was going to fly.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wright_Flyer

That’s why history, even your own personal history can be life saving, but the key in analysis is to be brutally honest. The positive thinking comes after your plan is in place.

My hope is that my series has shown the Kamba people where they are and now we have to find a way forward and out of our misery. Already it is clear that the Kamba tend to do very well far from home. Many agree also that they are very creative fellows. But on the political front they have done very poorly. Their leaders have failed to unite so as to negotiate and fight for a better life for their people. And neither has the lone ranger approach worked as stubs for the presidency by leaders from Ukambani like Charity Ngilu and Kalonzo Musyoka have yielded very little to show. Before them Paul Ngei’s repeated claim that he was the king of Ukambani did not add any isyo (Kamba staple of maize and beans) into the people’s plates.

But even before that there was the renowned ruler and medicine woman Syokimau who correctly predicted the coming of the white man. She did not try to unite the Kamba to face this coming threat. And that is one other thing about us, we love to have our predictions proved right but are hardly proactive in suggesting remedies and solutions that will come in handy in dealing with the problems we see coming. You would think after the biting famine that kept on sweeping across Ukambani for centuries, somebody would have come up with an attempted remedy of at least preparing for them. It never happened.

At the moment Kalonzo Musyoka is the leading political figure from the region who is very much interested in the presidency in 2012. Mr Musyoka needs to ask himself if his community is fully behind his bid for the presidency. Secondly he needs to put his house in order before he seeks national leadership. What kind of man leaves sufurias flying in his poverty stricken home to go to the village to seek to be chief of the entire community? While doing that he needs to appreciate the fact that things have hanged dramatically on the ground. More and more members of the community are looking at other more united communities and asking themselves why not us? Chances are that if he does not quickly reposition himself he will find that events have conspired to make him completely irrelevant in 2012 politics. It matters little that he is currently the vice president. Remember vice president Moody Awori?

Charity Ngilu has already etched her name boldly in the history of the country and can beat Musyoka easily in any political contest that is limited to Ukambani. But now at the twilight of her political career Madame Ngilu needs to sekk to make a different kind of history, Namely helping find the lost key that will unlock the Akamba people and their virgin potential.

But if you want to believe that Syokimau was right in most of her predictions then keep your eyes on a miracle of sorts in the not too distant future that will put a Kamba in State house. That’s right, she predicted that a great leader from Ukambani would make their mark nationally, after Kenyatta and Moi meaning that the day cannot be too far off.

Many thanks for reading and commenting on this series. This is my last post and I hope that it will stri up things enough to bring about much needed change in Ukambani.

Previous articles in this series:

Part 1: What future for sleepy Kenyan community?

Part 2: What is the true origin of all the suffering?

Part 3: Dangerous votes from Ukambani

Part 4: Terrible crab mentality that rules the Kamba

Part 5: Kamba athleticism and other deadly talents

Part 6: Kamba constituency that is very different from the rest

Part 7: Predictions of a coming Kamba president?

Kamba constituency that is different from the others

The most fascinating tale my dad has ever told me is the one about his trip to Nairobi from Machakos on foot through the bushes, sometimes in the dark. It happened around 1943 or thereabouts and my father was barely 5 years old.

A section of the crowd during the historic promulgation of the new constitution 27th August 2010

His uncle was carrying some tobacco from his small shamba to sell in Nairobi and the environs. It took them about two days to get to Nairobi. On their way back they were “loaded” with cash and so they took a bus. The highlights of that trip was that he saw a car for the very first time in his life and children back in the village could not get enough of that story months and years later.

The point is that the Akamba people pioneered in many things and started traveling far and wide very early on. They were mostly traders and sometimes sold the produce of their farms when famine did not hit. If other communities had gotten the kind of opportunities they got, there is no doubt that they would have utilized them and gotten very far.

Indeed the Kamba started getting a reputation of “not being ambitious”. They would dutifully work for an Asian for decades without it ever crossing their minds that they could duplicate the business and set up their own. The only kind of business that seems to be populated by many from Ukambani is the one of selling car tyres. Don’t ask me why because I have no idea.

The Kambas were trusted in the military because they would never dream of being disloyal let alone overthrow the government.

Sadly it is also true to say that one of the reasons why many Kambas are terrified about progress is because of the fear of being bewitched by jealous friends and relatives. In other instances they are actually bewitched or seem to believe that they have been bewitched and that is the end of the road for them. In other instances the crab mentality creeps in and a fellow Kamba works hard towards their downfall which then becomes inevitable.

