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Monday, July 28, 2008

Please Do Not Marry Fat Pot-Bellied White Women!!

.......why Githongo must come back home very fast.

We are all aware of the thousands upon thousands of able Kenyan men who cannot resist marriage to very fat white women when they are in pursuit of makaratasi. I'm sure some of you reading about this phenomena are victims of the same. The plan is usually to avoid any children for the two or three years it takes to receive that precious document. Unfortunately, some of these extra wide voluptuous white women become very crafty and indeed end up producing one or two babies. Many Kenyans have reached that crossroad; do you stay and enjoy that extra white mattress of a woman for the rest of your life or do you take off knowing that you will pay child support for the next 18 years? In retrospect, many Kenyan men wish they had a referee in the bedroom to ensure that no unwanted goals were scored at all costs.

Folks, it is at this very timely moment in our history that we need 'Githongo the Referee'. It's my hope that this man heeds the PMs call to come back to Kenya. You see, in the coalition marriage between ODM and PNU, it is quite clear who the very fat pot-bellied white woman is. It is also clear who the do-what-it-takes Kenyan man is. My friends, If we are not careful, we will find ourselves with very many babies. These babies will continue to have names such as Anglo-Leasing, Goldenberg etc. If we allow this very bad behavior to happen, Kenyans will have no option but to pay child support bills for very many years. Our paychecks will be garnished by the taxman until we are very old men and women.

I will remind you that we have recently paid child support bills in blood. Yes fellas, the post election violence, land disputes etc was actually a backdated child support bill resulting from the children brought into this world by our married post colonial leaders (the ones who stole all the land).

The way I see it, we need 'Githongo the Referee' to be in the State House bedroom at all hours. We need him there to ensure that this coalition marriage does not get too cozy and comfortable. Githongo must ensure that the bedroom lights remain brightly lit…...even at night. We need Githongo to thwart any efforts or schemes that will lead to fat white women with pregnant bellies. He must make sure that no champagne or changaa is drunk in the bedroom because we all know where that leads to.

For the love of country, Githongo must accept to be the prophylactic that prevents the conception and delivery of corruption.

Otherwise, babies will continue popping out very rapidly….as in the case when you make popcorn from scratch.


Anonymous said...

Some stones are just too heavy to turn, nevertheless, we need a start.

Anonymous said...

One small but important correction: you don't get the passport that easily. Getting married is not enough, even if and when you produce some children. In most countries (especially in Europe and mainly in the States where the rules are even stricter), all you are getting is a Residence and Working Permit. But the marriage has to be 'consumed' and you have to continue living together under the same address for at least 5 consequent years. If you leave before, you are loosing everything. In some countries this period has been prolongated to 10 years. Only then is it possible to apply for a passport. Again you are carefully checked and have to produce proves of your financial means, a steady job etc. and of course, your marriage still has to be intact. And something else which you did not mention: if you apply for the passport, you have to give up your Kenyan Nationality since Kenya does not accept dual citizenship. And don't believe that life in Europe and in many other countries is just milk and honey. Most of these marriages are breaking up after a short time because of racial problems. The environment especially in Europe is very hostile towards these mixed relationships and it needs a lot of courage (and love) to overcome this. Your post is like spitting into faces of your country-men. I do not think, they deserve this.

Anonymous said...

Obviously Anonymous 9.37 missed the WHOLE point of this article. I suggest reading the post entirely first before commenting.

kalamari said...

Anon @ 9.37, this post is not an exposé to what folks go through in pursuit of 'happiness' and is therefore not spiting in the face of fellow country men. All I'm saying is that we must remain wary and savvy to ensure the coalition government does not return us to one party politics where under the table deals are the order of the day. If we allow this coalition fraternity to coalesce and become 'one', they will fleece us to eternity.

Githongo may be helpful. said...

But Githongo's life my still be in danger ( revenge, if-it-were-not-for-your-loud-mouth type of feelings,etc )

Anonymous said...



Human Rights Watch calls for Mt Elgon probe

NAIROBI, July 28 - An international human rights organisation has echoed calls for the Kenyan government to launch an independent probe into alleged atrocities committed by the military and the Sabaot Land Defence Force (SLDF) in the Mt Elgon region.

Human Rights Watch (HRW) Consultant Ben Rawlence said Monday that the government must also account for dozens of people detained by the military, and several of them who are now said to have gone missing.

Rawlence expressed: “What we saw in March and April was a strategy of arbitrary arrests, torture, disappearances and killings. Such a strategy is very concerning; the allegations need to be investigated and people brought to book so that the security forces learn that this is not an acceptable way of dealing with an insurgency.”

In a 52-page report called "All the Men Have Gone", HRW termed the extent of the torture in Mt Elgon as "truly shocking" and accused both Kenya's security forces and the SLDF of torture, rape and murder.

"Since 2006 the SLDF has attacked thousands of civilians; killing, raping, and mutilating, in a complex mix of land disputes, criminality, and struggles for local power," it said.

Rawlence added; “The people are happy that the SLDF is being combated but they were traumatised for years and now again they have been traumatised by the operation. They also fear retribution by the militia.”

He further intimated that the Red Cross should be given access to the operation site so that they can monitor the situation, in an area where a food and health crisis is threatening to escalate.

International health organisation Medecins Sans Frontieres (MSF) last week complained that security officers had denied them access to the area.

SLDF launched attacks in 2006 to oppose the redistribution of land by the government in that area. More than 600 people are reported to have died under the hands of the militia and 60,000 more displaced.

A government offensive that began in March to counter SLDF’s operations has however been accused of killing at least 62 more people, while about 42 others cannot be traced, according to humanitarian agencies.

“We have a list of people arrested by the military, but to date - according to their next of kin - they have never been found,” said Job Bwonya of HRW’s Western Kenya branch.

The joint army-police ‘Okoa Maisha’ operation has netted at least 800 suspects, though 600 of these have since been released. Key figures of the SLDF, including its leader Wycliffe Matakwei, have also been killed.

Though security authorities have repeatedly denied any wrongdoing in the operation, the government has launched its own inquiry into the claims but the report is yet to be made public.

The Kenya National Commission on Human Rights (KNHCR) has been at the forefront of pushing for independent investigations and has gone ahead to petition the United Nations (UN) human rights arm to bar military officials implicated in torture from participating in foreign peace-keeping missions.

