Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Some Want Private Info, Others Are Asking If I've Run Out Of News

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Some Kumekucha readers would like to know more about me while others are of the view that when I start getting personal it is because I have lacked something to talk about.

My training tells me that when the personal is included in the writing of serious analysis (like I have done today with my main post where I mention the personal example from the time I lived in Dar-es-salaam) it makes for even more interesting reading. And the reason why most readers are flocking to this site in increasing numbers is because this site is an interesting read. Still Mr anonymous-have no fear, I do not own a cat so I will not start talking about the feeding habits of my pets here. That's surely not Africa, is it?

Still my view on this matter will not carry the day. I will say what Kenneth Matiba loved to say. Let the people decide.

Whatever the view of most of my readers, please bear in mind my security concerns, which are quite real. And by the way being out of Kenya does not mean that one is safe. But make ni mistake about it, I am not scared and this inconvenince is a price I am happily paying so that one day my children and grand children (and yours as well) will be glad that I lived and that I did what I am doing.

Father and son seduced by the same woman called "death."

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Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Where Does Kumekucha Live?

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This blog is read by some very smart people. The sort of guys who make me proud to be Kenyan and give me hope when I am at my lowest. I would never dream of telling them lies. So to clear the air here are a few facts about my current and past location or abode.

- For security reasons it is not in my best interests to reveal my current location or when I moved there.

- Until last month, I lived in a certain Kenya town for over 8 months. Nairobi is not the only place to live in Kenya and besides it is also not the best place to gauge the true state of affairs in our beloved nation. Now when most Kenyans still live in rural areas.

- It is true that I have not been to Nairobi for about 3 years until last weekend. Didn’t miss anything did I?

- I have been away even longer from the Rift Valley.

- However I have my trusted people countrywide whom I am in constant touch with to guarantee my readers a very true picture of what is going on. I also visit many areas in Kenya on a regular basis, irrespective of where I may be based currently. So the comments I make about encounters are 1000% TRUE.

- Technological wonders like the mobile phone and the World Wide Web make it viable for me to write very authoritatively from almost any remote area of Kenya.

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Is The Weakest Link In The ODM Council Of Elders Fred Gumo?

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I have said this before and I say it again—Kenyans have very short memories.

When I first received news that the chairman of the so-called ODM council of Elders was one Fred Fidelis Gumo, I was shocked. Shocked because I know the guy. Hope do I know him? The way you get to know a public figure. Which is by their actions and antics, especially away from the political platform.

What would you say about a guy who walks into some back street bar and drinks with aides and then on being presented the bill, slaps the waiter and leaves without paying. His side of the story; the bill was incorrect. My assumption is that the reason that he did not even pay what he considered to be the correct bill was because he wanted to punish the waiter. Incidentally the bar where this happen was not very far from another bar that was made famous in the late sixties when a full cabinet minister got so drunk that they left some confidential government documents in some dingy bar where they were drinking. That man was James Gichuru. But at least the late Gichuru remembered to pay his bill before he left.

Now my question is, would you trust a person who can’t pay his bills at some dingy bar to help decide the next president of Kenya?

Hon Gumo’s stories don’t end there. There was a time (in 1997) I believe when a lady returning officer announced the results for the Westlands parliamentary seat in which she said Gumo had lost. In full view of witnesses, including journalists, Hon Gumo slapped the woman. Shortly after that different results were announced in which Hon Gumo had won. His famous slap has achieved much for this guy.

So what can you tell about such a person’s character?

There is a view that is gaining increasing currency that the recent so called leaking of confidential presidential documents happened with the full knowledge of Hon. Fred Fidelis Gumo.

And even if it did not, the buck stops at his chair.

I believe we all need to keep our young friend Jonathan Mueke, standing in Westlands against this guy in our prayers. (Read the interview he gave Kumekucha HERE). Mueke has said that he has a strategy to deal with his well-known violent tactics but anything can happen when this burly politician is around.

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Jeff Koinange Speaks Out For The First Time About Date Rape Allegation

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Former CNN Africa Bureau chief Jeff Koinange has broken his long silence and given an exclusive interview to a UK website where he denies the date rape allegations leveled against him. He also denies bribing anybody to get his infamous Niger Delta dramatic story.

However in what appears to be a contradiction, Jeff is quoted by the web site as saying; "I've let my wife down... I've let the people who care about what I do down." It is not clear exactly what the former CNN reporter, known to always choose his words carefully meant by this, but it seems to be an admission of the date rape that he denies in the same statement.

An interesting possible coincidence is the fact that the site is owned by a company whose non-executive chairman goes by the name of Mike Turner. The major shareholder of Jeff’s previous employer has a similar name in Ted Turner.

Read the full story HERE.

Read more evidence contradicting Jeff Koinange’s latest statement HERE

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Monday, June 25, 2007

Late Extra

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I have just received word that there was a young jobless man at the Hilton Bus Stop, Nairobi, this afternoon urging Kenyans to reject ALL current MPs in the forthcoming elections for pocketing Kshs 850,000 every month for the last 5 years while 85 per cent of Kenyans starved.

I am thinking of launching just such a campaign in this blog. What do you guys think?

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Where Is Kumekucha?

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My sincere and humble apologies to all my regular readers who have missed me since Friday. Sorry for any anxieties caused and let me assure you that I am fine and now truly back and at your service as always.

When I flew into Nairobi shortly before lunchtime (Kenyan time) last Friday, it was the first time I had been to the so-called city in the sun for over 3 years. I then ventured deep into the beautiful Rift Valley where I have been missing from, for even a longer stretch of time. Alas, I was not able to pause at the place called "View Point" to take in the magnificent floor of the Rift Valley because there was fog that was so thick that even Matatu drivers were not overtaking (can you believe that!! A matatu failing to overtake a slow moving vehicle ahead of it!!)

Part of my mission in the Rift Valley was to witness a young man from the Akamba community all the way from Machakos negotiating vigorously for a Kikuyu beauty to be his life partner. Truly there is hope for Kenya. One day love amongst all Kenyans will be completely blind of tribe. The man succeeded but not before some anxious moments including one dramatic point in the negotiations when the Kikuyu elders demanded a hefty five-figure fine because the man who had eloped with their daughter had taken too long to come and inform them of what was happening.

I cannot of course fail to mention the high point of the whole ceremony which was when the master of ceremonies asked both parties (at first a little nervous of each other) to sing the same song but in each other's language. That is the Kamba sang in Kikuyu and the Kikuyu sang in Kamba. Of course the Kikuyu find the Kamba language melodically amusing while the Kamba's sometimes have a problem with the heavy Kikuyu R's instead of the L's that they are more used to. Still it worked and it broke the ice. My only regret is that I did not have a video camera to capture the whole thing.

Sadly that is about the only good news I have to report from my trip. The rest is all bad news. Kenya is indeed on fire and all my worst fears regularly expressed here proved to be uncannily accurate. It became very clear to me that as we hurtle towards the rapidly approaching general elections, there is need for those who believe in prayer to double their efforts in asking for divine intervention to take our great but badly limping nation through a very difficult time.

I was fortunate enough to be chauffeured around very comfortably most of the time by people who had to make some sacrifices to make the whole thing possible (and for that I am very grateful to them). Still I did manage to enter a matatu or two (the best place to feel the pulse of Kenya, first-hand). I could not help noticing the desperate faces. The lack of smiles that I at least occasionally saw the last time I was here.

Hopefully the tree we planted deep in the heart of the great rift and for which you my dear readers had to sacrifice by persevering my absence for the whole weekend, will one day make its' small, tiny, contribution to the healing of Kenya.

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The Terrible Things Kenyans Will Do To Get To Parliament

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Financing Some Thugs To Cut Off Some Innocent Guy's Head For You To Get To Parliament Is No big deal

As I talked lots of politics with all those I met on my trip over the weekend (some of them very seasoned observers of Kenya for many years) it became clear to me that this time round there could be some major problems with the election ballot papers. The truth is that they will need some very clever designing to accommodate all the candidates. It is possible that in many constituencies we will have more than 50 parliamentary seat candidates.

