Emmy Kosgei about to marry an old man

Latest Update: Wedding takes place as Bride arrives in chopper

The big news on the web is the upcoming wedding of well-loved local gospel song bird Emmy Kosgei to a Nigerian pastor at least 22 years older than her. Emmy is 33 and her husband to be, Apostle Madubuko is 55. Just the kind of stuff to get the gossip mills working at full stretch.

So what else is new? After all young girls have been getting married to old men since the beginning of time. Usually the reason is financial. And yet in Emily's case she is hardly starving and has in fact made herself a tidy fortune from her talented vocals. Not to mention the fact that she counts as her close friends some very powerful and wealthy individuals in these shores, whose idea of pocket money is a couple of million shillings for shopping in London or Hong Kong. So it cannot possibly be about money.

And so is it love? True love?

Admittedly the idea of true love and finding soul mates is pretty trendy in these shores just now. Thanks in no small measure to the large volume of Mexican and Philippino soaps that have invaded the region and are turning the hearts and minds of many Kenyan women to start believing and hoping in something that is said to happen only to a handful of people in many lifetimes.

Believe it or not there are many reasons for a young girl to fall in love with a much older man which I will delve into in a minute. But let's start with what Emmy must prepare herself for if she goes ahead with this proposed union.

The first problem she will have already encountered (highlighted rather brutally by the hate messages and crude comments flying around in twitter over her planned wedding). And that is (simply put) "what will people say?" 

Whom you decide to marry is your own personal choice and must be so because you and only you will face the consequences and live with them for a very long time to come. And yet the truth of the matter is that most of us get married ONLY to people whom our family and friends will approve. Few have the courage to tell those around them to go to hell. And the strange thing is that those around us always seem to know more about our intimate relationships than we do ourselves. They KNOW it is not true love and they also KNOW it cannot be sex (what can that old man do, surely?).

Incidentally unknown to many, sex is a weapon (if I can call it that for want of a better word) that older men have frequently used to win the hearts of much younger lasses. Experience helps older men get pretty good at the art of really pleasing a woman in this department. In Emmy's case that cannot be because Christian marriages do not work quite like that. Sex happens only when everything is legal and finalized.

The other weapon is humour. Yep, you can actually get a girl to easily laugh her way into love or more likely serious infatuation.

But we are supposed to be talking about problems here and one of the other major ones younger women face with older men is children. An older man may not be as keen as you are on having children. And even if they are, the idea of being kept awake the whole night by a howling and shrieking bundle of joy could create serious cracks in a new marriage.

Still as a happily married lady friend has just emphasized to me, older men bring true happiness in a marriage and the kind of attention somebody your own age would never come close to giving you.

At the end of the day these matters are very personal and every woman has a right to seek happiness where she thinks she can find it; **ck what other people want to think.



See latest Chris Kumekucha political post; 

Will Isaac Ruto be roasted with the meat at Naivasha?

Will Isaac Ruto be roasted with the nyama choma in Naivasha today?

 

Excerpts from the latest Raw notes...

As you read this the top decision-making organ (The National Executive Council) of the United Republican Party (URP) is in session at a retreat in Naivasha. Officially the agenda is strengthening the institutional capacity of the party. The truth is that they are meeting to deal with the "Isaac Ruto problem" once and for all.

It is no accident that Isaac met with the President's political advisor, Joshua Kuttuny ahead of this meeting. What Kuttuny told Isaac is still a mystery but what is clear is that whatever it was it shook up poor Isaac quite a bit. By the time I sat down to write this Isaac had also not yet been sighted at the Naivasha retreat although insiders still insisted that he was expected.

Also interesting about this Naivasha meeting is the fact that it is not the party chairman Francis Ole Kaparo who will chair the NEC meeting but the Deputy President William Ruto himself who was expected to fly in from Mombasa where he has been with the president scoring massive points at the Coast dishing out 60,000 title deeds.

My information is that water tight resolutions will be set to deal with any would-be lone rangers within the party who may want to have a different position from that of the party on any issue now or in the future. And even if Isaac Ruto were to turn up you can be sure that he will not be holding his hat in his hand and looking repentant over the grief he has caused Bwana Kubwa DP William Ruto and the larger JUBILEE family which URP belongs to. And that is what is so exciting about what is going on in Naivasha and the possible drama that could ensue. But still whatever drama Kenyans are treated to will have zero impact where it really matters. I will tell you why in a minute.

These kinds of meetings are not for delivering directives but for discussion and brain storming to solve problems. The relaxed ambiance is supposed to help participants remain level headed and sober and thus much more likely to find some middle ground somewhere. Only that there is no middle ground in this referendum issue. Isaac has always said that he wants the allocations to counties to be legalized and is not interested even in 90% allocation if it is not written down in the laws because it can always be taken away later by somebody on a whim. Makes plenty of sense. Now the JUBILEE position is that this will be done in due course in parliament and there is no need for a referendum.

But what has irked William Ruto and others in JUBILEE is that Isaac's position is way too similar to that of CORD and everybody knows that the only reason CORD are so concerned about taking the country into a referendum is to fight the JUBILEE government.

History as they say always repeats itself and if my dad was alive he would almost certainly be talking about a similar happening in the run up to independence in the late 50s and early 60s when Jaramogo Oginga Odinga already well beaten and outsmarted by Tom Mboya suddenly woke up one morning and said that Kenyans were NOT interested in independence unless and until Jomo Kenyatta was released. Many asked; Jomo who?? An old blurbing compromising man who had been jailed on trumped charges and mostly forgotten was the stature of Jomo at the time. But sly Odinga senior knew that with Jomo on the scene, there was no way Mboya's largely Kikuyu political base would overlook their own for Mboya when it came to electing Kenya's first Prime Minister. That political strategy worked like a charm and changed the destiny of Kenya.

