Zombies prepare to invade polling stations, but Dida has no zombie followers

Zombies in Kenya ready for the elections; Mohamed Dida refreshing non-zombie

What are zombies? According to Bwana Google it is; A soulless corpse said to be revived by witchcraft…

Well, Kenya is preparing for March 4th 2013 when millions of Zombies will invade polling stations to cast their votes. They will vote according to the chants you hear coming out of their smelly dead mouths.

Let me explain.

I have tried. I have really tried to have issue-based discussions with some of the most brilliant minds in Kenya on social media and even in social places all over the country. It has proved to be a futile mission. All I have met are Zombies programmed by either CORD or Jubilee. Their idea of a balanced debate on issues is a discussion that paints their candidate in good light and nothing else. Anything negative gets a predictable reaction from them. They huff and puff and start to get very annoyed and if you are not careful you will get a missile (like a bottle with the contents of EABL products still inside) hurled in your direction.

It seems that so many people have been bitten and turned into Zombies. I have met very few Peter Kenneth, Martha Karua or Mohamed Dida supporters but they have been joy to speak to. These folks you can have an intelligent discussion with. These people are non-tribal and love their country with a passion. I wish there was much more of them.

March 4th is going to be pretty predictable. CORD zombies in CORD zones and Jubilee zombies in Jubilee zones will troop obediently and in a trance to polling stations all over the country to vote for the side that bit them and turned them into Zombies.

Why waste time and money on presidential debates when Zombies cannot take in the contents of a debate? Why waste time releasing manifestos? Zombies don’t and can’t read, let alone comprehend and analyze the policies.

Why bother with opinion polls in a country of Zombies where all the people do is chant who they are supporting. Votes cast in stone that will not be changed by an earthquake.

That is why political rookie Mohamed Dida made such a huge impact on those of us who are still non-zombies. What impression do you expect a non-zombie to make amongst zombies? Right from the moment he first opened his mouth when he was presenting his papers to the IEBC the former Lenana school teacher has struck a chord in my heart. His speeches and remarks have inspired me as I am sure they have inspired so many Kenyans. Chances are that this is the man I will vote for on March 4th and don’t even think of telling me that cr** about losing my vote or wasting it. What does that mean in democracy? Don’t give me zombie talk, I am no zombie. I am still thinking and will continue to do so even as I vote.

Lively chat on social media as Dida steals the show

Deep inside the Jubilee and CORD campaigns

High drama: Uhuru may be disqualified

What would you do if I told you something was not possible and then a few months down the road you asked me for a public clarification?

That is the situation that the Obama administration finds itself in now as the Kenyan government seeks clarification on its’ position concerning the candidature if two ICC suspects in the race for the Kenyan presidency and vice presidency.

“But Obama said…??”

Well it is very simple. President Obama’s video message was targeted at the electorate whilst Johnny Carson’s message was a reminder to the government of Kenya. Obama is a politician, remember? Were you expecting him to say in his message of goodwill to Kenyans that Uhuru is not suitable? That would be taking sides. It would suggest that America is dictating your choice by disqualifying one of your most popular candidates.

Kenyans are a very intelligent lot and the big mystery here is why it has taken so long to sink into our brains that a Uhuru candidature for the presidency is dicey at best.

Let’s go for “kamwana” (what enthusiastic voters are calling Uhuru all over Central province and beyond. It means the young man) but on condition that we can forget about cordial normal relations with America, UK and a host of other European countries. Kenyans may be barred from seeking further education in those countries, investors will shun us, companies may eve close down because of the economic impact of a Uhuru presidency.

It is worth noting that all this mess is courtesy of one William Ruto who thought that he would outsmart the entire Western world, after all Kenya is a sovereign state band in the middle of an island where we are self sustaining. Let’s see what colour rabbit he will pull out of his magic hat next, because he will definitely do something.

Already the Kenya shilling is sliding and looks set for an unprecedented free fall. But can emotionally charged Kenyans see the writing on the wall? Or are they waiting to be laid off enmasse for them to understand a very simple issue?

How will Uhuru supporters react to their man being disqualified?
What triggered the current chain of events...
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