Statement From Kumekucha About Raila Kshs 100 Note

About two hours ago one of our contributors, a known PNU supporter calling herself PKW- Proud Kikuyu Woman posted an illustration of a Kshs 100 note with Prime Minister designate, Raila Odinga on it instead of the usual old photograph of Jomo.

My first reaction was that of suspecting mischief from PKW. Especially because of the timing of the post. However I could not help noticing how good the people's president looked on the note. Much better than Jomo for sure. I started imagining how good he would look on a Kshs 1,000 note or on a brand new kshs 5000 note for that matter. After all the man has made history by being only the second Prime Minister Kenya has ever had. As opposed to the Kibaki presidency which will be remembered for many messes culminating in a stolen election. The truth is that Kibaki's image is unlikely to be used in any Kenyan currency say 100 years from now. As for Raila I would bet that even 500 years from now a Kenyan note is bound to have the PM designate's image on it.

Then I thought that PKW must have changed to become a Raila fan because the duly elected president's image is on a Kshs 40 coin so maybe she was telling us something putting Raila's image on a higher denomination currency.

PKW, I believe that it is only right that you explain yourself and to the readers of Kumekucha what your motive really was posting that photograph to mainly catch our overseas and especially American readers as they come for the daily dose of Kenya's most liked blog.

The truth is that while we allow divergent views here and have welcomed yours here, it is only fair that you desist from posting provocations and even if you want to criticize, you should do so constructively and explain exactly why you have called the Prime Minister designate "Mtukutu". Who has proved to be more "mtukutu" thus far PNU or ODM?

As a rule and in the spirit f open debate and welcoming of all shades of views, it has been my policy never to delete posts, even when I strongly disagree with them. Older readers of Kumekucha will remember the nonsense a man calling himself Vikii used to post here, just before the elections.

However in this case if you do not explain yourself, I will be left with no alternative but to delete your post.

Over to you PKW.

P.S. My dear readers I have not made the sacrifices I have made thus far with Kumekucha to be bought with money when the struggle is so close to victory.


Want to be an automatic US citizen, Just die in Iraq

Transcript of air traffic control conversation with eyewitness aircraft to the strangest accident ever in aviation history. The mystery has still to be conclusively solved. But you can be a sleuth now and take a crack at it.

Curse of Celebrating Half Measures

Kenyans have been reduced to perennially celebrating plastic feats following every self-inflicted crisis in our 45 years history as an independent country. While the whole country was overwhelmed in celebrating a peace deal whose cause needed not happen in the first place, the TRIBAL PRINCIPALS have speedily minted themselves in two sides of the same scoundrel coin.

Our political naivety has left us serially RAPED of our basic rights. Our attention has been cleverly diverted from the ultimate price of unadulterated CONSTITUTION anchored on equity and justice. Meanwhile we are busy overindulging in sideshows as the principals partition our national hearts.

Trust our national calamities to come in doubles. The STOLEN elections were promptly followed by SEXED KCSE ranking. Raping the democratic and professional pillars leaves our national backside not only exposed but stinking to the world with far-reaching devastating consequences. Success premised on DECEPTION at any cost unwittingly seems to be our national forte.

Cheap slogans
Kenyan is headed into the long haul to the pits of self-destruction. The electorate do their bit by ushering in more than 60% of new MPs who amazingly learn the selfish ropes too fast to engage in any course to restore our national pride. All we have are people parading out sweet nothings to soothe the electorates’ egos while the eyes remain singularly trained on feathering their nests.

Change to us means rotating different shapes of asses for the same seat. Just look at the brand new speaker Kenneth Marende defending the obscene MPs’ salary. Learning fast from Kaparo before him Marende has already acquired a forked tongue to effectively warm himself to the bosoms of his subjects.

As Kenyans we are shameless consumers of TOKENISM. Instead of demanding better, we fall over ourselves in licking the bottom of any bowl thrown at us. The 6% economic growth almost succeeded for the decoy it was in persuading us to bend over as the architects pounded us from behind. We are still smarting from the raw wounds.

Make no mistake! We never fail to author high-sounding national policy papers whose spirit and intent are designed to die even before coming off the press. The CDF is a case in point and please spare me the latent insult of a lecture on its noble intention.

Stolen revolution
Kenya is suffering from debilitating effects of botched revolutions. Engaging and appreciating half measures is our bane. We are unrivalled perfectionists of reverse logic. Now the whole nation is a buzz discussing custom-tailored limo for an office yet to be inaugurated. Imagining the price to the taxpayers only leaves the contents of your intestines threatening to explode. The hitherto loudmouths have purchased high density zips for their lips leaving their shameless apologists to masquarade as mind readers.

Two wrongs never made a right and we must remain vigilant in securing the environment that will enable us reclaim our country from the claws of present scoundrels. Our concerns cannot be cheapened to whining. Silence in the face of any crisis is akin to abetting the malice.

The ultimate price of ignoring politics is poor governance whose product is lack of infrastructure for any sustainable growth. We must demand better from our leaders NOW.

The “Sina Makosa” Grand Coalition And The Mouth-Watering Safaricom IPO

We are going to discuss some very serious business in this post. The problem is that it is bound to upset many of you see-no-evil-hear-no-evil-on-the-coalition faithful dear readers of Kumekucha. Kindly bear with me, my brothers and sisters. It is all nothing but the truth. I have checked and cross-checked my facts and I have confirmed all the sensitive information.

But fortunately, I am not some heartless brute, so to make “the medicine” a little less bitter and unpleasant to take, I have tied this article to African music. I am sure most of you folks out there in the Diaspora love African/Kenyan music and many folks back home too. So do I. My all-time favourite is a Les Wanyika song called Nimaru.

I have a fascinating tale to tell you today about how a hit song destroyed a soul and I was there to witness some of the destruction as it was happening, so I can tell this story first hand.

In my view the late Omar Shaban, of Les Wanyika better known as Prof Omari is the best rhythm guitarist to have ever walked the shores of Eastern Africa and beyond. But many people do not know the story behind the smash hit Les Wanyika song, Sina Makosa.

Actually Prof Omari and bassist Tom Malanga (both Tanzanians playing their music in Kenya then) left Simba Wanyika to form the legendary Les Wanyika together. They were joined by two other fellow Tanzanians namely, John Ngereza and Issa Juma.

To launch the group, they needed to head straight to the recording studios and release a hit. And the song had to be a hit if the new group was to survive. There was hardly time to come up with something new, so Prof Omari dug out an old song that he had composed together with George Kinyonga of Simba Wanyika before he left. The reason why they did not record the song was because it was too similar to another Simba Wanyika song that had been recorded called Diana. That song was Sina Makosa.

Sina Makosa released in 1979, became the smash hit that Les Wanyika and Prof Omari are best remembered for. I watched as the flood of money that poured in from the song completely destroyed Prof Omari. He womanized excessively and he took to drinking more and more potent whisky. Eventually it slowed down his fingers on the guitar.