The important question to ask here is; why has Kenyan politics, as dirty and murderous as it is, attracted so many? The answer should be obvious.

Being an MP gives you a monthly income of close to a cool million and numerous perks, including a free house and a duty-free car. Maybe Samuel Kivuitu should start a campaign with the following theme;

Jishindie Nyumba Ya Bure
na loan ya kununua Hummer.
Rarua mshahara ya karibu shillingi millioni moja, pesa taslimu.
Guaranteed for 5 long luxurious years.
Tafuta kiti ya Ubunge


Translation: Win a free house and a loan to purchase a Hummer. Get a salary of close to a million shillings guaranteed for 5 long luxurious years. Grab a parliamentary seat.

In other words numerous Kenyans countrywide are plotting on how to get to the August house come what may. Some will take huge loans and even bigger risks to get to parliament knowing full well that if they make it, life will never be the same again. Not for the folks they will be representing but for themselves.

You can see how the current proposed constitutional amendments have been designed to prolong "the honeymoon" of the current MPs into February next year. They don't even mind delaying the elections so that they continue reaping the fruits of being an MP in Kenya for as long as possible.

So where does that leave the ordinary Kenyan desperate for change, desperate for something to cling on as hope for the future?

But even more worrying is the fact that this desperation to get to parliament will help contribute to what I have long predicted will be the most violent general election in the history of Kenya. The first time I made that prediction over 6 months ago, I really upset a lot of you who labeled me a warmonger. I wonder what you will say this time when all I said then is unfolding right before our very eyes—not that I am happy about it.

Let us be brutally honest here. With the kind of perks waiting for MPs in parliament, many parliamentary aspirants will not hesitate to commit murder to get rid of any perceived obstacle to their objectives.

Indeed this is already happening. Some months ago a curious murder was reported but ignored by most, which took place close to the heart of Machakos town. Well-dressed men entered the house of a man who was widely tipped to be the next MP of the area and engaged the wife in a friendly conversation. Some of their colleagues waited at the gate of the home. When the owner of the house arrived from work, he was shot dead and the men left without taking any cash, although they had earlier asked the man's wife for the six cell phones they knew were in the house, probably to distract her from their real mission. Nobody has been charged in connection to this particular murder to this day.

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Friday, June 22, 2007

Countdown Elections 2007: It Is The Season Of The Political Entrepreneurs

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Did you know that Kenya boasts of professional campaigners. Yes, people who lie low and quite and then emerge every 5 years to earn some fabulous incomes helping barely electable people get elected.

I am reliably informed that we even have International players who completely took advantage of a certain prominent presidential candidate. The guy who was telling me this story exaggerated it a little and added much spices (what would life be without a little spice) that made me laugh.

He says that this presidential candidate almost swooned when he saw “mzungus” sweating on his behalf in a room full of TV sets tuned to different TV stations and people trying hard to “look busy” making print outs of so-called political and voter analysis. He was overheard telling an impressed parliamentary colleague; “this is my think tank,” (pointing to the mzungus

Sadly after 4 years of this think tank where this candidate must have spent a fortune of hi later father's money, what does the candidate have to show for it? Zilch in my opinion.

The problem of course is that mzungus don’t understand Kenyan politics that is why one wrote in the Financial Times of London that Kibaki will easily be re-elected. These are the times I feel like borrowing words from some of the most abusive commentators in this blog.

I would prefer a local think tank any time.

Incidentally I know a guy who was member of the legendary Moi think tank. He was as local as they get and that team (paid peanuts) did some amazing work getting Moi elected in 1992 and 1997. Of course they also played dirty and did many crazy things inluding the famous Kanu briefs where they dug up dirt about certain key challengers and published it in that newspaper. Dirt sells and the Kenya Times, I am told had sales surging. And I believe the candidate in question lost credibility because they ended up third, after Kenneth Matiba in 1992.

But they also got it wrong in a way. Because that time they concentrated on attacking Mwai Kibaki only for the upstart maverick Kenneth Matiba to energe from nowhere to be the major challenger. There are those who believe (including this blogger) that Kennneth Matiba won the presidential elections in 1992.

Well, let all those professional campaigners and think tank consultants emerge out of the woodwork and make their money. Although it will be much harder this time round with an electorate that has wisened up considerably.

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Intruder Hacks Into Marianne Brinner’s Site And Changes Content

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Marianne Brinner is my friend and I have no apologies to make for that. I do not find it funny that some hacker could take advantage and find a way to hack into her site. These are the “animals” we live with in cyberspace who must be strongly condemned.

Here I reproduce a statement from her explaining the whole situation…


Statement From Marianne Brinner

I know that there are many rumours circulating since the access-address of my blog Distantlovers.blog.com/ had been mentioned in media-reports and statements around the world and when people wanted to enter had to find out that this name is now referring to a somewhat funny blog which even looks quite pornographic.

The reason is quite simple: I first thought that somebody had taken advantage of the publicity of my blog and when I deleted it for just 2 days, registered his own blog under the same address.

But I have been told in the meantime that this matter is quite different: somebody has 'hacked' into my blog, published some funny things and is now occupying my space and name.

Blog.com has offered to find a solution and has registered my blog under a slightly different name. So take note: it is now http://distant-lovers.blog.com/ (difference: this 'dash' in between).

I have already sent a new post informing people that I am at the moment putting together all the details for a book on the whole Jeff-Koinange-Saga which will come out in the States either at the end of July or at the very latest at the beginning of August.

I will also continue publishing some details in my blog. So please look out for it.

I hope that this will serve to erase any question and doubts - I wish to apologize for any inconvenience and hope that this will not happen again .......

Marianne Briner


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Thursday, June 21, 2007

Much Talked About Third Force Takes Shape As Kalonzo Tours Mukuru Slums Hand In Hand With Uhuru

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It could not have happened at a better time. Now those of you who were laughed off and jeered when you shared the Kumekucha analysis on the forthcoming elections have your chance for revenge because chances are that you will meet those guys who laughed at you this weekend.

The news is that Kumekucha has been vindicated and the third force is taking shape right before our very eyes.

Uhuru has now said it all in a thinly veiled threat that was loaded like crazy. He said that even he can form a new alliance if ODM does not play ball. And then we see him tour the Mukuru slums hand in hand with one Kalonzo Musyoka. An interesting aside here is that these slums in the heart of Industrial area, Nairobi have Mukuru Kwa Njenga, Mukuru Kwa Ruben, Mukuru Kwa Ng’anga etc. Interesting names don’t you think?

Anyway, during the tour Kalonzo (always the fence seater, to the last minute makes some good noises in favor of ODM-Kenya) so what was he doing with a Kanu guy at this eleventh hour in the game?

Mark my words, if you want to be a good political analyst, listen to politicians but always digest their utterances with a good pinch of salt and try and read between the lines and always remember that their actions speak much louder than any words they may utter.

But in all my analysis I overlooked one possibility that became very clear yesterday. That Kalonzo’s party (still in the briefcase but soon to emerge) would form an alliance with Kanu rather than Kalonzo having to troop back to “mama na baba.” Let me also remind you all before I forget that the person who first predicted a Kalonzo-Kanu alliance right here in this blog was Kalamari and he deserves to be credited for it. He saw it coming even before I did.

Just to remind you of my earlier analysis, this Kanu coalition/pre-election alliance actually will be the one to watch, because it has positioned itself perfectly to benefit both from the inevitable fall out in ODM and the one in Narc-Kenya. Of course it is strictly not Kanu because it is clear that remnants of Kanu will remain in ODM led by one William Ruto. Now this gets really interesting because word on the street is that Musalia is in this Uhuru alliance while Ngilu will join forces with ODM-Kenya. The reason why I say it is interesting is because Mudavadi’s action means that the Luhya vote will be split three ways with each of the three parties getting something. Ngilu’s action means that the Kamba vote will mostly be split two ways—one half each to both ODM and Narc-Kenya. This is a wonderful thing because it will greatly dilute tribal tensions, emotions, sentiments and voting patterns and force most of the electorate in the affected areas to analyze the candidates individually rather than based on their tribes. This is great news for Kenya.