This is an attitude that will have to be tackled head on by the new governors who will have jurisdiction over counties in Ukambani. The big challenge is finding ways and means to overcome this mindset and to encourage people to work and exercise their talents.

There is no doubt that the Kamba are generally very talented people and anybody who unlocks their potential will be utterly amazed.

So what is the way forward? How can the Kamba break from the terrible bondage of the past into a glorious new future?

Sadly as the voting patterns from the referendum proved this will be very difficult in the foreseeable future. Cheque book politics, it seems, will continue to rule in most of Ukambani.

Still there is a little light at the end of the tunnel. From progressive constituencies like Kangundo (where Johnsone Muthama is MP). Many who have visited the place for the first time have quickly said that they did NOT believe that they were in Ukambani. It does not look like Ukambani they have emphasized. Interestingly this is the same constituency that was ruled with an iron hand by one Paul Ngei for years.

You will find plenty of cash crops and development in Kangundo and you will notice a lot of stone houses as opposed to grass thatched huts with “extreme poverty” written all over them.

Constituencies like Kangundo give me a lot of encouragement that Ukambani can change for the better.

See interesting tale about how Paul Ngei's friendship with Kenyatta enabled him to get away with test-driving a Mercedes Benz for 20 years.

Previous articles in this series:

Part 1: What future for sleepy Kenyan community?

Part 2: What is the true origin of all the suffering?

Part 3: Dangerous votes from Ukambani

Part 4: Terrible crab mentality that rules the Kamba

Part 5: Kamba athleticism and other deadly talents

Part 6: Kamba constituency that is very different from the rest

Part 7: Predictions of a coming Kamba president?

Month of disasters turned into month of miracles

August has usually meant disaster for Kenyans. Even on a personal level my own mother suddenly and very unexpectedly passed on August 20th. One evening she was there and a few hours later she was gone. Founding father and first president of Kenya Jomo “land grabber” Kenyattta died August 22 1978. The list of disasters in the month of August for Kenyans is pretty long and includes the American embassy bombing in Nairobi in August 7th 1998 and the death of former Vice President Kijana Wamalwa on 23rd August 2003.

But this August 2010 was very different. Mighty different!!

I will continue with images from Kenya's KATIBA day in August over the next few days: Here the PM takes the oath of office.

Powerful forces behind the scenes including the president’s own close advisors not to mention his intelligence boys were very much against Kenyans getting a new constitution. Hopefully one day Kenyans will get to hear of at least a fraction of the things that went on behind the scenes to frustrate things. But historians will record that in the month of August 2010 miracles happened and Kenyans got a wonderful new constitution, in my view the best in Africa.

By some miracles one Mwai Kibaki who has never been enthusiastic and passionate about anything in his life (even the political fight of his life in 2007) was suddenly deeply passionate about Kenyans passing a new constitution and criss-crossed many different parts of the country campaigning like some youngster rookie president.

As the miracle month approached the end with the many wonderful things that happened, and as most Kenyans pinched themselves to confirm that it was all real and happening, yet another miracle was dropped on their laps. Folks went to bed paying about Kshs 7 per minute for their calls even as the leading mobile phone service in the country was still able to declare obscene profits in the region of 20.9 billion. The next August morning Kenya suddenly woke up to Kshs 3 per minute to all networks and short text messages to all networks was at a mere shilling. Zain the company that introduced these rates told Kenyans that this was NOT an offer but a more permanent rate structure. As you read this Kenyans are paying as little as 2 shillings for Safaricom to Safaricom calls (which is an offer as the company thinks of what else to do to keep its’ obscene profits).


Why the number of Somalis in Kenya exploded
By Guest writer

Early this year, rumours had it that the number of Somalis in Kenya have increased substantially. And that the results for the census that was carried last year were cancelled because of this. Actually, this story appeared in one of the tabloids in Kenya - The Star. Now, the results are out; Oparanya officially announced the Kenya Census 2009 results on 31st August, 2010.

Seems like they are not rumours anymore; the population of Somalis in Kenya which was just under a million in 1999 has more than doubled in just a decade and now stands at about 2.4 million. Is that possible? Yes and no. The new figures for the Somalis would not be possible if you base your analysis on natural growth alone, i.e. the net difference between births and deaths. But, there are many ‘non-natural’ reasons that could increase the population of a community.