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KCSE Top-up Marks Ruins a Generation

By SEXING up last year's KSCE results, the Ministry of Education has unwittingly embarked on a journey to destroy the future of a whole generation. The pain and trauma caused by recalling examination results for readjustment is immeasurable. A failed examination council spells irreversible DOOM for Kenya's future.

Let us face it. The controversial results will have ripple effects that will reverberate worldwide. The loss of credibility in the eyes of global institutions which have hitherto trained Kenya's best brains. Kenyan students and graduates may soon find it very difficult securing admission and job vacancies outside our borders.

Nature NEVER defies the basic normal distribution which captures the indisputable central limit theorem. All excellent grades in any school must end up being weighted down by average performance. That last year's KCSE results were SEXED up is irrefutable. You can't fail to smell odours of our primitive politics rearing its ugly head in all these where schools in the right locations had 100% performances.

Superlative deception
Even a class of exclusive geniuses must produce the best and worst. It is disheartening to read that our schools are NOT spared our national pastime of hell-for-leather mentality to succeed at any cost. The most ridiculous was to have some schools ordering their candidates to buy mobile phones as accessories to aid in exam cheating.

It is the height of unforgivable irresponsibility to see Minister Ongeri trivialize such a phenomenon crisis to mere numbers. His claim that only about 4000 students were affected is not only insensitive but exposes the utter contempt Kenyan leaders hold their electorate. Never before has a leader played Russian roulette with many lives.

The only way to save face is to have last year's exams remarked and schools re-ranked. No amount of time buying will wash. The stakes here are phenomenally high. Just like the stolen polls, all went wrong at the headquarters with tallying. We must not allow the antics of vote stealing to be replicated in facets of our lives. It is a national shame.

The year 2007 will definitely go down in history as Kenyan's worst in all spheres. We are unwittingly processing a colossal heard of lost generation. And the effects of this superlative deception will surely come back to haunt us as a nation with devastating consequences.

Why Is Biwott Transferring Assets Now?

When we were all busy worrying about the post election tensions and turmoil, nobody remembered to analyze exactly what happened in the last elections and especially how the giants fell. Actually one of the major shocks of last december’s general elections was the felling of political giant, Nicholas Kipyator Biwott by a nobody in his Keiyo South constituency. Jackson Kiptanui Kiplagat of ODM garnered 30,380 votes to Biwott’s paltry 9,483.

So for the first time since the late seventies, Biwott is not an MP.

Biwott's son-in-law mentioned in the Kroll report: Charles Field Marsham

But what should worry Kenyans even more is what Biwott is up to now that he is away from the political limelight and can spend much more time on his colossal business empire. The reason why Kenyans must forever be interested in Biwott is really simple but let me spell it out here. We know how Bill Gates made his money and we also know how the Rockefeller family (descendants of JOHN D. Rockefeller) made their money. Closer to home we have a pretty good idea of how Manu Chandaria came to own so many prosperous companies. Now my question is simple, How did Nicholas Biwott make his money? If I may put it bluntly he made his seed money from stealing public money and taking hefty bribes for major government projects. The Turkwell Gorge Hydroelectric project made Biwott, to name one colossal project.

Nick Biwott: Lost by over 20,000 votes

Sources inform this writer that in recent times the former Keiyo South legislator has been very busy transferring huge funds to the most unlikely of destinations. And that is Canada. The leaked Kroll report told us that the Moi’s for example have been getting pretty nervous and have transferred a lot of their funds to an African country called Namibia. We also know that if push comes to shove accounts in Switzerland and elsewhere can be frozen. So behind this backdrop why would Nicholas Biwott transfer vast sums of his ill-gotten wealth to Canada of all places?

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Converting a Born-Again Over Easter

It is Good Friday today. Sister Mary Ann works with the aged in one of the church-sponsored homes in Nairobi. This Easter Friday she is driving to visiting home bound patients when all over a sudden she runs out of fuel. Luckily enough an Oil Libya petrol was just a kilometre away.

So Sister Mary Ann walks to the station to borrow a jerrycan can and buy some gas. Rasta, the attendant respectfully apologizes by telling her that the only container they owned had just been loaned out but she could wait until it was returned if she didn’t mind.

Since it was almost lunch hour and Sister Mary Ann wanted to deliver her presents over lunch, she chose not to wait and walked back to her car. She looked for any container in her car that she could use to carry fuel and spotted the bedpan she was taking to one of the beg-bound patients.

So the resourceful Sister Mary Ann carries the bedpan to the petrol station and have it filled it unleaded super fuel. She delicately balances the full bedpan back to her car and as
she pours the gas into her tank, two born-again Christians Karish and Waf watch in amazement across the street at.

Bewildered Karish turns to Waf and declares emphatically, "If the car starts, I'm converting to Catholic straightaway."

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Indulging in Koinange street activities and dreaming big....

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Introducing Dawa Ya Kumekucha (D.K.) By Chris

“David, David! We are waiting for you and your wife in the sitting room. Don’t forget to come with the proof,” George, David’s father, said loudly outside his son’s bedroom.

Assembled in the sitting room were the elders of the clan, uncles, aunts and David’s mother. The day before, they had witnessed the colourful wedding of their son to Susan, a tall beautiful lady. This is the same one they were all gathered to ‘crown’ as their ‘new’ daughter. But first, “Had she passed the acid test?”

The people gathered in the sitting room were growing impatient. David’s mother broke the silence by mumbling something about David and his wife taking too long, and shuffled her feet towards her son’s bedroom to remind them of their critical obligation to the ‘clan’!
David, in response, asked to be given two minutes for they were still preparing themselves. “Mum, you know it has been a long night. We’ve hardly slept a wink.” Even in the heat of the moment, his mother understood, or so she thought, that that was a joke and laughed heartily, in spite of herself.

“Two minutes! We don’t have the whole day here. Your uncles and aunts have to travel back to their homes today. You know what I mean.”

Inside the room, David and his wife were confused.
Read More…

Have a happy Easter!

Raila Odinga's Hot Number

Tuesday, 18^th March, 2008 was a great day for Kenya. The President signed into LAW the Constitution of Kenya Amendment Bill 2008. Like many Kenyans, I followed the proceedings keenly until I realized why they doze off. Speeches and legal lingo can bore even the most resilient.

I learned a lot though from Mwangi Kiunjuri, especially about the Frensh Reforusion. (Reminds me of a certain pucher who of late has gone off radar. Not that I miss her though). Parliament that day reminded me of opening day in my early school. Lots of hugs, kisses, animated prattle……... good old days. But beyond opening day and dozing in class, we have nothing else in common with my leaders. Oh! and the monos! I picked out a few wide-eyed monos in parliament. In my school we were not packed on benches like sardines. One bench sat two, a boy and a girl. Our classes were spacious and well ventilated. The contractor forgot to come back and fix doors and windows, leaving huge gaping spaces instead. At the risk of sending them deeper into slumber, I suggest that our parliamentarians borrow a leaf from our Tanzanian neighbours who make their laws atop comfortable swivel chairs. Or Rwanda where members use computers in parliament.

