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Saturday, February 28, 2009

Conversation Between 2 Kenyans

1st Kenyan: Mambo?

Other Kenyan: Poa.

1st Kenyan: I am sick of the corruption going on in Kenya.

Other Kenyan: So am I. My Dad lost his job as a result of corruption. Life for our family was never been the same since.

1st Kenyan: Sorry to hear about that. What exactly happened?

Other Kenyan: He refused to look the other way. All he needed to do was sign some stupid document. He flatly refused to do so, said his conscience wouldn’t allow him to.

1st Kenyan: Your dad is a hero, you know that?

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Other Kenyan: Yeah. But being a hero unfortunately does not pay the bills. Anyway, how did your dad make his money?

1st Kenyan: He is a businessman.

Other Kenyan: What business does he do?

1st Kenyan: He has a company that supplies stationary and office stuff. He started it from humble beginnings when he was still a civil servant.

Other Kenyan: I would bet you that his biggest client is the Kenyan government.

1st Kenyan: Yeah. How did you know that? Do you know him?

Other Kenyan: Of course not but I know that is how the rich make their money in Kenya, especially former civil servants.

1st Kenyan: (Getting visibly uncomfortable) My Dad hates corruption. Talks about it all the time.

Other Kenyan: Well my dad doesn’t just talk about it, he tried to do something tangible against it and look what happened to our lives?

1st Kenyan: I am really sorry to hear about what happened to your family. So you guys live in Kayole?

Other Kenyan: Yes. In a tiny room that we all squeeze into. We have to close our eyes when our parents are dressing.

1st Kenyan: GOSH!!! But at least you save money to go to the supermarket don’t you?

Other Kenyan: Supermarket?

1st Kenyan: Yeah prices are lowest at the supermarket are they not?

Other Kenyan: You obviously have no idea what living from hand to mouth is all about. You never have enough, let alone some cash to go into a supermarket.

1st Kenyan: I think I have a rough idea of what it is like to be poor. When we were young and my dad was still working for the government we used to eat Matumbo a lot. And sukuma wiki.

Other Kenyan: Did you ever go hungry?

1st Kenyan: No. But eating some things is worse than going hungry.

Other Kenyan: I see.

1st Kenyan: Well at least we agree on what needs to be done in Kenya. We need brand new leadership.

Other Kenyan: I think we need a president who understands that eating some things is NOT worse than going hungry.

1st Kenyan: Ouch!! I did not mean it that way.

Other Kenyan: What if that man is poor himself, would you elect him or her as president?

1st Kenyan: Now there is a problem there. Poor people are mostly dishonest and thieves. There was this maid from a very poor family who stole all my mums shoes and clothes when she was at work.

Other Kenyan: My dad is a poor man so are you saying he is not honest?

1st Kenyan: Well your dad is exceptional.

Other Kenyan: Not really. There are a number of people I know who did very similar things to what he did. They are his friends mostly. The ones who have stuck with him. My dad says that the difference between a rich man and a poor man is that the rich man is greedier.

1st Kenyan: Well as long as this poor president had an Ivy school education like President Obama, I think I can vote for them.

Other Kenyan: Well if they are poor chances are that they will not have had an Ivy school education. Education is expensive and mostly the children of the corrupt in Kenya are the ones who had those opportunities.

1st Kenyan: How will they rule without a good educational background?

Other Kenyan: As my dad always says, all we need is a man of integrity. Period. We just need to stop the corruption. You realize of course that stopping corruption will affect your family business negatively?

1st Kenyan: No way!!! Anyway we all want change. Change will make everybody prosper.

Other Kenyan: Nope. I think real change will cause lots of upheaval amongst the rich in Kenya.

(To be continued if you readers feel it was worth continuing. Please let me know.)

Running Scared?

Remember Joseph Kamau, former head of the CID who had a problem coping with police commissioner Major General Hussein Ali and ended up being fired?

Well the man has made a dramatic resurfacing act and is now President Kibaki’s new special advisor on security affairs. As usual the man raffled feathers the minute he landed on the job by calling for the immediate sacking of the head of the president’s security detail. I was unable to establish the reason why Mr Kamau wanted the man gotten rid of but am still doing some digging.

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Kamau’s appointment at a time when the security of the two principals has been drastically increased poses some interesting questions that beg for answers. The current political situation in the country not withstanding, why did somebody feel it necessary to increase the security detail to unprecedented levels a few months ago? This was long before the so-called terror threat on the Prime Minister. Does the intelligence community have information suggesting that the executive would be under some sort of threat? What do they know that the rest of us do not know about this matter?

Meanwhile recent surveys by various organizations have confirmed what I have reported in this blog as the general feelings of Kenyans on the ground at the moment. For instance the popularity of the principals has sunk to an all-time low with most Kenyans firm in the belief that the coalition government has achieved absolutely nothing since coming to power about a year ago. Kenyans would also like to return to the polls as soon as possible (as impractical as that may seem at the moment.)

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Playing With Fire: Rich And Poor On Collision Course

I love to talk to strangers. Especially the down and out and ordinary Kenyan folk. In fact the reason why so many important people and even the media look to this blog to get a feel of what is happening on the ground is because of the track record of we seem to have in that area.

Admittedly it has not always been like this. I will forever remember with deep regret the serious blunder I made over the 2005 referendum. The blog was new in those days and I was yet to learn a number of things and build the impressive range of informant and contacts that I have today. At the time I talked to a lot of people about their views and I was sure I had it right. There was only one problem—I had talked to the wrong guys. And indeed you would be making the same mistake gauging things on the ground from the comments you read here from our readers. Mostly our commentators are rich privileged kids who have never gone hungry for a single day.

Over the last few days I have been doing a lot of talking to people (the right people that is, in Mathare, Kawangware and places like that) and a fascinating trend seems to be emerging.

Clearly there is sharp divide between the rich and the poor in Kenya that has widened into a chasm that is impossible to cross and too wide to build a bridge across. One of the perfect ways to illustrate this is by the widely differing views on Prof Alston’s damning report on police brutality and extra-judicial killings.

The rich mostly feel that police commissioner Maj General Ali has been very effective in cutting down serious crime and have no problem looking the other way concerning the methods used to achieve this. To them, the end justifies the means. Most of them point to the fact that there is no serious evidence to suggest that their was any killer squad formed within the Kenya police, never mind what the truth is.

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The poor have very different views on police brutality. Many of them having experienced police brutality first hand are looking forward to Ali’s exit. Police will never go to Muthaiga or Runda to harass the Kenyans who live there. Those thieves they wil mostly salute and respect. However they are always in Mathare and Kawangware and some middle class estates arresting people outside their houses for no reason. Even with groceries that they have just purchased in their hands to prove that they were not upto no good.

The biggest horror for the rich is being shot by some carjacker for handing over their car keys too slowly.

The biggest horror for the poor are the usual police operations ordered when something goes wrong where policemen go from house to house harassing, beating up and raping poor Kenyans whose only crime is to be poor.

It seems that already the serious fault lines that will trigger the anticipated poor versus rich troubles in Kenya are already beginning to show very clearly. The gap is too wide and more privileged Kenyans have absolutely no idea what it feels like being without lots of money in Kenya. It hardly matters how you earned it in the first place…

Tribal Clergy on Holy Mission to Re-invent

They hogged, hugged the cameras and waxed religious while playing to the gallery. But are the Kenyan men (sorry no women) up to any good given their soiled past these two years? Well, you can bet your next lunch these men of the collar are typical tribalistic Kenyans albeit with the added advantage of holy hypocrisy from the pulpit.

Taking the plastic high moral ground, Cardinal Njue has found the best excuse to lead his flock for tea at State House oblivious of the image he painfully created since December 2007. The less said about his sacrilegious abandoning of holy duty to prop up his kinsman the better.