In much the same way.....(read the rest in my latest raw notes published a few minutes ago)

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Has the referendum push been dealt a death blow?

Other News: Kenyan on student Visa shot dead in Dallas

Is the referendum campaign dead in the water now?

This is the question on the mind of most political analysts.

The ruthless neutralization of the main face of the push for the referendum one Isaac Ruto has left many dumbfounded. Read this earlier Kumekucha article on how it was done.

Not that Deputy President William Ruto did not warn Jubilee renegades several times that they would face dire consequences should they fail to disassociate themselves from the push for a referendum spearheaded by the opposition. Now he has made good his promise, or so it appears. And anybody feeling the pain now was warned.

Still, it  is not in Isaac Ruto's character to remain cowed. Anybody who has closely followed his politics for any length of time will tell you that. And so whatever it is that they have used to silence him, you can be sure he will find a way to hit back which will muddy the waters even more. The two Rutos (Isaac and William) have faced off many times before and the truth is that Isaac has come out as the more persuasive and convincing debator in this referendum issue that has so dominated our news in recent days, even putting more pressing and urgent matters like insecurity in the back burner.

As we continue to carefully analyze developments on this issue over the next few days, there is plenty of truisms we must appreciate. 

CORD will NOT quit.

The people of Kenya will NOT quit in asking for more money to go to the counties.

The JUBILEE government will not lie down and watch money (replace that word with "power" where this issue of funds is concerned) being snatched from them and taken to the grassroots.

But surely something will have to give at the end of the day... will it not??

Spare a thought for poor Uhuru

Guest post
 
It’s a tough job and someone has to do it!!
 
The mood was glum, the tension palpable. Those present at this meeting were trying their best to be upbeat but failing miserably none the less. We were here to make some tough decisions, elephantine in nature you might say, the kind of decisions that whatever the outcome it was going to backlash on us. The phase ‘damned if you do, damned if you don’t’ took on a whole new meaning because, I was not at the periphery looking in, but right in the middle of the damn situation and I was damned if I did and damned if I didn’t.
 
The usual agenda items were dispensed with in a routine manner, the usual exuberance and jocular manner replaced by a tense and somber mood obvious to all. Eyes were mostly cast down and not making eye contact with each other. The business of the day dispensed with, one of our own was politely asked to leave the meeting as whatever needed to be discussed touched on them personally and under corporate governance rules any interested party on whom a matter touched upon needed to absent themselves, either physical exclusion or by not participating in the deliberations.  Should the rest of us also have been asked to leave the meeting room, weren’t we after all interested parties in any case?
 
This was it, the diplomacy of previous weeks, the efforts to resolve the impasse, the misinformation and twisting of facts in the media that had preceded this meeting was now behind us, water under the bridge, we had arrived at a point of no return. It was crunch time and hard decisions needed to be made and the consequences of such decisions were weighty and rested on our shoulders. The buck literally stopped with us!
 
Were we really ready? Were we ready to plunge into this pool of unchartered waters, not sure what the currents of these turbulent waters and fate held in store for us? Were we ready to make a weighty decision on one of our own and others caught up in the aftermath? Uncertainty was writ large on the faces of several as the Chairman outlined the issues that had brought us there and what our role was going to be at the end of the day, a matter that had to be concluded one way or another however long we took.
 
The questions and comments began, hesitant at first but slowly taking on the desired momentum. A probing question here, a clarification there, a rehash of the documents of the company to see that all loopholes had been sealed and that we had done everything by the book, a query as to whether the recommending committee had been properly constituted. Was their recommendation unanimous? This was now getting serious and it appeared clear that this was but a tactic to draw out the decision making process as long as possible  because clearly no one was looking forward to moving to the next step!!
 
Were there any exit clauses? Did we have any options other than making the hard decisions? Could we postpone this for some time in the future, sleep over it perhaps? But no, this thing needed to be concluded and it needed to be finalized immediately because too much was at stake.........................!
 
The above is a personal narrative meant to show the depth of helplessness that confronts someone when a weighty decision has to be made. If this is what being a president means then the presidency is not something I can wish on even my worst enemy because day in day out it is a never ending rollercoaster of a ride. Just as you think you have stabilized the ship another rogue waves comes along and threatens to sink your vessel once again. Just as you think all the ducks are in a row, some other issue comes along and pushes them out of kilter. But this is the world of leadership, of decision making where hard decisions have to be made despite opposition to whatever decision you may make.
 
At the pinnacle of leadership in any organisation, in any country, in any situation the buck screeches to a halt in front of you and not in a methodical, slow tap on the brakes kind of way but in a bone jarring stand on the brakes kind of way!  It is an emergency however you look at it and some people could lose their livelihoods, others their sanity and still others their dignity whichever decision is taken. You are damned if you do and damned if you don’t. It does not matter, how methodically you study the situation and look at it from all angles, at the end of the day the decision has to be made.
 
That is why, I think it is quite naïve and disingenuous that the majority of Kenyans see that the recently elected government of the day is not doing enough, and has been unable to meet its pledges and has been bedeviled with challenges ever since the president and his deputy were sworn in. This is the honeymoon period when all the sweet nothings mentioned as you wooed  the voters come back to haunt you because the structures are not in place, your detractors want to ensure that you do not succeed and as the structures of government are changing to the county system confusion and disorder rule the day.
 
So I posit that it is necessary to give our leaders sometime and cut them some slack so that they organise their business and get to understand the structures that oil the mechanisms that make things happen. This business of leadership is not easy and takes lots of commitment, spirit and guts and someone has to do it!

Read other great posts from our guest writers' blog

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Isaac Ruto suddenly changes his mind about the referendum. Very fishy indeed!!

Isaac Ruto (pictured) has in recent weeks scored enormous points right across the political divide nationally for his stance on devolution. His very vocal and articulate push for a referendum to increase budget allocations from the national treasury to county governments has rapidly gained enormous support right down to the grassroots. Isaac has had no qualms contradicting William Ruto in public meetings and receiving a louder and bigger applause every time.

