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Saturday, March 28, 2009

Raila Says You Can Be Half Pregnant

I have just had more than enough of Prime Minister Raila Odinga. His press conference yesterday (to say absolutely nothing) was the climax for me (by the way he told us people would be fired, what the hell happened? Ama they have paid him to retain their cabinet posts?). I have now had more than enough from the Langata legislators lies and games. How much longer will Kenyans be cheated?

The thing about him that irritates me most is this silly excuse he keeps repeating like a mantra, that the Grand coalition government has not yet had a scandal as big as the Anglo Leasing one.

Huh!! (exercising great restraint not to say certain uncouth things).

What about the maize scam where maize was sold outside the country and now Kenyans are losing their lives from starvation as a result of that. In my book corruption that results in Kenyans dying is much bigger than Angle Leasing.

But let us for a moment pretend to believe that what Raila is saying is true. Is there such a thing as being half pregnant? If this is true then there is such a thing as being less corrupt. You are either a corrupt government or a clean one. You are either pregnant or NOT pregnant. You can surely not be less pregnant than the next woman can you be?

I voted for Raila in 2007 (with all my heart) and today I regret that action with all my heart. You see Kenyans believe in this silly principal that one should not waste their vote on a losing candidate. I beg to disagree. I would be much more comfortable today knowing what I know about raila had I voted for some of the lesser candidates. Even Kenneth Matiba. Or if there was nobody to vote for I would have been better off not wasting my time showing up to cast my vote.

Mr Prime Minister, do the honorable thing and fire yourself after apologising to Kenyans for taking us on a ride that cost thousand of precious Kenyan lives. Mwai Kibaki is no angel but at least he is NOT a pretender.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Raila: Honest Audit or Smart Blame Game?


Prime Minister Raila Odinga has given out what amounts to an audit of the GCG to date. At the centre of his audit was corruption, the cancer that is mauling at every fabric of garment Kenya.

It must be the most difficult and helpless job being a GENERAL in an army of hostile soldiers. Supervision and coordination may sound rosy on paper but just ask iron lady Martha Karua about cronyism and DNA-based appointments in the judiciary. Her political tantrums aside, it took real politics for her absorb the impact of kick in the teeth from an appreciative king after being the intellectual and political face of PNU during the trying PEV period.

In defending the UNHOLY political union of power-sharing, Raila squarely placed the blamed on corruption to inaction and lethargy by the judiciary and police. And that opens the door on the debate of whether he is telling nothing but the WHOLE TRUTH or simply shifting blame as the GCG dithers with snouts fully immersed in the honey jar.

Raila acknowledged the difficult task of undoing the myriad of ills inflicted on Kenya and Kenyans over the past 45 years. And in there lies the truth and the common thread joining the present gate keepers at the hip.

On a brighter side, at least we have been presented with a formal audit to debate about on Kenya and NOT bedroom matters that are shamelessly nationalized. That said, the will to fight corruption may be there but the courage from the right quarters lacking in abundance. Speak of the mind willing but the hands are weak.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Kibaki Rules Out Elections Before 2012: Is He Wrong Yet Again?


How will history judge Emilio Stanley Mwai Kibaki's presidency?

President Mwai Kibaki has ruled out the possibility of any elections being held in Kenya before 2012. Read the full report of what he said HERE.

The president has been wrong before. Terribly wrong at times, and sometimes with grave consequences. For example he was wrong about Kenyans taking the election theft lying down and was sure if a few of them got shot dead by police everybody would come back in line and accept the only election results he himself could live with.

He was wrong again about being able to form a non-coalition government. In fact he instructed his ministers to tell the press that folks who had come to help negotiate peace like Bishop Desmond Tutu and then Ghanaian President John Kufuor were in town for a cup of tea. He was wrong about that one too.

However the most dangerous thing the president is wrong about is the mood of Kenyans right now. He does not seem to realize just how fed up Kenyans are with the grand coalition government, especially now when there is so much hunger all over the country. As I have said before you can do many things to people without trouble as long as they have food in their belly. However the moment folks start going hungry everything changes. Ask the King of France shortly before the French Revolution started. Interestingly this is something that used to scare former President Moi a lot. Kibaki on the other hand is a completely different kettle of fish. Nothing moves him and he cares about nothing.