Vice Chairman of the State-run human rights watchdog, Hassan Omar, said Monday that those suspected to be behind any violations would have to defend themselves before the UN body.

“We have been in touch with the High Commissioner for Human Rights and we are in the process of finalising our list for transmission to the UN. And then we will be hoping to find our way into the Human Rights Council meeting in November to shed more light,” Omar expressed.

Anonymous said...


Crackdown exposes drugs scam at KEMSA

NAIROBI, July 28 - A nationwide crackdown by the Pharmacy and Poisons Board has unearthed a major scandal implicating the Kenya Medical Supplies Agency (KEMSA) in the sale of drugs meant for public hospitals.

The Board’s Deputy Registrar Dr Wilfred Oguta said Monday that a crackdown conducted at over 1,000 private clinics in seven provinces revealed that fake doctors were selling government-marked drugs.

The Board’s inspectors, he said, had visited Nyanza, Eastern, Western and Rift Valley Provinces. Others toured were Coast and North Eastern.

“It is standard practice that medicines supplied by the government are marked GoK (Government of Kenya), MOH (Ministry of Health) or Not for sale,” he explained.

“So when we find any product which could be having those marks or where those marks may have been rubbed, then what we do is verify that this product could have been a GoK drug by checking the batch number.”

Dr Oguta said it was difficult to trace the source of the medicine, because those selling them were not willing to divulge any information.

“Sometimes it is theft,” stated Dr Oguta.

He said the board had passed on the information to the Ministry of Medical Services and the Kenya Medical Supplies Agency (KEMSA) to investigate the suspect supply of the drugs.

Currently, KEMSA is the only authorised government agency charged with procuring and distributing pharmaceuticals to public hospitals in the country.

But the agency has been accused of corruption and inefficiency, which recently led to the dissolution of its board.

It’s Chief Executive Officer, Charles Kandie, was also sent on compulsory leave, and a nine-member taskforce formed to investigate operations at the agency.

“Out of the 963 premises inspected, 225 were ordered to close. We have a total number of 148 premises and people being taken to court.”

“There are those who usually close when they hear that inspectors are on the ground. So far we have found around 443 premises closed. Partly we attribute this to the fact that they know they are doing the wrong thing,” he asserted.

Another crackdown on illegal premises and quack doctors in Nairobi began on Monday.

Dr Oguta emphasised that the purpose of the inspection was not to punish indiscriminately but to enforce provisions of the law, which are aimed at ensuring the public gets quality products and services that are protected from unscrupulous traders whose only aim was to make profits.

“The public should be cautious of premises that are closed when inspectors are around – some who even close for a whole week, others close during the day - only to reopen in the evening when the inspectors have left,” he noted.

“Such people play hide-and-seek because they know they are either not qualified and they don’t have licenses or they could be selling drugs from questionable sources.”

Taabu said...

Spot on but how dare you spoil the party as the FAT WHITE drum is salivating for the necessary and rare services. Don't worry about Anon 9.37 rants-read in between the lines and see who it is ONE AND ONLY ONE. You hit hard you know and the guity are afraid except she missed teh metarphore by a river. You only understand Kenya if you are Kenyan and not mere selfish association.

As for JG being the referee I don't envy him any bit. The sciencemay be so noisy and disgusting he would serially puke.

kalamari said...

Taabu, I agree that JG even if able may not be willing to swim in the poignant waters of the Kenyan government. But for how long must the man remain a living martyr? Most Kenyans recognize his refreshing capabilities of naming names without much fear or favor.

That said, his services to the motherland in the form of BBC interviews and presenting term papers to whoever has an ear in foreign lands is far from Kenyan statesmanship. Of course the man fears for his life but for how long will he await the 'opportune time' to come back.

There's a danger in his resume ending like that of the now co-opted Koigi Wamwere. Githongo may choose to starve in the universities of London and only come home in his old age to amass wealth in about one MPs term.

That is the failure of Africans.

Anonymous said...

What is the connection between the headline which obviously only serves to attract the attention of certain people and the otherwise serious content of the article? Githongo and what he stands for deserves a more serious approach than this cheap gutter-press language expressed in the first paragraph of this post.

Vikii said...

Kalamari, thanks for your very well intentioned concerns about how Kenya is governed.

I however have a problem with this mentality we have that answers to Kenya's problems lie with ANY one individual. This is exactly the root cause of our disappointment with President Kibaki. We put all our hopes and aspirations in him in 2002, as if he were some ambassador sent to Kenya straight from heaven. I have my opinion on how successful his government has been in reviving the country that "had been ravaged by years and years of misrule and ineptitude", but one thing is clear to all, his performance has not met expectations.

I can also see the obsession with Githongo. Are you telling me that in a country of 3? million people, only Githongo can do whatever he is credited for doing? And what is this that we need him so much for? You see, I do not have anything against Githongo (he is a good countryman), but the truth of the matter is that this hero kind of worship is dangerous, very dangerous. In my very humble opinion, Githongo's resume only stands out because he tape-recorded some people and ran away soon after.

What we need, Kalamari, are stronger independent institutions, the kind that is trully powerful enough to make individuals serving in them accountable. An individual, no matter how Githongoish, will surely disappoint--and that you can take to the bank!

Your article also goes to show how deep and low we have sunk. It is unfortunate that you could only mention one person who did, not anything special, but what he was hired to do.

Meanwhile, I wish you never-ending bliss with your newly acquired wide blonde companion. I have seen that type companionship before.

Taabu said...

BB here. You are VERY RIGHT that the burden of a whole country can not be shouldered by a single person. But there also lies the contradiction that good institution don't just pop up like popcorn. They need a focused and selflessleader to midwife their implementation, ama?

Look at the figurative message in Kalamari's and see the gem thereof. You are also right JG is being made a hero for doing what he was hired to do. Then comes the question imagine if all those who mater did exactly that. Ordinarily people would be ropped in and feather their nests. The difference makes JG a hero lest critics are latently hidding envy using thin transparent screens.

UrXlnc said...


excellent points, i quite agree with that. but that last para wasn't really necessary, i think you just enjoy picking fights bro.

kalamari, great article, although your figure of speech could have easily been misinterpreted (9:37) , but on a more serious note as alluded to, could be considered insensitive to those actually experiencing the said circumstances literally.

Anonymous said...