Although JUBILEE insiders have been quick to brand him a CORD mole, the most beautiful thing about Isaac's spirited pro-devolution campaign was that it was effectively removing ugly tribal politics from this debate.

Now two days ago the fiery Bomet governor emerged from a meeting with a man voters firmly rejected in the last elections Joshua Kuttuny (pictured above), with a sudden change of heart. Ruto has now abandoned his call for a referendum and is ready to talk to the JUBILEE high command about other ways of increasing the said allocations, something he has been swearing NEVER to do.

Just to jog your memory, Kuttuny (35) is the clownish immediate former MP for Cherengani whose political speeches have always been pure comedy with little substance, better suited for the popular Churchill comedy show. Apparently his constituents just laughed with him and at him and chose a rookie independent candidate Wesley Korir instead. Kuttuny (who has never held any other job in his life other than that of being a clownish Mpig) was recently resurrected from joblessness oblivion and brokenness when he was gifted a plum job as President Uhuru Kenyatta's political advisor (the grand title for that is Director of Political Affairs in the Office of The President). It is in that new capacity that he met with Isaac Ruto. Fascinatingly Kuttuny has a big problem expressing himself in any other language other than deep sheng. In the clip I have linked to later in this article he struggles with the English language. So much so that one wonders how such a man could ever have been trusted by anybody to represent a constituency in the august house where the main business is debate.

But what exactly went down during the closed-door meeting with Kuttuny? What made the Bomet governor so quickly agree to do something he has always sworn he would never do?

That was one meeting shrouded in mystery which is solved in my very latest raw notes. But incase you are not a subscriber this Youtube video clip provides an important clue to help you figure it out for yourself.

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Is it cool for a public servant to be so arrogant and abusive?

His first car was a Suzuki Vitara, which he bought two years after he started his law firm straight from college with a mere Kshs 7000. He then bought a brand new BMW and currently he drives a Porshe Cayenne, Toyota Land Cruiser and Land Rover Discovery. The arrogant man swears that he will never drive a Mercedes Benz or Range rover. "I'm never into what other people like." 

That information about Ahmednasir Abdullahi is in the public domain. But there is so much more that most Kenyans do not know. Why for instance is he so feared by colleagues? What is the real reason for his sheer arrogance and abusive nature? Why will he forever regret having underestimated Gladys Shollei and treating her like trash without due process? Was Shollei guilty? What exactly did she do that triggered the vicious witch-hunt against her? 

Interestingly in the recent unfolding Gladys Shollei saga the name that has taken centre stage is that of this man rather than the accussed. Especially his sheer arrogance and abusive nature which have opened the eyes of many Kenyans to exactly what this man is all about. 

Colleagues who should know like to call him the most over-rated lawyer in these shores. Those who have encountered him in business circles call him a reckless but shrewd risk-taker. 

An arrogant man is an easy foe to deal with because for starters they will always tend to underestimate you. A quick perusal of the files at JSC should have reminded Bwana Abdullahi that Shollei had the unprecedented distinction of being short-listed for two major jobs at the same time. That of deputy chief justice and chief registrar before she ended up with the latter post. That is NOT the kind of person you just walk all over just like that, even if they happen to be a woman. 

There is no doubt that Ahmednasir Abdullahi will live to regret his brush with Shollei. Already the public spotlight is squarely on him and a number of journalists are digging around into some of his recent questionable real estate deals. Sooner or later you can be sure that some dirt will come out. More revelations in my latest Kumekucha's raw notes. 

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Was JKIA being run like a village stall? The shocking truth

Job/income opportunity: From zero to 5k a week.
================================
By guest writer who knows
A village stall it - JKIA - is and it has been managed like one for a very long time. And that is the truth.

The CCTV system at JKIA does not have an alternative location or secondary viewing capacity, and that is why the system was rendered useless or inoperable the moment the terminal was engulfed in massive flames.

The CCTV footage from a forty-eight hour cycle leading to the time when fire broke out, was damaged and there is very little for investigators to go by in terms of visuals forensics.

Furthermore, there is no use at all of having fake smoke detectors in very limited locations within the terminals at JKIA, at time when malfunctioning sprinklers are the order of the day.

There has always been zero routine checkup or maintenance of the fake - very poor quality - smoke detectors and sprinklers at JKIA and other major government facilities around the city.

Kenyans should not be surprised at all that the recently refurbished parliament at a cost of over several billion shillings is still very vulnerable to fire related disasters due to inadequate fire prevention measures within the buildings.

We, as nation, had it coming and it was about time to have a wake-up call of such magnitude because we seem to have already forgotten all about the embassy bombing and its aftermath more than a decade ago.

Complacency is our collective second nature as well as our Achilles heel. Very little outcome should be expected from the enquiry about the mess JKIA has become in terms of security and overall management the entire facility. 

Job/income opportunity: From zero to 5k a week.

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Bizarre facts about JKIA fire

It is easy to imagine what is happening in some western capital as airline executives discuss yesterday's inferno at the JKIA. "Where did it happen?" "Africa?" "Well that is expected isn't it? "Natives running an airport like some stall in some village market in the bush."

You can be pretty sure that such discussions are taking place even as you read this. But you and I are more informed on what is to be expected in the particular part of Africa where an international airport burnt down in the early hours of yesterday.

For starters fire in an airport that was not caused by a crash landing aircraft is almost unheard of (even in Africa). Process that for a minute. Secondly JKIA is a high security zone and is monitored by CCTV almost everywhere. That security has been heightened considerably in recent years with the emerging terror threat from the likes of Al Shabab. I have also confirmed that the place is literally crawling with smoke detectors. Then add to all that the fact that top security and intelligence officers are based at the top of the international arrivals unit.