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And of course President Kibaki would not like any elections to take place in Kenya before 2012. That will not be in his personal interest, will it? You see in Kenya politicians NEVER do things for the good of the country.

There is little doubt that history will be much kinder to former President Daniel arap Moi’s tenure than it will be to Mwai Kibaki’s presidency. There is little doubt that he will be remembered as the President who pushed Kenyans to the brink of a terrible abyss. The man under whose watch the cancer of tribalism thrived to it’s very apex and maybe slightly beyond.

I will publish a special edition of Kumekucha Confidential tomorrow with shocking new details of the latest Visa ban move the Americans are set to make soon, this time against individuals in Kenya’s corporate sector. Two well known corporate chiefs in Kenya will soon not be able to travel to the US on business. The Confidential is FREE if you are not a subscriber yet, subscribe now by sending an email to; kumekucha-subscribe@yahoogroups.com


Tuesday, March 24, 2009

It’s Ruto… No It’s Kulei. Oops Or Is It Ruto?

It has never happened before and I was totally shocked. Usually this informant gives me A1 information in terms of reliability. In fact the problem with most of the info they give me is that it is too hot to use (sometimes even in my raw notes). But this time round they came back a few days after telling me Ruto was the Visa ban minister to tell me that it was NOT Ruto after all. The name they gave me confused me.

The US envoy had said that the banned person was a senior member of government. The last time I checked Joshua Kulei was NOT a member of the Kibaki administration. My source however assured me that Ruto was next on the dreaded list and as a matter of fact it is highly unlikely that he could ever be granted a visa incase he wants to travel to the United States.

So I made a decision to keep quiet until something happens. Well it happened last night when the Americans told us that the banned person they were referring to was in fact Kulei. Now this is really fascinating stuff because Mr Kulei is a very major investor in the American economy. In fact his entire family is currently based in the United States and his main business operations are in New York ( a place where many wealthy Americans cannot afford to operate from). See this Kumekucha article for details. And by the way according to the kroll report, guess how most of the corrupt and laundered funds have always been transferred out of Kenya? It has mainly been through Citi Bank (An American bank). Anyway that is a story for another day.

Now for the sake of those Kenyans to whom the Americans are blue-eyed boy-scouts who can do no wrong, let me inform you that these guys are masters of the use and dump “toilet paper syndrome.” They use and dump people at dizzying speeds. If one Mobuto Sese Seko, former president of the then Zaire (now democratic republic of Congo) could rise from the dead today, he would tell you a tale to remember. The Americans propped him up in the 60s at a time when he was hardly able to tie his own shoe laces and nurtured and grew him into the monster of a dictator that he became. The main casualty of this American move was one Patrice Lumumba (democratically elected Prime minister) whom the Americans helped assassinate in a most heinous manner. The man’s body was dismembered and burnt so that no trace of him was left save for his upper teeth proudly kept as a momento by some Belgian weirdo soldier who took part in the “operation.” The Americans then abandoned Mobutu at his hour of need and proceeded to heavily back an assault that removed him from power.

Back home, the Americans eagerly supported Mwai Kibaki for a second term and the World Bank was dishing out Aid money to the government as late as in December 2007, months before the general elections. Word in Washington was that Kibaki was going to be re-elected. Quite odd when on the ground he was losing by a landslide. You will remember that the American government was a wee too quick in congratulating Kibaki on his re-election hours after a pre-recorded night swearing-in at State House Nairobi. Even when they were well aware of an exit poll by an American set-up clearly showing that Raila Odinga won the presidential elections. Days later it was the same Americans threatening President Kibaki back into line and into accepting the ridiculous idea of a coalition government that would incorporate all major competitors in the presidential race.

So what is the latest American game in Kenya with these visa ban announcements?

Joshua Kulei has very close links with Prime Minister Raila Odinga. Everybody knows that the Mois are majority shareholders in the Standard group and that is why many were puzzled at the extremely favorable coverage Raila has always gotten from the Standard newspaper which at one time was almost an ODM newsletter. All that was courtesy of Kulei who was sure that Raila would win the presidency and wanted to warm himself to him to stay away from prison (a place he knows only too well after decades as a prison warden before his meteoric and overnight rise to wealth began).