The mover and shaker and chief strategist behind all this is of course “Baba Gidi”. Ignore this mzeeat your own peril.

Of course the big and very exciting question is can this “contraption” wrest away victory from ODM-Kenya?

Now I hear you ask; Why didn’t I mention Narc Kenya? The reason is that this Uhuru “contraption” is Narc Kenya’s worst nightmare. Whatever armchair analysts say, the Mungiki thing has greatly dented the president’s support in certain areas of Central province especially the expansive Kiambu and parts of Nairobi. The re-entry of Uhuru as a major player in the forthcoming elections can only make things worse. The truth is that most of the votes that Narc Kenya loses will go to the Uhuru alliance. Let me also remind you all that I believe the presidential candidate in the Uhuru alliance will be one Kalonzo Musyoka.

If we can keep violence out of it, there is no doubt that is going to be one of the most exciting political contests in the history of Kenya. It is just sad that we will be mostly recycling the same two-timing greedy two-faced politicians back into office though.


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Site Tells Mungiki Story Better Than Anybody Else

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The Kenyanlist site has done something that no other site has been able to do. That is to bring to us the reality of the crack down on Mungiki in pictures. Pictures speak a thousand words and the amazing quality photographs on this site have done just that.

I have said it here before that the people who have suffered most from the Mungiki crackdown are innocent Kenyans whose only crime was to be poor and have to live in areas like Mathare. I reproduce some of the photographs here but please follow the link below and visit the site for yourself for more pictures that tell the story I have been trying so hard to tell here in so many words. Just ask yourself what if it were you and your loved ones, your mum etc.?

These photographs need no captions;







See more pictures at original site

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Wednesday, June 20, 2007

What Were The Intended Objectives Of The Leaked Dossier?

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Was The Leaked Dossier Itself “Cooked” To Achieve Certain Objectives?

Yesterday I gave you the views of my better half but today I will move on to mine. This is concerning the so-called leaked ODM dossier.

Let us start by agreeing that voting patterns have changed significantly since 2002 and to base any research on how Kenyans have voted in the past is a little dangerous. I believe that voters have grown much wiser in leaps and bounds since the times of "Kibaki tosha."

Secondly I agree with the readers who say here that the figures were "cooked". As they say, figures can be used and "tweaked" to prove anything. More so where it is claimed that William "YK’92" Ruto is at number 2 in the projected presidential votes.

What makes me even more suspicious is the fact that the latest Steadmann polls already in the hands of newspaper editors have not been released. Is there anybody putting pressure on them not to release them? According to my sources, the latest poll puts Raila Odinga at No 2 after the incumbent. KM is of course at Number 3. Still as I have often said here before, something about the Steadmann polls made me lose faith in them early on and I am yet to change my position on this (if ever).

I wonder what it did to Ruto to see his name at number 2 on the much publizised dossier published on the front page of the Sunday Nation? I mean the figures would suggest that he was just a breath away from the presidency. I am sure he dreamt of long motorcades with motorcycles riding next to his limousine. What would he not do now to win the ODM-Kenya nomination?

Interestingly in view of the 40:40:20 rule in ODM-Kenya (which gurantees Kanu a 40% share of the party), there is just an outside chance that if the delegates system were to be used, Ruto on paper would look like he has a decent chance of winning, especially in the absense of his party chairman Uhuru Kenyatta. But in the game of politics what is on paper is almost always very different from the reality of things.

I also agree that the buck stops with Hon Fred Gumo as far as the alleged leaking of the report is concerned.

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What Is The Role Of NSIS In An Election Year?

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Many readers here have repeatedly stated that removing an incumbent from power in Africa is very difficult.

One of the reasons why this is so true is because the presidential team has the benefit of intelligence reports from the shadowy NSIS (National Security Intelligence Services) which covers the entire country.

As you read this the incumbent has a pretty good idea of the possible voting patterns on the ground in every constituency in the country. In other words taxpayers are paying for President Kibaki’s campaign.

This is one of the reasons why predictions sometimes are so difficult to believe. I now have two different sources who have predicted that the incumbent will lose these elections. One is a man whose predictions have been spot on since ‘92.

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Kumekucha appreciates Vikii

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Vikii my man thank you for your considerate remarks on Mrs Kumekucha. I will share them with her when I see her next and I am sure they will bring a smile on her face. As for the man who left an abusive comment while hiding under the shadow of being anonymous, I would like to say that I have left the comment intact as a constant reminder to all of us about the many cowards walking around in trousers.

My view is that Vikii’s comment is a perfect example of mature debate where you can disagree without being offensive and thus leave room to get your points across. I keep on repeating that this is precisely the reason that made the Greeks such a great nation and it is something we Kenyans must learn.

Having said that I am grateful to all you frequent readers and commentators in this blog, because we have come a long way and today it is a joy for anybody to read most of the non-abusive and very well thought out positions expounded here, which quite often overshadow the main post. Hongera Wandunga na wadada wangu.

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Tuesday, June 19, 2007

What Mrs Kumekucha Thinks Of The Leaked ODM presidential Analysis

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My wife hates politics with a passion and rarely wants to discuss it. Which would sound a little strange to most of you readers out there who know me as the political animal who talks politics here daily. I guess the thing about like poles repelling and opposites attracting in romantic relationships is so true because one of the things I have been blessed with is an amazingly happy marriage. I've now been married for slightly over 20 years. We've had our ups and downs of course (especially in the early years) but today I look back at one of the best decisions I ever made in my life.

Now a few minutes ago my wife was doing the unthinkable-discussing politics with me. She had a warning for me (this is a private conversation and you should censor a lot of it if you are going to write about it in that blog of yours.) Still let me share with you a little of what she had to say;

The Sunday Nation controversial ODM analysis that computes possible votes with each of the presidential candidates is 1000 per cent accurate because of one obvious fact that nobody wants to discuss. Very few Kikuyus would vote for Raila Odinga no matter how good he is. And Kikuyu influence is strong in the country in virtually all provinces and no candidate can afford to ignore it. To put it in her words; "It would take God for Raila Odinga to be president of Kenya." (Coming from my wife that is a very heavy statement because she is a Kikuyu from Kiambu and she is the sort of person who treasures facts over hearsay. Incidentally she always says journalists-including her husband publish too much hearsay and very little in the way of facts. Anyway, long time readers of this blog will know why most Kikuyus have this unfortunate attitude towards Raila. It really isn't their fault. Many younger Kenyans who were not around then hate it when I say this but IT IS A FACT and I am going to say it yet again. The reason is the years of deliberate anti-Luo propaganda by the Kenyatta administration.)

The reason why the United States is such a powerful and successful nation today can be traced back to its' foundation. The nation had a very firm foundation as a Christian nation and there have been many presidents who were born-again Christians (including the current one President George W. Bush). Our country, Kenya needs a serious born again Christian President to steer the nation in the way of God almighty. "Righteousness exalts a nation…" The moral decay and godlessness we see in America today will lead to her downfall.

Even American presidents who were not born-again Christians looked to God for strength, answers and solutions to pressing problems. She gives the example of the curse believed to have been instigated by the Native Red Indians of America which caused every president elected in a year ending with zero to die in office right from the 1800s. The long list of presidents who elected in a year ending with zero dying in office includes famous assassinated presidents Abraham Lincoln (elected 1860) and President John F. Kennedy elected in 1960. However the curse was broken during the Reagan administration when he invited well-known servants of God including deliverance ministry and curse experts like Derek Prince into the White House. They advised the president accordingly and the curse was broken and just in time too because Reagan himself was elected in 1980 and shortly after the curse was broken, there was an attempt on his life which he survived only because the curse had been broken. (Check out the facts yourself, there is a search engine box on this page at the top.) In the same way, the current Kenyan president and the next one should seek divine help because many of the problems facing the nation today can only be solved with a lot of help from God.