A girl is allowed to deviate from matters of great national importance to appreciate a well dressed Prime Minister Designate. I’m no fashionista but in my view, Raila Amolo Odinga looked hot! If you thought colour pink is all cotton candy, bubble gum and babies, think again. There is something alluring about pink. Maybe that’s because psychologically it is known to have a calming effect. In fashion land, a man who wears pink exudes confidence, yet is sensitive. By combining pink with a dark, well tailored suit (probably fedexed straight from Armani headquarters), Raila did his upcoming position justice. I’ve since forgiven him for wearing ugly socks to the beach a few weeks back. No comparisons here but if we made Michuki’s wife apologize for his torn socks, Ida deserves Kudos for Agwambo’s elegance. She may have saved the tax payer a state sponsored stylist for the PM.

I wish I could have equally rosy words for all other Members some of whom deserve a bed in the fashion casualty ward.

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Breaking News: Rustlers Kill 25 in Baringo

Suspected Samburu cattle rustlers have killed at least 25 people around Lake Baringo (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/7306597.stm). Villagers in Baringo district reported witnessing more that 200 Samburu raiders descended on the village on Wednesday evening firing indiscriminately before making away with hundred of animals.

This Baring massacre may not be news in the typical Kenyan sense but it exposes the fragile nation that is Kenya. The fact that many Kenyans would readily term such a massacre as normal cattle rustling is akin to the police commissioner claiming an MP's death is normal robbery. We must have sunk very low morally and otherwise to treat loss of human life so casually.

This incident is another apt wake up call for Kenya and her people to redefine and re-evaluate themselves as a people. The present political smiling from ear to ear amounts to nothing but patching a fatally tattered nation. A country that trivializes the security of her people is nothing but a geographical jungle hosting her citizens. The Saboat and Mungikis are not mere accidents. We must exterminate militias of any shade within our borders, no more no less.

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Are You a Thankful Being?

How vulnerable is Prime Minister Odinga?

It beats me when people say one thing while in essence they mean something totally different: they say 'red' when they mean 'black'. This kind of vacillation is very evident especially in matters concerning the weather. When it's cold, they want it hot; when it's hot, they want it freezing! (Blue blistering b…!)

The poem below, which I wrote on 5th of May 1997, was occasioned by this human response to the capricious quality of weather.

God's Country

The sun rises with renewed anger,
With rage, it 'serves' its heat,
To the life below;
People cower,
Plants shrink and droop –
Heat by day, cold by night,
Days turn to months.

Plants, angered by this routine,
Refuse to bear fruit,
Making futile the efforts of man,
To till, level and sow,
On dry ground,
Famine envelops the country

Leaves turn brown and crispy,
Shed they are, wanted no more,
Plants wither and zap! disappear,
People grow thin
And, a ‘sun tan's’ a must.

After months on end,
Clouds sparsely gather,
Becoming a big, black mass,
They growl, declaring war on sun,
Then they spit to the ground,
Their hard-earned spittle.

Plants less with anger,
And full of bloom, sprout,
Giving the country a green,
Expanse of leafy mass,
That promises fruit,
To hungry beings.

People gain weight,
Eating the fruits of their labour;
But then:
Mud spoils their shoes,
Colds cost their pay,
The weather spoils their day,
Is all thanks they have to God.

P.S.:- I love good poetry. I also love to write poems, in addition to other forms of writing. PKW, I love your poem, The Road in Flamingo. Hilarious, it is. The imagery it encapsulates is overly fascinating.


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How Vulnerable Is The Prime Minister?

There are some Kenyans who insist that politics in Kenya is now going to be pretty boring with a grand coalition and no opposition in parliament. Of course these naïve Kenyans have no idea what they are talking about.

Already the people’s hero, Raila Odinga is sitting on what will shape up to be one of the hottest political seats ever created in these shores. As usual most Kenyans have failed to read the small print and would prefer to wait for a Tsunami before they scrutinize that all important section.

One of the things that is bound to influence politics considerably and make any prime minister vulnerable is the fact that parliament needs only a simple majority to send the premier home. And don't forget that unlike a vote of no confidence on the president, it does not send the MPs back to the polls. In fact it can be done one lazy afternoon with 60 or so legislators in the house. And even with a full house, there are a lot of people in PNU who would vote with the Kalenjin community to remove the PM, yesterday. Yep. It is pretty easy to pass a vote of no confidence on the prime minister, meaning that poor Agwambo will feel the heat from day one. Still his supporters will tell you that the man is fireproof.

Now let us take a purely hypothetical situation. Say the Kalenjin community in parliament for some reason are not happy with their arap Mibei, the PM. We all know that thanks to former president Moi’s wily ways, the Rift Valley has numerous MPs and most of them are from the sparsely populated Kalenjin community. What this means is that they would need to team up with a small party within PNU like Narc and they would be able to garner enough numbers to send the Prime Minister home. By the way Narc is also pretty jittery about the grand coalition and one man called Danston Mungatana keeps on making all sorts of noises at press conferences against it.

Anyway, this little political reality about the PM is what will make the cabinet list of the grand calition the most interesting and titillating read for Kenyans since David Mailu’s After 4:30 novelette released in the 70s to feverish sales. Or since Robert Ludlum’s last edge-of-the-seat suspense thriller (you take your pick).

A section of Kalenjin MPs have already said that the fairest thing would be for the ODM side of the grand coalition cabinet to have at least half the MPs from their community. And with good reason. Not only does this group have numerical power in parliament, but no other community contributed more and sacrificed more to partly reverse the stolen election of last December. In fact the contribution of the Kalenjin cannot be compared to that of all other communities put together. They are the reason why we now have a grand coalition government.

So the first thing to look out for in the list (that could even be released today) is if their request has been fulfilled by Arap Mibei. If it has then it is only fair to expect the community to be the most powerful block in the 10^th parliament.

If the request hasn’t been met, then you can expect some fireworks within ODM.

However knowledgeable experts say that it will be impossible for arap Mibei to fulfill this particular request and what will most probably happen is that the cabinet will have a substantial representation from the Kalenjin community and Arap Mibei will then cut other deals with the community to appease them. The truth is that whatever ODM supporters say, the survival of the premier heavily depends on his treating the Kalenjin well.

Which brings us to another thorny issue. What do you think the Prime Minister would do if he were to find a Kalenjin member of the cabinet involved in corruption. My dear readers I leave that question with you.

P.S. Apparently my post of yesterday depicting the burning of Kenyans in Naivasha did not reveal my position clearly concerning George Saitoti’s planned prosecution of poll violence perpetrators. Let me make my stand and that of many Kenyans clear in one sentence. Prosecute everybody or prosecute nobody. And by everybody I mean Martha Karua, Kivuitu and cronies, Kabando wa Kabando, George Saitoti etc.

Incidentally a poll carried out by KTN last night showed that 39% of Kenyans are for amnesty to all post election violence perpetrators. I am sure these are the Kenyans who understand that justice is always extremely selective in Kenya.

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Viva!! Okoiti Omtata

I know you are all eagerly awaiting the new cabinet lineup with great anticipation. Whether the list is fair or representative is an argument that will last us the next two weeks. Whether the new list is a win/loss for PNU/ODM or Raila/Kibaki is a fight that is just about to begin.