Thus the question here is; what could have caused the exponential growth of the Somalis in Kenya? In my opinion there are many reasons underlying this seemingly doubtful growth rate that have nothing to do with immigration. And that the growth rate in essence could be a true reflection of the Somali population in Kenya. Therefore, these reasons include, but are not limited to, the following; changes in method of data collection and analysis, and changes in the pattern of intra-country migration – notably from nomadic to sedentary lifestyles. Other reasons could include inaccuracies, either deliberate or accidental, in the base population from which we found our previous assumptions. If, for example, the earlier census was not properly conducted or the results intentionally distorted, both of these would have an effect on the validity of our base population i.e. 1989, 1999 etc.

I know for sure the method of calculating Somalis in Kenya has changed. This, by sheer happenstance, I came to learn while a student at a certain college in Nairobi when we were given some assignments part of which entailed getting some figures from the census book. A friend of mine, he was a Turkana, decided for some reasons to compare the Somali population in Kenya to his community’s. He was shocked when he realized that the Somalis were indeed much fewer than the Turkanas. When I went back to the library with him, I was stunned too. The Somalis were divided into clans and each clan listed separately. Only a tiny minority were listed as Somalis. I later explained to my friend that the Degodias, Gurres, Ajurans and Ogadens he was seeing were actually Somali clans and not some distinct communities.

Why they decided to enumerate the Somalis in that manner is something that I have never understood. Now, if indeed the ‘Somali’ population, as listed in the 1989 census, was much lower than the Turkanas in Kenya, would the KNBS also be basing their analysis on inaccurate figures? Wasn’t it also easy for the guys behind these evil machinations to push the figures for the Somalis downwards? I have this feeling they not only could do that but they did. Why they did it is something that we would probably need to ponder on, for a long time to come.

Secondly, the Somalis in Kenya are predominantly nomads. We also know that the region mostly inhabited by these people has suffered from perennial drought and famine. This, I know for a fact, pushed many nomads to a sedentary lifestyle. Some of my relatives currently living in Garissa can attest to that. Also, it is only possible for government officials to enumerate settled residents. I thus, do not believe that the census clerks can exhaustively count nomadic tribesmen wandering in the expansive arid northeast, especially, when the census exercise is carried within a relatively short period of time. Therefore, the fact that many people now live in the urban centres in North-Eastern would definitely affect the number of Kenyan Somalis and of course push their numbers upwards.

Thirdly, and slightly related to the previous point is that the enumerators could have done a brilliant job this time round. I have a feeling that with each subsequent census the sophistication of the whole exercise improves. And this would have a positive effect on the census. Therefore, this would most likely increase the population of a community and in this case the Somalis who usually were not counted would effectively be captured by the census clerks.

Fourthly, I have this feeling that someone somewhere has some vendetta against the Somalis. I say this because it was only early this year when we heard that there would be some audit of Somali owned properties in the city. I am convinced that someone, reeling from the failure of the anti terrorism bill fail to go through, wants to pass the same through the backdoor. Thus as Kenyans we need to be careful about this shadowy figures.

Conversely, the argument that immigration, too, has something to do with the increase of the Somalis could be true. And, in the case that this is true then the government should be held responsible for that. How, for example, should Kenyan Somalis be held accountable for the corruption condoned by the government? If any non Kenyan Somali has illegally obtained Kenyan citizenship then I doubt whether their accumulated numbers could exceed a few thousands. Thus, I doubt this last point could substantially increase the number of Somalis.
Lastly, most of the above would also be true for the Turkanas whose numbers have also been questioned. Or, is this some clever way of justifying the imminent downward revision of the number of Somalis in Kenya? By making it appear as though it’s not just Kenyan Somalis they have a problem with? Anyway, I pray that sooner rather than later we will come to bottom of all this.

Question for Kumekucha readers to ponder:
Recent developments point to increased pressures to charge for quality content on the web and even at times on TV where it has mostly been free. And so is the future in TV services like DirectTV in the Americas Caribbean etc. and DSTV closer to home? What are your views? Would love some feedback in the comments area below.