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Why All ODM Supporters Should Read William Shakespeare's Julius Caesar

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As I have said so many times the stakes this time round are very high. But to make matters worse, chances are pretty high that the next occupant of State house will be from a party called ODM-Kenya.

And this is the reason why all ODM-Kenya supporters should read William Shakespeare's classic political play Julius Caesar. Even those who have read it should re-read it to stay alert to the machinations and serious back-stabbing that has been going on within ODM for a long time now.

Let us use this classic play to explain to you exactly what recently happened at ODM that resulted in a highly confidential presidential campaign research document ending up as the front-page splash of the Sunday Nation. The research showed computed votes that each ODM presidential candidate was bound to receive in the event that they won the ODM presidential ticket. Fr hose who missed the story the presidential candidates ranked as follows in order of projected votes;

Kalonzo Musyoka - 53.4% (Win for ODM)
William Ruto - 50.8% (Win for ODM)
Raila Odinga - 50.5% (Win for ODM)
Uhuru Kenyatta - 48.6% (Loss for ODM)
Musalia Mudavadi - 47.4% (Loss for ODM)


Here is the short play to illustrate what happened recently;

Cast

(Main characters)
Julius Caesar: Raila Odinga
Mark Anthony: Kalonzo Musyoka
Brutus: Certain prominent Luo leader within ODM
Main schemer: Prominent ODM personality (not a presidential candidate).



Scene one;
(Schemers are meeting at a secret location)
Main Schemer: We need you to help us out with this plan. You know that if Julius Caesar stands for President we will lose because there will be a split in the party. You also know that he is adamant that he is the only one who deserves the crown.

Brutus: I am aware. I will help you, but what do I get in return?

Main schemer: Don't worry I promise that you will be taken care of.

Brutus: Get serious. Are you trying to do an MOU on me?

Main schemer: Okay. There will be some cash compensation.

Brutus: Plus a cabinet post. If you renege I will send minutes of this meeting to Kumekucha, should make for some very interesting reading.

Main schemer: You have a deal. Who is this Kumekucha guy anyway? Okay I know your contacts with the press are pretty good that is one of the reasons why we chose you. Just remember that it is important that nothing is traced back to us.

Brutus: So what is the objective?

Main schemer: The whole idea is to use figures. Kenyans now really believe in them after the Steadmann polls.

Brutus: You expect these figures to cause Julius Caesar to give up the crown?

Main schemer: Are you an amateur in politics or what. In this game things don't happen suddenly. This will just be the beginning of our putting pressure on Caesar to give up the crown for the candidate most likely to deliver victory and power to us. And also the candidate that will be easiest for us to control and manipulate. Caesar is too strong-headed. When the people see that he is a distant Number three and that Mark Anthony is actually much more popular than him, even some of his staunchest supporters will start to have doubts. All we need is for them to have doubts. Our second and third phase of the plan will do the rest.

Brutus: Now about that cash…




Scene Two:

Rome is in shock as Sunday Nation article reveals "research findings" on top presidential candidates and claims; "ODM strategists secretly back Mark Anthony..."



Scene Three:
(Caesar is on his cell phone with Brutus)

Julius Caesar: It is me Agwambo.
Brutus
: Hello Mr President.
Julius Caesar: (Very angry) Don't Mr President Me, you backstabbing Ondieki (Hyena).
Brutus: Now what is the problem, Agwambo?
Julius Caesar: Have you read today's Sunday Nation?
Brutus: What in particular.
Julius Caesar: Just answer my question.
Brutus: (nervous) I was going to call you.
Julius Caesar: Cut the cr** Brutus. I am just shocked beyond words that you would help my enemies.
Brutus: What are you talking about?
Julius Caesar: I know my enemies well, but I never imagined in all my worst nightmares that… Even you Brutus? Then let Caesar say that he has no friends.

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Monday, June 18, 2007

Is New Crime Wave In Malindi Linked To Mungiki?

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A curious incident occurred in Malindi on Saturday night. Thugs attacked some premises and after shooting a night watchman, felt it necessary to also slash them on the face as well, before they damped the body into a nearby swimming pool.

What attracted my attention to this incident are reports that I have been receiving from my reliable informants in the Coast region who say that Mungiki remnants fleeing from Nairobi have pitched camp in areas of Mtwapa and there have even been a few incidents where they have extorted cash in the area for "protection". Mtwapa is the North Coast dead on the road to Malindi. I have been asking myself all day, could there be a link between the sharply increased crime in Malindi and the reports of Mungiki-like strangers in the region? I pray not.

Another area where numerous Munigiki adherents are hiding out is the Mariakani area, also in Coast province.

I pray that I am wrong and that the information I have received is somehow exaggerated. Either that or the security forces should move with lightning speed and nip in the bud any sign of Mungiki trouble at the Coast province. Those who understand the coastal region will know that the area is too sensitive at the moment with increased extreme poverty and impatient, jobless youths. Any Mungiki activities just now would be akin to throwing down a burning cigarette onto a floor that is already flooded with petrol.

Which brings me to the next question. Are the police and our intelligence services aware of where remnants of Mungiki fled to? And if so what are they doing to pre-empt any ugly resurgence of what we saw in Kiambu? The reason I ask is that too many times this current government and the security agents under its; command have been caught flat-footed. The result is that we have constantly and repeatedly found ourselves in situations of crisis management, and yet all the trouble would have been so easily avoided had action been taken earlier.

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Is Killing Of Kenyan policemen In Somalia Linked To Bomb Attack?

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In yet another curious incident, two Kenyan policemen were abducted and later found dead in Somalia close to the Kenyan border. Some people believe that it was remnants of the Islamic courts militia who fled Mogadishu who were responsible for the muirders. It seems to have been some sort of revenmge attack against Kenya.

The truth is that Kenya has made plenty of enemies in recent times and this incident is worth taking a closer look at in view of the recent Nairobi bombing incident.

There are some enemies one cannot avoid making. However it is worth asking why Kenya has no clear foreign policy to date. Incidentally this is one of the things that Mwai Kibaki's opposition criticized the Moi regime for promising to put the foreign department in order if and when they took over the reigns of power. Will they did take over in 2002 and ended up adopting Moi's policy on the matter.

Having no foreign policy is akin to being a neighbor who is unpredictable and does not appear to have a clear idea of who they are and what they stand for. One day they ask you turn on the music high because they like your taste in music, the very next day they complain to authorities that you are a nuisance in the neighborhood.

The next government needs to have a very clear foreign policy which they can explain to the public and one which we can all understand.

Back to the killing of the policemen. Happening at about the same time as the bomb attack, one can’t help wondering whether they may just be related.

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Controversial Predictions On Kenya Elections 2007 Available Only Via Email

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It may be difficult to imagine it, but there are some articles that are just too hot and controversial to publish even in this blog that has built quite a reputation.

A good example of this is a widely circulated email containing some astounding predictions on the winners and losers in the forthcoming general elections. There are some predictions contained in it that are just too sensitive to publish here. However you can get a complete copy of the widely circulated-via-email predictions by subscribing to my popular weekly email newsletter Kumekucha Confidential. It is free and all you have to do is send an email Now to:
kumekucha-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

You will have to reply to the automated response to confirm your subscription.

Naturally if you are already a subscriber, you do not need to subscribe again.

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Kumekucha Being Read In Matatus

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Today I received a message from a Kenyan residing in Tanzania telling me that he is an avid reader of this blog and read yesterday's posts on a web-enabled mobile phone while traveling in a "dala dala" (that's what they call matatus in Tanzania). He said that he especially enjoyed yesterday's amusing post about private telephone conversations in public places.