I will marry whomever i want.

Sir, that was a poor analogy reeking bigotry all the way. We are up in arms when blacks and Africans are portrayed derogatorily but without as much as a "bat of an eye' we do the same or even worse to others.

Your post is not much of an insult to Kenyans but to white women struggling with weight, some of them who are victims of this "makaratasi fraud", deceived into thinking that they have found true love.

Why would I care about white people being besmirched? Because, I believe in removing the speck in my eye first. Sort of the way I am more angry when someone from my tribe showing bigotry than with someone from another tribe displaying the bigotry towards me. It is just a matter of intellectual honesty, i guess.

call me cicero.

kalamari said...

Vikii, You are very right. It is indeed strong institutions that we desire even more than Moses himself. I totally agree with that point.

Lakini we cannot forget about who we really are and especially our diminished capabilities. You must remember that this is a nation of citizens who have been and continue to be ravaged by years of misrule and I must add, very grievous attempts to silence our manhood. We have lost very much in terms of fortitude in defining our future. We live in a nation where the majority are terrified by standard eight drop outs masquerading in police uniforms. Moi did a great job to shut down discontent.

It is during these times that men like Githongo are needed. To some extent, Kenyans need to be propelled towards the realization that our future is in our hands. I mean remember the days when matatu passengers were arresting traffic cops for requesting bribes. Isn't that nostalgic?

Githongo is not the end of it all but he may surely be useful in instituting those powerful institutions. That is what I say.

Vikii said...

Yeah, I understand exactly where you are coming from, Mwalimu Taabu. If everybody did what they were hired to do, ours would be a startlingly shining example of real progress. And may be the reason Githongo is such a hero in our minds and hearts is because nobody else ever does what they were hired to do. Otherwise you wouldn't consider it heroic.

But, Taabu, we will have to stop this habit of passing the buck all the time. Of course we have a patriotic duty to demand exemplary service delivery from our elected officials and civil servants, but what exactly is our role in their failure to provide such? Don't you think this is something that has to start with the individual? I said here a couple days ago (and you have talked about it all along) that Kenyans are generally corrupt and immoral human beings. A very huge majority of Kenyans, Taabu, right from the nursery school tutor and the postal clerk in Kitui, to the chief executive himself do not have any work ethic. Nobody has honesty. Conduct a research and you will find amazing levels of truancy,briery and some other bad things. Which begs the question; What gives us the right to so passionately demand transparency from government when our own individual closets are full? Would it not be easier for the realization of our dreams if we initiated change starting with our own conduct? Is it not Double Standards 101, when we condemn members of parliament for "earning" so much and at the same time expect them to attend 10 harambees every month? Are we not inadvertently validating their exobitant allowances and encoraging them to go loot so they could have enough for these hospital bills and tuition fees?
I don't know, man. I'm just asking.

Urxlnc, thanks. About my last paragraph, that was a joke my friend. I did not have any ill intentions. Just a light moment, man. Kalamari himself said here that we will have to learn how to laugh and I was hoping we could start there.

Kalamari, if that is the case,we don't need to get Githongo home. We have Wanagari Maathai and many other Githongo kind of folks in Kenya. But in a society where both the people and the system are so culpable, I dont think their efforts (before the system corrupts them as well)will amount to much.

Taabu, meet you at the Bridge on 08/16 (Harry Redknapp will surely need a shoulder to cry on) and the san siro a couple weeks later.

UrXlnc said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

vikii i stand corrected

tabbu, vikii, kalamari
great comments am absolutely in agreement

we are getting to a point where we need to manufacture or reinforce methods that address the question of how do we make these institutions strong? we have as you guys correctly point out the twin or (more aptly) triple problem of

a) overbearing and undue interference of the executive read one man show (a major problem and yet enshrined in the constitution)

b) corrupt officials combined with weak, dysfunctional or non existent checks or disciplinary enforcement (any wonder why schools are emulating the examples)

and the third (silent) factor
c) our apathy to the situation and in cases condoning or active involvement or support of corruption at small or large scales

clearly we need a starting point or points and it goes back to (in our current sorry state of events) one individual in each position of authority that refuses to bend to the whims of the executive, in short many upright kenyans such as JG, and others ready to get into a face off if need be. that is of course in lieu of having the upright one-man executive

on the other hand as i read somewhere else in a society of dishonest people, the honest ones wind up in jail. to stop this or turn it around requires a determined grassroots (massive public resistance or action) to compel the leaders take action against errant officials both in leadership or institutions (to beef up efforts of the few upright ones really interested in doing their jobs) and we should develop distaste for both mob justice prosecutions/persecutions as well as tribal based defenses. its a tall order, but absolutely achievable.

from where i stand i just dont see any way to tackle (a) above which is comprehensive constitution and institutional reforms with our current powerbrokers because as soon as the going gets good the key leaders appear to be too busy. so our best shot is at (b) and (c) i.e identify the JG types and stand with them, locate whistleblowers whether its hot air or not and ride the boat with them and like you've all said before need to start easing off the pedal (corruption) and press real hard on the pedal of (accountability and transparency).

do not give any leader room to engage in or condone corruption.

kalamari said...

Anon @ 12.05. Precisely why I bring up the arrest of corrupt traffic cops by wanainchi. What we lacked then was momentum. Had we received any vocal (forget legal) support from those we love to follow, corruption may have been dented a little bit. Today, Kenyans would be frog-matching assistant chiefs who delay with nation IDs.

Kenya is in desperate need of revolution…….which must be led by one person (or a group). To imagine that Kenyans will one day collectively wake up and become accountable incorruptible citizens is futile. We are simply incapable.

Taabu said...

Vikii said,

...What gives us the right to so passionately demand transparency from government when our own individual closets are full?...

Couldn't agree more. Human beings are EVIL by nature and design andleft to their own wishes they would happinly drink from other people's skulls. No wonder we have the BIG BROTHER called LAW to punish the wrong doers.

A functioning government readily earns everybody's trust. Yes we can do plenty as individuals but it amounts to null in the absence of adequate infrastructure which no single individual can provide. Look at the Scandinavian countries ranking top on IT index the order is TOP DOWN leaving the citizen with no choice.

Hard work must be rewarded which is only possible with working institutions. Lack of focused and selfless leadership leaves the youth and Kenyans in general to idolize FRAUD and DECEPTION. The only way out of the present morass in NEW KATIBA. None among the presnt lot will deliver that as evident in their cosiness once ushered into the eating club.

