Here is a multiple choice exam for you. My sincere apologies to all because I know the great phobia that Kenyans have for examinations. Can’t blame them when our educational system is what it is, little wonder that parents have no qualms buying leaked examination papers.
Please tick only one answer because ticking 2 shall automatically be marked wrong by the computer (sorry you can’t bribe it). You have up to 30 minutes to carefully think and consider before marking the correct answer. (maximum marks 100 and a pat on your back from yourself)
Good Luck.
1. If you were William Ruto and you happen to receive a visa ban from United States, would you;
a) Become the good man you never were and keep your mouth sealed. After all there is a sizeable number of Kenyans who do NOT believe that it is Ruto.
b) Become the good man you never were and apologize to the Kenyan people for all your sins of omission and commission of the past asking them to forgive you but allow you to keep your ill-gotten wealth.
c) Resign your cabinet post and launch your 2012 presidential campaign early satisfied with the funds that you have already looted while in cabinet.
d) Sponsor a censure motion against the United States of America for interfering with the affairs of a sovereign state like Kenya and announce that you have no interest in visiting the US anyway.
e) Strongly deny any insinuations that you might be the visa ban minister and threaten to sue those who persist in bringing forward your name.
f) Make a long emotional tantrum-speech on the floor of parliament invoking your wife and children (Kimunya-style) and hope that Kenyans will sympathize with you and start demonstrating on the streets on Nairobi against the evil United States. You can of course help push the process forward a little by giving some idlers a small cash incentive and some placards.
g) Prove to the public beyond any doubt that there is no visa ban against you by traveling to the United States ASAP.
2. If you were Raila Odinga, William Ole Ntimama or John Michuki you would do one of the following when the next elections are called;
a) Announce your resignation from active politics and pave the way for a new generation of leaders.
b) Start a campaign in your constituency to declare yourself MP for life in honour of the services that you have contributed to the people of Kenya having been in active politics longer that President Obama has been alive.
c) Cheat Kenyans that you have never really had an opportunity to make a difference and if they want to see the real you (the way Kenyans saw the real Kibaki) they should elect you president.
d) Tell Kenyans that you deserve to rule the country because of your advanced age. Age goes with wisdom, so we are told. Which means that since independence Kenya has been led by extremely wise leaders.
e) Promise Kenyans that if elected president you will constitute a youthful cabinet. Of course the definition of “youthful” is rather loose. Only in Kenya can you be a youth aged 70 years old.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Identity of Visa-Ban Minister Revealed
For Kenyans still thinking in terms of ODM and PNU, this clearly underlines the fact that corruption has no party or tribal boundaries, the cancer eats into our society right across the board.
My information tells me that the minister is “very upset” over the news more so because there are indications that his family members and business associates will also be affected.
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Why do flash drives crash so frequently?
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Clearly the Americans launched an FBI investigation into William Ruto and the findings sealed Ruto’s fate. It is sad that the contents of that investigation are secret because it would have been of great interest to long-suffering Kenyans. It is also important to note that this is the first visa ban to happen under President Barrack Obama’s watch.
William Ruto: Contents of FBI investigation on him would be of great interest to Kenyans
Many Kenyans will be grateful that even after beating a censure motion against him, Ruto was not able to stop this latest development which means that foreign travel will be an extremely difficult if not impossible prospect for him.
The first big question this raises is whether Mr Ruto is capable of continuing to carry his duties effectively as agriculture minister at a time when this particular docket is so critical to Kenyans that it is a matter of life and death. For example he cannot attend any major Agicultural conference in the
The really fascinating thing here is that there is a new deadly and extremely powerful enemy to impunity in
P.S. My inside information tells me that Emilio Stanley himself and his immediate family could be the target of a future visa ban sooner than most people think. Wow!!!
The Bitter Truth...An Obama in Kenya Won't Happen in 2012
No, I've not met Prime Minister Raila Odinga as some have claimed.
Not too long ago I and a couple of friends in the Diaspora brought in a team to Kenya to study and give us a report on the viability of a people-driven change, one that would closely emulate the miraculous election of President Barack Obama in the United States. The team carried out studies and employed some of the best approaches to a matter of this nature, even where I thought their methodology would lead to suspect conclusions. In the long run, their findings have proved sound and fortified within solid reason.
After careful analysis of the massive data the team slapped on the table for our consideration, we all arrived at the conclusion that it would be impossible for Kenya to replicate what happened in the United States. There are simply too many logistical, political and historical obstacles that stand in the way of realization of this dream in 2012. For me, the most disturbing finding of the team was the fact that most people who admire Obama and wish for a repeat of his achievements here in Kenya were the very ones who categorically said they wouldn't vote for that person if they were not from "My tribe!"