While Internet-enabled phones are a very common phenomenon in the West, I must admit that I was a little taken aback that it should be available in Africa and inside a matatu at that. Alas, these are just part of the rapid technological advances in which we now find ourselves in and which most of us can hardly keep up with.

Interestingly not too long ago the then CEO of a locally based web business predicted that the time is nigh when people in a matatu will all be busy surfing the net on their way home or to work.

Let me admit that I seriously considered editing out that part of the interview article at the time, because to me this was just too wild a possibility that would surely not happen in the next two decades at least and by then, who knows if Matatus will still be around? Somebody recently gave me a very convincing thesis of how we will all be flying around in some rocket-propelled personal gadgets. Wow!!

It seems that I was very wrong about the "surfing-in-matatus" prediction because it is in fact already happening and it is only a matter of time before it becomes much more widespread. Remember how cell phones used to cost Kshs 250,000 the first time they arrived in Kenya and could only be owned by prominent thieves of public funds and corruption czars? Now mobile phones are a basic necessity even for mama mboga..

However I foresee a few problems. We all know what kind of sites most schoolboys and men visit (a friend insists that the line dividing the two is too thin for comfort hence the similarities in bizarre tastes). Can you imagine the explicit images of people in various positions of the act and the moans and "animal noises" that go with it filling a matatu where at least half the occupants are drunk and trying to get home? It's not a pretty picture I can assure you.

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Saturday, June 16, 2007

Predictions On Election Results Against What Is Happening Behind The Scenes

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Last night 2002 presidential elections runner up Uhuru Kenyatta officially pulled out of the ODM presidential nominations by missing the deadline to present his nomination papers.

Readers of Kumekucha can't have been too surprised at this development. It is just further confirmation that Kanu has different plans for the forthcoming elections even as ODM insiders struggle to ensure that the oldest political party in the land remains within ODM.

The ODM high command hastily accepted the 40:40:20 demand from Kanu and immeditately welcomed two more Kanu members into the highest decision making body of the party. The demand by Kanu that they field their own parliamentary and civic candidates was however rejected. If you remember this demand was at the core of Uhuru's damands because, as he put it, Kanu has to retain its' identity and not get swallowed up by this giant animal called ODM.

So! What next?

It seems that it will be difficult for Kanu to avoid splitting into two different camps. Those who will remain in ODM and those who will go back to "mama na baba." Any possible coalitions will only be formed after the elections and after the constitution has been amended to allow for them.

It seems that the splinter group that will remain in Kanu will be led by William Ruto and the one that will leave will be led by Uhuru Kenyatta. The big question analysts are now asking is which group will be more powerful?

Now I know that I am talking to a lot of ODM diehard supporters, but ladies and gentlemen let us put away our party affiliations and emotions for now and analyze the situation coldly. By the way, that is the only way you can get to be a good political analyst because this is really not the place to drum up support for your preferred presidential candidate.

To answer the question I have just asked, we need to look at Rift Valley soberly. Who will stick with Moi and Uhuru and who will go with Ruto? To be honest that is a very difficult question but I think it is fair to agree with what most analysts say, which is that Moi and Uhuru's group will consist mostly of older Kalenjins and will be weaker. This had better be true because after the Narc and ODM nominations are completed, Kanu will gain a lot of strength from the rebels who will come trooping in from both sides of the divide. Actually whatever you think of Kanu, those guys are smart. That is why they exploited and robbed us blind for over 40 years. Kanu has positioned itself perfectly to gain a lot of power from both Narc and ODM.

Let me remind you of what happened in 2002. It is a fact that many of the defections from Kanu that year could not stand NAK (The Kibaki-Wamalwa-Ngilu axis.) However they had no problem joining Raila's LDP. Just think of many prominent parliamentary candidates who may end up missing nominations in either Narc-Kenya or ODM. The vast majority will not be comfortable crossing to the other party and anyway those parties will already have completed their nomination process. Mark my words, Kanu nominations will be carried out last and they have the perfect excuse, because the circus in ODM and Narc Kenya will continue until the 11th hour which will be the perfect timing for Kanu to withdraw and go it alone.


N.B. At least two separate predictions so far (one from a pastor and genuine man of God who has always got it right since 1992) say that President Kibaki will lose the forthcoming elections. However it is the second prophecy which has been widely circulated via email and is from a man I don't know which has caught the eye of many. According to that prediction the presidential race this time will be very close between two candidates (President Kibaki not included) that it will be difficult to say who the winner will be. But even more interesting, they predict that Kanu will re-emerge as a very strong political force. The political situation currently is very fluid and anything can happen, but this prediction seems to confirm what is going on currently behind the scenes with Kanu, which I have reported here, in great detail.

I know there are a lot of you guys out there who are rabid Kanu-haters but it seems that this will be the party to watch, at least now and for the next few months.


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Very Private Cell Phone Conversations In Public And The Surest "Migration Ticket To The West"

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Anybody who crisscrosses from the West and comes back to Africa frequently cannot help but notice the huge difference in culture, but more so the rapid rate at which Africans are catching up and falling over themselves to ape a culture that they don't quite understand.

I was in a crowded Cyber Café in the city the other day, when a young attractive lady (too young to in my opinion, to be having this sort of conversation) received an International call from a man who must have been her boyfriend. It was obvious that she was rather uncomfortable after the opening Ahhhs and Ohhhhhs and "I've missed yous". After that the conversation went on very stiffly, It went something like this;

I would like that too…

Me too…

Same here…

I also need it…

Even me

You see the way our current generation thinks is very differently from the more conservative older generation closer to the age of their parents.

But at some point the girl just got totally frustrated and something must have snapped up there somewhere deep inside that pretty head and she decided that she didn't care what the rest of us in the place thought. She unleashed it all.

"…You know when you're in love with somebody and you miss them, it gets so lonely, especially at night." she said in her heavy accent (will not dare mention which tribal accent).

"I think about you all night and imagine that I was in your arms."

The older people around could not help but exchange furtive glances. The young girl stepped up the game.

"If you have made love to any other woman, I'll kill you..(loud laughter)."

At this point a man stood up from his computer with pained expression on his face. I will never know whether he had finished his business or cut it short in protest. I went on working on my Kumekucha post for the day, 3 work stations away from the young lass while totally being entertained by the rest of the conversation which consisted mostly of loud laugher (sounded more like a high pitched shriek to me.)

It struck me how this kind of "escape plan" is on the increase all across Africa. In Dar-es-salaam about two years ago I met these two young men at a cyber carefully crafting an email to a lonely woman somewhere in a far off country and it struck me how eager one of the men was to get married as soon as possible (which is unlike men anywhere in the world but was obviously for the convenience of leaving the country to settle in that far off land with a woman they most likely did not love).

I have also met many women of all ages in Cybers across several African capitals trying hard to connect with "their ticket" out of the poverty and hopelessness of Africa).

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Friday, June 15, 2007

The Big News In America Is Not About Jeff Koinange

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As we go into the weekend, the big story on most TV channels and other media across America is about the famous CNN International.

As most of you readers will know Americans have no interest whatsoever in Africa and that is why despite the fact that Nigerian newspapers and websites have been talking about this story since the beginning of the year, it was only after the sacking of Jeff Koinange that they sat up and started paying attention. Finally the right questions over what really happened in the Niger Delta are being asked. Some are even pointing to other controversial clips exclusively captured by the CNN in the past in places like Iraq.

As pressure mounts, CNN is now expected to release a statement soon on the reason why Jeff Koinange was fired. But you can be sure that the big story is in the question everybody is asking and which some have already answered; In Jeff's alleged admission in an email that he paid to get his big story and "fame" how true is it that CNN were fully involved and aware all the time?