Nyanza To Be Double Taxed Under The New Constitution

By Mwarang'ethe

On 27th August, 2010, the day Kenyans promulgated a “new constitution,” the Kenyan Prime Minister, Raila Odinga told us that, in accordance with the best constitutional experts, we are “Free at last, from the tyranny of the State,” as we read here. On his part, the President, Mwai Kibaki told us that, “It’s a new dawn for Kenya, and we deserve to celebrate,” as we read here:

To reinforce this wonderful message, Julius Kipng’etich, he of the KWS, told us jubilantly this: “Ready for takeoff: Finally, Kenya has a blueprint to be an economic powerhouse,” like Singapore, Honk Kong and Botswana as we read here:

On our part, we declare that, to rely on so called constitutional law experts to draft a constitution was a terrible mistake. What we needed are men and women well versed with Ancient, Middle Ages and Modern history (history of rise and decay of civilizations), economics (history of economic ideas), philosophy (moral philosophy) and sociology. With such people, we would only need a single lawyer, who need not call himself pompous names such a constitutional law expert, for his job will be that of a mere draftsman. This is a heavy charge against eminent lawyers like Ghai and Nzamba Kitonga. However, we shall support it by demonstrating how Nyanza, a region that has suffered terrible economic injustice in the past will now be double taxed under this wonderful “new constitution ” of theirs.

On 31st May, 2010, the DN reported this: “Fishermen on Lake Victoria to pay fee.” See here . Among other stuff, we read this: Fishermen on Lake Victoria will soon start paying fees to be allowed to ply their trade on the water body. This is one of the ways that a joint fisheries ministers meeting between the three countries using the lake came up with as a source of funding. It is among a raft of measures aimed at raising money to run affairs of the sector. Also, “All countries must ensure that the landing site user fee is legislated as a funding mechanism for Beach Management Unit.”

By introducing land rent on the Nyanza fishermen, the Kenyan government is telling them this. No other Kenyan will pay taxes to maintain the lake. All the revenue to maintain the lake must therefore, come from those who benefit from resources provided by Nature. This is the way forward, and we fully support this proposal. Our proposal along these lines can be read under “Proposed Constitution: Land Question Mishandled ". However, note this very carefully. In addition to this land rent, the poor Nyanza fishermen will also pay other taxes such as VAT when they buy necessities of life like salt and sugar.

If the poor fishermen from Nyanza must exclusively pay to maintain “their” lake, how do we propose to treat those others who “fish” in waters called Nairobi, Thika road or Machakos etc? The answer is here. On 7th July, 2010, inquiring mind read this in the Standard: “Speculators anxious over Machakos land”.

Among other stuff, inquiring minds read this. A certain bare land in Machakos “turned into a fruitful vine overnight after the State made its intentions public on the development akin to California’s Silicon Valley.” In other words, when the State, whose tyranny we are told is over by Raila Odinga announced the INTENTION to build some infrastructure funded by the VAT paid by the poor fisherman from Nyanza, a lot of “investors” rushed to buy land to “secure vantage positions ahead of the technopolis."

Why are they doing this? Simple, "People who bought an acre at Sh300, 000 and less five months ago sold it at Sh800, 000 within a month." Simply, within a month, these so called investors pocketed Sh500, 000 while doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. So, who has made these millionaires and billionaire? The poor fishermen in Nyanza who must pay VAT, income tax to the Kenyan government so as to build the infrastructure which raises the value of the land for the FEW who are strategically placed. If you do not call this tyranny and ROBERY, then, we would like hear what you call it. Simply, ROBBERY just like that of a common thug with an AK 47, but, this time without guilt feelings because you can hide behind a fiction called State.

There have been endless talks about wealth gap between the Nyanza fishermen and “investors” such as the ones we read about here. Herein, we demonstrate the SOURCE. So, how do solve the problem? Extremely simple. Require those who “fish” in Nairobi, Machakos, Thika road etc to EXCLUSIVELY pay for the privilege of “fishing” in such rich waters. In other words, STOP ROBBING the poor Nyanza fishermen via VAT etc, and require those who occupy Muthaiga, Karen, Thika road, Kiambu, Machakos to pay for the police, roads, and sewage.

Where will they get the money from? Only a constitutional lawyer cannot see what a fool can see. Take the sh500, 000 as an example for all the land surrounding the technopolis and fund the common infrastructure therein. If these so called “investors” (gamblers) want to get rich, we are very happy with that, but, let them develop the land and build factories so as to create real wealth if they are men and women of substance. Even better, we will leave them to pocket all the gains once they pay land values.

There are those like Phil, Chris, and Philip who have asserted that, we are utopian. Fine. We ask why is it utopian when we demand that, those who occupy land in Nairobi be treated in the same manner as we propose to treat the poor fishermen in Nyanza? In all honesty, we have demanded what is just in law and equity. This is so because; we have demanded what is right before God and Man.