Hhmm...!
Faced with this state of affairs, my friends and I asked the team to study the history of Kenya and its leadership and give us a report on who best qualifies to lead the nation in a post-Kibaki Kenya if a younger, charismatic leader can't emerge. Without hesitation, the team gave us this name: Raila Odinga.
I'm aware of all the names I'll be called for stating the findings of this team, but I have to go with my conscience on this one. There is only one leader in Kenya today who can and will work hard to push reforms. There is only one leader who will look out for the interests of all Kenyans. And there is only one leader who will ensure that perpetrators of the heinous acts that were visited on innocent Kenyans after the elections are punished.
That leader is Raila Amolo Odinga.
Uhuru, Martha, Saitoti and Kalonzo are a recipe for disaster.
Where were they when Raila risked his life to expand the freedoms we enjoy in Kenya today? And on what side did they stand when Kenya faced her darkest hour? Were they with progressive forces or with those who would deny Kenyans their democratic rights?
Traitors will always be traitors!
And with that, my fellow countrymen, I bow out of presidential politics and present to you, for renewed consideration, the Langata MP, the Rt Honorable Raila Amolo Odinga. I've not said I'm out of contention for Honourable Member from Rarieda. More on that later. For now, my word is...for a prosperous, peaceful and united Kenya to emerge, I call upon the Diaspora Kenyans and our compatriots within this great land to help build Raila and help sustain the dream and reforms he promised to deliver were he elected in 2007.
Let's keep the dream alive.
It's Raila 2012...or sooner!
Not too long ago I and a couple of friends in the Diaspora brought in a team to Kenya to study and give us a report on the viability of a people-driven change, one that would closely emulate the miraculous election of President Barack Obama in the United States. The team carried out studies and employed some of the best approaches to a matter of this nature, even where I thought their methodology would lead to suspect conclusions. In the long run, their findings have proved sound and fortified within solid reason.
After careful analysis of the massive data the team slapped on the table for our consideration, we all arrived at the conclusion that it would be impossible for Kenya to replicate what happened in the United States. There are simply too many logistical, political and historical obstacles that stand in the way of realization of this dream in 2012. For me, the most disturbing finding of the team was the fact that most people who admire Obama and wish for a repeat of his achievements here in Kenya were the very ones who categorically said they wouldn't vote for that person if they were not from "My tribe!"
Hhmm...!
Faced with this state of affairs, my friends and I asked the team to study the history of Kenya and its leadership and give us a report on who best qualifies to lead the nation in a post-Kibaki Kenya if a younger, charismatic leader can't emerge. Without hesitation, the team gave us this name: Raila Odinga.
I'm aware of all the names I'll be called for stating the findings of this team, but I have to go with my conscience on this one. There is only one leader in Kenya today who can and will work hard to push reforms. There is only one leader who will look out for the interests of all Kenyans. And there is only one leader who will ensure that perpetrators of the heinous acts that were visited on innocent Kenyans after the elections are punished.
That leader is Raila Amolo Odinga.
Uhuru, Martha, Saitoti and Kalonzo are a recipe for disaster.
Where were they when Raila risked his life to expand the freedoms we enjoy in Kenya today? And on what side did they stand when Kenya faced her darkest hour? Were they with progressive forces or with those who would deny Kenyans their democratic rights?
Traitors will always be traitors!
And with that, my fellow countrymen, I bow out of presidential politics and present to you, for renewed consideration, the Langata MP, the Rt Honorable Raila Amolo Odinga. I've not said I'm out of contention for Honourable Member from Rarieda. More on that later. For now, my word is...for a prosperous, peaceful and united Kenya to emerge, I call upon the Diaspora Kenyans and our compatriots within this great land to help build Raila and help sustain the dream and reforms he promised to deliver were he elected in 2007.
Let's keep the dream alive.
It's Raila 2012...or sooner!
Monday, March 16, 2009
"Titanic" Coalition Government Fails To See The Icebergs Ahead
As VP Musyoka admits that the coalition government is the cause of Kenyan’s many problems
You, my dear readers must be pretty sick by now of me telling you how I love movies.
My apologies as I indulge you in yet another movie. This one perfectly illustrates the situation in Kenya for me.
The movie is Titanic. Did you watch it? But let me say something before I talk about the movie.
The "unsinkable" Titatic shortly before it's maiden and only voyage. Is the coalition government about to hit deadly "icebergs"?
Former UN secretary general Kofi Anan thinks that the coalition government will hold and so do so many other prominent people. However Vice President Kalonzo Musyoka gave what must be his most controversial speech yesterday and confirmed what we have been saying in this blog and what Kenyans have been saying all along. The VP says that a coalition government is the worst possible kind of government we have ever had. He then went on to blame all the problems facing the country on the coalition government of which he belongs.