Jeff's email said;
"Of course I had to pay certain people to get the story. But everything was done in agreement with CNN and in accordance with their usual standards. But you do not get such a story without bribing . . . You have to have financial resources. But at the end, it was worth it. CNN has its story and I have my 'fame.'

The American media is also asking questions about Marianne Brinner and who she really is and what is so special about her despite her age that a young desirable man saw. And not just any man, but a famous man who probably had scores of younger women all over the world swooning over him whenever he made an appearance.

The saddest thing about this whole encounter is not the fact that the reputation of Kenyan men is in tatters. It is actually about a woman who is a Kenyan hero by any standards.

Few Kenyans realize that for years Ms Brinner has been the lone voice and has continued to fight single-handedly and at great risk to her life for the truth to come out concerning the death of the best foreign minister Kenya ever had, the late Robert Ouko. This was at a time when everybody else (including Raila Odinga) had lost interest in solving this murder (did he make a deal with Moi or what?) Brinner has not told the world about the threats she has had to endure all these years because of her stand concerning the Ouko murder. Not to mention the inconveniences she has had to go through.

…And for what? She’s not even a Kenyan.

Just because she gave her word to the late Dr. Ouko when he was alive that if anything ever happened to him she would not rest until the whole world had gotten to know the full story of what really happened.

Does that sound like a gold digger and whatever else she has been called by men who have no interest in hearing the whole story first? Marianne herself has admitted that she is no angel, but what does her previous liaisons with a few prominent Kenyans (as revealed in the emails she herself released and none of which involved rape) have to do with the current case?

Oh and I forgot to mention the fact that she is not receiving a penny from the sales of the book on Ouko—her co-author has taken over all the rights to receive the royalties and has not passed on a single penny to Ms Brinner yet.

I’ll tell you what Marianne’s real weakness in all this is. What has exposed her so badly. It is her truthfulness and determination to tell the truth even when it paints her in a negative picture. That in a world where everybody tells lies or at least lies of omission when it suits them is what has done her in.

If you read some of the emails she has published in her blog you will notice that she has not left out her equally explicit comments and writing which would suggest that she was a willing participator. She has not left out anything to make her look good in all this. That is what hurts me so much. The truth is that she was raped by a person she had come to trust. The truth is that the same person reneged on the out of court settlement they had agreed on which included supporting some girls in a Jo’burg home for orphaned children and that's how the emails were published online.

In the other post today (read it here), I reproduce a new statement from Ms Brinner that reveals new facts for the first time about the alleged date rape incident in London.

Many readers have begged for Jeff's side of the story. Let me inform them here and now, that Mr Koinange is not picking up his telephones (both mobiles and landlines) and neither has he used the comments section of this blog (which is still open to him) to defend himself. Nay. So far he has only been defended by strangers who want to cling on to the image of that nice young man on TV at all costs and have shut out their minds to any other possible side of the most famous Kenyan journalist.

P.S. In her interview with an American newspaper yesterday Ms Brinner revealed that she had received an email from a person she has reason to believe is Jeff Koinange. It was brief and to the point and said;

"the vengeance is mine, says the Lord... I will repay you…"

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Marianne Brinner Gives More Details On Date Rape Incident

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What Really Happened on That February 20th Night?

Yesterday in a lengthy interview with an American newspaper date rape victim Marianne Brinner revealed new details concerning the said incident in London.

Today I reproduce her statement in full, which emerged from that interview here. The same statement was also sent to a leading South African newspaper that is covering the story.



"Here is a summary of the assault details because I think that this is such an important issue that I do not want to have any misunderstanding about it. I hope, you read this before making your final article.

Especially since I am sure that Jeff will tell the whole world that I agreed on having sex with him etc. etc. -

It started on February 20 after I had arrived in London. Jeff called me in the afternoon and then came to my Hotel (Holiday Inn Forum Plaza) around 6.30 pm. He had announced that we should meet in the Lobby, take a drink, talk a bit and then go out for Dinner.

So I dressed up for dinner, nice and elegant. But he came just wearing black trousers and a black sweater (a little bit like the MEND people in his Nigeria Report). I made a remark to this asking if he was really seriously thinking to have Dinner with me since as you may know, the London top restaurants have quite a strict dress-code. But he assured me that his outfit was ok 'why, what's wrong with what I am wearing?'

We then talked for about an hour, sitting in the Lobby, sipping a glass of wine (we really both had just one glass each - so alcohol is not the excuse for what happened later). Although I should have been warned: In the middle of our conversation (about the Nigeria Report, his problems with the CNN lawyers which were still going on also in London, and about people we both knew in and outside Kenya etc. etc. - he all of a sudden stopped and said 'I want to make love to you - now....' - I started laughing and did not take him serious, teasing him 'you are crazy - have you forgotten, we have a date to have dinner together ....' - and he again: 'but I am 'ready' - now....' - But then he changed back to our former conversation and I felt 'safe' again .....

But all the time I felt quite 'overdressed' and told him so and said, I would rather prefer to go to my room to change into some 'less fancy'...

He agreed and asked if he could come up also since he wanted to call 'his people' to see if everything was ok .... I told him to give me 15 minutes so I could change before. And then I made a big mistake: I had two passes (these security cards to use the lift and to enter the rooms) and I gave him one ....

I was still in the bathroom since he entered already after about 5 minutes - but I was wearing a housecoat - when he opened the sliding doors of my bathroom, pulled me out telling me 'not to be shy with him' - and then the big shock: he was already totally undressed..... he pushed me on the bed, and in seconds tried to enter me ..... I struggled and asked him several times to stop this - but he forced himself into me and that's when he has hurt me ..... he held my arms down and started kissing me (maybe he wanted to stop me from screaming) in a very brutal way ..... he saw the pain in my face since he even made the remark 'Did I hurt you? Do you have pain?' - I started crying and begged him again several times to stop, but he only said 'I can't - so just let me 'finish' ---- and continued. Every move he made was like a knife was going deeper and deeper in me cutting me apart.... it was horrible.

When he finished - yes, he even had an orgasm - he turned around and for about 3 minutes was lying on his stomach next to me without saying one word. I was still crying, shocked and devastated. And still without a word he got up and without washing himself put his trousers on and then even called - like nothing had happened - his people, chatting and laughing on the phone. He then turned to me 'sorry, but I have to go' and off he went.....

I stayed for a while in my bed wondering what I should do ...... then I saw the blood on my body and on the bed sheets ...... and I had only one thought: to 'wash away this dirt' so I took a shower and stayed under the water for more than half an hour…

I tried to call him the following day since I did not hear anything from him - but he had switched off his cell phone and in the Hotel (Kempinski) they always told me that 'he was not available'.

But now comes another thing which I have not spoken about yet: As I said, he had the 'pass' to my room since he took it with him and I always feared that he could come back in the middle of night..... and it came out that he really tried on the second night: After I had already sent the letter to CNN and he started to call me again, he asked if my daughter liked the DVD's he had left in my Hotel for her ..... I did not even know what he was talking about and he told me that he had come to my Hotel but the Night Concierge stopped him and he then left an envelop for me with these DVD's and a note at the Reception. I wrote to the Holiday Inn and after some days they confirmed this and apologized for not having given it to me when I checked out that morning. They then sent to me the envelop by DHL and besides the DVD's (about Darfur, Somalia and Oprah's School) it also contained a handwritten note by him saying that he came after having done a live interview at 4.20 am for Anderson Cooper 360 ....and that he had been very busy - working day and night .....and then he also attached the 'pass'…

I know I have made many mistakes - the biggest was to trust him - then the others to give him the pass and allow him to come to my room - but again: I was trusting him ..... like he had always told me 'I will never hurt you - everything will be done mutual - I have never forced a woman to have sex with me - I respect you too much to ever hurt you ..........'
I should have been warned about his intentions when he said in the Lobby ' I want to make love to you - now - I am 'ready'…

- and that's also one of the reasons why I did not go to the Police - I started to blame myself for having been so stupid…

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Thursday, June 14, 2007

The Real Power Of Kumekucha And The Internet

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Before you move on to today’s juicy post about Kanu’s secret presidential candidate, I have something very important to say.