We must start from somewhere. Agree utopia is an illusion. But we can identify and rally around JGs, Maathais and Kiais in our midst. Granted, they are fallible and mortal but give it to that lot they have shown the way is doing right in a sea flooded by filth.

Vikii said...

Urlnx,your description of the kenyan problem as threefold is correct.

The first remedy will of course be getting it right in our review of the constitution. A constitution that gives the executive such an enormous leeway in decision making is a scourge. That is why people are hired and fired at funeral podia. That is why government ministers are able to create water boards for their villages only and get away with it. It is why the sale of government property is shrouded in secrecy. It is why ministers personally interview persons for admissions in the country as residents and compare themselves to 'appellate judges', never mind some of those considered for residence are characters with shoddy bckgrounds. In short, our constitution gives the executive way too much discretion.

Inasmuch as constitution-making is a political process, we will have to be wary of our politicians. We will have to come up with a document whose driving force is catering to the common man. A document that would render the decrees issued by these rogue ministers null and void, one that automatically leads to the censure and impeachment of the President when he disregards the advice of the Githongos to reign in corrupt ministers in his circle. we will have to give the electoral commission, the KACC, the police force and the National Assembly real independence. I am talking about a constitution for posterity, not one made with an individual in mind.

But, I still believe your last point (c) is the most important. We will have to change and impact a new way of thinking among our people. The truth which people have shown an astonishing reluctance to admit is that the people of Kenya do not seem to actually mind corruption. You can see this in the verocity with which people defend the gods of corruption in their political parties or their tribes. If these fellows are meant to understand where the love begins and ends, they will behave. But today, they know their robotic bunch of supporters and tribesmen will be there at their beckon when they steal, incite violence (tulimaliza watu mia sita hapa juzi karibu elfu moja..), abuse their offices and literally rape us right in the butt. If we don't change we will be taken advantage of for as long as it takes.

Kalmari, I agree. But I want you to think of Madiba and tell me how he was good for South Africa. Like you told us here last week, he has monuments in London, but has his achievements as a person left a lasting lesson to South Africans? That they should shun violence, corruption, ethnicity etc? This is a country where a woman is raped every 26 seconds, remember? Githongo will come to Kenya and probably even become president. They will hail him for being a statesman and blah blah blah, but Kenya will be back to its issue destructive and disorderly self after Githongo has come and left. That is why I still insist we need to serach our souls as a people. We need to ask ourselves what kind of lives we want our children to live. We need to reinvent ourselves, reform our institutions and then demand transparency.

UrXlnc said...

not to derail the discussion

this was entirely expected and predicted by many

whereas previously because of a "unified" cabinet, these same appointments were slipped in through a gazetted notice, now all manner of technocrats are rising up from wood-works to question cabinet appointments. now this is a good thing but highly suspect

these practices have been in place since independence and not a finger or voice raised. where are they all coming from?

I do not in any way support or condemn the action of the ministers (i have no knowledge on the procedures could someone publish the details), am raising the concern that we should look at the methods their predecessors (of these "professional") were appointed and if its similar to those in use now then these technocrats have to raise objections to the methods used. if however they can demonstrate otherwise then the ministers and their advisors need to go. and this should be done in ALL ministries even the ones not making any noise currently.

investigate ALL of them starting 2002 todate name the ministers and PSs and let them go into early (belated) retirement.

Anonymous said...

This is probably the only post I have seen - with the comments hitting 20 something and everyone maintaing sobriety.

WAY TO GO GUYS (not forgetting any ladies since am one of them).

Without naming names, please warn your buddies that everyone has decided to adopt respect as their middle name.

Vikii said...

Urxlnc, you have an interesting opinion on the actions of these ministers.

What the tradition has been as regards government appointments has absolutely nothing to do with what is right or wrong. If improper and reckless appointmments were made by Mwai Kibaki in 1988, by Simeon Nyachae in 1994 or by Martha Karua in 2003, they should not be used as an excuse for Anyang Nyong'o, Ngilu or Ruto today. Ministers should not hinge their decrees on what their predecessors did, they should do what is right.

Urxlnc, I am sure you are aware that Amos Kimunya was not the worst Finance minister in independent Kenya as far as propriety goes. Why were ministers like Saitoti,Obure and the others not censured by Parliament? Why were they not asked by the President of the time to resign? The answer to these questions is-- Nobody Cares. 2008 is not 1993. The kenyan people have said that they want a new way of doing things. They may not always have their way, but they are at least making their voices heard.

This, in my opinion, shows the subjective way we want to deal with very serious issues, Urxlnc. I will ask you a question; how much do you understand about the disposal of public assets by government? I know you know just as much as you do about a minister unilaterally transferring employees from one parastatal to another. How I wish you could condemn both with equal vigour.

When you look at the explanation offered by Otieno Kajwang when his shenanigans were questioned,for example, you can't help but laugh and not just at Mr. Kajwang's humour but also at the lightness with which he treats the matter. We have to acknowledge that as much as the minister has some discretionary powers, the technocrats (and they are by every measure)also have a role to play in the running of ministries. They are there to give expert advice to the PS and the minister, which advice the latter two have a responsibility to heed. They are there, not just to be seen but also to be heard.

Now, you and me know very well that these ministers will not only get away with this, but that they will go ahead and treat at us to more shenanigans. They will tell you they are 'breaking the corruption cartels' in their ministries and 'streamlining the running of these ministries with vision 2030 in mind'. We have seen this movie before, haven't we?