This statement from the Daily nation article on the speech was the killer blow for me;
Mr Musyoka bluntly described a coalition government as “the worst form of governance” which allowed politicians to endanger people’s future with impunity. Read the full article.
Now you have heard it from the horses’ mouth.
Back to Titanic. The movie was of course based on a real life tragedy where the biggest steam ship of it’s time, the Titanic sunk on it’s maiden trip from Southampton, England to NewYork City America.
The huge luxury ship employing the latest technology of the time was touted as being unsinkable (We have been told that the coalition government will hold and is unsinkable until the 2012 elections).
In the movie version a budding romance between two characters from very different worlds (played by Leonardo Di Caprio and Kate Winselet) takes place within the ship. The unlikely romance is held together despite everything by true love which is proved in the end. (The “romance” between PNU and ODM is held together by greed and corruption as VP Kalonzo Musyoka confirmed yesterday.)
And so the unsinkable Titanic hurtled full speed towards NewYork oblivious of the great dangers ahead in the form of icebergs.
The coalition government is hurtling full speed towards 2012 with ,members stealing and grabbing like there was no tomorrow, but like just as the Titanic never reached new York…EVER, the coalition government will never see 2012. The ship sunk on 15th April (1912) and in my vioew the coalition government will collapse a few weeks after that same date this year.
What icebergs do I see ahead?
Good question. Methinks that it will be all about the economy. Most economists think that the country will have been hit by the effects of the wolrd economic melt down by May this year. And without the “glue” that holds the coalition “romance” together i.e. plenty of cash to loot, what are the chances of it surviving?
I would like to think of the Kumekucha blog as that first officer at the top of the Titanic who saw the icebergs looming in the dark horizon and did his best to raise the alrm. The ship tried to turn to avoid the deadly icebergs but due to it’s great speed at the time, it was all too late.
Read more about The titanic
We were right and wrong about the coalition in this Feb 28th 2008 article
Will The grand coalition government collapse in this way?
You, my dear readers must be pretty sick by now of me telling you how I love movies.
My apologies as I indulge you in yet another movie. This one perfectly illustrates the situation in Kenya for me.
The movie is Titanic. Did you watch it? But let me say something before I talk about the movie.
The "unsinkable" Titatic shortly before it's maiden and only voyage. Is the coalition government about to hit deadly "icebergs"?Former UN secretary general Kofi Anan thinks that the coalition government will hold and so do so many other prominent people. However Vice President Kalonzo Musyoka gave what must be his most controversial speech yesterday and confirmed what we have been saying in this blog and what Kenyans have been saying all along. The VP says that a coalition government is the worst possible kind of government we have ever had. He then went on to blame all the problems facing the country on the coalition government of which he belongs.
This statement from the Daily nation article on the speech was the killer blow for me;
Mr Musyoka bluntly described a coalition government as “the worst form of governance” which allowed politicians to endanger people’s future with impunity. Read the full article.
Now you have heard it from the horses’ mouth.
Back to Titanic. The movie was of course based on a real life tragedy where the biggest steam ship of it’s time, the Titanic sunk on it’s maiden trip from Southampton, England to NewYork City America.
The huge luxury ship employing the latest technology of the time was touted as being unsinkable (We have been told that the coalition government will hold and is unsinkable until the 2012 elections).
In the movie version a budding romance between two characters from very different worlds (played by Leonardo Di Caprio and Kate Winselet) takes place within the ship. The unlikely romance is held together despite everything by true love which is proved in the end. (The “romance” between PNU and ODM is held together by greed and corruption as VP Kalonzo Musyoka confirmed yesterday.)
And so the unsinkable Titanic hurtled full speed towards NewYork oblivious of the great dangers ahead in the form of icebergs.
The coalition government is hurtling full speed towards 2012 with ,members stealing and grabbing like there was no tomorrow, but like just as the Titanic never reached new York…EVER, the coalition government will never see 2012. The ship sunk on 15th April (1912) and in my vioew the coalition government will collapse a few weeks after that same date this year.
What icebergs do I see ahead?
Good question. Methinks that it will be all about the economy. Most economists think that the country will have been hit by the effects of the wolrd economic melt down by May this year. And without the “glue” that holds the coalition “romance” together i.e. plenty of cash to loot, what are the chances of it surviving?
I would like to think of the Kumekucha blog as that first officer at the top of the Titanic who saw the icebergs looming in the dark horizon and did his best to raise the alrm. The ship tried to turn to avoid the deadly icebergs but due to it’s great speed at the time, it was all too late.
Read more about The titanic
We were right and wrong about the coalition in this Feb 28th 2008 article
Will The grand coalition government collapse in this way?
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