Kenya’s Catholic Church built a reputation of defending the masses during Moi’s RUINOUS era but they lost that in a flash by supping with the powers that be once the right church-state DNA mix was complete. Njue’s short reign makes Otunga’s ordinary tenure look like saints of yore just like the present ECONOMIC RAPE FRENZY and misrule makes the devious Moi shamelessly claim the moral high ground in admonishing his astute students of fraud.

The Anglican Church may have found the game to the gallery too appetizing to resist as evident in the Catholic Church’s biblical betrayal to seek audience with the earthly throne. Apologists of the present scoundrels will predictably and readily justify the church’s selfish manoeuvres as one borne out of respect. Well, Kenyans have perfected the art of living national lies secure in the knowledge that nobody ever constipated on the vice.

Toxic fumes
This must be one of the smartest ways to divide and weaken the so-called Inter-Religious Forum. And the government must be all glee for the religious spanner boys coming hot in the heels of successful attempts to cut the giant KNUT to size.

Well, a regime premised on FRAUD and DECEPTION can only sustain itself with serial and shameless mischief at the collective expense of its subjects. With the church playing ball, the game can only go one UP for the gate keepers. Meanwhile ordinary Kenyans continue to choke from toxic fumes of fraud. NA BADO.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

How Long Will Police Commissioner Ali Last?

Soldier Boy Who Played At Cops And Robbers Now In Big Trouble

Also published earlier today: Taabu on Prof Alston and the bankrupt Kenyan psyche

The man has a rather dry, sardonic sense of humour that was very clearly displayed in a memorable press conference the day before Mwai Kibaki stole the elections in full view of TV cameras and the world in late 2007 (many are the times when he cracks a joke and laughs first a mischievous chuckle that would be more appropriate to a comedian rather than a law enforcement officer. And more oftren than not nobody else in the room finds what he is saying funny).
Police commissioner Maj general Huseein Ali: Under his watch terrible, terrible things happened.

In retrospect that day Ali was cracking jokes at the media conferemnce, we were being prepared for the horrific events of the next day and police commissioner Maj general Hussein Ali was at the heart of the game plan. In fact over a year later it is now coming to light that those plans may have included the “extermination” of any pockets of resistance to the electoral theft according to the report by UN Special Rapporteur Philip Alston.

Prof Alston has issued a bombshell of a report that just confirms a lot of what we told skeptical Kenyans in this blog about a year ago Read the full story. In fact I stand by the figures that I gave here then. That over 5,000 Kenyans have been killed by the police in the reign of terror overseen by police commissioner Ali.

For all intents and purposes it is now looking like Maj general Hussein Ali will be one of the first people to stand trial for his role in the failed presidential elections of 2007. Prof Alston has already asked the ICC (Hague) to take over the investigations into police brutality in Kenya and extra-judicial killings.

But even as we pass judgement of a man who has to go down in history as the most brutal police commissioner ever, it is important for Kenyans to understand the whole story behind this sad saga.

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The whole story, according to me, started long before the 2002 general elections. We were in a meeting at Ufungamano House. Present was at the meeting was Mwai Kibaki and a host of other NAK top brass. Kibaki repeated at that meeting what he had already said countless times before. That the problem of increased crime was one that was going to be tackled easily by budgeting for and employing more policemen.

Well we all know what happened. Kibaki did employ more policemen in 2003 but that did not solve the problem and his administration struggled with the problem of insecurity for a time. That was until they proudly announced the appointment of a soldier to the police commissioner’s post. Enter Maj general Hussein Ali (then a brigadier).

Ali’s strategy was simple, and I must admit, effective. The idea was to create killer squads and to hunt down suspected hardened criminals and simply mow them down in a hail of bullets. The only problem with this strategy is that along with the hardened criminals and scum of the earth were very innocent Kenyans whose only crime was that they were at the wrong place at tragically the wrong time.

When the Mungiki problem came (created and financed by politicians) Ali used the same tactics in a very vicious and bloody operation that left Kenyans numb with shock.

But Ali was not as smart as he always tried to portray himself in front of newsmen. It did not cross his mind that investigators from outside would ever start snooping into what the police were doing. He also did not realize the fact that it is impossible to wipe out all evidence when you are involved in mass murder.

The result is that even though the government seems to be defending Ali at the moment (or at least factions of it, because Prime Minister Raila Odinga, obviously thinks different from what he is saying) it is clearly only a matter of time before the soldier boy not only leaves office but also stands trial for his heinous acts.

Other effective ways of fighting crime other than mass murder need to be found. But the problem is that the old dinosaurs we have in office today cannot be expected to come up with new ideas or even to think out of the box.

Food for thought: NTV last night aired old footage of President Kibaki saying that criminals who killed others will also be killed and that “there is no other way.” This was early in his first (and only genuine) presidential term.

Related stories from the past:


Bad smells and why Ali should resign

What Ali did at the KICC at the height of election theft

An excuse for Ali's actions?


Best Case Study of Accelerated Self-Destruction

Prof Philip Alston came with guns blazing and shooting from the hip. The UN Special Rapporteur on Extrajudicial, Arbitrary or Summary Executions pulled no punches in recommending the resignation or firing of both Wako and PC Ali. What is more, he readily entered the local lingo by declaring that the AG was the embodiment of the phenomenon of impunity in Kenya.

Kenya has been left bleeding from all her orifices. Even before our national inner garments aired by both Judges Kriegler and Waki dried, Prof Alston is exposing the rot that pseudo patriots would rather is left to stink underneath. You know Kenya is in denial when parrot Alfred Mutua shamelessly regurgitates those tired lines in defending the indefensible.

Government’s sanctioned extra judicial killings in the last 5 years is an extended solid proof of the jungle and failed state we have degenerated into. No sensible Kenyan will be surprised by the predictable denials and contempt from Wako and Ali. The subsequent partisan brickbats taking the cheap party lines will be the icing on this toxic cake.

By attacking President Kibaki, Alston has invited smelly flies to patch on his coat. And they will come furious while trivializing his mission and report. Alston’s report couldn’t have come at a worse time with Kenyans chocking from the satanic grip of gate keepers who are busy auctioning every available piece of property Kenya while the voters scavenge for wild fruits to keep starvation-induced death.

The last one year has proved Kenya to be the most suitable case study of a self-destructing country whose leaders shamelessly circle a carcass as it rots. We are a failed state in serial and painful state of denial. Kibaki’s loud silence and inaction in the face of present challenges is not only deliberate but by design for acting otherwise is not an item in the shopping list of the present ruling class.

Reign of official terror
Only the rule of law separates us from other primates. But perpetrators of the free reign of terror using the police force and military can run roughshod secure in the knowledge that their devious actions will not earn them any reprimand. They are in safe hands and company. What with an AG almost clocking two decades as the chief obstacle in meting justice.

Poor Kofi Annan is wasting his precious retirement time in warning scoundrels who have no intention whatsoever of governing. Annan's concern must be treated as some irritating noise by the smart fast-track looters. Our predicament amounts to foolishly continuing to dig while already in a deep hell hole. NA BADO.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Omar al-Bashir’s Spirit Thrives In Kenya

It has taken the rule of Sudan’s sitting president, Omar al-Bashir, six years to exterminate 300,000 fellow citizens. That’s about 137 victims per day…for six years. While not exactly Adolf Hitler proportions, his is still a pretty efficient killing machine, wouldn’t you say?

Next Wednesday, the ICC sits to determine whether the charges against Bashir warrant a date at The Hague. There’s a chance they may let him free to continue roaming the sand dunes of Sudan atop a camel chewing miraa under the desert sun. You see, France, Russia, Britain and China are willing to essentially pardon the president, provided he shows a serious commitment to the peace process. What exactly is a ‘serious commitment’ to the peace process? That’s a rhetorical question. The four out of five permanent members of the UN Security Council, with ‘special powers’ to suspend ICC charges, are afraid that violence will increase exponentially should a warrant for his arrest be issued. Proper English calls that blackmail. Add that to the fact that the ICC is broke and in fact considering the release of Charles Taylor. Yes folks, the guy whose war tactics included chopping off limps, ears and surgically removing the full breasts of lactating mothers by use of rusty farm implements….such as the ones transported to Western Province in Kenya government vehicles prior to our bungled elections. You know you are a failed state when a local tribunal is regarded as the worse proposition even with the current state of the ICC.