What is in fact happening is that the Americans are practicing what I call “scare diplomacy”. It seems that some important Kenyan government officials have to be “scared into line” so that they play ball when the Americans present a petition for something they want very soon. It is as simple as that.

Hawa wewe Obama? OUCH!!!

The Americans stand accused for allowing Kulei into their country with funds whose source they knew very well. They in effect helped this man rape the Kenyan people. Uncle Sam held the legs apart as the heinous crime was committed.


See other HOT related Kumekucha articles;

Moi family problems in securing wealth abroad

Why Kulei was threatend by Moi sons

Gideon Moi’s trip with his father to be introduced to Banks in Luxembourg

The Joshua Kulei story

What Is The Alternative To Not Having An Election ASAP?

Yesterday there was a lethal flare up somewhere near Globe Cinema on Kirinyaga Road (some old folks still use the old name of Grogan Road). Some Somali national bought a piece of land and proceeded to fence it off without caring what would happen to all the jua kali mechanic plying their trade on the grounds.

It was a clear illustration yet again at just how tense things are in the country at the moment. But it seems that very few people have taken note and even fewer care. One group that has woken up pronto is the NCCK which is pushing for early elections because Kenyans are just sick of this coalition nonsense.

However some Kenyans are of the view that we should all be a little patient and wait. But wait for what?

Wait for the current government to push forward a new constitution? Wow!! Maybe in your dreams. All the guys eyeing the presidency in 2012 want the powers of the office intact so that they can do their thing. So is it surprising that a year later there is no “whiff” of a new constitution?

Wait for minimal reforms? Are you serious? Can these jokers agree on anything? Can this government get anything done, other than stealing maize and other selfish and personal stuff?

A prominent coalition partner’s favourite way of putting things is that this government came into power under extra-ordinary circumstances and therefore Kenyans should be patient and give the government time to get things done. I am sick of hearing this line because it is a lie. The truth is that politicians want Kenyans to be patient so that they get a little more time to steal to replenish their 2007 campaign expenditure and then to prepare their 2012 war chest funds.

The mood in the country is deadly and the only thing that can save us all from chaos is an early general election as soon as possible.

Yes, I am aware that we do not have an electoral body to9 run elections just now. But my point is that once we all agree that we need an election right away, a way will be found.

Deputy Prime Minister Musalia Mudavadi posed a rhetorical question in an interview with the press a few weeks ago in answer to Kenyans being fed up with the coalition government. He asked; what is the alternative to the coalition government?

I ask my own question in reply; what is the alternative of not having an election ASAP? Answer: Trust me, you don’t want to know but it has something to do with lots of chaos.


Kumekucha was first to call for early elections in this post, months ago.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Starving While Seated Atop Sh 5 Billion Gold


The blind Ngoli Lomorukai of Turkana Central may be staring death in the face thanks to ravaging famine and starvation. But not for ENTERPRISING Kenyans who have dutifully taken ownership of a controversial consignment of blood Gold from Congo belonging to Zimbabwe's Vice-President Joyce Mujuru. She may be among the 200 banned elites profiting from Mugabe’s draconian regime, but she surely knew Kenyans’ prowess to OVERCOME any difficulty where REAL MONEY is concerned.

Our own blue chip lawyer (almost ECK chair) Cecil Miller came in handy using the right connections to AUTHENTICATE the gold consignment as originating from Kenya so that the Swiss company would not associate it with blood gold. This is big business for the boys and gatekeepers and woe unto you Kenyans depleting wild berries for lunch and dinner.

Cecil Miller
Mrs Mujuru’s daughter who is married to a Spaniard is a typical child of African big families. Even after being smoked out as trafficking blood gold from DRC, she still shamelessly offered to use the right contacts and like-minded scoundrels to change origin of the cargo. Reminds you of our own Goldenberg scam where gullible government paid for exported air as gold.

We are really a working nation in permanent slumber. With one lip we admire Obama with his blistering daily hands-on and with the other bigoted lip we entertain leadership by cronies with sharpened claws drawing blood from every vein running through Kenya.

So poor Ngoli may blind and suffering painful hunger pangs. But who cares when REAL BUSINESS beckons in REAL GOLD? Some things can only happen in Kenya and be viewed normal.