Let the useless land speculators who unlike the Nyanza fishermen who give us food relinquish land values created by poor fishermen from Nyanza so as to fund the necessary infrastructure. So, implemented, we would relieve the long suffering fishermen from this state sanctioned tyranny and robbery? This is the SIMPLE formula for liberty and wealth creation.

However, instead of such a simple formula, Kenyans have come up with complicated nonsense to hide their naked formulas of oppression. We denounce these complicated formulas for what they are. The shameless shifting of the man’s curse that; he shall eat bread from the sweat of his brow, to the shoulders of his helpless brother. We therefore, violate both Divine and Natural laws for we build a nation in total disregard of true nature of both physical and moral nature of man. Nothing built upon such rotten foundation can stand. A heavy price shall be paid for this attempted impunity.

Many conclusions flow from above observations. Firstly, the failure to adhere to what we have said has brought about so called welfare state. However, anyone versed with the history of this stupidity from the Roman times, knows where all is going to end up. Even worse, when we refuse to take what is social wealth by privatising it, we drive the land prices up through speculation which eats all our bank credit as they try to grab a piece of the free lunch instead of funding real wealth creation.

The consequences for this are very grave for we squeeze industrial capitalist’s profits and thereby, wages for the labour. How we intend to industrialise a nation of low profits and low wages is unknown to us. In other words, we have squandered the greatest opportunity to lay a firm and just foundation for industrializing our nation so as to remove want among our people.

Some will tell us about the land commission that is forthcoming. Well, our answer is that, we have seen this movie many times in history and we are pretty sure what is going to happen. For instance, the “new constitution” talks about limiting the size of land. As the Machakos story educates us, it is not size that matters, it is three things. Location, location and location.

How your county government will transform Kenyan politics

I missed the Katiba celebrations because I came down with something quite serious on Friday night. Am still resting but mercifully the worst is now over. I guess we shall have to continue my weekend special on the Kamba people next weekend.

There are many things in Kenya which are going to change enormously after the events of last Friday. In fact right now my big worry is if Kenyans can handle change on such a massive scale and at such speed. The human mind and body is designed to take in change much more gradually. But alas this is what tends to happen when a people get so totally fed up with the old order of things. They reach a place where they just want out and have no time to stop and ask themselves if they can handle the change they seek.
Many political commentators agree that they have never seen the president so passionate about something (like he has been about the new constitution) and they have never seen him so happy about something (like he was in the picture after signing the new constitution into law). The fact that Kibaki delivered the new constitution has rescued his legacy rather dramatically. Lucky man!!

But for the purposes of this post let me focus on the change in our politics that the new constitution will usher in. Do you know the most powerful political seat, indeed more powerful than the presidency in our new constitution? I am of course talking about the Governor of a county. For instance the president’s appointments will have to be approved by parliament but the governors will NOT. I mean this man or woman will have such power in the county that even retired President Moi who was a god in his time, will envy.

What all this means is that the public will lose interest in National politics. It will all be happening in the counties where decisions will be made every day that will impact very dramatically and quickly on the people’s lives.

I keep wondering about how the media will adjust. The media in Kenya has gone through many changes in the recent past and now comes this most dramatic and far-reaching one of a new constitution with new demands. I see media houses like Royal Media services having a head start over other media houses since they have such a large stable of FM radio stations covering many different regions of the country. There will be great need for media at the counties and I would expect the FM stations to be the initial major form of communication at this level. There will also be opportunities for quick thinking entrepreneurs to find a way to make low circulating newspapers work. Some prosperous counties may even be able to sustain their own TV stations. Indeed even Kumekucha has to re-invent itself to fit snugly into the new Kenya and I am still thinking about that very deeply and will appreciate suggestions from my usually quick-witted readers here.

There have been fears amongst some old school Kenyans who will always want to believe that nothing but the old systems can work in Kenya, to the effect that counties will promote tribalism. Admittedly a few short-sighted governors may want to promote negative ethnicity at the beginning but they will soon find that their counties are lagging behind. The bottom line will be to promote the prosperity of one’s county at all costs and the way to do this is to co-operate with other counties while encouraging a rapid influx of investors from other counties. Smart governors will seek to find what resources and talents their areas of jurisdiction can best exploit because the truth is that nobody can be good at everything. So it is unlikely that any county will be self sufficient in everything.