I will not bore you with the details but one of the major realizations by top thinkers about the web is that the real untapped power of the Internet is in getting thousands or even tens of thousands of people to work on the same project at the same time, giving in their input. So instead of having one person doing all the thinking you get thousands of intelligent experts working on the same thing.

Many people do not realize it, but that is exactly what we have been able to achieve here in Kumekucha. Although I have some sort of track record in political analysis as some of you readers claim, the truth is that I am NO authority. However when you get dozens (and the number is rapidly rising daily) of different contributions from other “experts” out there, a keen reader is able to read through it all and arrive at a very accurate analysis of politics in Kenya. Naturally this sort of thing cannot be done on a newspaper page.

If you look through recent posts you will see many instances where the really valuable information has come in through comments from our regular readers rather than the main post.

We as Kenyans are at a very dangerous cross roads in our history. But this time we have something going for us. In the past, it has been impossible to read between the lines and see what our leaders are really up to. But thanks to the web, that will change this time round.

It is my hope that this strategy will be enhanced here especially as we enter the discussion in the next post which I believe is an area where the next president of Kenya will be decided.


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Kanu Games And The Carrot Dangling Mystery Man Who Wants Kalonzo Back In The "Mama Na Baba" Fold

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To tell you all the truth, I was very shocked to receive the news about the new alliances taking shape within Kanu and ODM-Kenya. Had I not verified certain facts within the story with at least two separate sources, I would have left out the story altogether like I have done with so many other hot tips I usually receive on a daily basis.

I am not afraid of being proved wrong and there are certain facts that have emerged that are contrary to what I previously thought and even wrote about here. I was wrong about the following;

Kalonzo Musyoka’s popularity:
My impeccable information shows that Mr Musyoka for a reason I still do not understand (Kenyans probably just love fence-seaters) has sizeable support countrywide. When that support is combined with the Kanu network and its’ bulging purse strings, it will make Kalonzo a formidable presidential candidate for Kanu. Please note carefully (especially those who rush to make comments without reading through posts) I have not said he is a good presidential candidate or good presidential material. I am simply reporting on his support on the ground as of this moment.

Yes, it is Kalonzo Musyoka I was referring to yesterday.

There is yet another assumption that many Kenyans are making. And that is the fact that if we were to get two opposition presidential candidates to stand against Kibaki, the incumbent would easily romp back into Sate house. Thois is an assumption carried over from the Moi days. Kibaki is NOT Moi.

Let me remind you why Baba Giddy is such a formidable opponent. For 24 years he received daily briefings from the intelligence service. And that is after serving for almost half a century as an MP with many of the earlier years covering the entire Rift Valley province. I do not need to remind readers of this blog that information is power, especially in the current information age.

All this makes Baba Giddy a walking encyclopedia on Kenya. It also means that his calculations are bound to be correct. They were also very accurate in 2002, the only problem that happened was the unexpected where Raila led other leading and ambitious Kanu politicians in giving up their personal ambition to back Mwai Kibaki. Since most of us agree on the fact that Baba Giddy is the chief architect behind the re-birth of Kanu, you can be sure that he has double checked his arithmetic this time and chances that Kalonzo may just wrest the presidency from Raila are very high. (What I like most about Raila supporters is that you will never see them using abusive language in this blog. They will always quietly and soberly debate their point of view without losing their heads or getting emotional. Congratulations guys on being “Ancient Greeks”.

In a three-horse race of say Kibaki, Raila And Kalonzo, the biggest loser will be the incumbent. Raila already has his power base which is Luo Nyanza (almost 100%) and then very strong support in parts of the populous Western Province, North Eastern, Coast, Nairobi and even a respectable following in Rift Valley. Kalonzo’s power base is Ukambani in Eastern, followed by sizeable pockets of support in virtually all provinces in the country. It is unlikely that any Raila support will end up with Kalonzo, however Kalonzo’s candidatire will take plenty of votes that would have gone to President Kibaki had he not stood. This is what Kalonzo supporters have been saying for months and based on evidence that I have received, I now admit that they are right. Remember that the presidential election is a numbers game.

The big problem with President Kibaki’s votes at the moment has to do with the recent Mungiki issue which has done him irreparable damage in the populous Kiambu district and environs, including Nairobi. That leaves him badly bleeding within his own power base of Central province. And although he still has the majority of the support from this, his home province, any political analyst will tell you that what has happened is a very bad omen for any candidate. You don’t lose support in your power base that is just too dangerous. The problem with other parts of the country is that I do not see any influential tribal chiefs on his side. Meaning that if elections were to be held today the two front-runners would be Raila and Kalonzo, assuming Raila is the ODM-Kenya candidate and Kalonzo the Kanu candidate.

One thing I must add is that there are certain parts of Kenya which will not vote for President Kibaki but will also NOT vote for Raila, thanks to years of anti-Luo propaganda. Those votes will also go to Kalonzo.

In brief folks, my research on the ground reveals something that I have been reluctant to accept all this time. The fact that Kalonzo Musyoka in Kanu will be a formidable opponent. I dare say he will be the man to beat (and not the incumbent as we have all been convinced for a long time.) Raila Odinga too is an experienced campaigner and has almost the same chance of winning the presidency as his archrival Kalonzo has. I thgink it will be a very close race, but one of these two gentlemen will be the next president of Kenya.

Notice that both these two candidates have succeeded in winning serious funding for their campaigns. Most of Raila’s cash is coming in from South Africa and Kalonzo’s recent windfall is from a mysterious local financier that is yet to be identified although my strong suspicions are that it is Baba Giddy and probably Giddy also.

Ladies and Gentlemen I am convinced that barring something very unexpected happening that is how we are going to go into the general elections.


How you can make a fortune from online conference calls to anywhere in the world

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Vote for a fellow Kenyan today because when he wins, Kenya wins

Online Conference Calls And How You Can Make A Fortune

Special Opportunity Feature From Kumekucha

Now, why in the world should online conference calls interest you? Good question. My suggestion is that you stick around and hear me out. This article based on this ordinary sounding topic could change your life forever in the next few minutes.

Conference calls have been around for a long time but now online conference calls have opened up brand new opportunities that are already turning the world, as we know it upside down.

A conference call is simply a call where more than two people can converse with each other on the same connection. Conventional conference calls have always had a number of disadvantages. High on the list has been the cost. Now the Internet has not only brought that crashing down but has also made a number of other brand new features available. Like Video and IM (instant messaging) capabilities amongst many others.

There are a number of websites and online companies that provide Internet conference call services, but let us for a moment consider the exciting new opportunities that this technological development has opened up.

Firstly many businesses that were previously unviable have suddenly become very hot. For instance many types of consulting services have always been a very difficult business to turn a good profit from. The great distances that separate potential clients around the world limited options. The best most experts could do was to try and write and publish a book. Now suddenly you can organize regular conference calls on the Internet with dozens of potential clients scattered all over the world and the options you have are now so numerous that you'll get dizzy just thinking about them. They range from charging a small fee for people across continents and scattered all over the world to participate in the conference, to using a free conference to sell one-on-one consulting or to promote books and even special reports that you can easily sell online.

But even old traditional businesses have been made easier and much more profitable by conference calling on the web. A real estate agent can get on a conference call online with video capability from the beautiful garden of the house they are selling and take his audience through a tour of the house while fielding questions. The session can end with bids and offers being placed for the property. So instead of taking the time to show 50 different people around the property, an innovative real estate agent can now do it once and reach all 50 while they are in the comfort of their offices and at the same time. WOW!!

Motivational speakers no longer have to wait for the big event to rake in their money. A daily web conference call with 200 paying clients can have quite an impact on the profits of the companies those clients represent and on the motivational speakers' bank account as well. Dare I add that they don't need to stop at 200 and can easily accommodate 2,000 or more in a few hours every morning.