As we embark on further fracturing our country based on the impending cabinet list, please remember those who have paid the ultimate price. On a lighter note, please keep Omtata in mind. Whatever direction the country takes, it should be to appease none other than Omtata, a professional who joined the regular folk on the streets (unlike most of you who vegetated on the keyboard) without fear.

Folks, this is a man of unchained valor and incredible light body weight. A man who vehemently displayed great defiance even when walking on thin air.

Aluta Continua!!

Update by Kumekucha
I salute you Omtata, bado mapabano, the 2nd republic is not here yet.

But you my brother have proved that just one person can make a difference.

I take off my hat to you.

-Kumekucha on behalf of the voiceless masses of Kenya many of whom are still in IDP camps-

Ethnic Diversity In The Workplace

By Shiko Of Mombasa

A Kenyan complained in the Daily Nation recently that out of 421 short-listed applicants at the State Law Office, 124 (30%) were from the same community. We may not expect every office to accommodate every tribe but the arithmetic in this case is rather off kilter. If the 70% balance is to be shared by even a half of the other tribes, do the arithmetic and you’ll know why Kenyans are so bitter with one another. This situation is duplicated in many other instances. In the recent clandestine police recruitment that was later nullified, 80% of those accepted were from just 4 regions. Kenyans have no problem being from different tribes. They have a problem with inequality and such anomalies must be redressed if we are expected to live together as one happy family.

What Kenya needs is not war cries and machetes but civilized mechanisms to fight the tribalism monster. One idea would be the formation of a commission mandated to oversee balanced ethnic, age and gender diversity in employment, both in the public and private sectors. Career progression could also be thrown in the mix to curb discriminative promotions. The commission would have to be well legislated with a strong constitution, otherwise some elites might use it as an avenue to enrich themselves and incubate worse bitterness among wananchi. With a head office plus regional offices country wide, and a strong database, it should periodically monitor recruitment and dismissals. At any one time it should be able to avail to Kenyans a general report on the ethnic, age and gender balancing of workers in organizations like KRA, Treasury or Local Government for example. Needless to say, the commission must itself be a representative of all the ethnic groups in the country and be completely autonomous (free from politicians and other interested groups). It should also have some powers to name and shame as well as impose fines on employers who do not tow the line.

The commission would obviously have to take things gradually, starting with government and other public offices, and spreading to the private sector in the course of time. With time, it should have all major and not so major organizations in it’s database with the support of the law so that it remains in force even with change of governments. I’m not

by any means suggesting firing and replacing of workers en-masse but I see no reason why it’s first job should be to oversee a thorough audit of the ministries and then a balanced inter-ministerial reshuffling. There are some government offices where everyone is considered Tribe X and addressed in language X until proven otherwise.

It’s a behemoth task and a logistical nightmare, and I’ll be the first to admit that such a feat is not easy, but what is? A repeat of the recent fighting in future, albeit worse? Kenya does not lack for brilliant men and women who can run an organization of this kind. We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as impossible situations. Kenya can choose either to use the opportunity to mend herself or bury her head in the sand and let things smooth themselves out. They’ve been smoothing themselves out since independence and see where we landed.

The benefits of such a move will obviously not be immediately felt. Rather we’ll be laying good groundwork for our future generations.

The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees opportunity in every difficulty.

Why PNU evidence against Kalenjin leader is "useless."

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Charge Everybody, Especially The Fat Cats

The mobs went house to house, looking for certain people. Grace Kakai, a police commander in Naivasha, said a large crowd of Kikuyus chased a group of Luos through a slum, trapped them in a house, blocked the doors and set the house afire. Police found 19 bodies huddled in one room, and Ms. Kakai said some of the children’s bodies were so badly burned that they could not be identified.

“All I can say is that they were school age,” she said.

In the past few days, many Kikuyus have organized into militias, saying they are now ready for revenge.

The human being is an amazing creation that adopts very quickly to take in even the most terrible tragedies and still survive. By the time this heinous crime took place in Naivasha, the Kenyan public had long been hardened. Still no newspaper in the country dared to carry this photograph.

But where was the international press to give it equal prominence as the burning of other Kenyan children and women in a church in Eldoret that had happened earlier?

There are clear signs that Internal security minister, George Saitoti is about to begin prosecuting perpetrators, inciters and financiers of atrocities of the unprecedented post-election violence that we witnessed last December. Sadly these prosecutions will be done the usual Kenyan way. Meaning that it will be highly selective. So that those behind the Naivasha killings will go scott free while those of the Eldoret church incident will NOT.

And worse still the perpetrators, inciters and financiers of the presidential vote rigging that triggered the whole thing will also NOT be touched. Indeed as you read this those guys are enjoying plum jobs paid for by you and me and the victims of the worst violence Kenya has ever seen including the ordinary folk many of whom have lost something; a job, a livelihood, a thriving business etc. These people include the likes of Samuel "did you see us beating anybody?" Kivuitu and his disgraced team of ECK commissioners who were appointed as part of an elaborate scheme to rubbish the will of the Kenyan people in the December 2007 elections. Kivuitu and his commissioners have refused to resign. Muta-do?

If George Saitoti wants his purge to gain support from the people of Kenya then he should start by prosecuting Samuel Kivuitu and his team of commissioners, they and the person(s) they were taking orders from were the most responsible for this heinous crime portrayed in the photograph we have carried here.

Their most disgusting and unacceptable vote rigging crime against the voiceless masses of Kenya MUST be punished.

P.S. I have increasingly found that a lot of the raw information I have I am NOT able to use in the public domain and especially here in Kumekucha. I have therefore decided to launch a private facility called Kumekucha’s raw notes

where I openly share the very latest hot information I have weekly, and especially what I am NOT able to use directly in Kumekucha. I will charge a mere $15 (or Kshs 990) for one full years subscription to this information. If you are interested in subscribing to this hot info drop me an email NOW at umissedthis at yahoo dot com and I will give you further details of what you need to do.

By subscribing to Kumekucha’s raw notes, you will also be helping to finance the continued existence and enhanced quality of Kumekucha.

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Beautiful Face of Unity of Purpose

Kenyan politicians appear to have discovered the nation’s pulse. The fidelity of their actions and speeches with the national expectation only leave one wondering and imagining the missed leaps in the face of sectarian politics so far.

You listen to Kibaki talking and for once you see the human side of the MP for Othaya. In Having all MPs read from the same OBJECTIVE script stirs up the imagination of the collective strength we have as a people. My prayer is they don’t lose the momentum and let no Lucifer crawl from the dark wood works to spoil the national broth.

Uniformity of thought can make a single step look like a milestone. Politics is an ugly animal we cannot do without as human beings. Those haranguing Kenyans to stop politicking don’t have a clue of what foundation governance provides for any shade of prosperity and development. No amount of personal wealth can provide an inch of infrastructure that networks every corner of a country. Only sound planning implemented by honest and good leadership can provide that link.