UrXlnc said...


first i want to say thanx. you would typically have gone for the jugular, but have instead composed an excellent factual and very thought provoking argument with perfect delivery on an otherwise delicate topic (if one is an ODM die-hard)

i will not waste your time attempting to justify my position or where you perceive my stand to be, i leave you to make that opinion correctly or incorrectly for now. if need be we will review it later, in the present circumstances it will probably come out as an excuse so lame it starts limping the moment i conceive it and will not live to maturity.

the thrust of my argument got hidden which is

are these guys questioning the method (i.e was procedure/tradition followed) or are they saying these ministers are disregarding due process. i sadly have no knowledge of this at this time, the information so far is rather spotty and not insightful enough.

as for kimunya there were a number of reasons put forward, i highlight two that resonate with me.

first he deliberately mis-led parliament on the position of GR. that was in extremely bad taste

secondly, parliament passed a vote of no confidence in the man.

the first reason is inconsequential and is nothing more than a guy passing bad air in a packed bus. it happens all the time

the second reason however takes a different dimension. kimunya and kibaki are first members of that house (parliament) and then whatever other portfolio they hold, you cannot remove house membership and keep the other. so either they respect the house and its formal/informal rules or have no business being members (pack up and go home - resign as MPs).

now whether the house was justified or not, had a score to settle, etc is another issue.

you do also recall kimunya was under a lot of pressure towards the end of 9th parliament to explain why he was continuing to drag his feet on the privatisation act which led to the delay of safcom ipo amongst others, but thats another story.

whether he was the worst Min of Fin i dont know, i dont really care, am looking for the best Ministers of any ministries. allow me to digress, even in schools the talk is of returning caning to deal with worst offenders. thats our mentality. we no longer talk of encouraging the best and awarding high achievers. we prefer to sink to and coalesce in the pits of hell stoking the furnaces for potential customers forgetting that moulding self discipline is a large spectrum starting on the worst end with capital punishment rising through the mediocre (no punishment/no award) right to the other top end where genuine improvement on previous performance deserves award and recognition and genuine excellence behoves that we do so.

long story short, i concur (but with some very minor reservations) with your second para and last para. No quarrel with me there.

UrXlnc said...

to clarify

spectrum of discipline, we spend too much energy (time, effort, resources etc) preparing the most vicious of punishments and forget to deal or better still instead of allocating more resources on the other end of the spectrum award and merit for genuine good performance which in turn leads to more progress. out of a class of 40 am not sure which elicits the most positive response awarding the top 15 or punishing the bottom 15. experience tells me, bottom 15 are always working out ways to beat the system at their own game, while top 15 are trying to improve themselves and those around them. but thats material for another post by chris which unfortunately was inundated and totally eclipsed by material largely off-topic

Anonymous said...

Sorry to digress, couldn't let this pass.

Ladies and gentlemen, this brilliant article by job(jukwaa) caught my attention and literally brought me to tears. The pictures in the original article aptly explain this sad state of affairs -perhaps more than words can describe.


While trying to analyze the implications of the recent directive by a stakeholder forum on Mau Forest that was launched by Prime Minister Raila Odinga, several complex political and economic problems came forth.

Complex land, water, timber, culture, politics and ethnic-based conflicts of various permutations and combinations arose.

Conflicts between the Maasai and Kipsigis, between the government and forest settlers, between the Kipsigis and Ogiek, between timber loggers and the Ogiek, between the government and illegal tree loggers, between forest peasant farmers and pastoralists downstream, between the government of Kenya and external governments sustained by the Nile river AND MANY MORE.

But one angle was particularly intriguing.

Unbeknown to many Kenyans, while the rest of the country was deeply immersed in the post-election crisis earlier this year, one commercial enterprise owned by a sitting Cabinet Minister was capitalizing on the security lapse, to penetrate Kenya’s gazetted forests and ruthlessly engage on a massive scale, in illegal logging for timber.

The Cabinet Minister’s timber corporation brushed with vigilant Ogiek community leaders and ordinary protestors deep inside the Mau East Forest as his loggers engaged in the destructive and illegal felling of hardwood forest trees.

In the unlawful Mau Forest destruction and human settlement, the role of illegal logging for timber and its global trade, must be examined.

Illegal logging within such forests leaves large tracts of clear land - and this (cleared land) becomes the very first incentive and magnet attracting mass forest settlement by humans.

Deforested lands by commercial loggers attract peasant farmers

The settled humans then engage in secondary forest destruction activities like charcoal burning and peasant farming.

Thus, we must get back to the primary problem which brings the humans in the forests in the first place - that is illegal logging.

This is one of the deadliest threats to the survival of the Mau and other forests. This is also the single biggest threat to the forest-dwelling Ogiek community’s survival.

Kenya’s laws prohibit logging of indigenous trees and also logging within gazetted forest lands.

However, reality has shown that these laws are largely tailored to excuse and allow unfettered logging and uninterrupted timber trade by Kenya’s top political families.

It is the government which regulates the timber industry through granting of either timber licences or concession arrangements.

The same government is tasked with the role of enforcing those laws and protecting gazetted state forests.

Nobody is saying that timber businesses cant buy their own tracts of land, plant their own commercial trees, maintain their own private forests and harvest their trees as they wish.

The only problem is the looting of Kenya's natural resources in the form of hardwood trees on gazetted state forests, then processing and exporting them for private profit.

A simple case of free access to national property then commercializing it for self profits, while grabbing more land in degazetted forests for further private use. This is what the leading political families have been doing.

Thanks to longstanding and carefully calculated political loopholes, forest destruction (which attracts human settlement) goes on unabated despite prohibitive laws and bans on logging.

The logging bans appear to have been enacted not to protect forests, but specifically customized to shut out competing small saw-millers who were beginning to challenge and compete with the politically connected large scale loggers.

The bans on state forest logging never affected politically connected large scale timber companies like: Timsales Timber (K) Ltd - in which the Kenyatta Family own substantial stakes represented by Uhuru Kenyatta; or RaiPly (K) - partly owned by Nicholas Biwott and the Moi family; or the partially state-owned Pan Paper Mills in Webuye.

Timsales and Rai specialize in destroying both Mau and Keiyo forests among others, while Pan Paper continues to decimate Mt.Elgon, Kakamega and Lugari forests, all for profit.

Timsales operates under several subsidiaries including Sokoro Plywood which runs a plywood factory in Elburgon.

It is worth noting a historic pattern - that shortly after inception of respective Timsales timber or plywood factories deep in wooded territories of the state, immediate forest surroundings quickly diminish followed by human settlement.

That has been the case in Elburgon, Molo, Keiyo forest, the Aberdares, and Mau forest. Similar patterns apply for the operations of RaiPly and other politically powerful timber mills.

These companies have permission to continue logging during ban periods, under the guise that they are TOO IMPORTANT for the national economy and the forestry industry.

Moreover, if you scrutinize the industry operations closely, you will notice that the supply of logs (raw round wood) to these select industries has been subsidised, i.e. allocated below stumpage price that could have been obtained with a competitive market. This allocation is regarded by other stakeholders in the sector as being unfair and grossly discriminative.