Well, it goes without saying that our local PEV superstar suspects are carefully analyzing each step Bashir takes with great interest. This is an important ‘case study’ that may set the precedent assuring our prime suspects peace of mind. The argument will always be the same; frog matching suspects to The Hague will ultimately provide their supporters the green light to embark on large scale mayhem. The formula is simple. If you are going to commit any level of genocide or war crimes against humanity, do so with the utmost ruthlessness. You not only achieve your devious aims but also leave behind a bloody track record of what your supporters are capable of repeating were you called to answer silly questions at The Hague. Is there anything or anyone who can prevent our prime suspects from pursuing similar blackmail tactics? To maintain peace, justice will have to be curtailed.

This should not mean anything to Kenyans; of course unless we consider the fact that our current coalition government was established on the same premise; that of peace over justice. These ‘principals’ did not hug, kiss and make merry to provide Kenyans a route to prosperity and good living. Rather, they did so to stop Kenyans from shedding blood. Kofi Annan’s primary job was to stop the bleeding; not to clean and heal the wound. If we wanted a clean government geared towards healing the nation, we should have chosen justice over peace. It’s funny we are now preoccupied in searching the source of our government’s incompetence yet the majority of us breathed a sigh of relief at the raising of Raila’s and Kibaki’s jointed palms. Honestly, what were we thinking? Depending on your political affiliation at the time, one of the two ‘principals’ was in fact a culprit. Yes folks, a culprit with whom we rewarded either the presidency or premiership based on the fear of continued mayhem as may be delivered by his supporters.

What follows is a bloated government held at ransom by itself. One defined by its record breaking inefficiency in service delivery but with very high expectations from the public. Combine the pre-election promises of both principals into one government policy and you will start to see what the public expects. Think of visions upon visions of the Kenya we want and you will understand why 70% percent of us would rather see the whole machinery close shop. Here we are today starving for lack of maize, forgetting sold hotels and expecting the very same scandalous people, who we knew are culprits from day one, to own up to political responsibility; whatever that means.

Listen, as afflicted Kenyans, we must continue seeking for accountability on a daily basis, however, please do not go on hunger strike expecting the status quo to change….as you will surely starve to death.

Monday, February 23, 2009

The Jirongo/Ruto Mystery: Hi-tech Politics?


Cyrus Jirongo: The MP for Lugari as well as Chairman and owner of the political party KADDU: Dark past with Ruto that Kenyans have forgotten

Also published in the last few hours: Succession: Kalonzo political turf war

On the surface it would appear that Cyrus Jirongo is at the moment on a collision course with agriculture minister William Ruto. But is that really what is happening?

According to the information this blogger has, Cyrus Jirongo was one of the key players in the maize scandal and was working closely with William Ruto.

In fact one just needs to look at the past of these two individuals to realize that there is something somewhere that does not makes sense.

Lets go back to the 1990s and to the year 1992 to be more specific. That was the year that the first multi-party elections were held in Kenya after many years. President Daniel arap Moi was struggling for survival against lots of opposition. Incidentally the then united opposition operating under the banner of FORD (forum for Restoration of Democracy) had haled a mammoth rally on the Kamukunji grounds which must have caused Kanu hawks to urinate on themselves. To the keen observer it looked like Moi was going to be swept aside by the opposition political current. After all, the aging president had never stood in a seriously competitive election all his political life.

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Little did Kenyans know that Moi had a number of very dirty cards up his sleeve which he was about to play that would cause great damage to Kenyans. One of them was the birth of an organization known as YK92 or Youth for Kanu 92. The main players in that organization was one Cyrus Jirongo and William Ruto. Operating from a building called Anniversary Towers, close to the University of Nairobi, the offices of this organization were used to distribute cash on an unprecedented scale. Several eyewitnesses have described how cash was stacked in cartons that were piled up to the high roof and filled a huge hall. Jirongo and Ruto would authorize how many cartons were to be given to who and where they were to be diostributed. At that time Ruto was an innocent nobody who was being taught politics by Cyrus Jirongo.

Since those heady days the two have remained close friends so much so that in the maize scandal Ruto must have felt that Jirongo was the only person he could really trust to ensure that the trail never led back to him.

So could it be that Jirongo has now turned against Ruto? And if this is what has happened what ids the motive?

Actually a more plausible explanation is that the two are still friends and only pretending to have fallen out. The reason being that Cyrus Jirongo holds the key to linking Ruto directly to the maize saga. Naturally Ruto would want at all costs to ensure that nobody would try to follow that lead. Hence the fact that Jirongo voted against Ruto in the censure motion (what difference would one vote have made when both Ruto and Jirongo could see that he had the numbers in the house to defeat the motion?

You know there is something like being too damned clever for your own good and that would be an appropriate term to use to describe agriculture minister William Ruto.

Succession: Kalonzo Political Turf War in Mars

The Vice President came with the guns loaded and blazing. He was firing from all cylinders. And with the nozzle squarely aimed at the PM he left no doubt that making yourself relevant and count is key in every political game. The 70% Kenyans disapproving of the GCG are in good company of the VP. He has picked the gauntlet and fighting in their corner.

If Raila thought he would get away with his unwarranted criticism of the GCG then he got a promptly loaded mouthful from the President’s principal assistant. The man of God spelt it as clear at it is by reminding the LESSER PRINCIPAL that all key ministries responsible for coordination, prioritization and consistency in implementation of government programs are headed by ODM.

To remind all and sundry of his relevance, the VP listed the three parties making the Grand Coalition Government as PNU, ODM and ODM-K. And that should lay to permanent rest any doubts that ODM-K is just a passenger in Kenya’s present gravy train.

Kalonzo is not asking for too much apart from demanding accountability from his colleagues. His statement to the press couldn’t have been more clear and FORMAL replete with all instruments of his office.

Smokescreen
Every Kenyan of good will must rally behind Kalonzo if we have to detour from self-destruction. His mission deserves our unwavering support. Add Karua's nightly Reconciliation and National Healing overtures with Rift Valley leaders and you get people seeing far and beyond the present political gridlock. Theirs is proof to the fact that there is more to productive life than just DOMO DOMO.

Meanwhile ODM has no wiggling room and the RAGING HEAT is directed at her face. The NARA has been revised and people must be alive to the true position. With 7 out of every 10 Kenyans dissatisfied with the ineffective GCG, Kalonzo is demanding collective ownership of the one year failure epitomized grand corruption.

The smokescreen packaged as vision 2030 has been exposed for what it was. One year gone and the glue that partnered the scoundrels together is getting weaker by the day. The succession war will surely mutate into a hydra with every passing day, NA BADO.

Kibaki and Raila: Political Conmen Leading Kenya To Hell

Also posted a few hours ago: Then.. it got really ugly

By GUEST WRITER


The Saturday Nation has a good story about the appointment letter Prime Minister Raila Odinga signed for his job. Only few men would be so willing to display their letters of appointment – and a good majority of the male flock lock them up in a safe custody where their wives have no access.

But in our beloved Kenya, anything that doesn’t include creating jobs for the youth, providing food for the hungry, offering visionary political leadership, creating and distributing wealth to all regions in Kenya, fulfilling campaign pledges, being corruption free, not stealing maize for hungry Kenyans etc is possible. For now, all Kenyans of goodwill have to stop looking for ways we can all uplift and develop our country and focus on the letter Raila signed with Kibaki. Fate has made us peg our precious lives on the two conmen.