How then does a fire start in a fortress and spread gradually without anybody paying any attention to it?
(read the rest of this article in my latest raw notes).

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This is Uhuru's future from a man who has NEVER gotten it wrong (2013 prediction)

In the run up to the 2002 general elections there was great fear in the country and many rich folks left Kenya for the duration of those memorable elections. The excuse many gave was that they were taking a holiday. But the massive transfer of funds out of the country spoke a different story.

The fear was justified because credible reports that even I received indicated that there was a lot of pressure on then then President Daniel Moi to find a way to hang onto power. Kenya also had no history of a peaceful handover of power from a living president.

Then in the midst of all these uncertainties an arrogant Briton came into the country for prayers and started making predictions and prophecies on the country's political future. Few Kenyans had ever heard of the London based preacher. But he spoke with such authority that some Kenyans even got annoyed.

He predicted that there would be a peaceful change of guard. Mwai Kibaki was going to be the new president and he would usher in a new era in the country. His role was to prepare the country for take off, putting all the structures in place and in readiness for Kenya to prosper so much so that many will jealously ask; "why Kenya?" I drunk in all his prophecies and implemented the only known test for prophets, to wait and see if what he had said would come to pass. You know what happened next.

Then in 2007 the man was back again. This time I was really shocked. He predicted that Mwai Kibaki would be back in office. he was going to finish his work of preparation. This contradicted all the information I had on the ground which clearly showed that Raila Odinga was headed for a landslide victory in those presidential elections. The prophet had to be wrong this time round, I was sure.

That election resulted in post election violence and weeks of uncertainty over what was going to happen next. But the truth is that the man was right once again.

In the run up to the just concluded 2013 general elections I deliberately chose to not read his prophecies because I was sure they would influence my analysis and writing. And so immediately after the elections, I rushed to his website and read what he had been saying.

He predicted that Uhuru would be an important President in ushering the future divine calling of the nation called Kenya. Will this come to pass? Only time will tell.

Why even Nelson Mandela would not have won Makueni seat

By M-pesa
The good people of Makueni voted for Wiper, not Mutula Jnr. 

They would have voted for a monkey in a suit, as long as it was standing on Wiper ticket- so as to "punish" Jubilee. Mutula Jnr only campaigned for just a few "seconds" very late before the ballot was cast. He did not even venture 30% of the vast Makueni. He does not have any "development record" to speak of and most people of Makueni just saw him on TV and know he's the son of the real thing. 

On the other hand, just imagine all the goodies someone like Mwau would have brought to the people of Makueni, implicating the wonderful job he did in Kilome as an MP! I know the role of a Senator is not to unleash the goodies, but hey the people there are starving, some even feed on rats, truth be told. Water is like gold in those parts. 

What impact will the people of Makueni see in 5 short years brought about by Jnr? What has Kalonzo done in Ukambani for the last 30+ years? 

Ngilu was accused of heavily favoring Ukambani when she was water minister but she got "punished" by the Wiper wave. Is there something odd/wrong/funny with our politics? I doubt even someone like Mandela would have made it unless he was in the "right" party. Honestly..... 

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Makueni voter speaks out

38 year old senator-elect for Makueni Mutula Kilonzo Junior
 
Here is a conversation I had with a voter on the ground on Thursday (the day before the polls and I hereby reproduce it verbatim.)

Kumekucha: Why do you people in Makueni hate the government so much?

Makueni Voter: You must live outside the country. Times are hard in Kenya and it is all the JUBILEE government's fault.

Kumekucha: But you know this government has been there for a very short time and inherited many problems, how can you blame them?

Makueni Voter: I am not highly educated and so I know nothing about financing and the economy but let me give you examples of what I am trying to say. Kibaki was not as good as Moi but at least he allowed us to work and make a living. This government seems to be very hungry for money, I do not know if donors have stopped sending them money. They are determined to tax unga and other essentials. I do a boda boda business in Nairobi during the day and at my home area at night. During the day city council askaris are harassing the whole day asking for bribes. Then at night the police take over. Since the road block near where I live has now been removed and the cops no longer make money from that, they come to collect our earnings for the day. Life is unbearable. How do you expect me to to like the government.

Kumekucha: The examples you have given are about corrupt individuals taking your money, surely that is not the government.
Makueni Voter: But it is the government causing it. They have refused to release money and meanwhile every day they come up with new laws and new ways to take away the little money we have earned through new taxes and rules and regulations that either require us to pay more money or hinder what we are doing to make money. Kenyans are very hard working people and all we need is to be left alone to hassle and make our money. This JUBILEE government is just bringing about suffering. I fear that very soon we will see what is happening in Egypt happening here because the small man has had enough.

Kumekucha: That cannot be true. Kenyans are very peaceful and some people say they are cowards.

Makueni Voter:  I am now sure you do not live in Kenya. There is something called the stomach. When somebody is hungry and he has never stolen in his life, will he not steal to eat? Moi was a hero because he not only always gave us relief food here in Ukambani but he understood the common man and always made sure that we had a way of surviving. With all the hunger and frustration I am seeing you will soon see Kenyans on the streets causing chaos. Our lives are already chaotic.

Kumekucha: There are rumours that somebody is going to try and rig the by-elections. What is your comment?
Makueni Voter: Let them try and they will see what will happen. They will be shocked. We have had enough. I can tell you that some people have been busy giving out money. I was even offered Kshs 5,000 to give out my ID for "safekeeping" until after the election. That is a lot of money but I said NO. The problem is that these people think that people who are hungry and are poor do not have brains that are working. We Makueni people know what they want to do but we will vote and wait to see. Let them even try to delay the results so that they can change things and you will see what will happen.

Kumekucha: In your view what should the government do to improve the lives of Kenyans?
Makueni Voter: They should just leave us alone and release money. We do not need handouts or laptops. We just want to be left alone to survive.