Decoys and trophies
Demanding better from our leader must not be mistaken for nagging or laziness. Leadership is a contract and we must demand that our politicians keep their side of the bargain lest they defraud us by sleeping on the job. It is cheap and uncritical to admonish Kenyans for demanding the very best of their leaders.

The new-found unity of purpose must not be left to melt once the political deal is sealed. We must continue putting more pressure on our politicians to earn their hefty pay cheque. And while at it we must remain vigilant to calculative politicians who may be scheming to dupe us with decoys while intending to run away with the trophy.

We Collectively have a unique opportunity to put Kenya on the right pedestal to sustainable development anchored on unity in diversity. Do you part and let us join the party and make it last.

Parliament Debates Crucial Bills

15h45 Local Time - Historic Day for Kenya

Kenya parliament is currently debating historic bills. The Justice Minister had earlier moved the motion seeking to pass the Constitution of Kenya Amendment Bill 2008. The next motion will be the National Accord and Reconcilliation Bill. Both bills are aimed at legalising the peace agreement that was signed by Raila Odinga and President Kibaki on 28/Feb/2008.

President Mwai Kibaki has just arrived (nearly two hours late) in parliament and is surprisingly occupying the seat of Leader of Government Business, and has asked Raila to join him on the government side. It is significant that Kalonzo was initially forced to move to No.3 on government front benches, but is now sitting next to Mudavadi on the official opposition benches. Both Raila and Kibaki are now contentedly seating on government side and those who were at the end of that bench have now had to move to the back bench. Is he discreetly telling us that Raila is NOW leader of government business? Only time will tell.

Earlier, George Saitoti had raised tension in the house by launching a scathing attacking on some MPs who supported violence in Rift Valley, particularly where innocent people were burnt in a church in Eldoret. (I wonder why he did not mention those who were burnt to death in Naivasha or was it an attempt to campaign for the Deputy PMs seat)

All speakers have supported the Constitution of Kenya Amendment Bill 2008 and it is likely going by the mood of the house, this bills will sail without a hitch. The Kalonzos, Mutulas, Nyongos and Kajwangs of this world are singing the same song.

The speaker reminded members that the last time the Kenya constitution was amended by parliament in 1982 when the then KANU government (outlawed multi-party) and made Kenya a dejure one party state, it took ten long painful and agonising years to undo this amendment.

Update added by Chris 5:23 pm Kenyan Time
For the first time in the history of Kenya a sitting president has contributed to debate in parliament. Usually Kenyan presidents just give speeches.

President Kibaki gave his lengthy contribution in his capacity as member for Othaya shortly after that of Prime Minister designate Raila Odinga as member for Langata.

I was touched by the impact this crisis seems to have had on our president's health. I have never heard him repeating himself or rambling on and on which is exactly what happened at one juncture and seemed to cause considerable anxiety on the government front benches but fascination from the rest of the house.

The president emphasized that God must love Kenya a great deal and went on to mention God more times in this speech than in all his previous speeches (since he became president) put together. He went on to insinuate that the place where the country was going before the peace deal was reached, was really scary. His excellency Mwai Kibaki also emphasized the fact that the young people of Kenya (new generation) have no room for tribalism in the way they think or do their things. He noted that this younger generation have settled all over the world and are making a huge impact in many societies, not to mention the fact that they send money back home for development and other activities.

President Kibaki caused laughter and indeed surprise when he pointed out that all that was needed to have a new constitution in Kenya was to give the whole job to Orengo (James). He added that Hon Orengo knows all that they have been discussing in the previous failed attempts to get a new constitution and was bound to come up with a document that would be acceptable to all, the president said.

The mood in parliament was one of unanimous agreement to the bill and cordial behaviour to each other. This was only broken briefly on two occasions. Firstly when in an apparent slip of the tongue Gitobu Imanyara while contributing to debate said that the rest of Africa would always measure the standards of their election against the one that took place in Kenya. There was uproar from the ODM side and even the PNU back benches and it took several minutes for the speaker to restore order. The other time was when the mover of the motion Martha Karua stood to move the motion after debate and warned against the use of insensitive language referring to member Otieno Kajwangs referring to a "stolen election" in his remarks.

Voting is now going on and although the ayes have it, since this is a constitutional amendment bill, numbers have to be verified so that the two thirds majority required to pass the bill is attained.

Update by Chris 6:21 PM Kenyan Time
Parliament has voted to extend sitting beyond the usual 6:30 PM Meanwhile the first bill has been passed unanimously with all 200 members in the house voting for it. There were no nays and no abstentions. The Constitutional amendment bill has been passed and now awaits presidential accent to become law.

Last Update 10:05 PM Kenyan Time
The Two Bills; Constitution of Kenya Amendment Bill 2008 and the National Accord and Reconciliation Bill have sailed through parliament both receiving unanimous support from the members. The first one has already been signed into law by the President and the second one is expected to be signed later tonight.

Effectively Kenya has changed forever and it is expected that even tomorrow the president could announce his new cabinet and officially acknowledge Raila Odinga as Prime Minister since the post is now entrenched in the constitution. This is hardly the time to go to sleep. Kenyans need to be as alert as ever. This is just the beginning of the long hard road to true change in Kenya.

P.S. As if to confirm my earlier story on William Ruto, Internal security minister George Saitoti told parliament earlier today that inciters, perpetrators and financiers of post election violence will not be spared. President Kibaki while attending a passing out parade for police cadets at Kiganjo earlier in the day said exactly the same thing. It seems that a major purge is in the offing. Let us now wait and see what happens.

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Is William Ruto In Danger Of Being Arrested?

No other politician in Kenya today elicits such strong emotion either of strong hate or extreme fondness. Even Agwambo himself has not been able to keep up with this younger man where extreme emotions from the public are concerned. More so as the latter has tried to mellow down his radical image in preparation for the highest office in the land.

I am of course referring to William Ruto.

Although ODM insiders vehemently deny it, there is a lot of tension within ODM at the moment. In fact the anxiety is much higher than it ever was in the ODM-K days when there was heightened rivalry between Kalonzo Musyoka and Raila Odinga over who would be the party’s presidential nominee.

William Ruto is right at the centre of that heightened tension within ODM today.

This is the man who rubbished the decades of experience of retired former President Moi right across the Rift Valley and delivered virtually the entire Kalenjin community to Arap Mibei (as Raila is fondly referred to by the Kalenjins.)

PNU hardliners have always secretly sworn to deal with Ruto whom they accuse of being the chief orchestrator of the unprecedented violence in the Rift Valley. Interestingly this tough talk against Ruto has not ended with the signing of the peace deal, if anything it has increased considerably and impeccable sources tell this writer that evidence that links Ruto to the killings is being gathered even as you read this. Of course it is possible that this evidence is being put together for blackmail purposes. However this possibility is highly unlikely.

Apart from this evidence being gathered against their man, there are other factors responsible for the heightened tension amongst the Kalenjin community within ODM. The Kalenjin strongly feel that whatever has...

Read more

Why the evidence PNU claim to have on Ruto is useless

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Will Grand Coalition Cabinet Reflect The Face of Kenya?