The bottomline is that these politically connected corporate loggers have mercilessly for decades, led the frontline destruction of Kenya’s forests like Mau and Keiyo, for commercial purposes (in unchecked ways), and in the process creating monopoly-like cartels protected by the state.

These politically connected timber companies are basically environmentally destructive, government protected and ruthless logging mafia entities.

These mafias will stand in the way of any genuine attempts to restore order and bring regulatory oversight in the management of state forests - the PM should be prepared to see their underhand works of sabotage as he embarks on trying to save the little that's left of the Mau forest.

Because illegally logged timber is cheap, the trade has long encouraged high-level corruption and tax evasion, which reduces national revenues and limits the resources available to invest in sustainable development.

Furthermore, illegal logging trade is often associated with money laundering, organised crime, human rights abuses (of Ogiek peoples and Kenyans in general), subsequent illegal human settlements (within the cleared forests), and as now likely, potential violent inter-ethnic conflicts.

All this illegal, and commercial-guided forest destruction has been happening under the Kenyatta, Moi and Kibaki governments. The Kenyattas, Mois and Biwotts must squarely take blame for this particular mess at Mau and all other Forests.

Their local timber concerns and foreign partners (importers of the illegally logged timber in China and the European Union (EU)) must also share blame for the destruction of not just Mau, but also the Aberdares, Mt Elgon, Mt Kenya, Kakamega and other forests. These exports target expensive tree species like Camphor, Cypress, Pine and Cedar whose habitat is particularly threatened.

These accomplices in the illegal timber trade (led by the Kenyattas, Mois and Biwotts), have negatively affected our; biodiversity, human health, water availability, power generation capacity, agriculture and pastoralism, livelihood of forest dwellers and the national economy as a whole.

Mau Forest destruction

When will the Kenyatta family, Biwott family, Moi family and their timber and logging interests (including China and the EU) pay for the destruction?

Most importantly, Kenya needs to revisit the period of political crisis following the flawed tallying of the presidential votes and SPECIFICALLY retrace the activities of Timsales (K), in which the Kenyatta family have a substantial stake, within the Mau Forest.

During the period, Ogiek community leaders reported (claims which have now been disseminated internationally) alarming operations regarding Timsales (K) Ltd.

In the words of an Ogiek elder;

"two Timsales lorries with timber-trailers, which rumbled through the forest, carried not only the chainsaw wielding lumber-crew, but also 20 policemen with automatic weapons, who were hired to protect the timber thieves and the harvested hardwood logs they were transporting"

It seems that the most famous heir of the Kenyatta family who is also Gatundu South MP, Uhuru Muigai Kenyatta, was busy detouring police to cover his company's illegal hardwood-logging activities (basically a mission of stealing state trees) deep within Mau and other forests, while the rest of the country was embroiled in deadly violence and arson.

Can Uhuru please shed some light into these allegations.

It wouldn't be surprising that while police could not even offer security to helpless civilian targets in neighboring districts during this period of unprecedented political violence, murders, arson and human displacement, Uhuru was busy using armed police for his illegal logging cum looting operations.

How insensitive, how self-serving, how exploitative, greedy and bloody-selfish is this kind of behaviour and attitude?

Though Timsales (K) Ltd had earlier - together with two other companies - been exempted by the government from the general ban on tree felling, the Kenya Forest Service (KFS), a newly established parastatal entity, which has succeeded the corrupt governmental forest department, stated categorically that since its takeover, no licenses for hardwood harvesting had been issued to any company.

It is pertinent for Uhuru to tell Kenyans why he felt it was in order for his family business to defy the KFS directive against harvesting hardwood from Mau Forest.

With the KFS ban, what was Uhuru’s Timsales (K) doing deep in the Mau forests as Kenya, especially Rift Valley, was burning?

Such acts reflect the greedy mindset of some people straddling the realm of leadership in Kenya, where money interests supersede life and death concerns.

What are such deadly and greedy fellows doing in Kenya’s leadership positions?

Prime Minister Raila Odinga’s Mau stakeholders forum will have not fully achieved its job if it does not comprehensively interrogate the commercial activities of loggers like Uhuru’s Timsales (K) in the forest. It is such company activities that encourage human encroachment of forests in the first place.

Fencing off the forest may keep off small intruders, what about the big corporate intruders that are always accorded police protection (while illegally logging) by the same government?

Kenyans need answers to these often hushed but important questions.

If Kenya is burning, yet sheer impunity and the general belief in business-as-usual approach to everything under Kenya’s sun, leads one to disregard laws and governmental agencies, in a blatant operation of illegal felling of thousands of Kenya’s few and near-extinct hardwood trees, under heavily armed police protection.....then little positives can work in Kenya. Now you can understand Moi’s previously common phrase “Kenya ina wenyewe”

When challenged with these damning facts last week (end of July, 2008), a representative of Timsales (K) refused to comment, and did not deny the claims.

Local Ogiek people believed that Timsales (K) was taking advantage of Kenya‘s political crisis to make a windfall profit from illegal logging of scarce hardwood trees.

We need to understand that after many years of commercial operations within Mau and other forests by these political corporations, what compensation do they have to help the government and ordinary people to restore the forest ecosystem?

As the Prime Minister is trying to gather stakeholders to prevent continued Mau forest destruction, where Moi acolytes like Isaac Ruto and the militant William Ntimama are inciting Kipsigis and Maasai sentimentalism respectively, the trailblazzers in the commercial forest destruction, like Moi, Biwott and Uhuru Kenyatta, are silently watching from a far.

Of course their timber and logging interests, and political stake are definitely well represented in the same stakeholders forum. That’s not to be unexpected.

The land left bare by the massive logging operations are now assuming new cover, apparently raided by new settlers who are also now engaged in fresh conflicts with traditional forest dwellers, the Ogiek.

Coffee seedlings, potatoes, onions, maize, beans, carrots, and other subsistence crops are replacing these cleared forests systematically. Other patches are left bare, others covered by gaping craters from soil erosion and charcoal-burning pits.

What a callous destruction of an important water catchment!

After the leaders in government fell the trees through their companies like Timesales (K) and RaiPly (K), they sought to cover and sugar coat their destructive acts (which often left painful eyesores in the forests), through ungrounded populist land policies.