Ignorant as most of the views of this voter were, they sent a chill up my spine. Make your own judgement on the situation in the country today and what is likely to happen if the current government does not start paying attention to the common man wherever he can be found in our republic and whatever party affiliation they may have.


(article courtesy of Kumekucha's Raw notes with sensitive parts edited out).

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Mutula Kilonzo Junior Wins Makeuni by A Huge Landslide

Although the official results for the Makueni senatorial seat by-elections are yet to be announced, latest reports show that Mutula Kilonzo Junior is leading with over 100,000 votes with his closest challenger Prof P. Kaloki with less than 3,000 votes. Anybody catching up with him is therefore now out of question. The people of Makueni have spoken emphatically and despite numerous obstacles the opposition CORD coalition has retained the seat which fell vacant after the death of Senator Mutula Kilonzo father to Mutula Kilonzo Junior. More details to follow after the results are announced officially.

On The Persistent Equity Bank Rumours

Ask Nairobians, they know everything and are experts in every field under the sun, no matter how technical.

Recently when Equity Bank customers were having problems drawing funds from the bank the "clever" Nairobians were at it on social media and everywhere. The rumours still persist. Where are they coming from and what would be the motive? Or are they actually true?;

"I told you guys not to put your money in Equity, now the bank is collapsing with your money. You haven't heard? Equity is in trouble, just as I predicted ages ago."


The truth is that they are mostly hilarious stuff when you consider the cold facts. Today Equity is the largest bank in East and Central Africa and beyond in terms of account holders. Out of every 5 accounts held in a bank in Kenya, a staggering 4 are with Equity. What are the implications of this in simple language? Let me give you a simple example easily understandable even if you are not a Finance and banking person. Any time the over 3.6 million account holders make a withdrawal the bank makes money. Try and multiply 3.6 million by a mere Kshs 20!! And these days the vast majority of the "tellers" are not costly unionized humans but machines (ATMS) that work 24/7 and 365 days a year without pay.

The other big secret behind the Equity cash machine is the fact that their loan portfolio is mostly small amounts of cash loaned to low income earners who pay back within 3 months or so. For those who do not have a head for figures what that means is that when the other big banks loan out Kshs 1 million to be repaid over 5 years, Equity loans the same amount and it is repaid in 3 months. meaning that the 1 million will go out 20 times at Equity when it goes out only once at Barclays. And by the way low income earners are more faithful in paying back loans than seasoned rich people some of whom will consult their lawyer for technicalities to help them keep the money for as long as possible.

Any bank can collapse but the truth is that your money today in Kenya will be safest with Equity Bank.

The recent troubles at Equity Bank understandably caused a run on the bank. Now a bank ONLY survives on the confidence of its' customers and there is no bank that will not suffer serious cash flow problems and probably even collapse if a huge chunk of their customers wake up one morning and all decide to withdraw all their funds. But Equity has survived many runs in their earlier leaner years courtesy of rumours from jealous managers at big banks like (edited out) who have done their best to regularly spread rumours that the bank is NOT stable and can go under at any time. In one particular memorable case one of the big banks mentioned "paid" a popular gutter press publication to carry a screaming headline that the bank was going under. Equity did the only thing a bank can do in such a situation found the cash to pay those who wished to close their accounts in a hurry. They did this so well that the public realized that there was nothing to the rumours and many promptly returned their money to the same bank.

There are some folks who just hate Equity Bank for tribal reasons. They say that it is owned by Kikuyus. Personally I admire innovation no matter what tribe is responsible for it.

Sadly Kenyans have a very short memory. Let me tell you a short story to jog your memory.

Once upon a time banks in Kenya were rich and fat and sitting on their butts asleep most of the time. Customers were treated like trash and a nuisance to the bank. It was like the banks were doing people a favour accepting their deposits. Then the Kenyan government got broke because donor funding dried up in protest of human rights violations and the then dictatorial one party system. The Moi government decided to borrow huge amounts of money from the public by setting up Treasury Bills with crazy interests rates. Now the banks found a new source of super profits. Buy treasury bills and go on holiday. Come back and claim the 80 % interest, buy more treasury bills and go back to the beach. They were sure that the honeymoon would last forever and so they started closing accounts. They asked all customers who had less than Kshs 20,000 in their accounts (their biggest headache) to come and collect it and put it under the mattress if they so wished. Those who delayed arrived to find their accounts already closed and had to run around in circles to get the paltry cash remaining after the bank had imposed heavy penalties.

Equity was a small struggling building society then. It invited these customers to open accounts and made the whole process so easy. From the rude treatment in the big banks the friendly understanding atmosphere at Equity attracted many customers. Then the bank got really innovative, it went down to the grassroots to look for opportunities to lend cash on short term basis to ordinary low income Kenyans. This was the niche which all the banks were sure was NOT feasible and would easily cause a bank to shut down, or so they thought. Indeed they laughed when they heard what Equity was doing. "kiosk" bank, they dubbed them. But the innovative small bank soldiered on making a killing from lending small amounts to desperate Kenyans looking to buy tiny plots of land from land-buying companies that had sub-divided them into tiny plots barely large enough to stand on.

The rest as they say is story. Today a significant ownership of the bank is held by foreign investors with deep pockets but the bank continues to do what it does best serving the small man. Hilariously one of the big banks tried to copy the Equity model of lending money with minimal security to office workers in Nairobi and lost such a huge sum of cash that that particular mess will never be sorted out and has been written off in the books.

Oh and about kiosk banking, today all the banks are on the streets with tents (another Equity innovation) and moving door to door luring people to open accounts with them. For those who lived when banks were arrogant this is still an unbelievable sight to behold.

Now about the recent problems with withdrawals at the bank my impeccable sources tell me it was incompetence on the part of a worker in the IT department who missed a critical step in updating the system and what followed was a chain of events that led to the crisis. Sadly that single man has so dented the reputation of the bank and caused its' many enemies to have a field day with their propaganda.

