Hi Chris, I composed this for my beloved Kumekucha. Hope you will have the courage to publish it for the bloggers to unwind from the complex politics of the land. Cheers mate.
It's that time of the year again when we dish out the gongs and oscars to those well deserving Kenyans.
1. Crime of the year- MPs refusal to pay taxes. It doesn't get more sickening than this when other Kenyans are starving to death due to high cost of living. What an axis of evil this bunch is!
2. Slumber of the year- It's gotta be prezzo. The mzee likes his peace so much before making any statement that when he opens envelopes containing various problems facing the country, he finds the problems long fixed themselves naturally .
3. U-turn of the year- Ruto for opposing the Waki report as... "shoody', i"ll timed', blah blah, them embracing it saying it should be fully implemented. Aha, talk of Saul being converted on the way to Damascus! What's the catch?
4. Scandal of the year- The man made maize shortage whereby some top political dogs of war are making billions to a point of changing our nation's staple diet of Ugali. Don't expect any heads to roll.
5. Hypocrite of the year- Step forward Hon Ababu Namwamba of the box haircut fame. Very vocal in calling for an official oppostion, yet goes into hiding when asked about paying all his taxes. Politicking 24hrs a day, when Budalang'i people are drowning in floods right up to their eye-balls.
6. Event of the year- Good Old Kibaki being sworn hurriedly at night as 'duly elected' without pomp and colour.
7. Reformer of the Year- Hon Justice Phillip Waki for handing out a lifeline to Kenyans to end Impunity. Watch how this chance will be squandered!
8. Speech of the year- Hon Dr Khalwale on impeaching Kimunya. "To end impunity, Kimunya must go! To clean up the treasury, Kimunya must go! To arrest rampant corruption, Kimunya must go! Your wife can't give birt... Kimunya must go....."
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9. Minister of the year- Michuki asiye na chuki. For steering finance and environment dockets with charisma, dignity and pride.You can't please everyone but at your age, you are doing well
10. Worst minister--- You guessed it right--Chirau Ali Mwakwere. Road carnage is back, Matatu madness is back with many screening porn at night. It's all hell on the roads compared to Michuki's era yet this minister pockets a salary of Ksh 1,000,000 per month-- for doing----- absolutely nothing! Nice job if you get it.
11. Villain of the year- Step forward Bwana Kivuitu. Still getting huge pay despite the botched elections. How does this man sleep at night?
12. Puzzle of the year. Who is on the Waki's secret envelope? surely aren't they doomed despite the posturing?
13. Export of the year: Power sharing Kenyan style. It's being shipped to Zimbabwe, DR Congo..etc
14. Steal of the year: Moi's Range Rover worth Sh20M despite having all the tracking devices according to the police. You gotta salute those who pulled it off....
15. Man of the CENTURY! Our very own Barack Obama for thinking and executing the unthinkable! You did us proud son.
16. Blog of the year. Kumekucha for being steadfast, fearless and frank.
What say you? Do you agree with me? have your say....
Has Obama not stopped smoking?
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