After massively felling trees in the Mau forest for years, on February 16, 2001, the Moi government announced through the official Kenya gazette, the excision of 147,000 acres of Mau Forest for the purpose of settling the landless - on the destroyed logged zones. The political timing, a year before general elections must be noted

As you can see, the problem starts with illegal logging by the big political corporations like Timesales and RaiPly. After felling trees for money, they create politicized and patronage based distractionist policies - giving opportunities for invasion of previously gazetted forest by landless peasants.

Under Moi's populist plan, only few families were genuinely settled on the logged forest lands, before land grabbers and speculators seized the market.

This fatal policy decision removed approximately 70% of Mau Forest from the legal control of the Forest Act, leaving the land vulnerable to invasion. Land speculators and grabbers moved in quick. They did grab and began holding the land, speculating for future lucrative prices. That is until Narc came in 2003 to spoil the party.

Mau degazetted forest. Land grabbers and speculators
are fighting back government plans to reclaim endangered
forest land

DCs, DOs, PCs, politicians and police who had previously participated in the protection of the Moi, Biwott and Kenyatta logging businesses, and who were rewarded with forest land, panicked when Uhuru Kenyatta and KANU lost the presidential election in 2002.

Some quickly sold their holdings to unsuspecting peasant farmers (a process which began when Moi was still in office), with several illegal title deeds exchanging hands, but a good majority of the grabbers held them for speculation.

It is particularly intriguing when elected politicians (& not PCs DCs and police) are the ones involved in the subsequent transfers, give-away or cheap sales of the grabbed forest land to their electorate. They become instant vocal advocates protesting any suggestions of forest land evictions.

Isaac Ruto comes in mind, having been alleged to have settled Kipsigis peasants in Mau forest land that he grabbed after it was deforested and degazetted by political loggers (like Timsales & Raiply).

The new peasant owners may actually believe they have total rights to the forest land, with land ‘titles’ to boot, and are therefore flabbergasted when told that many of the titles are fake.

Undoing the damage becomes a complex and dicey subject, as the Raila stakeholders team has learnt, where the government is sometimes forced to charge the rest of Kenyan taxpayers so as to purchase alternate land for resettling these victims of deception.

What makes Prime Minister Raila Odinga’s job in addressing the Mau Forest crisis particularly difficult is not just the competing interests of the Kipsigis, Ogiek, Maasai, and political land speculators, but two other factors;

(a) the stark reminder of the inhumanely brutal evictions by Kibaki-Kimunya in Feb./March 2005.

(b) the continued, ongoing, secretive and state protected illegal logging in Mau Forest by powerful politicians which never seems to stop. I guess the politically connected timber companies have supplies orders and export quotas they have to fulfill.

The issue of inhumane evictions has been publicly addressed by the stakeholders team, the Lands Minister and Raila himself.

The team and Raila must now tackle the issue of continued illegal logging in the gazetted Forests of Kenya, paradoxically with police protection.

The government cannot be talking about stopping the destruction of forest ecosystems when the real culprits, the powerful timber loggers in government like Uhuru, still enjoy government protection as they continue to commercially cut down exotic trees.

« Last Edit: Today at 4:33am by job »

Anonymous said...

The Ngilu Scandal worsens. Corruption, neoptisim as seen in th Moi era returns as his henchmen return to goverment disguised as liberators.

The old ways are back. the Scandal of the Civil Service housinf Scheme. Bishop Wanjiru has bought the houses and now wants to sell them.

Corruption is alive and well in Kenya.

Anonymous said...

Chris, why dotn you spare a line and tell us about your hot ODM girls Ngilu and Wanjiru and what they are doing in their ministries?

Ama you are too mesmerized by their behinds to realize what they have been doing barely 100 days in their mnistries? the press especially the ODM standard are loudly silentbecause its their dream girls who have been caught with hands in the coookie jar.

mnajidanganya tu hapa ati mnapigana na ufisadi. ufisadi umepata roots ndani ya ODM. watu wana shiba nyinyi hapa tu mnabweka kama mbwa ati Kibaki oh kikuyu this and that.

ODM yajenga nchi. Kubafu kabisa

Anonymous said...

let us not air our makaratasi issues here. this blog is read by law enforcement ya chambele

Anonymous said...

ask wanjiru how come construction of the civil servants houses is continuing in a frenzy (drove past there this morning, work starts at 5am) although she claims the goverment has pullled out of the prject and is refunding the civil servants their cash (bila interest)

oh champions of transparency chris and the donkeys who populate this blog, ask the god Bishop who is this generous dude who has pumped money to finnish the nyumbas. While you aer at it, ask Ngilu what she did with the 300 million shilling water development cash in the Rv that has ended up in kitui. Ntimama too where he buried the 600 people (kales by the way before kyuk phobics begin to cheer) where he buried the bodies of your tribesmen, the rape for democracy thugs.

we are such a sorry nation. Kubaff kabisa. the mzungu should have stayed.

Anonymous said...

ODM true colours begin to shine. the murderers return to their thieving ways, Ruto, Ngilu, Nyongo, and Wanjiru

Ivy said...

Kalamari, Taabu, UR and other Anons, way to go folks. That is the spirit.
On a lighter note Kalamari even with the light on trust me the baby might just come. So even with the checks and balances we must be on guard and be alert on the happenings around us.
But still i concur with a blogger it begins with us. The buck stops with me, if i would be shouting on the rooftops about corruption because it is being done by one of us then i am still the same person who will give a traffic police 2000K to avoid going to the nearest police station for a very flimsy traffic offence then Ole wangu, we still have a long way to go but as the chinese said the longest journey begins with the first step...Am i willing to venture or launch out into the deep? Is the question.
By the way do we make alot of noise, just because we are not the ones eating?

Kimi Raikkonen said...

Vikii, well done. Could not have put it better myself. Your obvious intellect is way above many wannabe professors on this blog.
Kenyans need to understand that change begins with them as individuals and not with worshiping idols. They also need to know what change it is they want, not just heckling from Jan to Dec.

Anon @ 9.32AM. Should we be surprised?

Anonymous said...

Great post, Kalamari. And to the commentators, hongera. This is one of my best articles and commentry. By and large sticking to the issues. Am very proud to be a Kenyan at this moment.


Kimi Raikkonen said...