The Equity story always fills me with plenty of pride. Give me such homegrown innovation any day... I don't really give a damn whether it is by a Kikuyu, Luo, Turkana or whatever.

P.S. Actually Equity is no longer the largest bank in terms of account holders. I am reliably informed that it has been overtaken by CBA (Commercial bank of Africa). Yep that outfit owned by (edited out). That is when you take into account M-Shwari accounts which are held in partnership with Safaricom's Mpesa. But that is a story for another day.

(article courtesy of Kumekucha's Raw notes with sensitive parts edited out).

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This is the next senator of Makueni... uta-do?

I received some very angry emails from some of you when I predicted the outcome of the high court case on Kethi Kilonzo's eligibility to run in Makueni in my Kumekucha's raw notes. That prediction like many I make here was NOT guesswork but was based on privileged info and some very expert legal opinion on the evidence before the court.

Now more people are going to be pretty angry with this post that predicts the outcome of that by-election, which will happen barely a week from today.

The move to fish out Mutula Jnr from their magic hat was an excellent "trick" by CORD "magicians" and the first time that the coalition has taken JUBILEE by complete surprise. Still it may NOT be enough based on the information that I have this morning.

For starters the threat to contest Mutula Jnr's eligibility to run by appealing the high court decision is just a side show designed to keep CORD under pressure and if possible to divide their attention as the real work goes on behind the scenes in Makueni.  As is the attack on Kalonzo Musyoka by the JUBILEE candidate Prof Philip Kaloki in a press conference yesterday. The JUBILEE campaign has been very carefully crafted not to attack Mutula Jnr directly but to instead focus on the CORD high command. Hopefully this will shift voter attention away from sympathy votes in favour of the late Mutula's son. 

Most people do not understand the role of a spoiler in an election. Others do not believe that such careful arithmetic is possible in something that is as unpredictable as elections usually are. But the truth is that it works and the tactic has been used effectively all over the world including in the US presidential elections. Indeed it works even better in Kenyan by-elections which usually have very low voter turnouts. Then you have to take into consideration the fact that Uhuruto are pretty smart and CORD at the moment is just playing catch up and are sadly not catching up fast enough. No true patriot will pop the champagne at this news because a strong, alert, opposition is critical to a vibrant democracy. More so to the sometimes dangerous JUBILEE government.

All indications are that John Harun Mwau is going to play the role of spoiler in the Makueni by-election. His main role is to reduce the number of votes that would otherwise have gone to the young Mutula. This will be done using cash. If you can't buy a voter to vote for you the next thing is to make sure they DON'T vote. You just buy their national ID card for the duration of the election and they can get it back after it's all over. One thousand bob is a lot of cash in Makueni county. It can buy food for hungry children for days on end. Two thousand bob is better and five thousand an absolute fortune.

And because Mwau and Kaloki are a team, all the latter has to do is ensure massive turnout from his strongholds and he will win the seat.

Sometimes a spoiler plays their cards so well that they end up winning, which will still be okay for JUBILEE (read my raw notes to discover why losing his seat to CORD is NOT an option for JUBILEE).

Plan B is that if the numbers still don't add up, a little adjustment (like the one done in the March 4th presidential elections) will be executed. A handful of "added" votes in each polling station so small in number (but they quickly add up to a significant figure) that nobody will notice, should do it.

The bottom line is that the next senator of Makueni will NOT be from CORD.

Disbanding the IEBC will NOT solve the problem of "fiddled" elections
Some Kenyans were sure that with the disbanding of the ECK and sending it's chair Samuel Kivuiti home would solve the problem of fiddled elections in Kenya. It did NOT. Now the same people think that disbanding the IEBC will work. Why would anybody want to do the same thing again and expect different results this time?

Avid readers of my raw notes will know that there is another government body that needs to be looked at and legislation passed to block that organization from coming anywhere near a general election. That is the solution to this problem. And if that agency is just too powerful then we need to pass legislation to get foreigners to run our elections. Which body is this? Well that info is rather sensitive and is in my raw notes. Sorry. But the good news is that it is fairly easy to get my raw notes.

Is Kethi About To Be Arrested?

Plus chaos escalating in Kenya

It is now going to 5 months since the last rather strange general elections and political temperatures in the country have risen to dangerous levels. As you read this Kenya is on the brink of total chaos and all fingers must point to our unique brand of destructive politics.

To make matters worse most Kenyans don't even realize what is going on. Thanks to the tons of information (noise) flying at us from all directions which has made most totally immune to alarming headlines and trends.

The long and short of it is that the bitter political struggle between CORD and JUBILEE that was clearly evident in the vulgar and abusive commentaries seen in social media shortly after those elections is now about to pour into the streets.

Let me tell you a true and typical story to illustrate what is about to happen.

Imagine for a moment a couple who are used to noise in the neighborhood every day. Kids coming home drunk. Others playing soccer on the pavement and loud reggae music accompanied by the pungent aroma of weed (bhang) being smoked somewhere outside. After months of this kind of racket and chaos the couple get so used to it that they have no problem falling asleep. But one night amid all the usual noise there is a new kind of "noise". Armed thugs have invaded the place and are going house to house robbing people. The wife thinks that she has heard a gun shot but her husband assures her that the kind of loud music usually played sometimes has gun-shot like noises. And so they go back to sleep. Both their cell phones start vibrating at the same time. "Who is this calling us at night?" the husband asks promptly disconnecting his phone and then switching it off without even looking at the caller ID. The wife senses that something is amiss but is more frightened of upsetting her husband, especially if she ends up being wrong. And so she also switches off her phone but not before checking the called ID and realizing that it is a neighbour who frequently borrows money from them trying to call.

