Quit laughing at burning London and get a quick exit plan out of Nairobi

If you live in Nairobi I suggest that you quickly wake up from your deep slumber. I have seen you sit in front of your TV burping and making jokes about what is happening in London with the ongoing riots and mayhem. It seems to delight you greatly that there is rioting on the streets of the mzungu capital. He who called us uncivilized to our faces after what happened here in January 2008.
But hold on a minute.

Some 61 years ago, in the very neighbourhood where you are burping, farting and feeling very safe, some arrogant white settlers sat listening to the radio with the exact same myopic attitude that you have right now. At the time the world was discussing the wind of change sweeping across Africa that was ushering in independence from colonial rule. The settlers joked about the absurdity of the stupid illiterate “monkeys” who couldn’t tell their left foot from their right ever ruling themselves one day. The “silly wind of change” would never reach Kenya they confidently burped. I don’t intend to bore you with my usual history lessons but barely two years later these settlers were on panic mode witnessing some of their own being attacked and others decapitated by the murderous Mau mau gang. Some of the monkeys even wore ties and went to London to demand for independence. Many of them never recovered from the shock.

My advice to you now is to carefully plan a quick and safe exit for you and your family out of Nairobi in the event of serious civil unrest breaking out. You are in the greatest danger if you live in one of those leafy suburbs of the city.

Let me explain. The “revolution” that swept across the Arab world recently was triggered by one incident, a killing of one young man, Mohammed Bouazizi In Tunisia and Kkaled Said in Egypt. In the UK the shooting of the 29-year old Mark Duggan, who died in Tottenham, north London, on Thursday after been shot by the police has started off the worst civil unrest on those shores in centuries. Indeed most people are perplexed and very puzzled at what is happening in that famous, orderly, clean city that is the financial capital of the world.

If we can come back to Kenya for a minute, much worse injustices have been visited upon the people of this beautiful republic and to make matters worse, the political class is busy provoking the masses every other day with something worse than what they did the previous day.

Actually trouble should have broken out here many years ago except for what experts in these matters call a “buffer”. The buffer is the so-called Kenyan middle class. However in recent times, as most of us know, that middle class has been rapidly disappearing. In it’s place a very deep and wide void has developed between the haves and have-nots. If this is not dynamite that is waiting to be ignited by just one small spark, or petrol on the ground with sparks flying all over the place, then I do not know what is.

As you read this, inflation is at a record high and the Kenyan shilling has plummeted to record lows. Amidst all that (and media attention has been diverted from this by the numerous other things happening) petrol prices have cleared the Kshs 110 per litre mark and continue to rise steadily. Even the so-called middle class are feeling the heat.

That is why I submit to you today that trouble could break out at any time. Don’t be caught totally unawares, your life could depend on it.

Kumekucha asked you to prepare for the worst more than a month ago

UK riots… a consumer revolution?

The Evil that the Central Kenya political class are planning

The problem with most Kenyans is that they believe what politicians are saying. They still take those crooks on their word.

Yet as we have seen in this blog too many times, what Kenyan politicians say in public and what they do in private are as different as day and night.

Uhuru Kenyatta: Annointed tribal chief

The president of the republic of Kenya has on countless occasions warned against tribalism and urged Kenyans to show love for their country. Very patriotic, as it should be. But what has State House done in private?

There have been reports for a long time now that the provincial administration (whose salaries are paid by all tax payers) is openly campaigning for Uhuru Kenyatta, mainly in Central province. All other possible candidates have been frustrated at every turn. Yes you heard me right. While Kenyans are dying of hunger the government is busy using the provincial administration to campaign for a candidate of their choice. And any state official who tells Kenyans the truth (like the two sub chiefs in Turkana who talked to the press about people in their jurisdiction dying of hunger) will be disciplined.

The same State house has launched a publicity gimmick campaign pretending that we have local capacity and the will to try and prosecute the Hague 6. We are seeing the Moi tactics of the 90s all over again (where powerful people are questioned by the CID. In the 1990 then powerful cabinet Minister Nicholas Biwott was “held” briefly over the death of former Foreign affairs minister Robert Ouko). This time it is Eldoret North MP William Ruto who is being used for the photo opportunity targeted at the masses of Kenya and the foreign press. The idea is for people to believe that the government is finally moving against the perpetrators of the 2012 violence.

Do not forget it is the same State house that crafted a strategy to turn the good Kikuyu people of Kenya against the rest of the country. They told the people that the Kikuyu were being finished by this “Jaruo” who after taking over the presidency would make it impossible for them to survive in this country. Those who crafted this strategy were safe in their up market houses as innocent Kenyan children were made orphans, while others witnessed their own mothers being brutally raped.

What worries me now and should worry Kenyans is that the same political game played in 2012 is in the works. The wounds of 2008 are still very raw and yet these so-called leaders are busy anointing a Kikuyu tribal chief (in the name of Uhuru Kenyatta) and doing everything in their power to start the 2012 campaigns for him early.

Let me help those not familiar with how politics is played in Kenya and are wondering what I am talking about.

We all know that there are at least three other major candidates from the Kikuyu community seeking the presidency. Namely Peter Kenneth, Martha Karua and Paul Muite. The strategy will be to shut down all the other candidates and elevate Uhuru kenyatta to the situation where he will be the sole candidate representing the Kikuyu who matters. So the strategists have to move quickly to make upstarts like Peter Kenneth, Martha Karua and Paul Muite irrelevant. How will they do it?

They will do it by provoking emotions amongst the Kikuyu electorate. This is the only way because the bitter memories of the IDPs is still on the minds of the electorate. These people some of whom were previously landowners and employers have been reduced to beggars and are yet to be re-settled. So the story the Kikuyu electorate will be given is that they have to deal with the threat to the community first and then the IDPs will be settled later. They are already being told that Uhuru Kenyatta is the only person who can unite the community to deal with the threat against the Kikuyu community. They will be told that “the enemy” has already seen this and that is why Uhuru has ended up at the Hague. They will be told NOT to accept a Uhuru conviction because those working for it want to finish the Kikuyu.

Folks that is the sad reality.

I am keeping my ears on the ground and will regularly report back to you about the real message this evil politicians are spreading on the ground. Forget what you hear them saying on TV. The real message is delivered well away from the press cameras.

Meanwhile my appeal to my fellow Kenyans and especially my dear Kikuyu brethren is to ignore what the politicians are telling them. Their community is not in any danger. And they don’t have to have one of their own in State house or in a powerful position to survive in the new Kenya. May I remind them that they survived in the old Kenya for 24 years under the rule of President Moi who felt very threatened by the Kikuyu community and did everything in his power the marginalize them. Indeed he is the man who inventes tribal clashes in 1991.

Surely in the new Kenya our Kikuyu brethren will thrive as will all communities in Kenya.