The letter could have been leaked by either side (Kibaki’s or Raila’s) with intention of projecting themselves in better light and mud-slinging the other party. After reading the story, my opinion was the letter exposed both Kibaki and Raila in good and bad light on 50/50 basis.

The letter could have been leaked by Raila’s aides (with his blessings) to “prove” to his fast decreasing supporters that he is gagged and hence he can’t play the role he knows best – criticizing the Govt even the one he serves. If letter was leaked by Raila’s aides, intention could be to earn him some public mileage in his falling political star.

He recently revisited his pet lies that his life was in danger. This time threat did not come from “assassins” shooting seven bullets on ONE SPOT of windscreen of his car cruising from Garissa to Nairobi at over 100km/p, but from “terrorists” wanting to blow up PM’s plane. I have lost count number of times Raila has went public saying his life is in danger. Which stupid terrorist would want a third-rate PM from a humble country like ours? Terrorists are people with a clear big missions. And I highly doubt Raila fall under their mission. But the police dossier (which was in Raila’s favour) could have achieved what Raila, through his aides, wanted – military helicopters for the PM. A PM should not use those misfit aircrafts at Wilson while Kibaki uses military choppers. Aren’t they “equal” partners in the Grand Coalition Government? So, the law says.

On the other hand, if Kibaki’s aides unleashed the Raila appointment to Saturday Nation, they were trying to fix Raila by showing he has all the executive powers he needs and he should squarely be blamed for the Government’s poor performance. Furthermore his job is that of a very powerful PM and the law expects him to formulate and enforce the implementation of all Cabinet decisions. So, Kibaki can come out clean and say, I seceded a big chunk of executive powers to the PM and he should take blame for any mess.

Knowing Raila’s chameleon politics, Kibaki outsmarted his “equal” partner. Kibaki’s letter to Raila says: “Outside these close government circles, you must, at all times, support the policies of the government both in public and in private.” As long as Raila signed the document, he can’t jump from a burning ship and blame Kibaki. Both of them are in it.


If you read the Saturday Nation story and look at it from both Kibaki’s and Raila’s angles, you will see how both can use the document to throw mud at each other or score political mileage. However, Kibaki’s, not Raila, political career is not at stake on or before 2012. Kibaki is on his way out and he cares little about the problems he has blindly led us into. Unlike period between 2002 and 2007 when all sins both real and imaginary (including somebody fighting with wife) were squarely blamed on Kibaki, under the current arrangement, both Kibaki and Raila are in same cage. But Kibaki doesn’t care as he’ll go home 2012.

As long as Raila agreed to be duped by Kibaki to drop his quest for a “stolen” presidency and agreed to sign a conmanship PM deal, he has no business whining all the time. On paper, Kibaki and Raila are “equal” partners. But in reality, Kibaki calls the shots. If they are “equal” partners, why did Raila swear an oath to Kibaki and accept a letter of appointment written and signed by Kibaki? Why didn’t Kibaki swear to Raila? Kibaki’s letter says: “I have no doubt that you will do your best to discharge your duties diligently and wholeheartedly for the benefit of the people of Kenya.” Why not other way round where Kibaki’s letter being drafted and signed by Raila or both having their letters signed by a neutral authority?

Apart from RECOMMENDING ODM ministers to cabinet, how comes all ministers swore to Kibaki as President and no mention of Raila or his PM post? How comes all ministers received letters of appointment signed by Kibaki and not Raila and no mention of PM in their letters? Raila’s role is JUST WATCHING as ministers swear to the dinosaur that is Kibaki. If they are “equal” partners, how comes Raila is only one who RECOMMENDS to Kibaki and not other way round? Why is it only one partner (Kibaki) who can call, chair or dissolve the cabinet?

In his protocol tussle with the VP, how comes Raila waits alongside Kalonzo and other dignitaries for Kibaki to arrive at every public functions? Why not other way round Kibaki waiting for Raila to arrive in other functions or arriving same time?

Who between Kibaki and Raila holds key to real power? Can Raila dissolve Cabinet or even sack a minister? What if Raila RECOMMENDS sacking of his own ODM minister and Kibaki rejects it? What if Kibaki fires an ODM minister and use state machinery under his firm control to enforce his move? What can Raila do? Can Raila sack an ODM (leave alone PNU) minister. He can only recommend in respect to ODM only! Can Raila appoint a Chief Justice and judges?

Can Raila sign any law passed by Parliament? Wasn’t he humiliated by Kibaki the other day when he received a memorandum from media owners protesting about a new law that had been passed in Parliament? Raila was gleaning on TVs assuring them the “Government” would look into their grievances and that he would present their memo to Kibaki for consideration. In an open show of contempt, Kibaki signed the law three days later! It had not dawned on Raila that the law on signing of laws passed by parliament was not amended and the president did not need to consult the PM.

If Kibaki and Raila are “equal” partners, how comes Kibaki’s salary is clearly set out in the constitution and Raila cannot use his own executive powers to determine his own salary and all he can do is whine in secret leaks to the media and in public that he wants a salary at par with his “equal” partner? How comes we have not heard Kibaki demanding to be paid the PM’s “higher” salary?

How comes it is only one partner who has the key of the vehicle (Kenya as a country and overall executive powers) and the other “equal” partner cannot drive it and the only thing he can keep doing is to keep RECOMMENDING to the other, “please drive we go”? Kibaki’s letter says: “Neither are you at liberty to announce major policy decisions without having to put the matter in question before the Cabinet.” But Kibaki can make all manner of roadside declarations, like Moi perfected, including making a village a province, if he likes, without consulting PM, Cabinet or PM. Maybe, he can consult Lucy Kibaki to make Othaya Kenya’s ninth province.

How comes Raila depends on Kibaki to provide him with security and not vice versa? We all see it. Whenever Kibaki is in same function with Raila, Kibaki’s guards are fully in charge and Raila is reduced to level of other dignitaries. Why do the bodyguards of Raila coil their tails and fight for space with the crowd?

If Kibaki drops dead today, what does the constitution say? Does it even mention the PM in any role after death of President? It says the current VP takes over. Raila’s and Kalonzo’s public gimmicks to be next to Kibaki are a result of bloated ego and signs of inferiority complex. It’s only Raila (not his “equal” partner Kibaki) who struggles to be next to Kibaki. Why that if both “equal”? Shouldn’t we be seeing a drama of Kalonzo jostling with Kibaki to be next to Raila and to invite Raila to speak last?

If Kibaki dies today, Kalonzo would automatically take charge as a caretaker president for three months before fresh polls are held. Kibaki’s death would bring an automatic death to the Accord he signed with Raila. Hence, Raila needs Kibaki alive to keep his job! But VP who would be in office then would be the sole beneficiary of Kibaki’s death as he would assume power and there would be no deal with a PM. Raila would then find himself jobless and he would most likely stay in the cold for three months trying to endear himself to his disillusioned supporters (if at all he still has their grip today) before a General Election is called by the interim president.

Bearing in mind Kibaki would not be a candidate, the political landscape we saw in 2007 (which favoured Raila and I believe he deserved it) would shift and Raila would have an uphill task marshalling the frenzied support he got in 2007. In fact, a big majority who voted for Raila were doing so in protest against Kibaki but not their love for Raila. Raila was the only strong DUME capable of flooring Kibaki and that is why we saw all sorts of characters of divergent political (criminals included) and ethnic backgrounds gang up in ODM to defeat Kibaki and his PNU.

On the other way round, a big majority who voted for Kibaki did not do so because they loved him. They did so due to the Raila Odinga presidency fear phobia that Moi put in Kenyan minds. Raila is regarded by some Kenyans, GEMA in particular, as a big threat to their survival. We saw all sorts of thieves and tribal political chiefs gang up behind Kibaki to secure the unfinished culture of eating and guarantee their seats in Parliament (and possible plum cabinet posts).

Kibaki out of the way, even in 2012, Raila will have the biggest test of his political career. Unless Kibaki openly backs him in 2012. Can Kibaki for once shelve his selfishness? I doubt.