True entrepreneurs should now be rubbing their hands in glee waiting for the full implementation of the new constitution. This is because there will be massive new opportunities at the county level for all kinds of things. For starters basic essential services like water and electricity are going to be in very high demand and so companies that deal in solar energy, water tanks and other basics should be positioning themselves to sell proposals to respective counties. Entrepreneurs prosper while solving people’s problems and so enterprising companies will now have to take a serious look at the problems in counties and how their products and services can help solve them.

And that brings me to the most important change in politics that counties will bring. The focus will shift from individuals to issues. Until now our politics has always been about personalities whilst real issues have mostly been ignored.

I dare say that what I love most about this new order of things is that silly tribal comments like Kikuyu this and Raila that will lose all meaning even in a blog like this one. That will be the day!!!

This is it!!

New constitution signed into law. Gloomy weather ushers in new dawn but Kenyans still very excited



Contrary to what some people may want to think weather is significant and has many times through history signified the times and what is about to come.

On this day August the 27th the year of our Lord two thousand and ten the day of the birth of the new republic of Kenya in many parts of the country it is raining, including around the largest gateway into the republic of Kenya, Mombasa port. That is a sure sign of blessing according to the African culture. Indeed many times when important historical events that have brought about great positive changes have happened, the weather has been cloudy, almost gloomy, just the way it is right now in Nairobi where it is all happening. For instance July 4, 1776 the day the American declaration of independence was ratified the weather was cloudy and deteriorated into dark and gloomy by afternoon. What happened on that day was not normal by any means. It shook, and still shakes the world today!

The mammoth crowd at Uhuru Park are in very high spirits and are completely unfazed by the weather knowing fully well the significance of the day that they are witnessing. How many Americans witnessed July 4th 1776 and how many other times will it happen in history again?

I was moved to tears by the first song the Kenya Army played as President Kibaki inspected a guard of honour on arrival at Uhuru Park a few moments ago. It is an old song first released by the Kenya police band shortly after independence. It is a Swahili song and I will translate some of the words in the song that moved me to tears;

“Walk on the ground that is your country with pride and without fear. That is the assurance that we have received from the president. After the exit of the colonialist happy times are here.”

Kenyans quickly realized that it was all a mirage. Thye had simply exchanged colonial masters from a white man (who was in many ways fairer) to a small clique of Africans who ruled ruthlessly and with an iron hand. Anybody who tried to resist or challenge the authority of the new masters was put to death. Indeed even those whom it was suspected may want to resist in the near future lost their lives. Pio Gama Pinto, Tom Mboya, JM Kariuki, Kungu Karumba and many others fell. May their sould rest in peace.

And so finally 46 years later, Kenyans are now ushering in what they thought they had in 1963.

So the choice of song was extremely appropriate.

I am staying online and live and will post regular updates either as comments or complete posts.

It is raining cats and dogs in the part of Kenya where I am right now. Wonderful!!! I have a very good feeling about this new constitution and what it will help us to do for our beloved motherland.

As I post this the President has just signed the new constitution!!! 6 copies in all!!!

WOW!!!!

Update
Kenya's new constitution is written with the blood of these brave Kenyans who dared to dream of a better tomorrow for the motherland;

Josiah Mwangi Kariuki (March 21, 1929–March 2, 1975) was a Kenyan socialist politician during the administration of the Jomo Kenyatta government. He held different government positions from 1963, when Kenya became an independent country, to 1975, when he was assassinated. He left behind three wives and many children. He is the Kenyan who famously quipped "I don't want to be in a Kenya with 10 millionaires and 10 million beggars." A remark that greatly irked the Kneyatta administration. JM was so brutually murdered that parts of his body were dismemembered including his private parts. Nobody has ever been convicted for this heinous crime. JM Kariuki is amongst the Kenyans whose blood went into writing our new constitution.

I will highlight other great Kenyans in this series in the days to come.

Amkeni, Kumekucha

I have to pinch myself now and then to make sure that I am not dreaming and that all this is for real. That our beloved motherland Kenya is actually about to get a new constitution that will usher in the most sweeping changes ever. Changes that will impact the long suffering ordinary folks.

There are many times in the past when I have been ashamed of being a Kenyan. This is definitely NOT one of those times. I am so proud for our country and the new beginning that will commence in just a matter of hours.

But once again I would like to remind all my fellow Kenyan brothers and sisters that after tomorrow we will have some very heavy responsibility on our shoulders. We must try very hard NOT to let the motherland and future generations down.