The ODM bash that never was

Published on 29/07/2008

Standard Team

The story of the big 2007 December General Election ODM victory party that never was can now be told five months after a peace deal pulled the country from the brink.

It’s a party whose planning was as elaborate and as discreet as it can get. And when it finally aborted, the impact was equally crushing for thousands of the Orange party supporters. They have spoken for the first time of the preparations.

The audacity of that hope and the deep disappointment with the outcome is captured in a beautifully framed portrait of party Raila Odinga clad in a blue suit and an orange tie with stripes of blue in two shades.

It’s captioned, "President Elect and Commander-in-Chief of the Armed Forces of the Republic of Kenya". Instead, in a Grand Coalition arrangement brokered by former UN secretary general Kofi Annan, Raila became Kenya’s second Prime Minister, a post founding President Jomo Kenyatta scrapped after he briefly held it at independence.

As the plan for the "big inauguration" was being worked on, so was an international guest list. Yesterday, ODM Pentagon members declined to comment, but the director of elections, Ms Janet Ongera, talked of the carnival that never was.

Press conference

"I was posted to KICC to make arrangements for our presidential candidate to come and witness the announcement of the results," she says.

"My job was to confirm the results and make preparations for Raila to come. We even had a portrait declaring him president-elect ready. Preparations to have him address an international Press conference at KICC soon after being declared the winner were also complete."

To deal with a looming transport crisis, secondary school head teachers in Nyanza had been approached to provide buses to transport supporters to Nairobi for Raila’s inauguration at Uhuru Park.

In Turkana, a disappointed group of elders cancelled a busaa party at Kipsongo slums. One of them, Nakuleu Epus, later said, "ODM had promised to eliminate poverty, I’m not happy."

In West Pokot, residents spoke of plans of a big party, "because Raila would have made Rev Julius Murgor, the Kapenguria MP, Minister of Internal Security to deal with rampant insecurity in the area and along the Kenya/Uganda border.

"Celebrations to usher in Raila Odinga’s Government were set for Makutano Stadium. A big bull was to be speared in his honour," Mr Joseph Wero Makumbi, a resident, said.

Big dreams

Mr George Wesonga, a DJ at a popular restaurant in Kitale, spoke of ‘a big party for the youth in the town". The restaurant had also lined up a series of live performances.

"My constituents had made elaborate celebration plans. There were over 30 bulls. Each village had donated two animals," Mr Joshua Kutuny, the Cherangany MP, recalled.

For Kutuny, it would have been a dream come true, "as I was a candidate for the Agriculture ministry docket. He added: "During my campaigns, voters referred me to as Agriculture minister and Raila assured them that I was heading to Kilimo House when he addressed a campaign rally at Sibanga."

Mosop MP David Koech says the ECK announcement nipped celebrations in the bud. He spoke of families and even whole villages that were ready to start partying.

"Like the masses who supported ODM, I’m still confused over the outcome of the presidential poll," Coast Kaya elder-cum-ODM politician, Mzee Pekeshe Ndeje aka Simba Wanje, says. He had to abandon plans of colourful traditional ceremonies lined up for Raila.

"Here you are expecting your expectant wife to give birth and the baby does not come out alive, do you celebrate?" Bahari MP and Coast Parliamentary Group (CPG) chairman, Mr Benedict Gunda, said of the abortive victory party. "I will now channel all the resources I would have used to hold the victory party to the education of students from my constituency."

Sheikh Khamis Banda, who campaigned for the Orange party in the Kwale region, spoke of plans for a huge party in Ukunda. It was to cost about Sh300,000 and up to 350 Imams from the South Coast had been invited.

But Banda, now an ODM nominated councillor at the Kwale County Council, says they had to call off the celebrations as confusion reigned. He added, "This cruel turn of events broke the hearts of party supporters. Some were inconsolable."

No job

Mr Joseph Ombok, a Kisumu taxi driver, quit his job soon after voting. "I was too excited to work. I’m well educated and I was driving a taxi because of lack of employment. I knew I would get a good job because my father is Raila’s friend," the crestfallen jobseeker, recounted.

Mr Manyala Keya, the Lurambi MP and Assistant minister for Gender and Children Affairs, observed: "What is important is for us to understand that the half loaf the party received in the Coalition Government cannot satisfy all of us in ODM."

This is just hilarious. I hope the ODMers have learnt their lesson well. NEVER put your hopes in individuals. You will surely be very disappointed when they don't deliver.

Ajwang' said...

I see some attempts here to belittle the roles of true Kenyan heroes from Central Province like Githongo, Kiai, Anne Njogu etc. This attempt is mostly from 'liberal' Mt Kenya bloggers, arguing that Kenya should not rely on individuals but rather on institutions. This does not hold any water. You may have all the institutions yo want, but if operators of those institutions do not have any cultural disgust for theft and deception, it will all be in vain. So yes, Githongo should come back and help Orengo, Nyongo, Ababu and other conscientious Kenyans dismantle corruption networks

Msema Kweli said...

Kimi Raikkonen, you just celebrate and gloat. Celebrate and feel good because the party never was ... This just to jog your memory and put things in perspective: The party never happened because Kibaki STOLE THE ELECTION. HE NEVER WON, HE STOLE THE ELECTION and that is why very many people who saw Kibaki STEALING THE ELECTION - right before their eyes - reacted with anger to this BRAZEN AND OPEN DAYLIGHT ROBBERY OF THEIR VOTE by THE 76 YEAR OLD THIEF CALLED KIBAKI AND HIS "DOGS" - AKINA KARUA, GICHERU, GICHANGI AND THE MT. KENYA CLIQUE THAT CONTINUES TO FLEECE AND ROB AND LOOT FROM KENYANS

Nyargine said...

Kimi and other anons

If you cared enough to read the comments, you must have realized that we have all taken a chill pill and...trying to move on.
Trust you to spoil the party by reminding us about
'parties' that have long been forgotten.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, you may now proceed.

Anonymous said...

By the way I support Kajwang' in ignoring the advice from technocats. I work in an African country - (not Kenya of course). I put it my tax claim and it took 3 - yes Three years of being tossed from one civil servanat to another. I then wrote to the minister of finance telling him I was a legal foreigner and I dont know why I cant get my tax refunds according to the law. The minister did not call me. I was adviced to check my bank within one week. Sure enough - the money was there. You see now? I did not bribe the minister a bit.

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