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Friday, November 23, 2007

Latest News: LIVONDO FAILS ECK LANGUAGE PROFICIENCY TEST

The ECK last evening declined to accept Mr. Stanley Livondo's Direct Nomination for Lang'ata Constituency by PNU after he failed to pass the Language Proficiency Test given by ECK last week.

The flamboyant rookie politician who only a month ago was arrested on murder suspicions after the fatal shooting of a youth during a public meeting he had attended in Western Kenya is said to have dropped out of school at Standard Six and can hardly construct an English or Kiswahili sentence let alone pronounce words like "Categorically" and "Ashamedly".

Unknown to Livondo , Kenya 's electoral rules require that Parliamentary candidates pass Oral & Written Language Proficiency Test. Earlier today thousands of PNU supporters from Central Kenya were reportedly disenfranchised after the ECK declared that 20,000 newly registered voters in Lang'ata had committed electoral fraud by double registering.

"I Sdanley Lifondo teclare here totay my inderest in te seat for te memper of barliamend for Kibera. I plech to remufu one Raila Otinga from his currendi stanting as MB in tis gonstichuensy."

Members of the Press had to remind Mr. Livondo that the constituency is called Langata,and not Kibera. More reports filtering in indicate that Stanley Livondo attempted to have the ECK approve his candidature on the strength of marks he scored in an English Composition that he wrote while in standard six at Bukhungu Tay & Poarding Primary School .

Mr. Livondo is set to hold a press conference later today at Inzogu Bar & Restaurant where it is rumoured that he will use the opportunity to showcase his Standard Six Composition and accuse his main opponent of "Priping" the ECK even as he moves to "tuck" the "ECK Pullet".

This did not surprise me at all when I received the news via email, am waiting to see if ECK rules will be bent in his case.

16 comments:

Phil said...

Sue, I have been trying to ascertain whether this information is factual but the ECK are very economical with information these days. (infact they are yet to publish the updated voter's register at their website - last done May 2007).

This morning I received information that Livondo presented his nomination papers to the ECK Returning Officer at Langata, as did Raila, Wauruinge and a Ms. Mbai.

It is easy to chest thump at a presidential function at the nearby Dagoretti constituency just as it is easy to present bicyles at Otiende Estate, but it is an entirely different ball game to actually conduct a campaign rally in Kibera, especially if you come on the platform of insulting the current MP rather than selling your own policies. I am waiting to see if Livondo, Mbai and Waruinge will succeed where Rugendo, Amayo and others failed in the past. But I wish them luck.

Anonymous said...

I saw this story on kenyanlist.com and i hav since established there is no truth in the matter.

Sue said...

Phil time will tell.

Anonymous said...

This could be true with a pinch of salt or propaganda but in Kenya 99% of rumors are true. I have heard many stories about Livondo being a lower primary school dropout and drug dealer so its not surprising as you say. Let his sponsors print certificates to show he went up to high school or even college. Hes been quiet lately may be hes going through rigorous verbal English language training, but there is no time for written one, unless they do it for him. We are waiting for him to address a rally or press conference in English soon.

Mwai Kibaki said...

Kumekucha can you confirm whether it is Kibakis people behind this personal blog of the president.

http://mwaikibaki2007.blogspot.com/

Rozie said...

I read Kumekucha but never commented, now that Livondo’s issue has come up again, did he answer the questions raised in a previous post? Phil can you give the answers as promised if he didn’t respond.

Sad that someone wants to close this blog, they dont know how its useful to Kenyan's especially now.

Taabu said...

Nice one Sue. My ribs are aching.

Anonymous said...

Was he highstrically accompand by Esau Okhunyanye?

Anonymous said...

>Sue said...
>Phil time will tell.

>4:38 AM

>Taabu said...
>Nice one Sue. My ribs are aching.

Simon says........
Time will tell indeed. What will the ECK do with the more than 20,000 than have been found to have fraudulently double registered as voters. These goons are mostly from central province.

As usual the ECK is always economical with their figures.

deroo said...

You mean it has gone this bad for Raila Odinga that LIFONDO is STANTING AKENST HIM. Bhane! Hii ni kali bwana.

Anyway, it is a pity that PNU, could get an academic dwarf like Livondo or even Ndura Waruinge to stand against a giant in the stature of Raila. Ole wako Raila.

Utashangaa Ferry!

Vikii said...

Mr. Anonymous just below Taabu, wewe ni mtu wangu. He was actually accompaND by Gumo who is Hon Raila's cuSin. He instated jokely offered them twice. He will not accept.

luke said...

Some of you may laugh hystrically here but know this- its no joke for joke, chopper for chopper or hummer for hummer when you have been shot at the ECK English language proficiency test and subsequently fail the same-clearly THAT was a bullet meant for him. Livondo does not play rough or indeed speak ECK approved English, and his failure of this test is yet another scheme to harm him-his bodyguard tried but could not take the test for him by pushing his head out of the way in time

Anonymous said...

Time has never lied to anyone, Stano is for real imagine Idda for Idda, Hummer for Hummer and Chopper for Chooper. Livondo like it has been said is a Gorvernment project and can do anything. Imagine he only obtained his ID just September 26th this year and his real name is Stanely Livongo.
Listen to this
There once was once a very nortorious Thug in a village, every one feared him alot and most of the time he went for a kill he made it real good.
One day after stealing some animals and they were heading home a small thorn pricked him, though he managed to get away but the pain could not give him peace, after somtime the thorn was removed from him, he looked at it and then asked "is this little thing making me uncomfatable and causing alot of pain" he therefore told the person to return the thorn back. He died after a few days.

Taabu said...

Vikii ulisahau kumeza dawa? I hope not and if you please do the necessary. You guys up there are ALL SICK. How dare you good people laugh at a funeral? I don't know whether to show my teeth in laughing or crying.

That said sometimes the small things in life we take for granted matter so much. Poor Lifondo @ 30 something and being that challenged? With all the money just like Too Bw Dawa. Message: Education can bring wealth and the converse is NOT true, shauri yake si angeenda ngumbaru wakati wa Moi?

njoro - mzee wa kijiji said...

I bet this is just propaganda. Livondo is the PNU candidate for Langata. Its all awash in the papers. I cant understand - rumours also require abit of skill. He may not be schooled as per our definition of schooling, but the guy has thoroughly gone through the univeristy of life - how many of us cannot start a snall business with all the chain of degrees that we have. Friends lets give ccredit where it due. This man maybe the surprise package for this election. Time will tell but check this space. He is not alone, he has the intelligence etc. Infact Waruinge may just step down for him sooner than later.

Kioko said...

So what if Livondo failed the language test? Was he sitting a Harvard University exam? He has been nominated as a parliamentary candidate for Kibera constituency. period. If Raila Odinga is not satisfied then he can go ahead and file an election petition and hope it will be heard and disposed off before 2011. Livondo is on his way to parliament. I think Raila has made the mistake of his life in standing in Kibera, a non-jaluo constituency. Kioko, BC Canada. Kazi iendelee. Livondo ni dawa ya ODM.

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