But if Raila dies today, Kibaki would hold a state funeral for him and shed crocodile tears of how he had lost a brother! Afterwards, he would appoint a new PM from Raila’s ODM and he remains in office till his term ends in 2012. None of the other ODM heavyweight as Raila’s political muscle and Kibaki would have even an easier ride. If mighty Raila failed to shake Kibaki (apart from “sharing power to save Kenya”, the Mudavadis, Rutos, Henry Kosgeys, Balalas of this world would dance to Kibaki’s tune while wiping Kibaki’s shoes with their tongues.

The “executive powers” Raila “shared” with Kibaki are just an illusion and Raila was so hungry for power to see the con trap Kibaki had placed on him. In fact, the PM should thank his stars Kibaki wants to have title of president and cares little about running Kenya. If Kibaki and Moi were to swap places in the current arrangement, Raila would find himself dancing to a different tune. Moi would frustrate him and make his work a nightmare. This thing works because Kibaki wants it to work. Raila is Kibaki’s hostage.

It is, therefore, too late and pointless for Raila and his aides to keep whining over spilt milk. Raila has two choices – move out of Govt to force it collapse and or stay inside, shut up and fly in the same smelly oil with his “equal” partner.

The article is not intended to ridicule Raila and please Kibaki’s henchmen but the bitter reality. I have never been in support of this Grand Coalition (42 ministers, a PM, a VP and President!) as it does not fulfill my interest and desires and that of the majority of Kenyans. It only serves the pockets and egos of Kibaki, Raila and their equally greedy friends. Since both camps claimed there was theft of presidential votes, the best thing would have been to conduct fresh polls or one takes one for 2.5 years and the rest finishes. You can’t have two husbands sharing one wife and expect all will be well.

The Kibaki-Raila Govt will be another wasted five years. Time for Kibaki and Raila and their foot soldiers to go to Hague and leave us to charge destiny of our beloved country is now.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Then… It Got Really Ugly

Also published in the last few hours: The Fallacy of Two Principals

Fresh from his sweet victory in defeating the censure motion against him, Agriculture minister William Ruto seems to be on the offensive.

Ruto spent the weekend saying that Kofi Anan should hand over the list of suspects to the Hague and the suspects should all be tried there. Ruto’s name is without doubt on that list. So why is Ruto suddenly such a big fan of the Hague option? What games is he playing?

Actually the truth is that the political class is getting real nervous about an idea for trying post election violence suspects that is rapidly gaining currency. This is the one of setting up a UN-run-court in a neighbouring country similar to what was done to try the Rwanda genocide suspects in Arusha, Tanzania. Such a move would mean that perpetrators of violence will face justice much quicker than earlier expected. Naturally this does not go down well with Ruto who has big ambitions for 2012 and is hoping that he can get elected president (or Prime Minister at the very least) before he stands trial. Hence his big campaign to ride on the public popularity for the idea of trying the suspects at the Hague.

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Do you suspect your spouse is cheati9ng on you? Well, you can easily find out for sure by recovering deleted sms messages on their cell phones. Hehehehehehehe.
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It is also clear that Ruto is getting increasingly irritated with Martha Karua breathing down his neck and making things rather difficult for him and he has decided that it is now time to hit back. Using his errand boy and a man whom he helped make a killing from the NCPB maize scandal, Cyrus Jirongo, Ruto has revealed a number of things about Karua to the public. Jirongo has come out to confirm what Ruto has been saying and Karua has been denying. Namely the fact that the two have met several times to discuss politics and specifically 2012. But what is the point of this current circus? It seems the idea is to paint Karua in poor light as a desperate political novice in the high stakes game of going for the presidency. And somebody who has got a personal grudge against Ruto. Secondly it is assumed that by keeping Martha busy putting out small fires, she will stay out of the way long enough for Ruto and company to execute their game plan for the next few months.

Actually what has now began is a bare-knuckles-no-holds-barred fight for the presidency of Kenya. This can be noted from the fact that unlike before when both protagonists were not referring to each other by name, now names are being mentioned and specific direct attacks being made.

William Ruto has never been more confident in his life, more so after his stunning parliamentary victory last week.

Let’s see what unfolds in the next few weeks, however I would like to remind you to keep your eyes on those 3 gentlemen I mentioned. Ruto, Uhuru Kenyatta and Bonny Khalwale. Anybody doing this will be able to read the politics of the day very accurately indeed.

The Fallacy of Two Principals

Kenyans are better advised to see the reality for what it is that no two principals can effectively deliver on anything. The national lie of being governed by two principals is just a red herring cleverly designed to soothe political egos. The truth be said, what is on paper is simply meant for the eyes and the ears that chose to listen to those very words.

The LEAKED letter of appointment of the prime minster must disabuse us of notion to entertain any mirage of equality. First nobody appoints you to be his equal and only a fool would knowingly allow you to pull a rag under his feet. An authority can only appoint subordinates.

Forget about the so-called NATIONAL ACCORD agreement that birthed this GCG. The superlative verbs supervising and coordinating where were never meant to leave the paper they were written on. The PM has been exposed for throwing a tantrum on pay. How can he dare demand higher pay than the president’s principal assistant? He would rather brace himself after the juvenile protocol wars early last year.

Even a rudimentary understanding of the old Swahili saying of FAHALI WAWILI would be adequate enough to disentangle this fallacy of two principals. Just look hard enough around the success story of FALSE SECURITY IN NUMBERS. By signing on the dotted lines, the gagging was sealed and delivered.

Competing interests
With more faces to apportion blame, even the TRIBALLY INFECTED churches have the canny audacity to attempt re-inventing themselves by playing to the gallery. Deception mutates into various forms and Kenya’s gate keepers will readily draw from their reservoirs built since independence to create smokescreen for their apologists to chase. Meanwhile the entrepreneurs continue to auction the next available piece of body Kenya.

Leaking and publishing the PM’s letter of appointment was a masterstroke. That single act will succeed in inciting Kenyans for his lack of action and helplessness by cleverly melting Githogo’s hitherto apology of hands firmly tied at the back in the boxing ring.

Above all else the letter exposes the fallacy of two principals where one hires the other with no authority to fire the same. Speak of an oxymoron packaged as a political charade. And the beautiful circular motion continues as Kenya sinks steadily towards abyss. The fourth president will surely inherit a lifeless skeleton for country.

Friday, February 20, 2009

No Shame As Kenya Receives Food Aid From Sahara Desert

I am surprised that President Kibaki did not look at all ashamed receiving a donation of relief food from Egypt a few hours ago. See story here.

I mean Egypt is literally a desert and gets much less rain than Kenya (actually the country hardly receives rain and South of Cairo, rainfall averages only around 2 to 5 mm (0.1 to 0.2 in) per year and at intervals of many years.) However they have been able to use their limited resources to become self sufficient in food to the extent where they can afford to donate food stuffs to the Kenyan government worth Kshs 10 Million. To be honest I hung my head in great shame when I saw this news clip just now. I was so ashamed I just had to make a post.

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Kumekucha titbits: After your long flight into
Kenya, do you want to seat in a traffic jam for
hours as you try to get into chaotic Nairobi? Or
would you prefer a budget hotel in the outskirts of Nairobi?
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Actually apart from the Nile Valley, the majority of Egypt's landscape is a desert. The country includes parts of the Sahara Desert and of the Libyan Desert. Compare that to Kenya with Lake Victoria (the source of the great River Nile that passes through Egypt) and several rivers and lakes in the country. Not to mention plenty of fertile soil in idle land that if utilized properly can create great wealth for the country.

I have said it here before and will repeat it for the sake of our newer readers. By simply making serious efforts to harvest rainfall and creating enough storage facilities, the lives of Kenyans can be revolutionized. Digging boreholes is not the best solution for the environment and depletes underground water resources with devastating long term consequences.