And so the couple go back to sleep. A few minutes later there is a huge bang as their front door gives way to a huge stone and 20 thugs armed to the teeth rush into their house. By the time they try to get out of bed powerful beams of light are directed to their faces. The thugs proceed to gang rape the wife in full view of her husband and the children even as they gather all the valuables they can find in the house. That family like others in the neighborhood are left traumatized for life.

That is the situation we are now facing and most of us will wake up when the thugs are already in the house doing their thing.

CORD were outsmarted in the last general elections and at every turn since the hotly contested presidential elections. There is no doubt now that the coalition is the weakest opposition the country has ever had since we returned to multi-party politics with its' main leaders out of the national assembly and at least one prominent member of the top leadership desperately struggling to remain politically relevant. What would you do? The answer is simple. You would resort to what every cornered dog does. You turn in blind rage and become extremely dangerous.

With no adequate numbers in either the senate or house of representatives to get anything done and with a judiciary that they mistrust CORD is now preparing for a major offensive on the streets. The idea is to turn Kenya into another Egypt and trigger a people's coup so to speak (see details in yesterday's raw notes ).

And it was all triggered in Makueni county. All evidence so far points to the fact that Kethi Kilonzo's voter registration documents are not valid and must have therefore been forged. That's pretty serious but there is an even more serious concern that legal experts including presidential candidate Martha Karua are now raising. How did some junior TNA officials get full access to the IEBC voter register with their numerous different rolls so early in the game to be able to ascertain that Kethi's name was NOT there? Who is the custodian of the IEBC voter register? Based on these concerns, CORD has bluntly proclaimed that TNA and the IEBC are one and the same merged organization.

Naturally TNA have angrily denied this and are accusing CORD of conveniently shifting attention from the real issue in the recent Makueni senatorial elections nominations. According to them the issue is missing voter registration material from the IEBC that is suspected to have been used to forge Kethi Kilonzo's voter registration card. Indeed as you read this police are out investigating the matter with clear instructions to press charges as soon as possible. Lawyers associated to the party are even saying that they can already charge Kethi with "handling stolen property."

Kalonzo Musyoka in a recent press conference proclaimed that it was war and added that his coalition does not have a plan B because they are confident they will succeed. He added that CORD had launched a bid to have the IEBC disbanded.

War is the keyword here and when two elephants fight the grass suffers most.

Clearly emotions in the CORD camp have reached the level where reasoning takes a back seat. The coalition feels that the concluded election still shrouded in many question marks was stolen from them. Admittedly few people have an inkling of what really happened (those few include those who have read my unbiased eBook Mystery Monday: Unlocking the 2013 Kenyan Presidential Polls Secrets-see what those who have read it have to say  ). Salt is being rubbed into CORD wounds all the time as TNA arrogantly go about their business dismissing them as sour losers. Senator Beth Mugo even asked Mahackos senator Johnstone Muthama to shut up and wait for investigations into the late Mutula's death to be completed. That was after Muthama emotionally insisted that Mutula was murdered. The shocking bizarre truth can be found in Who murdered Mutula?   and in back issues of my raw notes. 
The President's Lovers is still available for a limited period

Can The High Court Save Kethi? What Legal Experts Say

Kethi sweating it out at the IEBC

Kethi Diana Kilonzo is in the news yet again but for the first time it is for all the wrong reasons.

The big discussion going in Kenya and beyond just now is if she lied about being registered voter and forged the documents that she presented to the IEBC. The electoral body thinks so and sadly there is plenty of evidence to support their stand.
In my Raw notes issue published even before the IEBC hearings commenced, I revealed to readers that according to two impeccable independent sources, Kethi did NOT actually register to vote in the just concluded general elections. That is the truth. And that disqualifies her to stand. We love her but rules are rules.

But why did Kethi, who is a lawyer risk everything to be on the ballot for the Makueni senatorial race to replace her late father? Who advised her and who assisted in the forgery? Clearly fingers have to point in the direction of the CORD high command which is filled with very experienced politicians. And so the next question is how could they make such a grave elementary mistake that has now snatched a seat that was already in the bag from their clutches? Why would they risk diminishing their numbers in the senate further? As much as JUBILEE supporters would like to dismiss it as mere carelessness the truth is that there is more to it.

Answers may NOT be easy to come by but increasingly it seems that the sudden and yet unresolved death of the late senator Mutula Kilonzo has a lot to do with the recklessness that CORD displayed in this issue. It seems that it was felt that the only way the issue of Mutula's mysterious death can firmly remain in the public eye and be followed up with is by Mutula's daughter Kethi sitting on her father's seat in the senate. Otherwise the death of the late senator would inevitably end up in the bulging file of unexplained deaths of politicians in this banana republic. No politician is as passionate about the Mutula issue as Machakos senator Johnstone Muthama who was one of the key figures within the Wiper party pushing for Kethi's candidature at all costs. Indeed Muthama is on record as declaring that there is no doubt on his mind that Mutula was murdered.
 
Johnstone Muthama

Interestingly it is widely believed by a vast majority of Kenyans that the late Makueni senator died from a Viagra overdose. Period. This is despite the symptoms leading to his death (widely published in the media) suggesting something to the contrary. To make matters even worse the sensational revelations of Mutula's womanizing ways that even proved that he actually had sex with a minor (a criminal offense) so angered many Kenyans that the vast majority have stopped caring about his death or how it may have happened.

Those who have read my revealing investigative book Why was Mutula murdered? are well aware of the circumstances surrounding his death and what the astonishing leaked autopsy results from the British pathologist have concluded (read what those who have read the book have to say about it ).

Indeed it was this information that finally convinced young Kethi to risk all and stand for the Makueni seat. Now legal experts are saying that it is highly unlikely that the High court will over-turn the IEBC verdict. You see courts work with solid evidence and NOT emotions. The truth is that Kethi is standing on very thin ice claiming that she registered as a voter. And that ice is already giving way.