Now that President Kibaki has confirmed that he is about to reshuffle and name the complete grand coalition cabinet, it is only fair that we ask before-hand if this cabinet will reflect the face of Kenya.

Every other cabinet Kibaki has constituted since 2002 has been grossly unfair in terms of regional distribution. However, things are a significantly different this time round because ODM is expected to nominate worthy individuals whom the president will name to the cabinet. ODM will constitute 50% of the cabinet as well as provide the Prime Ministers and one of the two deputies.

This time round, and for the sake of healing this nation, Kibaki must do some sound mathematics.

In my opinion, the top ten cabinet positions - and indeed the entire public service - should be made regionally representative for all the people of Kenya to feel a sense of belonging in this country.

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Related: Democracy Must Work For Every Citizen
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The current top-ten political/cabinet seats as they will be are;

1. PNU: President & Head of State: Mwai Kibaki (Kikuyu – Central Province)
2. ODM-K/PNU: Vice President: Kalonzo Musyoka (Kamba – Eastern Province)
3. ODM: Prime Minister & Head of Government: Raila Odinga (Luo – Nyanza Province)
4. ODM: Deputy Prime Minister: Musalia Mudavadi – (Luhya - Western)
5. PNU: Deputy Prime Minister: (not known) – (not known)
6. PNU: Justice & Constitutional Affairs – Martha Wangari Karua (Kikuyu – Central)
7. PNU: Finance: Amos Kimunya: (Kikuyu – Central)
8. KANU/PNU: Defence: Yusuf Hajji (Somalia) North Eastern
9. FORD-K/PNU: Foreign Affairs: Moses Wetangula (Luhya – Western)
10. PNU: Internal Security: George Saitoti (Maasai/Kikuyu - Rift Valley/Central)
    

It is apparent that the PNU is over-crowding the top ten.

Kivuitu's Blundering Results

To begin with, Western Province, in addition to the National Assembly Speaker and the Attorney General already has more than enough. My take is that top public positions should not be monopolised like the way AG Wako and Head of Civil Service Muthaura have done for more than 10 years now. These two should be sent packing at the same time that the cabinet is being constituted. Perhaps Raila and Kibaki should consider appointing a minority to these two positions. In this case, an Indian or Samburu or even a Borana.

It will be a major cock-up if Kibaki were to fall into the hands of Mt. Kenya mafia and appoint the Deputy PM from the GEMA region. It seems obvious that Coast province has not received its due share of the national cake. Infact it is a raw deal. Women are also conspicuously missing from the top ten power arrangement in Kenya.

During Kibaki’s reign, Eastern province has and continues to be over-fed at cabinet level. My suggestion is for Kibaki to replace Kalonzo as VP and appoint a woman from Coast province to the post. Alternatively, he may consider appointing Martha Karua Deputy PM, but then the Justice ministry should be relinquished to ODM.

Kalonzo would be best suited to lead a coalition of opposition parties and be Leadr of Official Opposition in government. If Kalonzo and his ODM-K brigade must be in government, then out of 40 cabinet portfolios, Kibaki must be able to find one for him. I would suggest Water Development, or if environment and natural resources. We must appreciate the important role of the official opposition and that the opposition leads the PAC and PIC committees in the national assembly.

On the ODM side, we know is that Charity Ngilu and Sally Kosgey are heading to cabinet. They may also throw in Millie Odhiambo, or Sofia Abdi Omar, or gender activist Ms Rachel Shebeshwho were recently nominated to parliament on ODM ticket. Interestingly, Raila is already fulfilling part of his vision by sharing positions on a 50/50 basis between men and women. Apart from Martha Karua, who sadly hails from the same province as the president, I have not seen any other woman occupy a power seat in PNU. Dr. Naomi Shaban (Miji Kenda – Coast) has been given a nondescript portfolio and is yet to cut political teeth.

Stop Press 14h00 Local Time: Parliament is about to commence debate on the two critical bills, ie. Constitution of Kenya Ammendment Bill (2008) and the National Accord and Reconcilliation Bill. The president and prime minister designate are expected to attend this session. It is expected today's session will culminate into the creation of Kenya's historic Grand Coalition Government. Updates to follow.

Safaricom Introduces 20 Bob Scratch Card As Government Continues To Ignore The Masses

Although it has not officially been announced sources on the ground inform me that Safaricom agents started selling Kshs 20 (approx US 30 cents) scratch cards today.

Is it any wonder that Michael Joseph’s company is the most profitable outfit in East and Central Africa and probably beyond? And if you want to know their secret, it is really very simple. They listen to the common man and they don’t just listen, they act.

This is in sharp contrast to the political class who have no interest in the common man at all. In fact it is ion their best interests if the ordinary folk remain as poor as possible so that they can bribe them to vote them back into power when the elections come round again.

Ironically on the same day that 20 bob scratch cards were introduced there were running battles along Jogoo road where matatu touts and drivers went on strike over the inadequate facilities at the new matatu terminus in Muthurwa which was created when the government banned matatus from entering the CBD. One protestor interviewed by a local TV station put everything into perspective rather neatly. He said that there were many homes where there were at least 3 private cars. One for the husband, another for the wife and a third one to take children to school. So what was the logic of banning matatus from the CBD? It was better to ban private vehicles. He added that the government should realize that matatus served the majority whom they should take care of.

That simple logic awed me.

Now my question is simple. Will ODM’s enmtry into government change the way government does things? Will ODM succeed where ODM-K failed because I do not hear Kalonzo Musyoka talking about a 24 hour economy and the creation of jobs for ordinary Kenyans. If he fears getting fired...

Read more

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Kumekucha Special Features

The very first aviation accident
Fascinating accident this, aircraft accidents have surely come a long way

Kenyan man who was so much in love that he gave the girl of his dreams a deadly gift

Breaking News: Post-Poll Violence Pre-Planned

Human Rghts Watch group had released report indicating that post-election violence in Kenya was pre-planned (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/7300147.stm). According to the lobby political and business leaders organized and funded the ethnic cleansing that almost drove Kenya to abyss.

This report comes a time when alot of political ground has shifted since the signing of the peace deal between Kibaki and Raila on February 28. That Kenya will never be the same again since last year's disputed polls and the violence thereafter cannot be gainsaid. It is a tight rope we must walk in addressing these explosive past deeds as we chat the way forward. The onus is on us but are we upto the challenge?

Who Is Being Backed By The Americans?

You Will Never Guess… But They’ve Got It Wrong Yet Again…

There is great anxiety amongst many quarters in Kenya at the moment as to whom the Americans may be backing for the presidency after their Mwai Kibaki honeymoon ended rather unceremoniously with unprecedented blood-letting in Kenya.