You see contrary to 1963 when power was handed over to Jomo Kenyatta, tomorrow when president Kibaki signs the new constitution into law, he will be handing over power to the people of Kenya. Folks we will need to make some very important decisions over the next few months and years. I am sure we are up to it, contrary to what Moi and company may think.

But even as we celebrate let us spare a moment to think of all those Kenyans who never made it thus far. Those who died in sheer frustration and hopelessness not believing that it was possible to birth a new Kenya. Guys this document like all other great constitutions is written in blood. Never forget that!!

I also take this opportunity to thank all you Kenyans who contributed in one way or another in pushing for changes through this small humble blog. We played our small part and it was a team effort all the way because what would I have done alone? KUDOS.

Amkeni KUMEKUCHA…

…But even as we celebrate this new day remember that it is only the beginning of the day and we have long hours of hard work ahead of us. But I am confident that together we shall conquer, we shall make good, we shall create a new nation that we can all be very proud of.

Terrible crab mentality that rules the Kamba people

If there is one single thing that rules the Kamba most and everything they do including in politics, then it has to be the crab mentality. What is the crab mentality?

If you have caught crabs then you know that once you have caught at least two then you needn’t worry about them escaping. This is because they will always prevent each other from getting out first. Wikipedia puts it very well thus;

“Crab mentality, sometimes referred to as crabs in the bucket, describes a way of thinking best described by the phrase "if I can't have it, neither should you." The metaphor refers to a pot of crabs. Singly, the crabs could easily escape from the pot, but instead, they grab at each other in a useless "king of the hill" competition which prevents any from escaping and ensures their collective demise. The analogy in human behavior is that of a group that will attempt to "pull down" (negate or diminish the importance of) any member who achieves success beyond the others, out of jealousy or competitive feelings.
This term is broadly associated with short-sighted, non-constructive thinking rather than a unified, long-term, constructive mentality. It is also often used colloquially in reference to individuals or communities attempting to "escape" a so-called "underprivileged life", but kept from doing so by others attempting to ride upon their coat-tails or those who simply resent their success…”

Historically Kamba leaders have always been extremely jealous of each other and have gone to great lengths to finish each other, using all kinds of ploys and even witchcraft. Any half intelligent observer would wonder why the community has never realized that supporting each other would be much more beneficial to all.

Paul Ngei a prominent politician from Ukambani in his day was arch rivals with Mulu Mutisya another prominent politician in the area at around the same time. The differences between the two got so serious that they physically fought on several occasions. Today the rivalry between Charity Ngilu and Kalonzo Musyoka is legendary and all efforts to unite the two have come to naught. Interestingly both were in the YES camp in the recently concluded referendum and yet clearly the two were extremely uncomfortable in each others company during the major rallies and meetings where they had to share the same platform. I am willing to bet you any amount that the two never share a seat close to each other during cabinet meetings.

This inexplicable rivalry and crab mentality spreads well beyond politics into the business world. I have been in numerous situations where things have changed dramatically with another Kamba immediately they realize that I too have some Kamba blood in me.

Indeed this is one of the reasons why Machakos town (the first inland capital of the British protectorate that became Kenya) has remained very much behind in development. Kambas would rather an outsider comes into the city and prospers in business rather than one of their own. In fact there are numerous cases where many have gone to great lengths to ensure that one of their own does not prosper.

This is very sad and something that the Kamba community needs to find a way of facing and eradicting if they are to benefit from the coming political dispensdation and the numerous opportunities that will come with it.

Read this bizarre Kumekucha post about Witchcraft and C-files episode In Kenyan President's Office that further illustrates the Kamba way of doing things.

This Weekend special continues next weekend. Until then I will welcome ideas, suggestions criticisms etc. anything to improve my earth-shattering conclusion of this series.

Previous articles in this series:

Part 1: What future for sleepy Kenyan community?

Part 2: What is the true origin of all the suffering?

Part 3: Dangerous votes from Ukambani

Part 4: Terrible crab mentality that rules the Kamba

Part 5: Kamba athleticism and other deadly talents

Part 6: Kamba constituency that is very different from the rest

Part 7: Predictions of a coming Kamba president?

Kamba athletism and other deadly talents

Kamba women have a hell of a reputation in bed. And so do the men. Queens and kings of the bedroom.

