General Ogolla: Why Raila had to skip funeral and other untold secrets | Kenya news

Sunday, January 20, 2008

What Kind of a Person are You?

There many ways you can use to determine what are some of your major strengths and/or weaknesses. Hundreds of books and numerous sites use many ways different ways from questionnaire, to IQ tests, to handwriting, to how you dress, talk, the kind of things you like, etc etc. But the best and the most reliable is by how you fart. I can confidently tell you that the description of how you fart is one of your major character traits.
Here are the different types farts that we have ... where do you fit?

Shy farters- those who let out silent farts.

Clever farters- Those who fart and cough at the same time.

Miserable farters- Those who cannot fart.

Dissappointed farters- Those who's farts do not emit odor.

Dishonest farters- Those who fart and then blame the dog.

Mean farters- Those who fart in bed and shake covers over spouse.(this is not recommended)

Vain farters- Those who love the smell of their farts

Amiable farters- Those who love the smell of others farts.

Strategic farters- Those who fart and smile at the same time

Acute farters- Those whose fart smells and indicate their recent diet.

Confident farters- Those who let out really loud farts.

Scientific farters- Those who bottle their own farts.

Nervous farters- Those who stop in mid farts.

Honest farters- Those who confess their farts.

Foolish farters- Those who keep their farts inside.

Unfortunate farters- Those who start to fart but poop instead.

Insecure farters- Those who compare their fart quality to others.

Jealous farters- Those who claim the fart of others.

Prompt farters- Those who always have a fart ready.

The farters farter- Those rare farters whose farts clear moving vehicles.

So where do you belong?

5 comments:

  1. Sayra,

    I am sending you a bill. We have really laughed and our ribs are aching so much that we probably need to see a doctor.

    Nice, one girl.

    By the way you didn't tell us which character fits where.

    -Kumekucha-

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nice one Sayra. Me think most Kenyans are DISHONEST farters. Just think of mums and dads doing it mbele ya watu and SHAMELESSLY blaming the kid around (no dogs/pets here).

    ReplyDelete
  3. People, please-the truth is that in Kenya nobody farts-we are a special us Kenyans.just like all our parents were number one in class (so who was bottom?), walked great distances to get to their school(it took half the day but still did not miss the first lesson),and of course never made a mistake in their life until they had you

    ReplyDelete
  4. An absolutely hilarious article. I can see the book title now:

    "Bigger blowhole, more happiness: the science of using your farts to blow greater joy and peace of mind into your life" by Beans You Fart

    Ha ha. Thanks for that

    ReplyDelete
  5. Kibaki is a silent farter, his silent fart has cost us so much

    ReplyDelete

Any posts breaking the house rules of COMMON DECENCY will be promptly deleted, i.e. NO TRIBALISTIC, racist, sexist, homophobic, sexually explicit, abusive, swearing, DIVERSIONS, impersonation and spam AMONG OTHERS. No exceptions WHATSOEVER.