If truth be told the Americans contributed a great deal in provoking the post election violence in Kenya by failing to read the mood on the ground and blindly assisting Mwai Kibaki to steal an election in such an obvious manner. It is on record that the World Bank continued to do business with the corrupt Kibaki government days before the elections and their point man, World Bank country director Colin Bruce not only boasted that he knew who would win the presidency, but he even put his sentiments in writing (remember the leaked memos?). This is behind a backdrop where polls showed a close race and one that favoured ODM’s Raila Odinga. The truth on the ground was that at no time was the presidential race in Kenya last December, close. Actually Raila had a very convincing win, bordering on a landslide as even the flawed results showed because he won 6 out of the 8 provinces very decisively indeed. But all that is now water under the bridge.

Any keen observer in International politics will quickly tell you that American foreign policy has really never succeeded anywhere. From Iraq to the mess they have created in neighboring Somalia by orchestrating the removal of a stable Islamic courts government when they had nothing feasible to replace it with. Power abhors a vacuum as any high school history student will tell you.

And the list of American failures in Africa goes on and on.

But nowhere is the consistent and spectacular failure of the Americans’ foreign policy more fascinating than it has been in Kenya.

They started off backing a brilliant young politician called Tom Mboya. Mboya had such influence at one point that it is said that he was easily able to access President John F. Kennedy any time he wanted. The shrewd Mboya on his part milked his relationship with the Yankies to the limit. For instance the famous airlifts to the US enabled hundreds of Kenyans to study in American universities. One of the famous beneficiaries of this is current Internal security minister Prof. George Saitoti.

To date the Americans have never gotten a better bet...

Read more...

P.S. William Ruto earlier today supported Musalia Mudavadi as ODM's choice for deputy Prime Minister. His action confirms the pressure and tension that is already building up within ODM over the upcoming Grand coalition government cabinet.

Sunday Doodles: Of Rides and Crazy Fellows

Have you ever travelled at the back of an open lorry on a rough, bumpy, country road? If you have, then, the poem below 'holds' a similar experience. I promise you, it’s not the best of experiences.

A ride I took on 22nd of December the year 2001 occasioned the poem below. I was travelling to a certain part of Central Kenya (some kilometres from Nyahururu) to attend the wedding ceremony of a friend. The place was Shamata.
To digress, Shamata is well known for two principal things: biting cold and potatoes. When I arrived at Shamata, I looked like a baboon as I had ridden at the back of a lorry. What with dust all over my face, clothes and shoes; swollen hands and a throbbing headache! (And to think I was to attend a wedding…) I hate to remember the experience.

Rough, Bumpy Ride

'twas on 22nd of December,
The year two thousand and one,
When the mother of all bumpy rides,
Called out my three names.

I took my place in the lorry;
Sweet peace inundated my heart,
As I thought of a smooth ride,
A ride to 'potato-infested' Shamata.

Hell broke loose,
When this crazy fellow,
Took the steering wheel,
And slammed on the gas pedal.

I was thrown up and backwards,
I danced sideways, east and west,
My whole body shook,
My blood froze.

My eyes popped out,
As I saw death calling me;
All the while, the crazy fellow,
Drove on in murderous frenzy.

In and out of every pothole,
Was the name of the game;
As I bumped my head,
I said my last prayer:

God you created this crazy guy,
You created me in the same style,
Why should I lose my life,
Because of his madness, why Lord?

God at once said:
I created you, Yes,
But I don't remember,
Telling you to be in this lorry!

With every mile we took,
Dust masked my face,
Red-brown dust,
Made me a human baboon.

As the lorry creaked and wailed,
So did my bones threaten,
Threaten to break,
If the crazy fellow didn't stop.

I cried and called out,
But the engine swallowed my voice,
So, ofcourse, I had no choice,
But to swallow the bitter pill.

At last,
The lorry drew to a stop,
After swallowing miles without number,
Miles I will live to curse.

The 'back' was opened,
And out jumped a baboon,
A baboon in white shirt and checked coat,
A baboon that asked for water.

All who saw me,
Nearly ran for their lives,
And shook their heads at a distance,
Wondering, why a baboon in Shamata.

But all said and nearly done,
I'll live to hate crazy fellows,
I'll live to detest blue lorries,
Which love to create baboons.

P.S.: - The driver of the lorry, an acquaintance of mine, was travelling to Shamata to get a consignment of potatoes to transport to Nairobi. I thought that by taking the lorry I would be saving on fare. But, in essence, I lost so much more than I had hoped to gain.

My two cents worth: Think twice before you plunge into things that you think could save you a certain cost. You could end up regretting!

Big Price of Uniting Political Foes

Current Kenyan political developments promise to help build political bridges and injure political and communal egos in equal measure. That ours is ethnic-based politics needs no gain saying. Accompanying this investment is the mandatory collateral to message the political egos of tribal lords.

Granted national peace is priceless and no effort must be spared to realize and sustain the same. Raila may be doing the most sensible thing in changing tact to sup with hitherto sworn political nemeses in the national interests with the wider picture as his guiding star. But before some political symbiosis takes place to have the same enthusiasm permeate to the numerous ethnic grassroots who supported him, his noble efforts may soon degenerate to disdain from the same masses who will promptly accuse him of betrayal.

Reconciling a nation still smelling embers of war is a kin to walking a political tight rope. True, you cannot please all the people all the time but time is of essence here to have all communities or at least most of their people on board. Hoping that they will eventually on their own see the need for peace through your lens without explicit explanations is to unwittingly inflame the same tensions the peace deal was designed to address.

Ticking time bomb
Kenya’s post election violence left individual communities with their own set apparatus for ‘self-defence’. Nothing has been officially done to dissuade these unofficial armies to disband. Instead some of them have transformed from rag tag vigilantes into potentially very destructive militia able to wage sustained skirmishes.

The present lull so far is premised on a satisfactory implementation of the peace deal. Our fate as a nation hangs on this fragile thread and shout fail, God forbid, trust of politicians to provide the much-need spark to the existing militia and the consequences are too grin to contemplate. This is not being an alarmist not a pessimist but our hope for sustained peace must be cognisant of the reality that Kenya is awash with militia waiting for the opportunity to be put to ‘good use’.

The only common threat joining politicians at the hip interest, nothing more. They do everything with their eyes singularly trained on votes. With out fractious ethnic voting blocks negotiating ourselves of the crisis can also be politically suicidal. The two principals in the present peace deal must redouble their efforts to rebrand Kenya as the ultimate trophy. But they must equally remain alive to the small dots that join to form final print.

Nobody is being a doomsayer here. Far from it because burying our heads in the sand of good news while conveniently ignoring explosive undercurrents is not only naive at best but to sit on a ticking time bomb at worst. Yes we want peace at WHATEVER COST but we must equally appreciate and remain a live to its ingredients.

Raila Odinga Now Approves Safaricom Sale

There is something very fishy going on.

Those in the know are fully aware that the Safaricom sale of shares to the public was bitterly contested by ODM last year in the run up to the General elections. And with good reason. For example as you read this we still do not know who the mystery owner of the 5 per cent stake in East Africa’s most profitable company is.

Jimmy Kibaki yesterday visited Hon Raila Odinga at Orange House where the two are said to have had tea. Amazingly had this photograph appeared here just 2 short weeks ago everybody would have said it was fake.

If truth be told, between last year and now, absolutely nothing has changed. Except that ODM leader Raila Odinga seems to have changed his mind.