Of course angry CORD supporters do not agree. Their argument, which cannot be used legally is that if so many unregistered voters were allowed to vote in the March 4th elections, why should Kethi be barred from contesting simply on suspicions that she is not a registered voter? Some CORD sympathizers have even been quick to point out that the discredited IEBC (in their eyes) has no business being judge and jury over its' own failings. CORD has always held the view that the just concluded general elections were rigged to favour JUBILEE and have claimed that their presidential candidate was denied as many as a million votes. incidentally in my unbiased book Mystery Monday: Unlocking the 2013 Kenyan Presidential Polls Secrets I reveal exactly what went wrong (see what those who have read the book had to say about it ). The truth is that the IEBC did not fail as massively as CORD would like Kenyans to believe, yet there is NO doubt that there were some subtle moves by other government arms that fiddled with those elections and ensured a round one win for Uhuru (clear motives revealed in the book). But you can tell that to the birds because CORD die-hards will never move from their position which is that the elections were stolen from them with massive vote stuffing.

But back to the Kethi issue, what next for the eloquent once promising lawyer?

Her rapidly rising legal career has now been destroyed and if the high court upholds the IEBC decision, the young lawyer who had displayed so much promise will be hang out to dry. To make matters worse this blogger has just been informed that there are some forces within JUBILEE who are determined to press criminal charges against Kethi related to the alleged forgery of her voter registration.

If it is possible to turn in one's grave then Mutula Kilonzo must be turning just now and it is in utter disgust at the mess. Incidentally this is just the kind of legal trouble that the late Mutula was an expert at sorting out and his style was always predictable but very effective. He would dig out legal technicalities in favour of his client and then work his powerful contacts like crazy. Indeed there are very few other lawyers (one of them being the legendary Byron Georgadis who rescued many from the jaws of the gallows at Kamiti)  who had a way of doing things in a similar way as Mutula. Kethi must be missing him in many ways just now.

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Breaking News: Kethi SHOCKER that will hit CORD Plus much more hot news

Kumekucha hot news round up

Kethi Kilonzo mind numbing shockBehind the scenes all is not well with Kenya's sweetheart candidate for the Makueni senatorial seat Kethi Diana Kilonzo. As you read this there is no doubt that the chair of the IEBC Isaak Hassan is sweating profusely. My latest raw notes tell you exactly why.

Uhuru in private
From deep in the corridors of power Kumekucha's informant paints a fascinating picture of Uhuru in power but under immense pressure. What is he like away from the media cameras and crowds? How does he take the pressures of the office? What does he talk about and what is his favourite drink? All these questions answered in an intimate study of Kenya's fourth president packed with information you will not get anywhere else. It's all in the Kumekucha raw notes.

July 5th Shocker That Changed Kenya Forever
In a few hours it will be July 5th. On this day 44 years ago 2 bullets rung out in quick expert succession. Seconds later, the short bald headed assassin escaped in a car. Those two bullets changed the course of Kenyan history. Lying in a pool of blood was one Thomas Joseph Odhiambo Mboya better known as Tom Mboya or TJ to his friends. Who was he? Why was his assassination so significant? Why were powerful people including his major political rival from his own community so determined to re-write the history of Kenya so much so that what our kids read in school today is close to pure fabrication of what really happened and this man's brilliant contribution to the fight for independence? Why are some of his killers still alive today in Kenya enjoying their retirement? Who are they? Chris Kumekucha has been investigating this cold case for 9 long years and has come up with some startling new highly sensitive revelations in his controversial raw notes.

Get all the details in a special book titled; Tom Mboya's killers identified. Order the book and receive a free 2 year subscription to the raw notes. Book costs only Kshs 495 or $4.5. Ordering details at the bottom of this email.

Also remember;The IEBC is yet to release the 2013 election results. Why? Why the delay and excuses? Is there something really fishy going on here or is it just incompetence. The answer is complex and shocking and you can read it all in my landmark book Mystery Monday: Unlocking the 2013 Kenyan presidential polls secrets are NOT in the dark. Indeed unfolding events have confirmed the contents of that revealing book 1000%. Let me give some very specific examples.

* Those who have read the book were not surprised when Raila complained that he was being trailed everywhere he went by the NSIS shortly after the Supreme court ruling that gave President Uhuru and JUBILEE victory.

* Neither are they surprised that the results have been delayed and that there seems to be a "mathematical" headache facing the IEBC.

* Even the current mounting political problems facing Deputy president William Ruto are linked to the chain of events that took place before and after that mystery Monday day when Kenyans voted in historical elections.
There is no need for you to remain in suspense wondering what would have happened. Today you can get virtually all your questions answered by getting hold of a copy of Mystery Monday: Unlocking the 2013 Kenyan presidential polls secrets and reading for yourself the juicy details surrounding the elections. JUBILEE supporters are especially encouraged to get the facts so that they have a viable answer to the claims that the vote difference is a whole one million votes. CORD diehards on the other hand will be better off knowing exactly what happened and why they were doomed for defeat as early as 2010 when the CORD alliance didn't even exist.

If you order this book today you will be entitled to ALSO get a FREE full 2 year subscription to KUMEKUCHA'S RAW NOTES which has explosive inside info on what is really going on behind the scenes in Kenyan politics.

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If you have already read the book on the elections you can choose any other book from Kumekucha at the same price and with the same offer. These books include my two latest hot sellers Why was Mutula Murdered? and What Jomo told Moi About Uhuru. Both are amazing reads that will give you unimaginable insights into Kenyan politics today.

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- Why was Mutula murdered? (Shocking. Explains exactly how it was done)
- Dark secrets of the Kenyan Presidency
- What Jomo told Moi About Uhuru
- Political Assassinations in Kenya
- Mystery Monday: Unlocking the 2013 Kenyan presidential polls secrets
- Scandals linked to 2013 Presidential candidates
- Tom Mboya's Killers Identified

For ordering details please click HERE