See also: No Ugali? Why Don't the People Eat Chapati?

What future for Kenya?

Thursday, February 19, 2009

No Ugali, Why Don't The People Eat Chapati?

Also published in the last few hours: Defeated Ruto Censure motion saved lives by Taabu


Final Warning: A Bloody Revolution Is Coming

Yesterday President Mwai Kibaki and Prime Minister Raila Odinga sat visibly uncomfortable as they received a well-deserved dressing down from religious leaders from virtually all faiths united in their view that the trio has failed Kenyans. Even more telling were the wild cheers the clergymen received from the crowds.

Indeed many of the points they put forward will be extremely familiar to Kumekucha readers but the bottom line is that the principals have remained tribal chiefs who just wanted the big seat and have failed to provide leadership for the country and to unite all Kenyans at a very crucial time. They have no business leading a cattle dip, let alone a whole nation.
Read The Full story of what happened.

Personally what I find to be the saddest thing of all in Kenya today is that many leaders and indeed other Kenyans who live a comfortable life have failed completely to see where we are headed. Too many Kenyans are asking the question that shows they have no clue; if there is no ugali, why don't the people eat chapati, after all it is now cheaper? In other words they have failed completely to understand the masses and what is really going on now as you read this that can only end in one thing--bloody chaos.

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Do you suspect your spouse is cheati9ng on you? Well, you can easily find out for sure by recovering deleted sms messages on their cell phones. Hehehehehehehe.
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This was very well illustrated here last week when I gave a my predictions for the future based on careful analysis (and not witchcraft as some commentators believe). My predictions were greeted with anger, especially the one about a coming bloody uprising by the hungry masses. Folks just couldn't stomach that. Not after the bloody post-war chaos that we are yet to recover from.

Ladies and gentlemen let us not be the proverbial ostrich that buries it's head in sand and ignores the rapidly approaching forest fire, believing that if they cannot see it then it does not exist.

Actually since I made those predictions numerous other political analysts have concurred including Mutahi Ngunyi on an interview aired on national TV and in his Sunday Nation column. So I think we have reached that place where it is important to understand why all these sane people are talking war.

Since I penned the controversial words in my prediction, the situation has in fact badly deteriorated. One of the ways that we would have been able to avoid violence was if the 10th parliament had continued on the same path and in the same spirit they had in rejecting the constitutional amendment bill to create a local tribunal. That spirit was perfect because it echoed the feelings of the people on the ground. That would have easily saved the situation. However in defeating the Ruto censure motion, the current parliament showed it's true colours and alienated itself from the people. Even as you read this interest in the live parliamentary broadcasts is waning rapidly. And sadly so because some interesting things happened in the house yesterday (parliament failed to pass the list of new interim electoral commissioners simply because somebody whispered that the chairman is a wife-batterer).

In other words because parliament has failed to articulate the true feelings on the ground, the people will be left with no other option. And get me right, not that anybody will plan it it will all be spontaneous. And don't call me an inciter because the real inciters are parliament and our leaders.

Sample this; in replying to the very genuine points of constructive criticism brought against the grand coalition government President Kibaki jeered at them and told them to stop acting holier than thou because everybody is to blame. Kalonzo Musyoka repeated the same sentiments quoting a verse from the Bible out of context that says all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. What does that tell you? It is clear that Kibaki and Raila will do nothing. It will be business as usual (wacha wale wanataka kupayuka wapayuke). So what do you sincerely expect?

Please tell me what we should do? A commentator here yesterday criticized me for not offering solutions. How can you offer solutions when people are in denial and are saying that actually there is no problem. What problem will your solution be designed to address?

Ohhh and I almost forgot. The staple Maize flour that so many Kenyans rely on for food is already selling for as much as Kshs 90 per 2 kilogram packet (Kshs 120 in some places), however it seems that Kenyans ain't seen nothing yet because prices are set to rise yet again. Read the reason why here.

Defeated Ruto Censure Motion Saves Lives

Ruto may have weathered the political storm but most pedestrian pundits are ignorant of the heightened tension on the country side outside the city and our keyboards. North Rift was one place nobody wanted to be before the censure motion.

Te mainstream newspapers and TV stations conveniently avoided telling the story behind people glued to screens keenly watching parliament proceedings live in every joint in Eldoret. Maybe it was responsible of the journalists to practice guarded caution lest they be accused of being alarmist and RATTLING SNAKES.

Anybody with a keen eye on his/her surrounding must have witnessed a near exodus from the outskirts to town centre the day before the motion. Once beaten numerously shy and with the IDP wounds still festering and becoming septic, people were not taking chances after WORD WENT ROUND warning that Bonny Khalwale and Martha Karua and all associated with them by dialect must either shape up or ship out.

Forget about the empty gloating of security for all. The hot balloon has been pierced and deadly militia continue to roam our villages waiting for DEPLOYMENT. Kenyans have reason to fear for themselves. With no moral authority to order anything or anybody around except brute state force, the government lost Kenyans long time ago.

The faint hearted will wax patriotic and chest thumb about raw power oblivious of the potent tinderbox waiting to have its pin off. We all love peace that separates us from other apes but ours is exclusively premised on our love to live a collective national lie. Kenya has never been fractious and if you doubt it from the relative comfort of your keyboard then you better continue dreaming hard and please don’t wake up to the harsh reality.

Politics is no game for saints and Kenyans must brace themselves for the long haul with the present scoundrels on wheels. A few good people may be in it for the wider good but only until the shit hits the fan of expediency and self-preservation. Feathering their nests at our collective expense must be the unwritten memorandum which most appear to water with their blind loyalty.

Cheap politics of emotions
Thank God for small mercies albeit for all the wring reasons. Defeat of Khalwale’s motions may have restored short term peace in the PEACE VALLEY but not for long. Anytime political temperatures soar, the villagers see the flames engulfing the tinderbox. It remains a matter of when and not if the pin gives way.

In the meanwhile those weaned on newspaper and emotional politics can drink from their time tested cups with their heads deep inside the sand. Reality will eventually strike them hard on the face soon.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

10th Parliament Crashes And Burns Shortly After Take Off

After taking off beautifully last week (over the Hague bill) in the eyes of Kenyans, the 10th parliament crashed and burnt before completing take off a few hours ago as Agriculture minister won a stunning victory against a censure motion brought out against him over the maize scandal.

In other words our dear legislators voted to support corruption and impunity.

Kenyans on the streets and everywhere we managed to interview them are now saying that the true colours of this parliament that has refused to pay taxes has now clearly come out for all to see.

Ruto enjoyed a landslide victory of 133 MPs voting against the motion and only 22 supporting.

What has greatly angered the people further are the numerous meetings held at various city hotels last night whose agenda was today’s censure motion that would almost have certainly seen Ruto resign had it succeeded. Sources tell this blogger that the agriculture minister hosted a huge contingent of legislators at the Nairobi Casino and then for some unclear reasons the “party” was moved to the Safari Park Hotel later. It is said that MPs were making their way home at 3 am this morning. Money is even said to have exchanged hands and that is why a motion that at first seemed to have huge support suddenly fizzled out. Even the man moving the motion, Ikolomani legislator Bonny Khalwale was a pale shadow of himself at the crucial moment and the gynecologist by profession failed “to deliver the baby safely” for the anxious Kenyan people. Indeed the evidence Khalwale tabled against Ruto was so weak that he did not seem to believe it himself. So what happened to the convincing points he has been raising over the past 2 weeks or so? Was it so hard to back it all up?

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In retrospect it was one motion that Ruto would not have afforded to lose. With all sorts of accusations leveled against him concerning the post-elections troubles, the man probably felt that only his stay in the seat of power could protect him adequately from the many troubles ahead. And so if it is true he spent the fortune that people are saying he spent, then he must be sleeping well tonight, secure in the fact that he spent his money well.