Raila met yesterday with Finance Minister Amos Kimunya and even the finance minister who barely 4 months ago said that the Nairobi stock exchange was not a fish market in a thinly veiled personal attack targeting Hon Raila Odinga is now all of a sudden talking very respectfully about Raila. He referred to Raila and President Kibaki as “our two leaders” in a press conference where he appeared to be in a jovial mood, yesterday.

This is hardly the time for hero worship, but it is important that Hon Raila Odinga explains to the public what has brought about this change of heart. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy about the new found unity and co-operation between these two leaders who brought Kenya to it’s worst crisis yet and to the brink of civil war. Under these circumstances peace is very desirable above anything else, and I mean anything.

Still the public needs to know. If Hon Raila Odinga’s opposition of the Safaricom IPO last year was just mere politicking, he needs to tell Kenyans and then he also needs to apologize to the good people of Kenya.

This is also not the time for partisan politics because we are dealing with public property here. The Kenya government owns a large stake in safaricom on behalf of the Kenyan public and now it is about to sell what belongs to the good people of Kenya to individuals within the public.

What I can tell readers here authoritatively is that there is a very bad smell emanating from the Safaricom IPO. There are leads that I am currently following that could link the mysterious strengthening of the Kenya Shilling to the upcoming Safaricom IPO. In fact so far everything I see about this IPO points to the Kenyan ordinary folk being short changed.

It seems that the price Kenyans will have to pay for peace will be pretty high, at least in the short term.

Still my final word on this issue is that whatever the price, I am sure it is worth it. Better peace and let us pay it. After all one can never compare human life (which is priceless) to anything else under the sun. Still, I just thought that Kenyans should be informed.

Chaos in Mount Elgon: The Little Known Inside Story

Kumekucha Exclusive:
Yours truly managed to get somebody behind the scenes and deep inside the military operation that is going in right now in the Mount Elgon area. Our man ventured where no journalist or aid worker has reached. Here is their fascinating report complete with photographs;

Mt Elgon and IDPs

The Mount Elgon fighting is actually 2 battles in one. There is one tribal battle that spreads across from Uganda to Swam, Salama and Endebess on the Kenyan side and the Kapsakwony fighting that is about land and in particular the Chebeyuk settlement scheme that has been in contention since the early seventies.

The reason the Government is finding it so difficult to bring the fighting under control is that the real perpetrators are not in Kenya.

Lets clarify this. The Sabaot have 5 clans. The Bok clan. There are also the Bongowek, Ndorobo, Soy and Sebeii. The Sebeii are mainly in Uganda and lay claim to the Endebess, Swam, Salama region. This is the root cause of the fighting on this flank of the mountain. The main occupants from the Kenya side are the Bukusu. It is they that fill up most of the IDP camp in Endebess the enterprising Sebeii taking advantage of the the post election violence to launch their own offensive.

On the other side, a sub clan of the Bok, from which all the Mp’s and Councillors in Mt Elgon constituency come from is very powerful. This is the sub clan from which both the current and former MP come from. But the most dangerous thing about the Bok is their sheer capacity for violence and the fact that they have now moved from fighting for land to extortion of money. In fact the other clans are being held ransom by the Bok.

The real face behind the Mt Elgon killings is one ‘Liabon’ Jason Ngwoso Jason Ngwoso Psongoywo who lives in Uganda. This is the leader of the Sabaot Land Defence Forces. The fact that this man controls operations from outside Kenya is part of the reason why the army and police cannot control the violence. This man is described by the Provincial administration as a ‘devil’ and from the stories about him on the ground one understands why.

Official sources told Kumekucha that when one finds the bodies of some of the victims, even hardened soldiers are traumatized. Ngwoso makes the Bok youth perform ritualized killings to strengthen them and cheapen human life. They cut of hands, private parts and gouge out eyes. They also remove internal body parts such as liver. Another reason why army and police are not keen to engage these folk. These guys make Mungiki look like child's play.

They are bold enough to call Police and army commanders just to say hi. They even sometimes call and say ‘I can see you, you are walking along such and such street’ of course they have spies all over the place. They ‘see’ the police or army from way off. They can then evaluate the size and firepower and are gone long before the army can mobilize

The Provincial administration even have the Liabons mobile number but to touch him means to cross into Uganda and in the meantime the carnage that will be unleashed by his boys will be terrifying. They say they have identified many of the killers (Bok) and are now using the army to flush them (kill them) out.

Some staff from Medicins sans Frontier based in Endebess told Kumekucha how 10 days ago they went up the mountain on a medical programme and came across a household of 13 Bukusu that had been slaughtered by the Sebeii who also practice ritualized killings.. One, a pregnant woman had her womb slit open. The fetus had been removed and sliced into little pieces.


IDP’s

In most of the camps that is, Nakuru (Afraha and Showground), Showground Kitale and Endebess and Turbo the majority of the displaced do not want to risk going home yet.

The thing to remember about the camps is that despite the majority of IDP’s being Kikuyu, there are Kalenjin, Luo, Luhya, Turkana, Kisii and Maasai as well. For instance, Afraha in Nakuru (928) is mostly Luo and Luhya while showground is 99% Kikuyu (13,000)

Endebess is 95% Bukusu (4,000) while Kitale showground is a mix ( up to 20,000) and Turbo (2-3000) is mainly Kikuyu.

Conditions in the camp are very difficult and will be compounded by rain. The Kenya Red Cross have done a sterlinbg job in keeping these people alive. Also the UNHCR, Medicin sans frontiers, UNICEF who provide mobile schools and a number of other NGO’s.

Of course there are the usual anomalies such as jobless people who are not displaced register so they can get a place to stay and get free food. Amazingly enterprising Kenyas are taking advantage of the compensation programme (which is yet to officially kick off) and those doing badly (financially) have been known to set their own business and or homes alight and come to the camps then fill in compensation forms and claim far more than they had.

Ultimately the real problem with the IDP’s is where they will go. If they go back home to their farms they may be safe as long as the status quo holds. If Kibaki and Raila fall out, they will be killed the same day. The violence was planned in stages. Apparently what we witnessed was only phase one. Phase 2 was far worse had it come about. Major factories and government installations had been targeted. These would also include private firms owned by Asians and Somali businessmen. For instance, in Eldoret, Raiply and Brookside were phase 2.

The IDP from Western Kenya are more likely to go home sooner as the Luhya are not as hostile as the Kalenjin who have already started farming on IDPs land. In fact the feeling amongst the Kalenjin is that it's over. The Kikuyu have gone and we have our land back and life goes on. The Kalenjin militia can mobilize in hours and now they have guns (they have been buying them).

For instance, yesterday two IDPs went back to their homes in Nandi South. They were asked what they have come for and chased away with a warning never to return or they will be killed. Period.

More information from others on the ground in the Mount Elgon area.

Breaking News:

KTN did not air their usual 9 pm News today. A message flashing across the screen apologized and said that the station was having technical difficulties. Later the same flashing message said that even the 11 pm news would not be aired after all and news will resume tomorrow.