Dating services are already cashing in on conference calls online, which they now use to hold virtual meetings online where people can meet and explore the possibilities of a more serious liaison while still in the safety and comfort of their homes.

Those who make their money from holding specialized conferences and charging participants can now reduce their rates substantially while increasing their profits in leaps and bounds. Gone is the intricate planning and hundreds of small details involved in booking hotels and flights and then confirming and re-confirming them. Not to mention juggling the most convenient dates for all those who need to attend. Now the conferences can be held more frequently and those interested can enjoy it from the comfort of their offices or homes.

These are just four examples but the truth is that virtually every business you can think of can find a very profitable application of online conference calls. One just needs to be a little creative to open the floodgates of opportunity and profit using this wonderful new feature that has been made possible by technology.

In fact the whole world is truly your marketplace now and you certainly don't have to be a Fortune 500 business, thanks to cheap conference calls now possible on the Internet.

Would You Help A Fellow Kenyan Beat Mark Burnett (creator of survivor and apprentice)?

Kumekucha has a weakness for helping out fellow Kenyans in a worthy cause. Guys, I think we should get behind our horse here. His fitness program is great. If Kenyans don't support him who will?


Kenn Kihiu

Dear fellow Kenyans and Friends

This little Simba is up against some big giants and it's so easy to help him. All it takes is a mouse click to vote for my fitness video. I’m competing to have my fitness workout featured at a national fitness conference called IDEA which is world's largest association for health and fitness professionals. If I gather enough votes and win, the exposure will be invaluable, open incredible doors and be huge for my career.

I’m currently in 2nd place and up against industry giants who have millions of marketing dollars but underestimate the support of the wanainchi. I have a legitimate shot at the #1 spot with your help. It takes about 10 seconds to visit the link below and click "Vote Now" http://www.danceXfitness.com/VoteNow you can vote every 24 hours, so vote today…tomorrow…until June 20th when the contest ends.

You can also receive great fitness tips by signing up via the link http://www.dancexfitness.com/voteforkenyan it’s a great way to be reminded to vote again. For the next 30 days, I will send you FREE health and fitness tips and strategies that will guarantee you will achieve the body of your dreams. Even if you do half of what I will tell you over the next 30 days, you will loose the belly fat, tone up, be healthy and have an abundance of energy.

Every click helps. Please forward this to fellow Kenyans, friends and family I would really love their support and also through my tips I will get a chance to help achieve the body of their dreams.

Click http://www.danceXfitness.com/VoteNow to Vote

Asante and Thanks for your support
Kenn Kihiu

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

ODM Presidential Candidate being Wooed By Kanu

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Wewe unajua Kanu, wewe?

We all witnessed with fascination that Kanu delegates’ conference at Kasarani at the beginning of this week on Monday, although the impact was lost to the bombing incident in the city.

Kanu finally showed us their cards and dropped them on the table. However what we really have to be careful about (as the late VP Wamalwa Kijana used to say) are the cards that are still hidden under the table because they are the really dangerous ones.

My brief investigations has unearthed something that is so unbelievable that if I did not have the track record I have, you would have all dismissed it and walked out. But that is the way Baba Gidi practices his politics. He thrives on big surprises. Let me take you back briefly to 2002. A few months before he announced that Uhuru would be his preferred successor, I read the signs and told some colleagues exactly what was going to happen. They kept a straight face but behind my back laughed me off as some crazed guy. Uhuru Kenyatta the Kanu presidential candidate? That has to be the joke of the year.

Well we all know what happened.

But now the Kanu high command has already secretly arrived at a presidential candidate and it is not Uhuru. Interestingly this man was having a lot of problems raising funds for his ongoing presidential campaign just the other day, but then suddenly he now has cash coming out of his ears and is aggressively campaigning countrywide (currently seeking an ODM ticket for the presidency). However he knows and Baba Gidi knows that he is going to stand on a Kanu ticket. There is no proof where the cash has suddenly come from for this guy, but I am sure you are betting like I am on the same horse. Baba Gidi of course, the man whose hold on Kanu politics continues to be firm. The man who is believed to be one of the richest men in Africa.

In other words the third force I have been talking about here for so long has finally started taking shape. It will be Kanu.

Already we know that the oldest party in these shores will field parliamentary and civic candidates (that is the card that was played above the table). But mark my words, the party will also field a presidential candidate. This man who is currently in ODM (that is the dangerous card still hidden under the table).

I give you up to tomorrow to do your own research and figure out things, tomorrow I will reveal his identity. I will also do an analysis of his chances of winning on a Kanu ticket. You will be shocked because I will prove that they are pretty good.

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A Radical New Law That Will Help Heal Kenya

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As one of our regulars Taabu always puts it, our current constitution is a “cut and paste job” from Britain’s and a little from the United States. Even the constitutional amendments that have recently been suggested are not at all creative but designed specifically to get certain individuals into State house.

It is instructive that former Constitutional Review chairman Yash Pal Ghai’s attempt at some real; creativity that I believe would have worked very well (creating a prime ministers office and clipping the powers of the president) was rejected by most of our current crop of politicians who did not want to think beyond the ordinary.

Yet it should be clear that no "cut and paste job" will solve our problems. We need to create laws that are aimed at our unique and sometimes ridiculous problems in Kenya.

Now there is a constitutional amendment here that can tremendously help our bleeding nation.

Why not pass a law ensuring that in the next 50 years (10 terms) we get a president from 10 different tribes of Kenya to rule us? That would mean that the Kalenjin and the Kikuyu tribes will already be disqualified from fielding a candidate this year. Apart from the incumbent of course who would be allowed to seek re-election. However if the presidency passes on to a Kamba candidate or a Luo one, then Kambas or Luos will be disqualified from seeking the presidency again for the next 50 years and so on.

I am aware of just how radical this idea is, but desperate times call for desperate solutions. The new law would force us to form alliances and to start looking over our tribal fences for political unions and support. It would help kill the tribal demon in our politics.

I believe 50 years of this is enough to rid of us of some of the most rabid political tribalists the country boasts of currently. But alas, we know our current crop of politicians would never even think through such a suggestion. Most of them are “cut and paste” adherents.

Maybe, just maybe the 10th parliament will surprise us, pleasantly that is.

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Tuesday, June 12, 2007

What Was Nairobi Bombers 'Real Target'?

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Today's edition of the East African Standard claims that the Nairobi bomber was possibly targeting the airport. This is an assumption from the fact that the Citi Hopper that (the man said to be Arab origin) was intending to board shortly before the explosion went off, was headed to the airport.

My personal opinion is that this is highly unlikely. If you were planning to do something at the airport, would you take a matatu there? That is highly unlikely. The whole purpose seems to have been to detonate the bomb inside the matatu. That is what bombs inside public commuter vehicles are usually supposed to do. Many more lives would have been lost had the man boarded the Citi Hopper. In fact chances of anybody surviving inside would have been close to nil. As it was by some miracle the bomb went off in an open space with various obstacles around which limited the number of casualties. (I agree with Phil—one of our regulars here in Kumekucha when he says it was a miracle that the bomb killed only one person). But whatever it was, it was a powerful explosive device because at least one building front in the area was badly damaged.

My view is contradicted by an alleged police report that I have published in the next post. Please read it and tell us what you think.

What is it with terrorists and Kenya? Why Kenya? How do we come into whatever quarrel or cause they are fighting? Of the 5 serious terrorist attacks that have happened in East Africa 4 have been on Kenyan soil (with 3 in Nairobi). The 4 in Kenya were the Norfolk Hotel Bombing in the late 70s, the US embassy (had the highest casualties where over 200 Kenyans lost their lives), Kikambala hotel in Mombasa and the latest incident. Kenyans should be very angry with these guys. What share do we have in the United States government? Is Kenya a colony of the US?

Terrorists, give us a break, how are we involved?

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