But the biggest loser in today’s debate was the Kenyan people some of whom have already lost their lives due to starvation. Ruto says the maize sold was too little to feed starving Kenyans. Of course he is carefully ignoring the fact that his actions triggered off heft price increases in the marketplace. So the question of how many bags were sold irregularly does not really arise here. The truth of the matter is that Ruto's action have had a devastating effect on the price of the Kenyan staple of Unga.

Impunity has once again won the day. But mark my words it has only won one of the many battles with most still to come. The war proper is another matter altogether.

P.S. Just a reminder folks... I told you to keep your eyes firmly fixed on 3 individuals. William Ruto, Uhuru Kenyatta and Bonny Khalwale. The big question I have on my mind tonight is; did Khalwale attend the Casino and Safari Park bashes?

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

In Case We Go To The Hague

Winners:


Kenyan Tax Payers: In these tough economic times, we should be happy that our tax shillings will not be used in the formation of a kangaroo court.

Kamiti Residents: The way I see it, all prisoners in Kenya must ask their respective wardens to open the prison gates and set them free. After all, the judicial system that locked them up has lost all confidence. The journey to The Hague vindicates all of those who’ve been in front of a Kenyan judge.

Raila Odinga: In about two weeks, we shall start hearing some fantastic stories about how Raila really and truly never wanted a local tribunal…even though he voted for it. Come campaign time, the people’s president will take credit for sending chaps to The Hague. His vote as recorded in the gazette will be seen as a tactful political chess move to hoodwink some people who we really don’t know yet.

Mwai Kibaki: Now that this thing is pretty much over, my friend can go back to State House and rest. The trips to Parliament Buildings were not only cumbersome but also very tiring. Rather than listen to hecklers saying ‘no’ to his face, he would rather sit in his backyard listening to birds chirp and feeding bananas to the monkeys of Arboretum.

Ruto and Uhuru: Wacheni kupapatika wasee. Fifteen years is a long time to prepare a defense…. and even if they lost the case, current ICC prisoners eat eggs and sausages for breakfast. As we speak, there are some Rwandese prisoners in Tanzania playing badminton in the lush ICC prison yard. Life as an ICC prisoner is not too shabby.

Phillip Waki: For the first time in Kenya’s history, a commission’s report may mean justice. Praise be to Waki…even though his list left out a huge number of suspicious tax payer fattened MPs.

IDPs: It’s going to take a while but justice will come…someday. Just the sight of Kenyan suspects shivering behind the bullet proof glass should provide some solace.

Kalonzo Musyoka: He’s probably the only person in Kenya who can claim he did not cast a stone…so if he goes to The Hague, it will be as a witness or a tourist. That alone should allow him some kind of relevance in future.

Major Ali: Much as he’s willing to divulge all the details of the much publicized police killings, the man simply does not have a case to answer.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Lords of Impunity, Return of the Arturs


Like father like son so they say. Al Saadi Gaddafi came to Kenya and secure in the knowledge that we have sold our soul to his father he ran roughshod right from the airport after disembarking from the private jet with his mother in tow.

That Gaddafi Senior has total contempt for Kenya is not in any doubt. After auction our country to him before the last bungled elections, the King of kings treat us as the rag that we are. And why not when the highest bidder came to our rescue at the time of dire traits in need of election funds?

Al Saadi had our security men eating from his hand. The prince was accorded all the state security and even extended the handshake past the elbow when he demanded to use his riffle to shoot game at Maasai Mara. And the visit couldn’t have come at a better time for Kenyan get keepers when artificially engineered hunger fraud consumed all our attention.

Gaddafi is on a mission to bastardize the BLACK CONTINENT with his grandiose pet project of United States of Africa. In true Kenyan spirit he bought 200 tribal chiefs from all over Africa to crown him KING OF KINGS just before assuming AU chairmanship. And when he did he dropped the bombshell from Libyan template of democracy dolled in single party.

One can only imagine what OBJECTIVE role Gaddafi would have played were he the AU chair during last years PEV. Thank God for small mercies for the LEADER would have done everything to protect his interests and prop up those owing him plenty in hitherto glamorous Grand Regency deals and all its derivatives.

Moral authority
Fraud strips you of all traces of moral authority and Gaddafi knows it better. He came to Uganda early last year not only to open the regions biggest mosque but he had his eyes singularly trained on payback cheque from his Kenyan debtors. Damn the grim bloodshed then within out shows and the beneficiaries knew better than upset supreme king. They went to Kampala to negotiate postponement of pay. No wonder the GR couldn’t wait to be rebranded LAICO despite the intense heat it generated from within.

Armed with the right dossier of our culpability, Al Saadi came calling the shots. His bravado and trashing of our security apparatus was a re-enactment of Artur brothers II. Well history is unkind to those who refuse to learn from it in making sure such poor souls repeat it at a painful cost.

We haven’t seen anything yet from the ENTERPRISING rulers and their cronies. Al Saadi just outdid the scoundrel in the obtuse impunity game..

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Mutahi Ngunyi Recycles Kumekucha As Raila Says Coalition Government Is Not That Corrupt

Mutahi Ngunyi is a well know political analyst and a fascinating character for those who know him better (but that is not a story for today). An interesting aside here that comes to mind is that Ngunyi was being interviewed on live TV as Kenyans anxiously waiting for the results of the presidential elections in December 2007. His careful analysis of the results trickling in showed that Raila had won and he said on the programme that Kibaki should concede defeat and hand over power. In effect if there was any court case or investigation to try and find out who really won the 2007 presidential elections, then Ngunyi has to be a key witness in the proceedings.

But I digress. Towards the end of last week he was interviewed on K24 and he repeated a lot of the predictions that I made here in a controversial post that was not too well received. He repeated the same sentiments in his weekly column in the Sunday Nation yesterday. Ngunyi says that it is not a question of if Kenya will explode but when. You can read the full article now.

It seems that most people do not understand why the country will explode or why it seems inevitable that we cannot escape another round of violence and blood letting, as much as we want to. This just illustrates how wide the gap is between ordinary down and out folk now paying a record Kshs 120 per 2 kilograme packet of maize flour through no fault of their own and the lucky few Kenyans who decide what they want to eat today and where they will eat it.

People also don’t have a clue why the coalition government is finished, including senior politicians in it. So let me give you a small illustration to help us all understand.

Imagine this school where some of the school prefects have rebelled and defied the school administration. The rest of the students are very excited about this naturally. So as headmaster what would you do? Would you just relax and pretend that everything was okay? Of course not. The thing to do would be to sack the prefects who defied you immediately and restore order and authority right away. Indeed in any management situation you don’t stomach rebellion, you cannot afford to.

Jomo Kenyatta understood this well and so did Daniel arap Moi. But Mwai Kibaki does not seem to have the slightest clue. While there is more democratic space, thios does not change human nature and the fundamentals of politics and governance.

This is one of the reasons why the coalition is doomed. It is really just a matter of time.

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There are those who say that corruption is the glue holding the coalition government together and for this reason it will survive until 2012. While it is true that corruption is a strong glue, there is yet another motivating factor (and much stronger factor) that will help break the GCG much quicker than most people think. It is prize much more valuable than the corruption currently going on. It is the presidency of the republic of Kenya which means billions and billions of shillings. Politicians are ambitious and very greedy. That combination is deadly. Many in the 10th parliament are already scheming and planning how they will come out tops in the next general elections. That is what caused the embarrassing defeat of the government in the house over the Waki bill and that is what will roast William Ruto if the censure motion against him comes up for discussion in the house this week (as is widely expected). Don’t forget that I talked about the power of those TV cameras and radio micropones in the house that are causing MPs to play to the gallery and to echo the feelings and sentiments of their constituents unlike the situation before.

* * * *

These days every time Prime Minister Raila Odinga opens his mouth to speak it ends up being a political disaster and the support he once had continues to be eroded by the day.