I can already hear some of my more conservative readers asking what sex has to do with politics. Actually being sex athletes has a lot to do with siasa because students of history will tell you that sex has changed the course of history too many times for anybody to keep count.

Some people believe that this reputation is overblown beyond all proportions. However the reality is that there are many brothels where regulars specifically ask for Kamba women and will settle for nothing less. Any survey will quickly reveal that this is a reputation that will not fade anytime soon amongst most Kenyans from diverse communities.

Sadly there are a lot of things I cannot say even in this blog, but let me just mention in passing that some Kamba women legislators have left their unforgettable mark in the beds and minds of some major male political players in the country after a brief roll in the hay.

Even without make-up and city sophistication, Kamba women are obviously very beautiful.

Let me also admit that for years I have tried in vain to get to the bottom of what is behind this Kamba prowess in bed. I have heard many ridiculous theories but I have never come across any concrete-sounding reason why members of this tribe are without doubt such talented naturals between the sheets. One such ridiculous theory is based on the fact that the Kamba are one of the very few communities that were led successfully by women in the days of old. (One such famed woman leader of the community was Syokimau who was also a powerful medicinewoman who predicted many things.) The absurd theory claims that since women were the leaders and Kings with powers to put men to death if they did not please them in bed, Kamba men had to learn the art of pleasing a woman for their very survival.

But there is something else about the Kamba women that nobody talks about. Woe unto you if a fair Kamba lass spots you and realizes that you are wealthy (according to her standards) and it does not matter whether you are already married or not. What they will do next is to rush to a witchdoctor to cast a spell on you so that you find her irresistible. Be very wary if your new Kamba girlfriend wants to take too many photographs of you. I know of one case where the impoverished parents of this beautiful Kamba lass instructed her to send them the photograph of any rich man she came across and fancied (preferably a mzungu because they are supposedly the wealthiest) and they would do the rest to make sure that the man was his. And this is not an exceptional case. Many families in this region have used charms rather than genuine bedroom skills to get their families out of poverty. Many poeople don't believe that you can cast a spell on somebody so what has happened is the Kamba reputation in the bedroom has continued to grow in leaps and bounds, even where charms have been used.

Some men from this community have also used the same methods to ensure that they get the woman that they want. Many times a simple handshake shortly after some visit to some Juju-man is enough to make a respectable level-headed woman start constantly following a man like some dog on heat.

Indeed for this community sex and witchcraft is difficult to separate. There have even been countless cases where men have “protected” their wives from having extra-marital affairs by casting a spell on them so that if they sleep with any other man they will get stuck and will be inseparable in the act until the man returns and is appeased enough "to separate" them.

In a recent famous case that happened in the Muthurwa area in Nairobi, a junior Kamba police officer acted on rumours that finally reached his ears about his wife and his boss. Read the entire sordid tale HERE. Cases like this have been countless over the years.

I have no doubt that many will read this post and get very angry which is hardly surprising because the truth can sometimes hurt very badly. It is a clear sign that it is the truth. Most humans find it very difficult to face the truth, let alone handle it.

P.S. Safaricom has quietly started responding to the biggest threat ever to its’ dominance of the Kenyan mobile telephony industry. And the approach is rather uncharacteristically meek. Subscribers yet to register for Mpesa are quietly being urged via SMS to do so before the end of the month and they will have a chance to win upto Kshs 250 in air time. About Kshs 10 million in free airtime is up for grabs, the SMS advertisement from Safaricom says.

It seems that Michael Joseph’s strategy for now is to lie low and make his moves quietly while avoiding the limelight at all costs. Clearly the last thing he wants is to be drawn into a fierce price war he knows will be difficult for him to win considering the setup at Safaricom with shareholders expecting bigger dividends all the time. The move to maintain and increase Mpesa subscribers is smart because clearly there is still a lot of room for increased revenues and profits in this innovative service. Besides Mpesa subscribers usually have to make a call at some point to confirm receipt of funds or to inform that funds have been sent.

Meanwhile I have received information from my informants countrywide to the effect that Zain sim cards are selling feverishly in many parts of the country, a sharp contrast from the indifference many Kenyans have been showing Kenya’s second largest mobile phone operator only recently. Clearly Safaricom are in serious trouble and it is unlikely that they will be able to maintain the complete dominance they have enjoyed in the Kenyan market for so long.

Kamba Secrets Part 1

Kamba Secrets Part 2

Kamba Secrets Part 3

Kamba Secrets Part 4