The latest is that Raila has disagreed with most Kenyans and said that the Grand Coalition government is NOT that corrupt. In fact he told off the church for criticizing the government. Read the whole story here.

Wow!!! That is all I can say about that.

Sunday Quip: Impunity, Word of the Moment

I was looking at the word impunity the other day and it suddenly dawned on me that it is made up of two short words (I don’t know whether it is by design or by ‘accident’).

The two short words are: i) Imp and ii) Unity

My dictionary defines an imp as a little devil. A little devil really! So it logically (?) follows that people who commit atrocities with impunity are simply united, little devils. And, boy, what damage and havoc devils (whether little or big) can unleash, is unsearchable.

God knows how many united, little devils we have in this country. The past one year or so has seen the emergence of the handi-work of these “little devils” on the fabric of the Kenyan society.

Yeah. And these are the very same people who should face the heat for their cold, steely hearts! The perpetrators of the post-election violence (these “little devils”) should face the knife of justice Hague-style.

Kenyans are tired of the culture of impunity. “United, little devils” should be served with the kind of “justice” that they know only to well: they should not be let to breathe the fresh air like the rest of us guys.

They should be stripped off their leadership positions and their case hearings and judgement dates should be “fast-tracked”. Impunity must be dealt a death blow.

For how long are Kenyans going to be led by “united, little devils”?

God, please save us from ourselves.

Elsewhere:
Albinos in Tanzania: Legislators should Stand up for the down-trodden

Do people really understand…?

Friday, February 13, 2009

Is Raila’s Life Really in Danger From Terrorists?

Politics is a dirty game, they say. The main reason why they say this is that many times the end justifies the means when it comes to decision making in politics. Meaning that a politician will do anything to win an election and the same for their survival. And when I say "anything" I mean anything in the full sense of the word.

The local media made a curious report yesterday which appears in today’s dailies. We are told that the police are on a high alert over a terror attack threat on Prime minister Raila Odinga. We are told that terrorist kingpins are upset over Kenya’s continued support to America in their fight against terror. We are even told the exact nature of the planned attack (something unheard of when it comes to terror attacks). It is said that the evil plotters plan to bring down a helicopter that the PM will be traveling in.

Of course it is possible that terrorists have suddenly gotten extremely rusty and have allowed information on their exact plans to filter out (when we know even the people carrying out the terror missions never have the full details until the last possible minute). But it is also possible that this whole thing is a hoax designed to achieve certain political objectives.

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Kumekucha titbits: Laptops get dropped all the time. Did you know that this can easily cause your hard drive to crash with vital data and information trapped inside? Hard disk recovery in Kenya exists and could be your only option if such misfortune befell you.
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All my warning bells went off when I read this report and further inquiries amongst those who understand this business concurred with me. Terrorist are first and foremost politicians and the current situation in world politics with a brand new administration in Washington is NOT conducive to a terror attack anywhere in the world just now. To make matters worse the man sitting inside the White house now has a Muslim name “Hussein” and is much admired amongst a vast majority of the people whom terrorists will always seek sympathy from for their heinous actions.

Then to target Kenya just now would not make any sense at all. Further it is imperative to note that one of the reasons why the Americans got very nervous about a Raila Odinga presidency stemmed from the fact that his presidential bid received enormous support from a number of Arab countries. This makes it very difficult for me to believe that terrorists would want to target the PM of all people, even if they wanted to carry out an attack on Kenyan soil.

So what would the possible motive of this curious report be?

Every politician knows that public sympathy is an extremely powerful weapon. It wins elections and can magically turn the tide of public opinion. There are many examples where politicians the world over have used sympathy to win public support but let me give an amazing example from a neighbouring country.

When president Jakaya Kikwete was running for the presidency in 2005 on a CCM ticket, a curious incident happen during a public meeting in Dar-es-salaam. It was clear even at that point that Kikwete was going to win. But his handlers probably wanted to leave nothing to chance. So the presidential candidate was invited to speak and he just said a few words and then fell and passed out in full view of TV cameras and the mammoth crowd. Later he held a press conference to say he was okay and was probably just a little tired. He also added that he had been fasting. I was in Tanzania at the time and I can tell you the mood of the country changed dramatically after this drama and in the end rather than winning my a simple majority, Kikwete won the presidential vote with a staggering over 90% of the vote.

We know that politically Raila Odinga is struggling at the moment. Indeed he has entered the political struggle of his life. Some analysts even say that he is finished politically.

If we take these facts and put them next to the alleged terror scare on his life, things begin to make a little sense.

Because after all, any serious security person will tell you that it is a big mistake to reveal the fact that you are aware of an attack on a person you are protecting. The best policy would be to pretend that you have no idea. That way you will be more prepared. In the Kenyan situation we are even telling the terrorists that the PM will now be using military helicopters which are harder to target. Wow!!!!

Why Kibaki And Raila Must Go

What is ODM? What is PNU? What do those strange abbreviations mean?

There was a time in the 10th parliament when things were pretty predictable. If ODM voted in a certain direction, you would be sure that PNU would vote in the opposite direction. So if the two principals wanted something done they rallied their troops and then came to parliament and everybody would obediently rubber stamp what they wanted done. That is how the crucial Anan bills were passed in record time.

Now all that is ancient history. The only place where people are still divided along those old party lines is here in Kumekucha. Go out and talk to the Kenyan people on the ground and you will quickly discover that "ODM" and "PNU" are very very dirty words these days.

Yesterday the 10th parliament embrassed the two principals by defeating a constitutional amendment bill in their faces, whose intention was to establish a local tribunal to try post-election violence suspects. Some MPs have been heard saying that Raila and Kibaki should prepare themselves for more nasty surprises and embarassments. This was only kionjo.

I hardly ever agree with what Mutula Kilonzo says. However what he said yesterday I agree with 1000%. He said that Kibaki and Raila should now resign because their troops have lost all confidence in them. Mutula was being kind because what we saw in parliament was a clear message from the people of Kenya. They are tired of impunity and they want justice. They want big names behind bars for their crimes and they do not not trust the local justice system. And most of all they are tired of the grand coalition government.

I would go further and say that a government as divided as the grand coalition government is at the moment is a serious threat to our national security. Do you have any idea how dangerous it is for us to approach the threats against our country with a divided multi-agenda-laden cabinet? What kind of things to these guys get involved in individually in private to further their own selfish motives?

If Kibaki and Raila really loved mama Kenya, they would heed Mutula's call and resign right away, paving way for us to look for a way to hold general elections ASAP.

Fresh elections are the only way we can avert disaster which hangs like a dark and persistent cloud over our country.

Let me end by saying that the way the politics in Kenya is shaping up, anything can happen and the 10th parlaiment looks like the parliament most likely to move a successful vote of no confidence in this government and thus send themselves back to the electorate for a fresh mandate. Naturally any MP who appends their name on such a motion would guarantee their place in the 11th parliament.

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Lest you take comments in Kumekucha too seriously;

What I said 2 weeks ago;

Excerpts;

It is sad reading through the comments in this blog daily where well-educated Kenyans are still thinking in terms of PNU and ODM (and the gods they worship, namely Kibaki and Raila) when the vast majority of Kenyans have already moved on. More so when it looks like even most legislators have moved away from those tribal groupings as was seen yesterday in parliament...

Of great interest are the new political re-alignments that are now emerging and more interestingly the motivation behind them...

Many other legislators who had nothing to do with the post-election troubles have a lot to gain by blocking the bill and causing all the suspects to end up at the Hague. It will obviously eliminate a lot of the competition for their grand ambitions.

I doubt whether most of the political class conecerned slept well last night. You see the game plan was to have a local tribunal and then intimidate all the witnesses from coming to give evidence (already a number of key Waki witnesses have received death threats). Now it seems that the Hague beckons for sure...


What a Kumekucha commentator said about the post;

Anonymous said...

Chris, Please come back from fairy land. The bill will be passed and there will be a local tribunal.

Read the full post Here

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